Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Friday afternoon? Boy today feels like a Monday as it has been a shit show of a day. Mom is just not in a good mood at all. Things seem to be coming at me in all directions and I have no control over any of it and because of that it makes me very sad. I cried many tears today already. I don't know why all of this is happening at all. I can only take a deep breath and hope for the best! Mom can also hope that better news will come along with all this heartache that I feel.

Of course, yesterday was Thanksgiving and that was a hard day but just a sh*tty day completely. No one here in this house cared that it was a holiday. No one really talked and if there was any talking it was mostly a lot of yelling and not in a good way. Mom called the police 3 times on renters as they were being awful with the loud music, yelling, screaming, etc... the music was so loud that it was vibrating our windows. Just the same crap we always deal with. All the houses were full and there were 4-5 cars in each driveway and 11-15 people in each house. No masks or social distancing at all. So much for having people take Covid seriously. It disgusts Mom to no end as Covid is real and no one cares to keep themselves safe or others. I was told this week that 2 people tested positive and then today I received a message that a friend's son tested positive and they all had to go and have a test done and some of them tested positive. This is not cool. This is getting really bad. Friends have lost loved ones and others are getting it....even members of our family, Ty. Mom is praying that there is a cure and that every one is healthy again. I pray for the ones who lost their loved ones. ease continue to keep us safe and healthy. Thank you my sweet precious son. It means so much to Mom. 

Last night I called Aunt Donna as it was her Birthday along with Thanksgiving. She was in a good mood. That was nice. She was sad as this was the 1st holiday without her Dad but she was handling it well. Her brother and sister were good to her this year. That was super nice to hear! We chatted for about an hour. I also ended up calling Grandpa as he didn't call me. He finally answered the phone. He didn't wish me a Happy Thanksgiving and his answers were short and curt. I knew something was up. He told me that him & Debbie hadn't spoken to one another since Monday and it was because of the gift that we sent. Debbie chose to leave and end their marriage. I got blamed for it. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Grandpa didn't want to talk and he cut the call short. I was so hurt. I was quiet for the rest of the night. Everyone went to bed early and Mom and Mark watched football and then went to bed around 10 pm. 

Today, Mark had to work. Meme and Bob have been fighting all day long. Mark and Mom got into one as well so no one really is talking again. Go figure, right? I didn't feel like doing a darn thing and I haven't. I have checked emails, made calls and then sent messages that needed to be sent. I did call Grandpa today to make sure he was ok. He answered and I asked if he was alright. He told me this" Yup...everything is fine and good" I asked what that meant and he said that him and Debbie talked and they are going to try once again and work on things. I told him I was happy for him if that is what he wanted. He sounded good. I told him that I would let him go and then Debbie had to chime in and tell me that the tickets we got them needed to be voided. They were not going to come down in March. I told them that I couldn't and they told me that was not their problem. Grandpa agreed with her. Talk about a slap in the face again. I didn't realize that she was dictating both of their lives now. I am far beyond angry and hurt and disgusted with them both. I told Grandpa I would call him this weekend and he told me that I didn't have to. Wow...just wow. Another blow.... Tyler...Mom is so hurt. I am trying not to think about it as I start to cry. I just don't get it. I guess I never will. I have to say that I will not be calling Grandpa for a bit. I can't. Not now or for a bit. I need to let this go for a bit. I can't forgive either of them for this though. I never will. I know that sounds horrible but I can't. Anyways... I need to stop talking about this... you can see that this is hurting me. 

Also today, Mom saw some sad news. There was a pup named Violet that I followed for many years now. Mom has helped this family out who had her with food, treats, toys, etc... early this morning something happened and she took her last breath at 3 am. I read that on social media and I cried. Mom was heart broken to hear this. The couple who had this precious girl knew I loved her very much. I reached out to them and told them how sorry I was. Jackie wrote back and told me that she knew just how much I loved her just as they did. That made me feel good. Violet had cancer and it was too much for her little body. I hope she knows that she will be missed and still loved. May she rest easy and run free now with her brothers and sisters that crossed the rainbow bridge before her. Today I will be posting pictures of her so you can see her. You would have loved her too. 

Like I said... it has been a sh*t show for several days now.... I hope it get better and things turn around. I will keep praying. I love you so much. To the moon and back and all the way around the world. You are my hero and the wind beneath my wings. Forever you live inb my heart, mind, body and soul. Mom will light a candle tonight for you and I will whisper to you. Smile for me and I will smile back. Have fun while Mom sleeps. Come visit if you can. I will be back over the weekend. For now... It is after 4 pm and Mom needs to get things started for the night routine. Until tomorrow...good night and sweet dreams.

Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah 💛