Dear Tyler
I hope today was a great day for you. I hope you got a lot accomplished because I didn't...lol. Things were crazy again here. Max is taking a turn even more for the worse. He was really bumping into everything and both eyes are completely closed. He is just sleeping and drinking water. Eating very little now. Breaks my heart to watch this. It is just like what Daisy did before she passed. Tyler, please be with Max while he is going through this. I don't think he is in pain.. he is showing no signs of this but just the same... I don't want him to suffer! These are the days I wish I could pick up the phone or skype you and hear your voice. You would make me feel better. I miss you like crazy. This is just so hard and quite frankly it sucks. Some days I just don't know what to do and other days I am ok. I sit and think just how funny life is. Every night when Mark & I walk the dogs I always look up to the sky and wonder where you are. I think about a lot of things. Looking up in the sky is so peaceful. No wonder why you like it so much. I wonder what you are doing. I wonder if you actually sleep or if you don't need sleep any longer. I wonder so many things! So many questions and unknowns about death and life after death. I used to think about it time to time and then I would stop myself because it made me sad...now I think about it more since you passed away. It still makes me sad but my curiosity is peaked. In some ways it makes me feel closer to you. I love you, pumpkin. Sweet dreams my precious son. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, August 8, 2013
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Dear Tyler,
Told you I would write again. It is getting late for Mom and I am tired. Max isnt doing so well. He gets us up through the night. He actually is in rough shape. Makes me sad to know it wont be long for him. Make sure when he passes, you are right there to be with him. He loves and misses you too...same with Snickers. It was your Great Grammy's 93rd Birthday today too. Sent her love from all of us. She looks good and had a very busy day with Aunt Shirley and family. I promise to write tomorrow. Have a good night and sweet dreams. I miss you and love you so much! Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Told you I would write again. It is getting late for Mom and I am tired. Max isnt doing so well. He gets us up through the night. He actually is in rough shape. Makes me sad to know it wont be long for him. Make sure when he passes, you are right there to be with him. He loves and misses you too...same with Snickers. It was your Great Grammy's 93rd Birthday today too. Sent her love from all of us. She looks good and had a very busy day with Aunt Shirley and family. I promise to write tomorrow. Have a good night and sweet dreams. I miss you and love you so much! Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Dear Tyler,
I find today that is a tough day for me so I decided to write to you now so I could feel closer to you. Being in Texas has been ok. Really settling in now and getting used to the weather but not the traffic..thats hell! Dont think that will change anytime soon...people say that it is just getting worse. Anyways...days are so long being alone all the time when Mark is working. I used to skype with you or call you so that I could get my Tyler time and also so that the day went by faster for Mom. I cant do that now so that makes me really sad. I miss you so much. I miss talking to you, hearing your voice and your laugh, and seeing your face. I know I told you that I had a better outlook on things after my session with Forrest, but you need to know that the pain is still there and nobody will replace the void in my heart. No matter what I do that will always remain. You thought you were 3/4 of my world but actually you were my whole world! You were the BEST son any Mom could ever have or ever want. Sometimes I just sit here and remember the times we spent watching movies, playing that damn mini golf game, or beating your butt at Monopoly. I remember the way you acted when you saw a puppy on tv or a baby seal. I can hear you right now. I can hear your voice and it makes me smile. I just miss our times together. I know you are ok and you are happy. Honestly, I am so happy for you pumpkin. Like I said so many times before and I will continue to tell you... thats all I ever wanted for you! I know you are going places and seeing the most beautiful things up there in Heaven. Someday, I will reunite with you and see all those things with you. Again... it will be you & Mom. I love you so much my precious son. I will write later tonight. Until then... Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
