Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Wednesday afternoon? Mom is doing well. The weather today was weird. It rained last night & this morning it was sunny then a few hours later it got really dark & the sky was all black. It rained a little bit again but then it cleared up & now the sun is out. The temp is cold though. It is only in the 30's. We were in another winter advisory watch again. Some spots got snow & ice but we didn't. Guess there is another storm system moving in this weekend or beginning of next week & I guess that may hit us hard with snow but it will depend on which way the storm goes. We may get a little a lot or none at all. You know what Mom is hoping for...None...lol! Work your magic for us Tyler, wherever you are so we don't get anymore snow this winter season. If we get no more snow then the most snow we got was not even 20" the whole season. That is unheard of for the New England winters but it was a nice change from what we got last year which was 115" in 5 weeks. Anyways....
  Mom's day was pretty busy again. I did a lot more studying & my brain is fried even more...lol. Actually.... I am in study mode & overload at this point but every day I am 1 step closer to my goal & that is what keeps me going. Honestly, it feels good going back to my old routine of it all. I do miss some of the things that I was doing when I was taking time off but I know that all is ok & everything happens for a reason. I know that it is all good because I know you are here with Mom. I feel you, Tyler. My body is covered with goosebumps a lot now. I know that is you being near me. Mom is told that you are giving goosebumps to others as well. At 1st it was scary & freaked Mom out but I was told to take deep breaths & relax. It was a good thing. I was told to enjoy it knowing you are near. Mom will take that advice & will ask for you to do it more. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. My love for you is unconditional...always has & always will. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. I know you don't like to see Mom this way but sometimes I just can't help it. My heart aches constantly for missing you. I try my hardest but I don't think it is good enough & I really don't know what to do. If you have anything to share with Mom...please go to Aunt Beck & tell her so that she can tell Mom. I would appreciate it so much. Thank you my sweet precious son. 
 Mom only has a couple updates for you tonight. I didn't talk to Meme or Grandpa last night but I did get a message from Aunt Shirley tonight. I guess things are not so well with her & Richard. He had a stress test done & they are awaiting results from that & she is still in a lot of pain. She thought it was her back that was causing the leg pain but the doctors are saying they are concerned because it is not her back & it is just her legs giving out & her muscles are very weak now. This is not good. She can't lift anything or carry anything anymore. She is back to the doctors on the 22nd. Grammy has been alone a lot as well during this time. Can you please be with them during this very difficult time? Thank you. I should be receiving a call or email from Aunt Beck as she flew out today to Peru. I hope everything went well there because the weather this morning was not good & in their favor. That is all that i have for right now for you. 
 Here is your daily prayer for today. March 2~ He maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are still. Then are they glad because they be quiet; so he bringeth them unto their desired haven. Sometimes my heart is so overwhelmed, God, that I don't know where to begin my prayer. Help me to quiet my soul & remember that you know everything inside of my mind before I ever come to you with it. Still, I need to tell you about it, Lord & I know you want me to tell you. Thank you for being such a faithful listener & for caring about everything that concerns me. When I remember that, it helps me slow down, take a deep breath & begin the conversation. Amen. 
 Again, the night sky is fully upon us now & has been for a couple hours now. The sunset was so nice tonight. It was blue skies with clouds that we light pink. They looked like cotton candy. It was really pretty. Did you see Mom smile? I did. Later, I will look to the sky to see if I can see any stars or moon shining bright. Either way I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Mom hopes your night will be all that you need it to be. Hope you have a chance to rest & get some sleep. Sweet dreams to you & come be with me tonight when I sleep. Remember that you are forever in my heart, mind, & soul. You are my hero & Mom's wind beneath my wings. I love you so much. I miss you like crazy. Good night my sweet boy.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Tuesday evening? Today has been a very busy day for Momma. I started my studying & it felt great to get back into it again. So far so good but I know as I get more into it, it will become harder. I know you are right there with me as I go through this process. I am back on the routine that I was in when I was back in school. It works for me. Today also is a busy day in another way as well. Nana's Birthday is today. I believe that she would have been 93 or 94 years old. It is also Meme & Bob's wedding anniversary. They are celebrating 19 years today. Do you remember their wedding? It was in our house. Mom just finished up her chemo treatments. That is how I remember that date for them. I know that you don't celebrate birthdays where you are but please give Nana a big hug & kiss for me. I sure do miss her but I know that you are with her & Pepe. That makes me feel so much better. It makes Mom smile. Thank you pumpkin.
 Mom had the chance to talk to Grandpa last night for awhile. He is doing good & so is Debbie. She was working last night so I didn't get a chance to talk to her. Guess she is still debating on what she is going to do for work...stay where she is or go back to where she was. When she knows what is best for her she will make the decision & the change. I also spoke to Meme. She is doing well. Bob is having a hard time again but I am sure that things will get better again for them. I know this because you are watching over them like you do all of our family & friends. Mom also spoke to Aunt Beck for a bit. She is off tomorrow morning again for South America. This time to Peru for 2 weeks. She is excited but I guess John is not. Maybe that will change when he gets there. I also spoke to Auntie Kristina, Bonnie, & my friends Matt & Gary. It was a busy day on the phone & for everything else. Mom is exhausted as I have been up since 6:45 am & on the go ever since. After dinner I plan on relaxing, having a drink & watching a little tv & then going to bed. I think that is all the updates I have for you right now.
 here is your daily prayer for today. March 1~ Wherefore comfort yourselves together & edify one another, even as also ye do. Bless those who mentor, model, & cheer me on, Lord, urging me towards goals I set, applauding as I reach them & nourishing me to try again when I don't. Remind me to be a cheerleader. I plan to say thanks to those who are mine. Amen.
 The evening sky is almost fully upon us for another night. The sky is a deep blue right now & it is so pretty. Mom will look to the sky before I go to bed tonight to see if I see any stars or the moon shining bright. No matter what I will whisper to you as I do each & every night. Be listening for my voice. mile when you see me smile. I miss you, Tyler. I love you with all that I have. I love you with my heart & soul. Mom hopes that your night is everything you need & want it to be. Have fun up there where you are doing all the things you want to. Continue to fly high & fly free like I know you are doing. Slow down at times so you can rest. Close those sweet beautiful eyes of yours & have the sweetest of dreams. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight as well. 
 Remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!