Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing today in the Heavens above? Mom is quite sad today but I am managing to get by. I am so sorry that I was unable to write to you while in NH. I tried the 1 night on my tablet and had so much trouble that it got the best of me and I didn't try again. I am so glad to be back in Texas so that I can write to you on a regular basis again. I have felt so disconnected from you the last 6 days. Anyways... so much to tell you!
 First off I wanted to say thank you for watching over us while we flew to NH and then back to TX. I know you were with Mark & I and it made me feel so much more comfortable. The flights were pretty much smooth except for a couple times. Knowing you were there with me helped and made it easier. Second, thank you for hearing my prayers and helping me get threw the sickness that I had on Friday & Saturday. Those were pretty rough days and couldn't have come at a worse time. You helped me through them so that I could do my part as a Bridesmaid and not ruin their day! 
 Marion & Charlie's wedding was really nice. Right amount of guests for what they wanted and Marion was such a beautiful Bride & Charlie looked so handsome. They are now married and enjoying their honeymoon. I am so happy for them. I want the best for them always. They are very special friends to me... just like family!
 It was so nice.. beyond nice to see our family. I got to see Meme, Bob, Grandpa, Debbie, Aunt Becky, Great Grammy, Aunt Shirley, Richard, Great Aunt Marion, plus so many friends over the 5 days of being back home. I miss them all and the time went way too fast for me. I went to see you too... it was Sunday, June 15th... Father's Day. Our whole family came with me and we released 18 balloons to the Heavens for you. I sent 1 balloon up to Amy and 1 balloon to Wendy as well. We all put special sayings on them and sent them up to you. I hope you got them and you were floating on them like you did before. I know that Friday is your 1 year Anniversary but I did not want to wait until then. I wanted to do them while I was home and with the rest of the family. I will be sending you up some more balloons on your Birthday next month! 
 Today is just a hard day for me. It is 1 year ago that we skyped for over 1 hour and laughed, joked, and had a couple serious talks. I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember everything about that night. I can hear your voice still... the only thing I didn't know is that it would be the last time we ever spoke to each other. Just thinking about it brings me to tears. If I had only known.... Tomorrow starts the nightmare all over again for me just like every month but worse because it is the month of June. Friday will be the worst of it all. The 1 year of losing you and what a hell year it has been. Such a whirlwind of emotions for Mom. I am glad that I will be alone most of those days so that I can do what I want and just cry if I need to. I miss you so much Tyler. I miss everything about you. I love you so much pumpkin. I just hope you know this and never forget it!
 I am hoping that now that we are back home and Bonnie has gone I can get back to my routine of things. I will look to the evening sky tonight and will hope to see the stars shining brightly. Regardless I know you are up in the Heavens doing good things. I will whisper to you as I always do. Please be listening out for Mom. I hope you have a wonderful night that is restful and peaceful. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. 
 I love you with all my heart, mind, body, & soul....Forever..... Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!