I find today that is a tough day for me so I decided to write to you now so I could feel closer to you. Being in Texas has been ok. Really settling in now and getting used to the weather but not the traffic..thats hell! Dont think that will change anytime soon...people say that it is just getting worse. Anyways...days are so long being alone all the time when Mark is working. I used to skype with you or call you so that I could get my Tyler time and also so that the day went by faster for Mom. I cant do that now so that makes me really sad. I miss you so much. I miss talking to you, hearing your voice and your laugh, and seeing your face. I know I told you that I had a better outlook on things after my session with Forrest, but you need to know that the pain is still there and nobody will replace the void in my heart. No matter what I do that will always remain. You thought you were 3/4 of my world but actually you were my whole world! You were the BEST son any Mom could ever have or ever want. Sometimes I just sit here and remember the times we spent watching movies, playing that damn mini golf game, or beating your butt at Monopoly. I remember the way you acted when you saw a puppy on tv or a baby seal. I can hear you right now. I can hear your voice and it makes me smile. I just miss our times together. I know you are ok and you are happy. Honestly, I am so happy for you pumpkin. Like I said so many times before and I will continue to tell you... thats all I ever wanted for you! I know you are going places and seeing the most beautiful things up there in Heaven. Someday, I will reunite with you and see all those things with you. Again... it will be you & Mom. I love you so much my precious son. I will write later tonight. Until then... Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, August 5, 2013
Dear Tyler,
It is night time once again and it is hot hot hot here in Texas. The stars are just shining so brightly. I have a whole new look about the stars now that you described to me what you see on your side. It sounds so beautiful. Today was a pretty down day for me. Spoke to Meme and a friend. I did get the van that was yours donated to a charity so that another family could use it and bring joy to their life as it did for us for so many years. The new family will know just how special the van was and where it came from. I made sure it would go to a deserving home and they would cherish it just as we did. I hope I did the right thing and by doing so I hope I made you proud. I keep thinking about my session with Forrest and how amazing it was. I wish I could have it every day. I wish we could communicate like that always. I felt close to you that day. The pain is and will always be there and the void will never be replaced or go away, but I could never be angry or upset at you for wanting and being ready to go to Heaven. That isnt me. You know that. I never will feel that way. I am sad that I cant see you and hear your voice every day, but I feel peace for you. I have a better understanding of things since Friday. I love you so much. You taught so many people so many things. I know because I learned from you. You taught me patience...something I always lacked, you taught me so much more but nothing more important then unconditional love. I look forward to finding out more and learning what else you are going to teach me in the future. Like I always say.... you are my HERO! I love you with my whole heart and soul. Sweet dreams my precious son. Continue doing all the things you love up there in the sky. Watch over Mom and the rest of our family. I am so very proud of you! Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
It is night time once again and it is hot hot hot here in Texas. The stars are just shining so brightly. I have a whole new look about the stars now that you described to me what you see on your side. It sounds so beautiful. Today was a pretty down day for me. Spoke to Meme and a friend. I did get the van that was yours donated to a charity so that another family could use it and bring joy to their life as it did for us for so many years. The new family will know just how special the van was and where it came from. I made sure it would go to a deserving home and they would cherish it just as we did. I hope I did the right thing and by doing so I hope I made you proud. I keep thinking about my session with Forrest and how amazing it was. I wish I could have it every day. I wish we could communicate like that always. I felt close to you that day. The pain is and will always be there and the void will never be replaced or go away, but I could never be angry or upset at you for wanting and being ready to go to Heaven. That isnt me. You know that. I never will feel that way. I am sad that I cant see you and hear your voice every day, but I feel peace for you. I have a better understanding of things since Friday. I love you so much. You taught so many people so many things. I know because I learned from you. You taught me patience...something I always lacked, you taught me so much more but nothing more important then unconditional love. I look forward to finding out more and learning what else you are going to teach me in the future. Like I always say.... you are my HERO! I love you with my whole heart and soul. Sweet dreams my precious son. Continue doing all the things you love up there in the sky. Watch over Mom and the rest of our family. I am so very proud of you! Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, August 3, 2013
Dear Tyler,
