Saturday, April 30, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Saturday evening? Mom is sorry once again for not writing to you Friday but honestly Mom has no excuse. I was feeling ok & I was not overly busy at all but I was quite tired. I didn't really sleep all that much Thursday night. Mom has been awake since 6 am this morning. I had a dream that was more like a nightmare & I just couldn't shake it. I stayed awake while Mark & the puppies were fast asleep. Please forgive me for not writing to you.
Lots has been going on these last few days though. Mom will be enrolling into the review classes this coming week & starting the week of May 9th. I have to wait for my text book & workbook to come in & that will be a 2 month course. After that I should be able to find a testing center to take the CPC certification exam~ hopefully pass it the 1st time & after that I need to update everything again. The next step will be looking for employment. Mom is hoping by August/September I can be employed somewhere & making some money. It has been a long time coming but it will be worth it in the long run. Mark is gearing up to take another big certification exam himself. He has been studying away & working like crazy. All of our family & friends are doing well. Aunt Shirley goes this week to a specialist to see if she will be needing surgery. I hope for her sake she won't. Johnny just took off to Cancun for vacation. He went there last year as well. Don't ever hear from him at all & neither does our family. Not much we can do about that but it is pretty sad. Let's see what else has been going on.... Today was a fairly busy day for Mark & Mom. Mark had a haircut, Mom went shopping & then after we went grocery shopping. Got home around 3 pm & I had to hop on the computer to pay some bills. Got done doing that & then made dinner. Mom made homemade calzones. They were actually pretty yummy. So many weird things have been going on to.. you know how they say things come in 3's well we are on 9 now. It is just one thing after another. Started out with Mark dropping & breaking a glass, then it was a letter about our taxes, then our account was compromised 3 times so we had to cancel everything & now we are having to wait 5 days to get new cards, the other day Mark locked himself out of his truck when he went to a client, then today he was driving & he hit something & screwed up his tire...the list goes on trust me... it happened all this week....dang...Mom is happy to have this week over with....lol. Hopefully this coming week will be better. Please watch over us as you always do. Mom always needs you by her side. Thanks Ty.
Next Sunday will be a hard day for Mom. It is May 8th & it is Mother's Day. I will try to hold my head high & smile as much as I can. Mom can't believe in 15 days I will be turning 45 years old. Doesn't seem possible for that....lol. Mom is signed up for another paint class on the 19th. This time we will be painting in the dark with glow in the dark paints. This should be really interesting but fun. We can choose from painting a tree scene or a skull. Not sure what one Mom will do. Guess I will decide that night. I think that is all the updates that Mom has for you tonight. Might have a few tomorrow night.
The evening sky has set earlier than normal as the clouds are rolling in. The weather today was beautiful. So sunny & blue skies. Temps were 50 degrees. I guess tomorrow it is suppose to rain. Monday as well..Mom can kind of feel it. My head hurts & so does my face. I should be used to it since its been 28 years but Mom is not. It still hurts like h*ll. Mom is not sure if I will be able to see the stars & moon shining bright but no matter what I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear Mom & I will do the same. Mom is hoping that your night is all you need it to be & want it to be. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Come see Mom in my dreams tonight when I fall asleep. Thanks pumpkin. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. Mom forgot to write the daily prayers to you... Here they are. April 29~ He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good & what doth the Lord require of thee but to do justly & to love mercy & to walk humbly with thy God? I am here right now, Father, because I do want to walk in your ways. I know the key is staying connected to you because the ways of the world are all around me, always imposing a different set of values & a different worldview. Give a wise & discerning heart in all things today so I can stay on track. Amen.
April 30 ~ Even there shall thy hand lead me & thy right hand shall hold me. I see a robin's egg hatching, Lord & am set free from my doubts & fretting. For while life is not always filled with joy & happiness, I know it is always held in your hand. Amen.
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Saturday evening? Mom is sorry once again for not writing to you Friday but honestly Mom has no excuse. I was feeling ok & I was not overly busy at all but I was quite tired. I didn't really sleep all that much Thursday night. Mom has been awake since 6 am this morning. I had a dream that was more like a nightmare & I just couldn't shake it. I stayed awake while Mark & the puppies were fast asleep. Please forgive me for not writing to you.
Lots has been going on these last few days though. Mom will be enrolling into the review classes this coming week & starting the week of May 9th. I have to wait for my text book & workbook to come in & that will be a 2 month course. After that I should be able to find a testing center to take the CPC certification exam~ hopefully pass it the 1st time & after that I need to update everything again. The next step will be looking for employment. Mom is hoping by August/September I can be employed somewhere & making some money. It has been a long time coming but it will be worth it in the long run. Mark is gearing up to take another big certification exam himself. He has been studying away & working like crazy. All of our family & friends are doing well. Aunt Shirley goes this week to a specialist to see if she will be needing surgery. I hope for her sake she won't. Johnny just took off to Cancun for vacation. He went there last year as well. Don't ever hear from him at all & neither does our family. Not much we can do about that but it is pretty sad. Let's see what else has been going on.... Today was a fairly busy day for Mark & Mom. Mark had a haircut, Mom went shopping & then after we went grocery shopping. Got home around 3 pm & I had to hop on the computer to pay some bills. Got done doing that & then made dinner. Mom made homemade calzones. They were actually pretty yummy. So many weird things have been going on to.. you know how they say things come in 3's well we are on 9 now. It is just one thing after another. Started out with Mark dropping & breaking a glass, then it was a letter about our taxes, then our account was compromised 3 times so we had to cancel everything & now we are having to wait 5 days to get new cards, the other day Mark locked himself out of his truck when he went to a client, then today he was driving & he hit something & screwed up his tire...the list goes on trust me... it happened all this week....dang...Mom is happy to have this week over with....lol. Hopefully this coming week will be better. Please watch over us as you always do. Mom always needs you by her side. Thanks Ty.
Next Sunday will be a hard day for Mom. It is May 8th & it is Mother's Day. I will try to hold my head high & smile as much as I can. Mom can't believe in 15 days I will be turning 45 years old. Doesn't seem possible for that....lol. Mom is signed up for another paint class on the 19th. This time we will be painting in the dark with glow in the dark paints. This should be really interesting but fun. We can choose from painting a tree scene or a skull. Not sure what one Mom will do. Guess I will decide that night. I think that is all the updates that Mom has for you tonight. Might have a few tomorrow night.
The evening sky has set earlier than normal as the clouds are rolling in. The weather today was beautiful. So sunny & blue skies. Temps were 50 degrees. I guess tomorrow it is suppose to rain. Monday as well..Mom can kind of feel it. My head hurts & so does my face. I should be used to it since its been 28 years but Mom is not. It still hurts like h*ll. Mom is not sure if I will be able to see the stars & moon shining bright but no matter what I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear Mom & I will do the same. Mom is hoping that your night is all you need it to be & want it to be. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Come see Mom in my dreams tonight when I fall asleep. Thanks pumpkin. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. Mom forgot to write the daily prayers to you... Here they are. April 29~ He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good & what doth the Lord require of thee but to do justly & to love mercy & to walk humbly with thy God? I am here right now, Father, because I do want to walk in your ways. I know the key is staying connected to you because the ways of the world are all around me, always imposing a different set of values & a different worldview. Give a wise & discerning heart in all things today so I can stay on track. Amen.
April 30 ~ Even there shall thy hand lead me & thy right hand shall hold me. I see a robin's egg hatching, Lord & am set free from my doubts & fretting. For while life is not always filled with joy & happiness, I know it is always held in your hand. Amen.
Thursday, April 28, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Thursday afternoon? Mom is doing well. The weather today is just so nice & sunny. Blue skies & temps are in the 50's again. The sun woke me up so early this morning. I have been up since 6:30 am. I didn't go back to bed...instead I got up, got ready & did lots of things. It was a pretty productive day. Mom wanted to take the time to write to you now as I will be heading off the computer for the night so I can go make dinner & relax. Today has actually gone by quite fast. Mom spent the majority of the day on the phone...go figure, right? I sure can hear you laugh right now at that statement that I just wrote...lol! Gosh, how I miss that laugh, I miss your face when you laughed, I miss your face period. What I wouldn't give to kiss you on your cheek... that sweet face. Oh Tyler, Mom misses you so so much. It kills me every day that I can't see you but I know one day down the road we will be together again. I will see you again & I will get the chance to hug you. To Mom it will be years from now but to you it will just be seconds as there is no concept of time in spiritual realm. Knowing this makes me smile. You have always been the love of my life since the day you were born. You were my everything. Even death can't stop that. You will continue to always be my one & only love & my everything. Mom talks about you all the time. I love to talk about you, for others to talk about you. It lets me know that you are still alive in their hearts as well. That is so important for me to know. You are missed by so many & loved by them as well. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Please please please never forget this. Thanks, Tyler.
