Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday afternoon? The weather today is sunny & warm. I must say it is a lot better than what it was yesterday afternoon & through the evening. The rain, thunder, lightning & wind was intense for about 4 hours. It started around 4:15 pm & went until 8:30 pm or so. It was crazy. I was liking it but Princess & Ozzy were so scared. Ozzy was hiding under the bed & Princess was shaking. To say the least, Mom stopped everything she was doing & went right to them. It was difficult to try & calm them down as the noises were so loud & they were so afraid. They did finally calm down when Mark got home around 8 pm. That gave Mom a little bit of a break. It calls for the same thing later tonight & all day Saturday & Saturday night but Mom is hoping that is not the case. Mark has to work Saturday night so Mom will have to deal with it again by myself. I am praying that everything will be calm for us all. Anything that you may be able to help out with that would be great! Mom would appreciate it so much. Thanks pumpkin!
 I am not sure what is going on with Mom. I am in this funk like I was writing to you about yesterday. I really don't know what my problem is. It is nothing I can pin point out. There are so many things going on right now with Mark's job, my school work, always being alone, friends that say they are my friends but only talk to me when I call them, not having any friends here where we live, etc.... I think it is finally taking a huge toll on Mom & that is why I am not longer biting my tongue & I am saying how I feel. Not many people are happy with that ( including Mark these days ) but that is too bad. Mom needs to start feeling like myself again & these last couple weeks I am anything but that. Mom, as you can see, is almost always sad & depressed. Princess & Ozzy make me smile & make me not feel so alone but it would also be nice to have someone to talk to or go places with from time to time instead of always having to do things alone. Sometimes I find myself teary-eyed because I am so lonely. It is really hard on Mom & I don't think that anyone cares. This is starting to go into a " downward spiral " & I don't want this to happen again. The last time it did was back in 2012 & 2013 ( when I lost you. ) Maybe Mom shouldn't be writing about this on my letter to you but then I said " why not? " If we could talk then these are things I would be telling you. Isn't that the whole point to my letters to you on here? Mom thinks so. We talked about everything. We talked about all kinds of things. Mom never hid anything from you. I was always honest with you. Now you can see it all & you see me.... no way of hiding that from you now...is there? There is 1 thing I want you to know & that is even though you see me like this right now.... there will be better days ahead. Mom will get out of this funk I am in & I will be back to laughing & smiling. Mom just needs to find that place again. Bare with me.... Mom will be okay. 
 Meme called me last night. She was telling me she got her results back from her x-rays. Her chest film looked good, her spine looked good but she does have a fracture in her lower spine/lower back area from when she fell years ago. I guess it never healed. Her hips are giving her problems because arthritis has set in. The doctors are going to give her exercises to help build some muscle up. I tole her that that was better news then what could have been. She agreed. We didn't speak that long though as the storm was happening. I am sure to chat with her again in the next day or 2. Mom also spoke to Grandpa & Debbie. They will be here for a visit next weekend. We will be going shopping for a suit & shirt for Mark for their wedding & getting flowers & other things for decorations. It will be a shopping weekend for sure. Mom is looking forward to it. It will be nice to see them as it has been almost 5 weeks since they were here last. They are checking things off their list of things to do & things to get for their big day. They seem very excited as they should & Mom is so happy for them. Great Grammy will be turning 97 years young next Monday on August 7th. She is holding on & being strong. Mom knows we all get her strength from her. She is a fighter. She is starting to not talk as much anymore Grandpa was saying. She sees things that are not there & tells stories. You just have to go with it or she gets upset. When she sees Mom she is always asking about " my kids. " At 1st I was taken back by it & didn't know what to say but then I stopped to realize she doesn't mean anything by it & she has no short term memory anymore. Bless her heart. Great Grammy still talks about you though. She loves you so much. We all do but no one loves you more than Mom does. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. So many family & friends miss you. No words can ever express just how much but Mom knows you can feel it in your soul. 
 Here is your prayers for the day: May the Lord Himself establish you in His highest and best purposes for you. May He open doors, move mountains, and bring provision in the very near future. May He confirm your faith steps and energize your prayers. He is mighty, He is good, and He cares about every detail of your life. Dare to obey Him and do what He says. He's making a way where there is no way. He loves you truly and deeply. Trust Him today.
  May God fine-tune your spiritual ears so you hear heaven's song above the chaos and the noise. May you rest in the knowledge that God is in control and will have the last say when it’s all said and done. Though the elements rage and the enemy taunts, God is the One who fights for you and He will win for you. He loves you with power and with passion. May His Kingdom come and His will be done everywhere you place your feet. Have a powerful night in Him!
 Here are a couple inspirational messages for you:
 " If you could get up the courage to begin, you will have the courage to succeed. "
 " True strength lies in submission which permits one to dedicate his life, through devotion, to something beyond himself. "
 " Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without. "
 Well it is that time of the evening where Mom needs to be wrapping things up so that I can get to doing the night routine things. I actually get to cook tonight for both Mark & I. That hasn't happened in 4 nights as I have been eating breakfast, lunch & dinner all alone. Mom hopes that your evening will be everything you want & need it to be. May you get the chance to come visit Mom while I am sleeping tonight. Have fun with whatever you do.  Always remember you are my true hero, my shining star & the wind beneath my wings. Mom will whisper to you just like I do every night so be listen out for my voice. Let's smile together. Mom will light a candle for you tonight as well. I will be back tomorrow with another letter so until then....good night & sweet dreams. I will look for the moon, stars & a painting from you tonight as well. Hope I get to see them all. It's been way too long. I love you my sweet precious son.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!