I am so sorry for not writing last night but I was really exhausted from the day. I also wanted to sleep on what I wanted to say to you after my session with Forrest yesterday. I can't thank your Aunt Becky enough for the special gift that she gave me. It was the most sacred and precious gift ever. I know that many people are skeptic or don't believe in readings whether it is Tarot Cards, Angel readings, etc.. but I do. Yesterdays reading with Forrest was such a beautiful insight to what you shared with me and what you are doing in the Spiritual world. Since your passing I have been lost, lonely and a void in my heart. When I got to communicate with you everything changed. Nobody will ever take the pain away or fill my void but I see things differently now. I KNOW you are happy, I KNOW you can move around, I KNOW you could hear me sing and talk to you in the hospital, I KNOW you could feel me holding your hand and giving you kisses. I KNOW you received all your Birthday balloons...as we called it...Your Balloon Launch or as you called it Superman's Rocket Launch! The way you described floating with the balloons and getting them all were beyond words. You said you send love to everyone that was a part of it. You said you felt so much love during that time. I know because you WERE and ARE loved so much still. It made me soooo happy to know that you are with Nana and the rest of the family and friends that have passed on. I was so worried that you were alone. It is so nice to know that you are not, that you are with so many people and experiencing so many things in Heaven and everywhere else you shared with me. Thank you for making me cry happy tears, and laugh. Glad to hear that you still have that sense of humor and you are smiling that " Cheshire Cat grin ". Now everyone can experience YOU the way that I was blessed to have for almost 23 years. I am glad that you know you were my world...not 3/4 as you said but my whole world. If I could change things and have you here again in the physical world I would take care of you all over again. I know you wanted to hear me say that again and again. I would Tyler, at times it was difficult and hard doing things alone for you but it was my honor and joy to be your Mom and your care giver. I wouldn't change anything for the world. I would do ANYTHING to have you back and take this journey with you again. As we used to say... it is" Mom and I against the world", but yesterday you asked to modify this statement and have it say..." Tyler and I with and for the world ". You will always be my HERO and may I do what you did yesterday... I bow to you my precious son for all the teaching you gave me., for all the insights to see life through your eyes. I could go on and on about what we talked about in our session but I believe that not all should be revealed and shared with the world. Some things were meant for just you & I. Thank you for the validation and clarification on questions that I needed answers to. Thanks to you I know there is a beautiful place in Heaven awaiting us all when we are called home. I know that we WILL see each other again. I look forward to our next journey together in the physical world. I know you are with me and watch over me... I feel your presence now. I miss you with all my heart and I love you with every ounce of my soul. I am so proud of you.... All that you did here and all that you are doing now. Continue on and fly free, Tyler. Continue being happy and keep smiling. Continue teaching me and working with me on things that I still need to learn. You are my everything! Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
I am so sorry for not writing last night but I was really exhausted from the day. I also wanted to sleep on what I wanted to say to you after my session with Forrest yesterday. I can't thank your Aunt Becky enough for the special gift that she gave me. It was the most sacred and precious gift ever. I know that many people are skeptic or don't believe in readings whether it is Tarot Cards, Angel readings, etc.. but I do. Yesterdays reading with Forrest was such a beautiful insight to what you shared with me and what you are doing in the Spiritual world. Since your passing I have been lost, lonely and a void in my heart. When I got to communicate with you everything changed. Nobody will ever take the pain away or fill my void but I see things differently now. I KNOW you are happy, I KNOW you can move around, I KNOW you could hear me sing and talk to you in the hospital, I KNOW you could feel me holding your hand and giving you kisses. I KNOW you received all your Birthday balloons...as we called it...Your Balloon Launch or as you called it Superman's Rocket Launch! The way you described floating with the balloons and getting them all were beyond words. You said you send love to everyone that was a part of it. You said you felt so much love during that time. I know because you WERE and ARE loved so much still. It made me soooo happy to know that you are with Nana and the rest of the family and friends that have passed on. I was so worried that you were alone. It is so nice to know that you are not, that you are