So for updates.... not many but like I said I did spend quite a bit of time on the phone today. I spoke with another college to see what they had to say about Moms issue. I am so glad that I did as I got a lot more useful information & I feel much better. Looks like I need to take a refresher course that will take 2 months & then I can take the CPC Certification Exam. That is so much better than what I was told last Friday. Hopefully that will all be done & over with by Fall. This time I have to go to a testing facility to take the exam. It is 5 hours long & 150 questions. I know Mom has this. I know because you will be right by my side through it all. You will be coaching me the whole time telling me I can do it. Mom will keep you posted as I go along. I got to chat with a couple of friends on the phone as well. It was nice to talk. I really enjoy catching up with everyone. Love to hear what is going on with them & what is happening in their lives. My friends say hello to you. That makes Mom smile really big! I love hearing that! Spoke to Auntie Kristina as well. She is doing good. Oh and I spoke to Aunt Shirley...she called Mom. That was a nice surprise. I am sure I will speak with Meme & Grandpa tonight as I haven't in a few days. Also, I will try to touch base with Aunt Beck too. I will have more updates for you tomorrow.
Here is your daily prayer for tonight. April 28~ According to his divine power hath given unto us all things pertain unto life & godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory & virtue. Father God, you are the giver of all gifts. All of our resources & all we have came from you & they are only ours for a little while. Protect us from any addiction to material things, Lord. Gently remind us when we have enough----enough to eat, enough to wear, enough to enjoy. Most of all, keep us mindful of the fact that because we have you, we have everything we need. Amen.
Well, the night sky will be upon us in the next couple of hours or so. The sunset should be another beautiful one because of the weather we had again today. Mom will look to the sky later to see the stars & moon. I will whisper to you & know we are under the same sky even though I can't see you. Listen for my voice. Smile & so will I. Mom hopes that your evening will be filled with everything that you need to do & everything you want it to be. Have the sweetest of dreams if you can close those sweet eyes of yours. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight as well. I miss you & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world my sweet precious son. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Thursday afternoon? Mom is doing well. The weather today is just so nice & sunny. Blue skies & temps are in the 50's again. The sun woke me up so early this morning. I have been up since 6:30 am. I didn't go back to bed...instead I got up, got ready & did lots of things. It was a pretty productive day. Mom wanted to take the time to write to you now as I will be heading off the computer for the night so I can go make dinner & relax. Today has actually gone by quite fast. Mom spent the majority of the day on the phone...go figure, right? I sure can hear you laugh right now at that statement that I just wrote...lol! Gosh, how I miss that laugh, I miss your face when you laughed, I miss your face period. What I wouldn't give to kiss you on your cheek... that sweet face. Oh Tyler, Mom misses you so so much. It kills me every day that I can't see you but I know one day down the road we will be together again. I will see you again & I will get the chance to hug you. To Mom it will be years from now but to you it will just be seconds as there is no concept of time in spiritual realm. Knowing this makes me smile. You have always been the love of my life since the day you were born. You were my everything. Even death can't stop that. You will continue to always be my one & only love & my everything. Mom talks about you all the time. I love to talk about you, for others to talk about you. It lets me know that you are still alive in their hearts as well. That is so important for me to know. You are missed by so many & loved by them as well. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Please please please never forget this. Thanks, Tyler.
So for updates.... not many but like I said I did spend quite a bit of time on the phone today. I spoke with another college to see what they had to say about Moms issue. I am so glad that I did as I got a lot more useful information & I feel much better. Looks like I need to take a refresher course that will take 2 months & then I can take the CPC Certification Exam. That is so much better than what I was told last Friday. Hopefully that will all be done & over with by Fall. This time I have to go to a testing facility to take the exam. It is 5 hours long & 150 questions. I know Mom has this. I know because you will be right by my side through it all. You will be coaching me the whole time telling me I can do it. Mom will keep you posted as I go along. I got to chat with a couple of friends on the phone as well. It was nice to talk. I really enjoy catching up with everyone. Love to hear what is going on with them & what is happening in their lives. My friends say hello to you. That makes Mom smile really big! I love hearing that! Spoke to Auntie Kristina as well. She is doing good. Oh and I spoke to Aunt Shirley...she called Mom. That was a nice surprise. I am sure I will speak with Meme & Grandpa tonight as I haven't in a few days. Also, I will try to touch base with Aunt Beck too. I will have more updates for you tomorrow.
Here is your daily prayer for tonight. April 28~ According to his divine power hath given unto us all things pertain unto life & godliness, through the knowledge of him that hath called us to glory & virtue. Father God, you are the giver of all gifts. All of our resources & all we have came from you & they are only ours for a little while. Protect us from any addiction to material things, Lord. Gently remind us when we have enough----enough to eat, enough to wear, enough to enjoy. Most of all, keep us mindful of the fact that because we have you, we have everything we need. Amen.
Well, the night sky will be upon us in the next couple of hours or so. The sunset should be another beautiful one because of the weather we had again today. Mom will look to the sky later to see the stars & moon. I will whisper to you & know we are under the same sky even though I can't see you. Listen for my voice. Smile & so will I. Mom hopes that your evening will be filled with everything that you need to do & everything you want it to be. Have the sweetest of dreams if you can close those sweet eyes of yours. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight as well. I miss you & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world my sweet precious son. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Wednesday, April 27, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Wednesday afternoon? Mom is really sorry that I did not write to you last night but as you could see Mom was up to her ears in painting...lol. Did you see my finished product? Mom thinks it came out like poop but I was told by a few others that the painting is really good. I am not sure... I think I need to have a little bit more practice with it all. Now Mom can see why you were so hard on yourself when you painted. You were the worst critic with your work... I get it now. Anything that you can help me with when I am painting I will gladly take it. There is another painting night coming up on May 19th here where Mom lives again. This time it is a glow in the dark painting. That should be interesting to say the least. It will be fun though. Mom will be signing up in a day or so. Last night was not the best time for Mom & Mark.... they say things come in 3's & last night was one & this morning was # 2.... it is nothing life threatening to either of us but it still sucks. We will get over it & get through it but if there is anything you can do to help us out Mom would appreciate it so much. Just steer us or me in the direction I ( we ) need to be going. Thanks pumpkin. The weather today has been so nice. It has been sunny & blue skies... temps are in the 50's. I will take it! Mom has done housework, laundry & took the pups for a nice long walk. They really enjoyed it. Princess barked at everything & Ozzy really just walked for a change. The little bugger is not feeling well. He ate one of his toys yesterday & he was sick. He will be better in a couple days or at least I hope so. Mom also cleaned up her facebook account. I deleted a bunch..actually 100 people from it today. Not that they did anything wrong it is just I don't really ever talk to them outside of the social media so why keep them. There was some stuff that was started that really upset me & I decided that I need to remove myself from that situation. We are not in high school anymore & I don't need the drama let alone the childish head games that go with it. I set a lot of the photos to just me & no one else can see. Lots of changes but they will be for the best. I truly believe that & felt fine right after I made the changes so I guess that is a sign, right? I can hear you right now saying " My little Mommy is growing up "...lol. That always made me smile & laugh. It still does, Tyler. You always made me laugh. Gosh, I miss it so much. I miss you. I miss it all my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You were & still are my world, my everything. Please know & remember this. It means so much for you to know that I think of you all the time & you remain in my heart, mind & soul.