with so many people and experiencing so many things in Heaven and everywhere else you shared with me. Thank you for making me cry happy tears, and laugh. Glad to hear that you still have that sense of humor and you are smiling that " Cheshire Cat grin ". Now everyone can experience YOU the way that I was blessed to have for almost 23 years. I am glad that you know you were my world...not 3/4 as you said but my whole world. If I could change things and have you here again in the physical world I would take care of you all over again. I know you wanted to hear me say that again and again. I would Tyler, at times it was difficult and hard doing things alone for you but it was my honor and joy to be your Mom and your care giver. I wouldn't change anything for the world. I would do ANYTHING to have you back and take this journey with you again. As we used to say... it is" Mom and I against the world", but yesterday you asked to modify this statement and have it say..." Tyler and I with and for the world ". You will always be my HERO and may I do what you did yesterday... I bow to you my precious son for all the teaching you gave me., for all the insights to see life through your eyes. I could go on and on about what we talked about in our session but I believe that not all should be revealed and shared with the world. Some things were meant for just you & I. Thank you for the validation and clarification on questions that I needed answers to. Thanks to you I know there is a beautiful place in Heaven awaiting us all when we are called home. I know that we WILL see each other again. I look forward to our next journey together in the physical world. I know you are with me and watch over me... I feel your presence now. I miss you with all my heart and I love you with every ounce of my soul. I am so proud of you.... All that you did here and all that you are doing now. Continue on and fly free, Tyler. Continue being happy and keep smiling. Continue teaching me and working with me on things that I still need to learn. You are my everything! Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Friday, August 2, 2013
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin, I hope you had a great day today! It is night time now and it is still so hot and humid in Texas. The weather has been rough the last couple days. It stayed 100 degrees outside until almost 8pm tonight. I know you already know this, but I didnt have my session with Aunt Becky's friend today. We are having it tomorrow. I am kinda excited. I told the gentleman who is doing the reading that I didnt want to hear anything negitive or bad news. I have had enough lately and dont want anymore right now. I am sure that you understand that. I hope you, Nana, and Pepe come forward during my reading. I will be happy. I miss you so much and need to know you are ok and you are happy. I need to have that validated to me. I hope that you get to tell me what you have been doing up there in Heaven. I guess I want to know that you are busy and I am sure you are doing amazing things. I want you to know that Mark and everyone else are taking care of me like they promised you. I want you to know that I am ok. It doesnt mean that I dont have a hard time with you being gone it just means I go along with the days as they come. For Mom it is a day to day process. I hope with this reading it will help clarify things and guide me to do what I am suppose to now. I love you so much. I miss you every minute of every day. The pain never goes away, I am just learning to live with it. Good night my sweet Angel. Sweet dreams my precious son. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin, I hope you had a great day today! It is night time now and it is still so hot and humid in Texas. The weather has been rough the last couple days. It stayed 100 degrees outside until almost 8pm tonight. I know you already know this, but I didnt have my session with Aunt Becky's friend today. We are having it tomorrow. I am kinda excited. I told the gentleman who is doing the reading that I didnt want to hear anything negitive or bad news. I have had enough lately and dont want anymore right now. I am sure that you understand that. I hope you, Nana, and Pepe come forward during my reading. I will be happy. I miss you so much and need to know you are ok and you are happy. I need to have that validated to me. I hope that you get to tell me what you have been doing up there in Heaven. I guess I want to know that you are busy and I am sure you are doing amazing things. I want you to know that Mark and everyone else are taking care of me like they promised you. I want you to know that I am ok. It doesnt mean that I dont have a hard time with you being gone it just means I go along with the days as they come. For Mom it is a day to day process. I hope with this reading it will help clarify things and guide me to do what I am suppose to now. I love you so much. I miss you every minute of every day. The pain never goes away, I am just learning to live with it. Good night my sweet Angel. Sweet dreams my precious son. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)