Mom doesn't really have any updates as I didn't do much talking yesterday. I did however talk to Auntie Kristina & she told me that my letters to you were so beautiful & it is if you are still physically here with us. She said she could hear Mom's voice talking & saying these letters out loud. I thought that was so sweet to hear. She also said that there were some letters that were just too hard to read & she had to stop. I let her know that not all my letters to you are like that. So days are harder than others & that is when they get emotional. She understood. She was telling me that she knows that you have been around her a lot lately. That makes me happy & smile. I know you are so busy doing all the things you have to do & all the learning that you are doing as well. It is nice to hear that you are still around. Come visit Meme, Aunt Beck & Mom too. We all miss you like crazy. Mom always needs you near her. need to draw my strength from you as you did me when we were together. I know that makes sense to you & maybe not others but that's ok. That is all that matters.
Here are the 2 daily prayers that I need to get caught up on. April 26~ As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. Please let me help you however I can. Long ages ago it was God's plan for me to serve, to love, & to share, helping ease another's burden of care. So let me be God's loving gift to you because in serving others, I am blessed, too. Amen.
April 27~ For brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but love serve one another. Be ready to offer your gentle touch today----and celebrate the gift of kindness. Reach out to the elderly & infirm. Stretch out your hand to the children & infants. Do not hold back. Celebrate by letting your warmth flow through. And rejoice in the ability to do God's will in this way. Amen.
All caught up. The night sky will be coming in the next couple of hours now. The sun will set around 7pm or so. I am sure it is going to be beautiful though. Mom will be looking to the sky to see if I can see the stars & moon shining bright tonight. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for Mom's voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you. Mom hopes that your evening is filled with love 7 peace. May you do all that you want to & need to. If you do, rest up & have sweet dreams. Come visit mom in her dreams tonight. Thanks. Good night, Tyler. Until tomorrow's letter. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Wednesday afternoon? Mom is really sorry that I did not write to you last night but as you could see Mom was up to her ears in painting...lol. Did you see my finished product? Mom thinks it came out like poop but I was told by a few others that the painting is really good. I am not sure... I think I need to have a little bit more practice with it all. Now Mom can see why you were so hard on yourself when you painted. You were the worst critic with your work... I get it now. Anything that you can help me with when I am painting I will gladly take it. There is another painting night coming up on May 19th here where Mom lives again. This time it is a glow in the dark painting. That should be interesting to say the least. It will be fun though. Mom will be signing up in a day or so. Last night was not the best time for Mom & Mark.... they say things come in 3's & last night was one & this morning was # 2.... it is nothing life threatening to either of us but it still sucks. We will get over it & get through it but if there is anything you can do to help us out Mom would appreciate it so much. Just steer us or me in the direction I ( we ) need to be going. Thanks pumpkin. The weather today has been so nice. It has been sunny & blue skies... temps are in the 50's. I will take it! Mom has done housework, laundry & took the pups for a nice long walk. They really enjoyed it. Princess barked at everything & Ozzy really just walked for a change. The little bugger is not feeling well. He ate one of his toys yesterday & he was sick. He will be better in a couple days or at least I hope so. Mom also cleaned up her facebook account. I deleted a bunch..actually 100 people from it today. Not that they did anything wrong it is just I don't really ever talk to them outside of the social media so why keep them. There was some stuff that was started that really upset me & I decided that I need to remove myself from that situation. We are not in high school anymore & I don't need the drama let alone the childish head games that go with it. I set a lot of the photos to just me & no one else can see. Lots of changes but they will be for the best. I truly believe that & felt fine right after I made the changes so I guess that is a sign, right? I can hear you right now saying " My little Mommy is growing up "...lol. That always made me smile & laugh. It still does, Tyler. You always made me laugh. Gosh, I miss it so much. I miss you. I miss it all my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You were & still are my world, my everything. Please know & remember this. It means so much for you to know that I think of you all the time & you remain in my heart, mind & soul.
Mom doesn't really have any updates as I didn't do much talking yesterday. I did however talk to Auntie Kristina & she told me that my letters to you were so beautiful & it is if you are still physically here with us. She said she could hear Mom's voice talking & saying these letters out loud. I thought that was so sweet to hear. She also said that there were some letters that were just too hard to read & she had to stop. I let her know that not all my letters to you are like that. So days are harder than others & that is when they get emotional. She understood. She was telling me that she knows that you have been around her a lot lately. That makes me happy & smile. I know you are so busy doing all the things you have to do & all the learning that you are doing as well. It is nice to hear that you are still around. Come visit Meme, Aunt Beck & Mom too. We all miss you like crazy. Mom always needs you near her. need to draw my strength from you as you did me when we were together. I know that makes sense to you & maybe not others but that's ok. That is all that matters.
Here are the 2 daily prayers that I need to get caught up on. April 26~ As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. Please let me help you however I can. Long ages ago it was God's plan for me to serve, to love, & to share, helping ease another's burden of care. So let me be God's loving gift to you because in serving others, I am blessed, too. Amen.
April 27~ For brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but love serve one another. Be ready to offer your gentle touch today----and celebrate the gift of kindness. Reach out to the elderly & infirm. Stretch out your hand to the children & infants. Do not hold back. Celebrate by letting your warmth flow through. And rejoice in the ability to do God's will in this way. Amen.
All caught up. The night sky will be coming in the next couple of hours now. The sun will set around 7pm or so. I am sure it is going to be beautiful though. Mom will be looking to the sky to see if I can see the stars & moon shining bright tonight. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for Mom's voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you. Mom hopes that your evening is filled with love 7 peace. May you do all that you want to & need to. If you do, rest up & have sweet dreams. Come visit mom in her dreams tonight. Thanks. Good night, Tyler. Until tomorrow's letter. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, April 25, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday afternoon? Mom is doing fine today. It has been a pretty good day...well the best it can be. You know what I am talking about. Today was a pretty easy going day for me. Didn't really do anything to stressful. I had all intentions on doing a few things & I didn't do them as I got sucked into the dang computer. I did however do some housework & I took the pups for a nice long walk. The weather today is pretty cloudy & overcast. The skies are gray & blah. Guess there will be no chance in seeing the stars & moon shining bright. That's ok... Mom will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear me talking & I will be smiling for you to see as well. Looks like tomorrow will be a busy day for Mom as everything that I put off doing this afternoon will have to be done tomorrow but that is just fine as tomorrow it is suppose to rain all day so it will be a good day to do everything. Mom is still trying to figure out exactly what my next steps are going to be in regards to more schooling & classes. Mark seems to think I can just take the other certification without extra classes & Mom was told that I needed those extra classes so I am just confused. I need to talk to a few more folks to figure things out. Anything you can do to help Mom would be great. If you can put Mom in the right direction I would love that. Yesterday, Mom spoke to Meme & she was talking to Aunt Beck. She asked if she has seen you lately & Aunt Beck said no. Meme said she has felt nothing either. Aunt Beck said you must be pretty busy doing many things, learning lots of new stuff & going to so many places that you need to be at. I sure wish that I knew what you were doing, what you are learning & the places you go to. I am so curious to what exactly goes on. I look at your picture all day throughout the day & just always wonder who is seeing you. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. As I am typing this I am looking at your picture & the tears are just falling from my eyes. Its ok though. I will not stop them. Just know Mom is ok. Just sad. I love you so much, Tyler. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. I always have & I always will. Please never ever forget that. If I could I would bring you back & take care of you again. I would do it all over a hundred times just to have you with Mom. I know that is selfish as your life here in the physical world had so many limitations & I would never want that for you again as I know you are happy where you are but I think you know what I am trying to say to you. Mom is hoping to touch base with Forrest this week to get an appointment to have my reading. I am hoping that you, Nana, Pepe, Wendy, Holly & maybe Ron comes through. I would love to hear from you all but especially you, Tyler. I know you are busy but if you can just try for me it would mean the world to me. I will let you know when I have the date.
Mom really doesn't have any updates for you tonight as I didn't really talk to anyone last night. We had to cancel our skype call as Mark was not feeling well & neither was Tubal or Karen. All 3 of them were sick. I am sure I will have some updates for you in tomorrows letter. I did talk to my friend, Gary. He said to tell you hello. He asked Mom to find a favorite picture of you & he wants Mom to send it to him. He said he wanted to do something & had something in mind to do for my Birthday. I told him it was not necessary but he insisted. He said that I have helped him so much that he wanted to do this for Mom. I think it is so sweet. Whatever he has in mind I am sure I will love it & also shed several tears....go figure, right? That is your Mom for you.
Here is your daily prayer for today. April 25~ And thou shalt be secure, because there is hope; yea, thou shalt dig about thee & thou shalt take thy rest in safety. Almighty God, I know you are supremely faithful! Today I ask you to restore hope to the hopeless. Plant seeds of hope in hearts that have lain fallow for so long. Send down showers of hope on those struggling with illness, persecution or difficult relationships. Hope that comes from you is hope with the power to sustain us when nothing around us seems the least bit hopeful. Amen.
The evening sky is going to upon us in the next hour or so. Think due to the weather it will be coming faster than normal. Mom hopes that you have a peaceful & restful evening. May you do all that you have to do & want to do. May you get the chance to rest or if you can close your eyes for a few minutes, think of Mom as I always am thinking of you. Please come visit me in my dreams tonight when I lay my head down to fall asleep. Thank you. Please continue to watch over our family & friends as I know you always do. It means so much to us all. Remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you more than words can say. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday afternoon? Mom is doing fine today. It has been a pretty good day...well the best it can be. You know what I am talking about. Today was a pretty easy going day for me. Didn't really do anything to stressful. I had all intentions on doing a few things & I didn't do them as I got sucked into the dang computer. I did however do some housework & I took the pups for a nice long walk. The weather today is pretty cloudy & overcast. The skies are gray & blah. Guess there will be no chance in seeing the stars & moon shining bright. That's ok... Mom will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear me talking & I will be smiling for you to see as well. Looks like tomorrow will be a busy day for Mom as everything that I put off doing this afternoon will have to be done tomorrow but that is just fine as tomorrow it is suppose to rain all day so it will be a good day to do everything. Mom is still trying to figure out exactly what my next steps are going to be in regards to more schooling & classes. Mark seems to think I can just take the other certification without extra classes & Mom was told that I needed those extra classes so I am just confused. I need to talk to a few more folks to figure things out. Anything you can do to help Mom would be great. If you can put Mom in the right direction I would love that. Yesterday, Mom spoke to Meme & she was talking to Aunt Beck. She asked if she has seen you lately & Aunt Beck said no. Meme said she has felt nothing either. Aunt Beck said you must be pretty busy doing many things, learning lots of new stuff & going to so many places that you need to be at. I sure wish that I knew what you were doing, what you are learning & the places you go to. I am so curious to what exactly goes on. I look at your picture all day throughout the day & just always wonder who is seeing you. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. As I am typing this I am looking at your picture & the tears are just falling from my eyes. Its ok though. I will not stop them. Just know Mom is ok. Just sad. I love you so much, Tyler. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. I always have & I always will. Please never ever forget that. If I could I would bring you back & take care of you again. I would do it all over a hundred times just to have you with Mom. I know that is selfish as your life here in the physical world had so many limitations & I would never want that for you again as I know you are happy where you are but I think you know what I am trying to say to you. Mom is hoping to touch base with Forrest this week to get an appointment to have my reading. I am hoping that you, Nana, Pepe, Wendy, Holly & maybe Ron comes through. I would love to hear from you all but especially you, Tyler. I know you are busy but if you can just try for me it would mean the world to me. I will let you know when I have the date.
Mom really doesn't have any updates for you tonight as I didn't really talk to anyone last night. We had to cancel our skype call as Mark was not feeling well & neither was Tubal or Karen. All 3 of them were sick. I am sure I will have some updates for you in tomorrows letter. I did talk to my friend, Gary. He said to tell you hello. He asked Mom to find a favorite picture of you & he wants Mom to send it to him. He said he wanted to do something & had something in mind to do for my Birthday. I told him it was not necessary but he insisted. He said that I have helped him so much that he wanted to do this for Mom. I think it is so sweet. Whatever he has in mind I am sure I will love it & also shed several tears....go figure, right? That is your Mom for you.
Here is your daily prayer for today. April 25~ And thou shalt be secure, because there is hope; yea, thou shalt dig about thee & thou shalt take thy rest in safety. Almighty God, I know you are supremely faithful! Today I ask you to restore hope to the hopeless. Plant seeds of hope in hearts that have lain fallow for so long. Send down showers of hope on those struggling with illness, persecution or difficult relationships. Hope that comes from you is hope with the power to sustain us when nothing around us seems the least bit hopeful. Amen.
The evening sky is going to upon us in the next hour or so. Think due to the weather it will be coming faster than normal. Mom hopes that you have a peaceful & restful evening. May you do all that you have to do & want to do. May you get the chance to rest or if you can close your eyes for a few minutes, think of Mom as I always am thinking of you. Please come visit me in my dreams tonight when I lay my head down to fall asleep. Thank you. Please continue to watch over our family & friends as I know you always do. It means so much to us all. Remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you more than words can say. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Sunday, April 24, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this sunny Sunday afternoon? Things with Mom are the best that they can be. I am so sorry about last nights letter but Mom was just so tired. I wanted to make sure that I got the chance to write to you today so that is why I am doing it now as tonight is going to be a bit crazy with dinner, a skype call etc...
Mom managed to do some changes on here. I added a picture of Mark & Mom, Princess & Ozzy plus I added a song on here that makes me think of you every time I hear it. Mom also did some deleting of a few songs not because I don't like them~ I just thought I would switch it up every once in a while. There are so many songs out there that make me think of you & I want to share them with all who read my letters to you every night. Hope you like the new changes. I am going to try & switch it up every couple of months. Hope you won't mind.
Mom has a few updates for you~ Let's see where to start... Spoke to Meme last night along with Grandpa & Debbie. Every one is doing well. Bob had a doctor's app't & it sounded like everything is good other than Bob needs to get as much exercise as he can. Be outdoors more. That is a great sign & Mom was so happy to hear this news. Grandpa & Debbie are good. Staying busy & working a lot. Aunt Beck is well. Mom will be calling her tomorrow to chat for a bit. Aunt Shirley is still trying to have the doctor's figure out what exactly is also going on with her. She is still in a lot of pain & this is now 3 months. Yesterday Great Grammy fell. The nurses found her on the floor. It was so sad to hear & by the sounds of it she is failing fast now. She doesn't remember much, sleeps a lot now & gets ill more often. I know this comes with the territory of being her age at almost 96 years old, but I still think she is hanging in there for some reason. She still has things to finish here before she is called home to be with you & all her other family & friends. Mark is doing well. Same ole same ole with him. Works a ton of hours & never complains about it. Pups are doing good. Took them for a long walk today as it is nice & sunny outside. They enjoyed it & barked at everything & anything that they could...lol. Mark's side of the family is doing well. They are just really busy with working but health wise they are well. We will be skyping with Tubal & Karen tonight as we always do every other week. I think we will be planning a long weekend trip to see them pretty soon. It will be nice as it has been almost 1 1/2 years since we have seen them. Mom is doing the best she can. I have my days though. Its that roller coaster of a ride. On Friday, Mom found out that I need to do more schooling & get another certification before I can go out into the working world. I was discouraged to find this out. I thought that the schooling I have taken & the certification that I already got would get my foot in the door but apparently I don't have the correct certification to do just that yet. So I need to save money to be able to take these classes & then take this another exam. It is a mess though. I was excited to look for a job & get back out into the world but I guess that is not in the cards for Mom just yet. I will hold my head up high though & just keep plugging along. I know that in time everything will work out the way it is suppose to. I just need to be patience that's all. I know you will be watching over all our family & friends & you will be right by Mom's side through it all. With knowing & feeling this, Mom will have the strength to continue & move forward. Thank you, Tyler for all that you do for us. Mom appreciates it as I know every one else does too. Think that is all the updates for now.
I do however have a few daily prayers to write out to you so I want to get them started now. Here they are. April 22~ Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein. And he took them up in his arms, put his hands upon them & blessed them. O Lord, what a blessing children are in this world. They bring such joy into our lives & are a precious composite of the best of our past & the hopes for the future. Thank you for your love for all the children, Lord. Please guard them always. Amen.
April 23~ I have made the earth; and created man upon it: I, even my hands, have stretched out the heavens & all their host have I commanded. What " speaks " to you in nature? The amazing variety of birds coming & going at your bird feeder? The petals on those wildflowers by your mailbox? The smell of the air after a rainstorm? The night sky? Maybe you simply wonder how those weeds can find a way to thrive in the cracks of the sidewalk. Whatever impresses us among the things God has made, it's a part of his messaging system to us, inviting us to search him out & find relationship with him. Amen.
April 24~ Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fullness of joy; at they right hand there are pleasures for everyone.God, shine your healing light down upon me today, for my path is filled with painful obstacles & my suffering fogs my vision. Clear the challenges from the road I must walk upon or at least walk with me as I confront them. With you, I know I can endure anything. With you, I know I can make it through to the other side, where joy awaits. Amen.
Ok, Mom is finally all caught up on the prayers. Wow, that really feels better to me. It feels great that I am writing to you as well. I always feel so much closer to you, Tyler when I do. I can't explain it to you or anyone...it is just a feeling that Mom gets. The sun won't be setting for at least another 4 hours but that is ok. I believe that it will be a beautiful one as the day is still sunny with blue skies. I am hoping that the night sky is clear & we are able to see the stars & moon shining bright. I will be sure to whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for Mom's voice. Hope you hear me & smile when you hear it. I will make sure to smile as I am chatting with you so you can see my smile as well. I sure miss you bunches my sweet precious son. Mom loves you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Mom is hoping that your night will be filled with much peace & happiness. I am hoping that it will be filled with all that you are needed to do & what you would like to do as well. I know you are busy. Mom is proud even though I can't visually see what & where you are. I have always been proud of you. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings.
Get some rest tonight if that is something that you do. Sweet dreams is always a must though. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight when I close my eyes & fall asleep. Thanks pumpkin. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Have a great afternoon & an even better night. I love you unconditionally, Ty.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this sunny Sunday afternoon? Things with Mom are the best that they can be. I am so sorry about last nights letter but Mom was just so tired. I wanted to make sure that I got the chance to write to you today so that is why I am doing it now as tonight is going to be a bit crazy with dinner, a skype call etc...
Mom managed to do some changes on here. I added a picture of Mark & Mom, Princess & Ozzy plus I added a song on here that makes me think of you every time I hear it. Mom also did some deleting of a few songs not because I don't like them~ I just thought I would switch it up every once in a while. There are so many songs out there that make me think of you & I want to share them with all who read my letters to you every night. Hope you like the new changes. I am going to try & switch it up every couple of months. Hope you won't mind.
Mom has a few updates for you~ Let's see where to start... Spoke to Meme last night along with Grandpa & Debbie. Every one is doing well. Bob had a doctor's app't & it sounded like everything is good other than Bob needs to get as much exercise as he can. Be outdoors more. That is a great sign & Mom was so happy to hear this news. Grandpa & Debbie are good. Staying busy & working a lot. Aunt Beck is well. Mom will be calling her tomorrow to chat for a bit. Aunt Shirley is still trying to have the doctor's figure out what exactly is also going on with her. She is still in a lot of pain & this is now 3 months. Yesterday Great Grammy fell. The nurses found her on the floor. It was so sad to hear & by the sounds of it she is failing fast now. She doesn't remember much, sleeps a lot now & gets ill more often. I know this comes with the territory of being her age at almost 96 years old, but I still think she is hanging in there for some reason. She still has things to finish here before she is called home to be with you & all her other family & friends. Mark is doing well. Same ole same ole with him. Works a ton of hours & never complains about it. Pups are doing good. Took them for a long walk today as it is nice & sunny outside. They enjoyed it & barked at everything & anything that they could...lol. Mark's side of the family is doing well. They are just really busy with working but health wise they are well. We will be skyping with Tubal & Karen tonight as we always do every other week. I think we will be planning a long weekend trip to see them pretty soon. It will be nice as it has been almost 1 1/2 years since we have seen them. Mom is doing the best she can. I have my days though. Its that roller coaster of a ride. On Friday, Mom found out that I need to do more schooling & get another certification before I can go out into the working world. I was discouraged to find this out. I thought that the schooling I have taken & the certification that I already got would get my foot in the door but apparently I don't have the correct certification to do just that yet. So I need to save money to be able to take these classes & then take this another exam. It is a mess though. I was excited to look for a job & get back out into the world but I guess that is not in the cards for Mom just yet. I will hold my head up high though & just keep plugging along. I know that in time everything will work out the way it is suppose to. I just need to be patience that's all. I know you will be watching over all our family & friends & you will be right by Mom's side through it all. With knowing & feeling this, Mom will have the strength to continue & move forward. Thank you, Tyler for all that you do for us. Mom appreciates it as I know every one else does too. Think that is all the updates for now.
I do however have a few daily prayers to write out to you so I want to get them started now. Here they are. April 22~ Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein. And he took them up in his arms, put his hands upon them & blessed them. O Lord, what a blessing children are in this world. They bring such joy into our lives & are a precious composite of the best of our past & the hopes for the future. Thank you for your love for all the children, Lord. Please guard them always. Amen.
April 23~ I have made the earth; and created man upon it: I, even my hands, have stretched out the heavens & all their host have I commanded. What " speaks " to you in nature? The amazing variety of birds coming & going at your bird feeder? The petals on those wildflowers by your mailbox? The smell of the air after a rainstorm? The night sky? Maybe you simply wonder how those weeds can find a way to thrive in the cracks of the sidewalk. Whatever impresses us among the things God has made, it's a part of his messaging system to us, inviting us to search him out & find relationship with him. Amen.
April 24~ Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence is fullness of joy; at they right hand there are pleasures for everyone.God, shine your healing light down upon me today, for my path is filled with painful obstacles & my suffering fogs my vision. Clear the challenges from the road I must walk upon or at least walk with me as I confront them. With you, I know I can endure anything. With you, I know I can make it through to the other side, where joy awaits. Amen.
Ok, Mom is finally all caught up on the prayers. Wow, that really feels better to me. It feels great that I am writing to you as well. I always feel so much closer to you, Tyler when I do. I can't explain it to you or anyone...it is just a feeling that Mom gets. The sun won't be setting for at least another 4 hours but that is ok. I believe that it will be a beautiful one as the day is still sunny with blue skies. I am hoping that the night sky is clear & we are able to see the stars & moon shining bright. I will be sure to whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for Mom's voice. Hope you hear me & smile when you hear it. I will make sure to smile as I am chatting with you so you can see my smile as well. I sure miss you bunches my sweet precious son. Mom loves you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Mom is hoping that your night will be filled with much peace & happiness. I am hoping that it will be filled with all that you are needed to do & what you would like to do as well. I know you are busy. Mom is proud even though I can't visually see what & where you are. I have always been proud of you. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings.
Get some rest tonight if that is something that you do. Sweet dreams is always a must though. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight when I close my eyes & fall asleep. Thanks pumpkin. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Have a great afternoon & an even better night. I love you unconditionally, Ty.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, April 23, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Saturday night? Mom has had a busy day that started early this morning. Did lots of housework, laundry, took care of the pups & then headed out to go to a couple appointments & then grocery shopping. Finally got home around 4 pm & put every thing away & then had dinner, etc... Mom is quite tired tonight...lol.
I wanted to stop on by to write a small letter to tell you that I love you & I miss you so much. I will write a longer one with all the updates & the 3 daily prayers for you in tomorrows letter. Mom is so sorry & hope you are not upset with me but my eyes are just ready to close at this point. I haven't been sleeping all that much either but you knew that already.
Mom hopes that you have a restful evening doing all the things you want & need to do. If you get to sleep, please have the sweetest of dreams & come be with Mom tonight. Come visit me in my dreams. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings my sweet precious son. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Smile & I will to. Until tomorrows letter, Good night, Tyler. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Saturday night? Mom has had a busy day that started early this morning. Did lots of housework, laundry, took care of the pups & then headed out to go to a couple appointments & then grocery shopping. Finally got home around 4 pm & put every thing away & then had dinner, etc... Mom is quite tired tonight...lol.
I wanted to stop on by to write a small letter to tell you that I love you & I miss you so much. I will write a longer one with all the updates & the 3 daily prayers for you in tomorrows letter. Mom is so sorry & hope you are not upset with me but my eyes are just ready to close at this point. I haven't been sleeping all that much either but you knew that already.
Mom hopes that you have a restful evening doing all the things you want & need to do. If you get to sleep, please have the sweetest of dreams & come be with Mom tonight. Come visit me in my dreams. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings my sweet precious son. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Smile & I will to. Until tomorrows letter, Good night, Tyler. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, April 21, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom started out by having a good day & as the hours went by I have been kinda sick. Tummy issues tonight....it has been ginger ale & peppermints for me. I seem to be doing a little better right now though. Anyways...enough of that subject... The weather today was so sunny & warm. It hit 75 degrees today. Mom took Princess & Ozzy for a long walk & just enjoyed the warm sun on my face as I looked up to the sky. It made me think of you when I closed my eyes...Mom saw your face & what you used to look like when you looked to the sky. It brought a smile to my face but also some tears. I miss you like crazy my sweet precious son. I miss your face, your voice, your smile, your laugh, your advice you gave me... I just miss it all. I love you so much still & Mom always will. It is unconditional love that we had for one another. You taught Mom so much in the short years that you were here with me but unconditional love was the biggest & the most special. I think... no I know you taught so many of us this. You were a wonderful teacher you just didn't know it. You were & still are so loved. Mom always told you this but you always refused to believe it. I hope now you know & realize just how much. I hope it puts a smile on your face as it does for Mom. I know you are busy wherever you may be & I know you are learning so much. I can't physically see it but I can feel it & Mom is just so proud. I was always proud of all you did & accomplished in your lifetime here & I always will be proud of you. Never forget that, ok?
Not many updates for you today. Mom spoke to Auntie Kristina for a little bit. That was a great conversation as it always is. We are like sisters. We get each other...but you already know that. You saw it with your own eyes. Do you remember all the times with Dad, Mom, Auntie Kristina, Bob & Ryan? Even though times had changed we still had many great times to look back on. Auntie Kristina & I talk about them quite a bit actually. We have some good laughs & we also shed some tears too. Mom also had another conversation that was a bit tougher today. It was a struggle but I feel it was necessary. Some things got accomplished but not all. There needs to be a few more talks to get through this. I know you saw Mom being sad. There are a lot of those days but always know that Mom will be ok. I am strong. I now get my strength from you as you did from me when you were here. I am hoping that in time things will get better. Mom could sure use your help through this one. Thanks pumpkin! Every one else seems to be doing well. As you know, life is tough. We all have our ups & downs & do our best to get through all the hurdles that we are given. Sometimes we do really well & other times we don't get anything right. This is where we are suppose to learn & grow. I know you know that all to well. Tyler, you were Mom's inspiration. I say that from the bottom of my heart & I know you know because you can feel it. When there were days I didn't think I could carry on, I would look at you, I would watch you & say if you could do it then so could I. There were so many of those days that you just didn't know about but you do right now this very moment. You were a smart guy. Some days & sometimes you knew more than I. God, I miss you. No words can describe just how much Mom does. Mom saw today that Megan is engaged. The ring is beautiful. I am so happy for her as I know you are too. I know you were smiling down upon her as it happened! The only updates that I have for you is that the world lost a couple stars today. I know you already know about them but boy Mom was shocked about Prince passing & also Chyna. I remember you liked her & loved to watch her wrestle. Many folks across the world are mourning these losses. Always tragic when someone loses a loved one. May they R.I.P. now.
That is all for the updates but I do have the daily prayer for you. April 21~ For, lo, he that formeth the mountains & createth the wind & declareth unto man what is his thought, that maketh the morning darkness & treadeth upon the high places of the earth, The Lord, The God of hosts, is his name. Amen. Lord, we praise you for all the beauty & wonder you've placed in the world. How creative of you to think of a creature as exuberant & joyful as the hummingbird! How interesting that you sprinkled spots on the backs of the newborn fawns that follow along behind their mother through our backyard. Let us never become so accustomed to your glorious creation that we take it for granted, Lord. You've blessed us with a wonderland & we thank you for it. Amen.
The night sky is & has been upon us for a couple hours now. The sunset was quite pretty tonight. It was just like a painting. The skyline is gorgeous as ever. Mom loves to look at it from our balcony. Sometimes I just get lost in thought when I am out there. My mind wanders about so many things. It is a peaceful place for me. I know you see Mom at those times too. I know these are the times you are at peace while looking at me or perhaps when you are right next to me. You know that I will get through whatever is going on in my life. You are content in feeling this & seeing this. Thank you for always being next to Mom. Thank you for always watching over me, all our family & friends. Again, it means so much to us all.
Mom is hoping that wherever you may be tonight that your evening will be all that you need & want it to be. I am hoping that I get to see the moon shining bright again tonight & maybe some stars too. No matter what I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Mom sure hopes you can hear me talking to you. Don't forget to smile & I won't either.
Rest easy if you can & have sweet dreams. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight if you get the chance. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You will forever be my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom started out by having a good day & as the hours went by I have been kinda sick. Tummy issues tonight....it has been ginger ale & peppermints for me. I seem to be doing a little better right now though. Anyways...enough of that subject... The weather today was so sunny & warm. It hit 75 degrees today. Mom took Princess & Ozzy for a long walk & just enjoyed the warm sun on my face as I looked up to the sky. It made me think of you when I closed my eyes...Mom saw your face & what you used to look like when you looked to the sky. It brought a smile to my face but also some tears. I miss you like crazy my sweet precious son. I miss your face, your voice, your smile, your laugh, your advice you gave me... I just miss it all. I love you so much still & Mom always will. It is unconditional love that we had for one another. You taught Mom so much in the short years that you were here with me but unconditional love was the biggest & the most special. I think... no I know you taught so many of us this. You were a wonderful teacher you just didn't know it. You were & still are so loved. Mom always told you this but you always refused to believe it. I hope now you know & realize just how much. I hope it puts a smile on your face as it does for Mom. I know you are busy wherever you may be & I know you are learning so much. I can't physically see it but I can feel it & Mom is just so proud. I was always proud of all you did & accomplished in your lifetime here & I always will be proud of you. Never forget that, ok?
Not many updates for you today. Mom spoke to Auntie Kristina for a little bit. That was a great conversation as it always is. We are like sisters. We get each other...but you already know that. You saw it with your own eyes. Do you remember all the times with Dad, Mom, Auntie Kristina, Bob & Ryan? Even though times had changed we still had many great times to look back on. Auntie Kristina & I talk about them quite a bit actually. We have some good laughs & we also shed some tears too. Mom also had another conversation that was a bit tougher today. It was a struggle but I feel it was necessary. Some things got accomplished but not all. There needs to be a few more talks to get through this. I know you saw Mom being sad. There are a lot of those days but always know that Mom will be ok. I am strong. I now get my strength from you as you did from me when you were here. I am hoping that in time things will get better. Mom could sure use your help through this one. Thanks pumpkin! Every one else seems to be doing well. As you know, life is tough. We all have our ups & downs & do our best to get through all the hurdles that we are given. Sometimes we do really well & other times we don't get anything right. This is where we are suppose to learn & grow. I know you know that all to well. Tyler, you were Mom's inspiration. I say that from the bottom of my heart & I know you know because you can feel it. When there were days I didn't think I could carry on, I would look at you, I would watch you & say if you could do it then so could I. There were so many of those days that you just didn't know about but you do right now this very moment. You were a smart guy. Some days & sometimes you knew more than I. God, I miss you. No words can describe just how much Mom does. Mom saw today that Megan is engaged. The ring is beautiful. I am so happy for her as I know you are too. I know you were smiling down upon her as it happened! The only updates that I have for you is that the world lost a couple stars today. I know you already know about them but boy Mom was shocked about Prince passing & also Chyna. I remember you liked her & loved to watch her wrestle. Many folks across the world are mourning these losses. Always tragic when someone loses a loved one. May they R.I.P. now.
That is all for the updates but I do have the daily prayer for you. April 21~ For, lo, he that formeth the mountains & createth the wind & declareth unto man what is his thought, that maketh the morning darkness & treadeth upon the high places of the earth, The Lord, The God of hosts, is his name. Amen. Lord, we praise you for all the beauty & wonder you've placed in the world. How creative of you to think of a creature as exuberant & joyful as the hummingbird! How interesting that you sprinkled spots on the backs of the newborn fawns that follow along behind their mother through our backyard. Let us never become so accustomed to your glorious creation that we take it for granted, Lord. You've blessed us with a wonderland & we thank you for it. Amen.
The night sky is & has been upon us for a couple hours now. The sunset was quite pretty tonight. It was just like a painting. The skyline is gorgeous as ever. Mom loves to look at it from our balcony. Sometimes I just get lost in thought when I am out there. My mind wanders about so many things. It is a peaceful place for me. I know you see Mom at those times too. I know these are the times you are at peace while looking at me or perhaps when you are right next to me. You know that I will get through whatever is going on in my life. You are content in feeling this & seeing this. Thank you for always being next to Mom. Thank you for always watching over me, all our family & friends. Again, it means so much to us all.
Mom is hoping that wherever you may be tonight that your evening will be all that you need & want it to be. I am hoping that I get to see the moon shining bright again tonight & maybe some stars too. No matter what I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Mom sure hopes you can hear me talking to you. Don't forget to smile & I won't either.
Rest easy if you can & have sweet dreams. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight if you get the chance. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You will forever be my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Wednesday, April 20, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is doing alright with all things considered. Today was an ok day for me. I kept busy with doing all kinds of things so that I could just make it through the day without losing it. 34 months ago you left us all here in the physical world. Some days it seems like yesterday & other days it seems like it was much longer than it really is. No matter how the days & nights feel there is not 1 second of 1 minute of 1 hour of 1 day that doesn't go by that you are not thought about. You are & always will be constantly in my heart, mind & soul. Mom misses you so much. So much more than I could ever explain to anyone. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Yesterday, I did something different & I wrote to you on your facebook page. I thought that I would switch it up a bit & then realized that not everyone can get to your account now so I decided to go back to writing to you on here. I know that you don't mind where I write or how many times I write to you as you can see all now & you are right by my side when I am doing your letters & really...that is all that matters to Mom.
Last night I looked to the sky & saw the moon shining bright. I didn't see any stars though. When I saw it, I had the biggest smile on my face & I whispered to you. Did you hear Mom? Did you see me smile? I hope so. Mom is hoping to see the moon & stars shining bright again as today was so sunny & nice. The sky was a beautiful shade of blue & there were no clouds. Mom is hoping for a clear night as well. Be listening out again because no matter what I will be whispering to you as I always do.
Mom went out again today on her own. I did it last week & I did it again today, like I said. It felt great to just get up & go. This time I was so much more confident than last week. I just hopped right into my vehicle & away I went. I ran a few errands & then did a little shopping. I was out for a couple hours. Mom came home & then I got onto my computer & did some job searching & other searches for my CEUs that I need to start working on. I also put my resume out there on a couple more websites. would say that I had a very productive day & did exactly what I set out to do....stayed very busy so my mind would not start to wander & think. That is what I was avoiding but now things are done & it is time to settle down from a long day & relax. This is really when Mom starts to think & remember things. It is tough, Ty. Time is not making it any better. I think that time is making it much worse. I am doing all that I can & the best that I can with the circumstances that I have been left with. I know you see my emotional roller coaster ride of emotions all the time. I can't & won't apologize for them....all I can say is just please continue to be patience with Mom. Help me with the strength that I need to just continue on. That is what I need & ask of you. Thank you so much.
Let's see...updates for you... Spoke to Meme today & she got her new vehicle finally. So happy for her. She got your favorite color...Red! I know you were smiling down when that happened. Her & Bob are doing well. Grandpa & Debbie are doing good too. I talk to them every couple of nights. Aunt Beck called yesterday & we had a great chat. Things there are pretty busy but they are well. Forrest was over for 4 nights visiting them. Guess that went great. Mom will be calling him shortly to get another reading done. I can only hope that this 2nd one goes just as well as the 1st one did. I hope you come though. I have so many questions for you! Aunt Shirley is still having pain in her back but finally is getting the help from the doctors that she needs. Great Grammy is still holding on as strong as she can. She has her days like we all do, but she is entitled to them. Aunt Jacqui & Uncle Dick are well. Things are better there. All your other Aunts & Uncles are doing well & all your cousins are all doing good too. Ray Jr. is going to be a Daddy come November. They announced it on facebook a week or so ago. Mom was really happy for them & I know you were as well. Something tells me you will have a hand in this one way or another. I know that you are always watching over us & making sure we are all happy, safe & healthy & it means the world to each & every one of us. Thank you my sweet precious son. Think that is all the updates for now. I am sure there will be more tomorrow or in the next few days.
Mom has a couple daily prayers t catch up on so here they are. April 19~ And my people shall dwell in a peaceable habitation & in sure dwellings & in quiet resting places. O Holy Creator, who hath bound together heaven & earth, let me walk through your kingdom comforted & protected by the warm rays of your love. Let me be healed as I stand basking in the divine light of your presence, where strength & hope & joy are found. Let me sit at the rest in the valley of your peace, surrounded by the fortress of your loving care. Amen.
April 20~ To every thing there is a season & a time to every purpose under the heaven. How certain the seasons are, Lord! How faithfully you usher them in one after the other, each in its assigned order. The spring has come with its rain once again, just as I knew it would. And spring's arrival reminds me that you----the faithful creator----have promised to dwell with those who long to know you, those who search for you & look for your return. Amen.
The evening sky is finally upon us as I am finishing up this letter to you. Soon the sky will be dark & Mom is hoping to look out & see a million stars shining. I hope that your evening is filled with all the things you need to do & want to do. I hope that you get a chance to slow down from all the things you are doing & the places that you are going. If you close your eyes, have the sweetest of dreams & come visit Mom tonight when I lay down to fall asleep. Remember forever that you are my true hero & you are my wind beneath my wings. Continue to fly high & free. Mom knows you are soaring! Good night, Tyler. I love you unconditionally.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is doing alright with all things considered. Today was an ok day for me. I kept busy with doing all kinds of things so that I could just make it through the day without losing it. 34 months ago you left us all here in the physical world. Some days it seems like yesterday & other days it seems like it was much longer than it really is. No matter how the days & nights feel there is not 1 second of 1 minute of 1 hour of 1 day that doesn't go by that you are not thought about. You are & always will be constantly in my heart, mind & soul. Mom misses you so much. So much more than I could ever explain to anyone. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Yesterday, I did something different & I wrote to you on your facebook page. I thought that I would switch it up a bit & then realized that not everyone can get to your account now so I decided to go back to writing to you on here. I know that you don't mind where I write or how many times I write to you as you can see all now & you are right by my side when I am doing your letters & really...that is all that matters to Mom.
Last night I looked to the sky & saw the moon shining bright. I didn't see any stars though. When I saw it, I had the biggest smile on my face & I whispered to you. Did you hear Mom? Did you see me smile? I hope so. Mom is hoping to see the moon & stars shining bright again as today was so sunny & nice. The sky was a beautiful shade of blue & there were no clouds. Mom is hoping for a clear night as well. Be listening out again because no matter what I will be whispering to you as I always do.
Mom went out again today on her own. I did it last week & I did it again today, like I said. It felt great to just get up & go. This time I was so much more confident than last week. I just hopped right into my vehicle & away I went. I ran a few errands & then did a little shopping. I was out for a couple hours. Mom came home & then I got onto my computer & did some job searching & other searches for my CEUs that I need to start working on. I also put my resume out there on a couple more websites. would say that I had a very productive day & did exactly what I set out to do....stayed very busy so my mind would not start to wander & think. That is what I was avoiding but now things are done & it is time to settle down from a long day & relax. This is really when Mom starts to think & remember things. It is tough, Ty. Time is not making it any better. I think that time is making it much worse. I am doing all that I can & the best that I can with the circumstances that I have been left with. I know you see my emotional roller coaster ride of emotions all the time. I can't & won't apologize for them....all I can say is just please continue to be patience with Mom. Help me with the strength that I need to just continue on. That is what I need & ask of you. Thank you so much.
Let's see...updates for you... Spoke to Meme today & she got her new vehicle finally. So happy for her. She got your favorite color...Red! I know you were smiling down when that happened. Her & Bob are doing well. Grandpa & Debbie are doing good too. I talk to them every couple of nights. Aunt Beck called yesterday & we had a great chat. Things there are pretty busy but they are well. Forrest was over for 4 nights visiting them. Guess that went great. Mom will be calling him shortly to get another reading done. I can only hope that this 2nd one goes just as well as the 1st one did. I hope you come though. I have so many questions for you! Aunt Shirley is still having pain in her back but finally is getting the help from the doctors that she needs. Great Grammy is still holding on as strong as she can. She has her days like we all do, but she is entitled to them. Aunt Jacqui & Uncle Dick are well. Things are better there. All your other Aunts & Uncles are doing well & all your cousins are all doing good too. Ray Jr. is going to be a Daddy come November. They announced it on facebook a week or so ago. Mom was really happy for them & I know you were as well. Something tells me you will have a hand in this one way or another. I know that you are always watching over us & making sure we are all happy, safe & healthy & it means the world to each & every one of us. Thank you my sweet precious son. Think that is all the updates for now. I am sure there will be more tomorrow or in the next few days.
Mom has a couple daily prayers t catch up on so here they are. April 19~ And my people shall dwell in a peaceable habitation & in sure dwellings & in quiet resting places. O Holy Creator, who hath bound together heaven & earth, let me walk through your kingdom comforted & protected by the warm rays of your love. Let me be healed as I stand basking in the divine light of your presence, where strength & hope & joy are found. Let me sit at the rest in the valley of your peace, surrounded by the fortress of your loving care. Amen.
April 20~ To every thing there is a season & a time to every purpose under the heaven. How certain the seasons are, Lord! How faithfully you usher them in one after the other, each in its assigned order. The spring has come with its rain once again, just as I knew it would. And spring's arrival reminds me that you----the faithful creator----have promised to dwell with those who long to know you, those who search for you & look for your return. Amen.
The evening sky is finally upon us as I am finishing up this letter to you. Soon the sky will be dark & Mom is hoping to look out & see a million stars shining. I hope that your evening is filled with all the things you need to do & want to do. I hope that you get a chance to slow down from all the things you are doing & the places that you are going. If you close your eyes, have the sweetest of dreams & come visit Mom tonight when I lay down to fall asleep. Remember forever that you are my true hero & you are my wind beneath my wings. Continue to fly high & free. Mom knows you are soaring! Good night, Tyler. I love you unconditionally.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, April 18, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? The weather today has been really nice. Warm in the 70's & sunny with blue skies. Today has been a tough day for Mom. It is one of those days that I just miss you beyond any words could ever say. That is really nothing new but it is so much more intense for some reason. I got many things done today for housework & I even cleaned out my side of the closest. It was dirty but I went through my clothes again & such to see what I could donate. I also updated all my information on Monster.com so that I can start to get some job searches going so I can get out & go back to work. Mom will be doing more of that tomorrow as well. Lots of searching but that is ok. I also need to start doing some looking around for my continuing education credits so that I can keep the certification up that I worked so hard for. Mom is really trying to stay busy, stay focused & better herself. As of today, I also decided to start exercising again & change my diet to a " clean eating " plan. That consists of lots of fish, chicken, fruits, veggies & nuts. I am hoping to loose some of the weight that I have gained in the past year. I know I can do it... it is mind over matter. I know you will be watching over me as well to help kick me in the butt when I need it...lol.
I am so sorry that Mom did not write to you last night. I have no excuses or reasons other than Mark & Mom went out for lunch & ran errands.We got back at 3:30 pm or so & Mom was not feeling all that well. We both had a drink during our meal & I guess mine just did not sit right. I was pretty much down the rest of the afternoon & evening. Mom didn't sleep much last night either but again I am doing ok. Please forgive me for not writing to you. I know you really understand because you see everything but Mom just feels she has to say it.
As far as updates, I don't have any as I did not talk on the phone at all over the weekend. Today I spoke to Auntie Kristina & another friend of mine. Every one seems to be doing just fine. No news is good news in my book. Aunt Beck did text Mom to say that things have been pretty busy but she will be calling me tomorrow to chat. Hope so as I miss her bunches! Hopefully I will have some updates for you in the next couple days.
Mom was pretty sad this afternoon. Did you see that? Auntie Jacqui sent me something over facebook & I started to read it & just lost it. It was about a 2 1/2 year old boy who contracted a virus that left him paralyzed. It happened over night & the doctors are saying that the virus is so rare it is perhaps one out of a million. The doctors named it transverse myelitis. Sound familiar? Immediately after I read this I sent the family a message telling them that their story just hit home & Mom was hurting & brokenhearted about their little boy. I told them about you & that I knew what they were going through. Told them if they needed anything or someone just to talk to they could contact me directly. Oh Ty, I lost it my sweet precious son. This just happened 4 months ago. I can feel the pain all over again & I am just crushed at the thought of another family having to go through what we both did for all those years. Please look after that family. All Mom knows right now is that they are now living in Indiana.
Here is your daily prayer for the last 2 days. April 17~ I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. No matter the worries I have, small or large, you O God, are there ahead of me with promises of help & support that relieve me & free me from getting stuck in the mire of my daily fears. I am grateful. Amen.
April 18~ Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Father, you are the greatest of all peacemakers. You made reconciliation with humanity possible by means of great personal sacrifice yet without compromising the truth. Show me how to follow your example today. Help me not to settle for fake peace---the kind that comes when lies are allowed to prevail for the sake of avoiding conflict. Instead, grant me the courage, grace, & wisdom to work toward real peace, which values all people & fulfills our need for truth & love. Amen.
All caught up once again. The sun is now setting for our evening sky. The sky is clouding up as we are suppose to be getting rain for most of the day tomorrow. Probably not going to see any stars or moon shining bright but I know you are shining so bright for someone or so many people that need it more than Mom tonight. Be listening out as I will be whispering to you as I always do. Please smile & so will Mom. Hope your night is filled with all the things you are needing to do & things that you may want do. Slow down though & close those sweet eyes of yours. Have the best dreams possible & come see Mom tonight in my own dreams when I close my eyes to fall asleep. You are always in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? The weather today has been really nice. Warm in the 70's & sunny with blue skies. Today has been a tough day for Mom. It is one of those days that I just miss you beyond any words could ever say. That is really nothing new but it is so much more intense for some reason. I got many things done today for housework & I even cleaned out my side of the closest. It was dirty but I went through my clothes again & such to see what I could donate. I also updated all my information on Monster.com so that I can start to get some job searches going so I can get out & go back to work. Mom will be doing more of that tomorrow as well. Lots of searching but that is ok. I also need to start doing some looking around for my continuing education credits so that I can keep the certification up that I worked so hard for. Mom is really trying to stay busy, stay focused & better herself. As of today, I also decided to start exercising again & change my diet to a " clean eating " plan. That consists of lots of fish, chicken, fruits, veggies & nuts. I am hoping to loose some of the weight that I have gained in the past year. I know I can do it... it is mind over matter. I know you will be watching over me as well to help kick me in the butt when I need it...lol.
I am so sorry that Mom did not write to you last night. I have no excuses or reasons other than Mark & Mom went out for lunch & ran errands.We got back at 3:30 pm or so & Mom was not feeling all that well. We both had a drink during our meal & I guess mine just did not sit right. I was pretty much down the rest of the afternoon & evening. Mom didn't sleep much last night either but again I am doing ok. Please forgive me for not writing to you. I know you really understand because you see everything but Mom just feels she has to say it.
As far as updates, I don't have any as I did not talk on the phone at all over the weekend. Today I spoke to Auntie Kristina & another friend of mine. Every one seems to be doing just fine. No news is good news in my book. Aunt Beck did text Mom to say that things have been pretty busy but she will be calling me tomorrow to chat. Hope so as I miss her bunches! Hopefully I will have some updates for you in the next couple days.
Mom was pretty sad this afternoon. Did you see that? Auntie Jacqui sent me something over facebook & I started to read it & just lost it. It was about a 2 1/2 year old boy who contracted a virus that left him paralyzed. It happened over night & the doctors are saying that the virus is so rare it is perhaps one out of a million. The doctors named it transverse myelitis. Sound familiar? Immediately after I read this I sent the family a message telling them that their story just hit home & Mom was hurting & brokenhearted about their little boy. I told them about you & that I knew what they were going through. Told them if they needed anything or someone just to talk to they could contact me directly. Oh Ty, I lost it my sweet precious son. This just happened 4 months ago. I can feel the pain all over again & I am just crushed at the thought of another family having to go through what we both did for all those years. Please look after that family. All Mom knows right now is that they are now living in Indiana.
Here is your daily prayer for the last 2 days. April 17~ I sought the Lord, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. No matter the worries I have, small or large, you O God, are there ahead of me with promises of help & support that relieve me & free me from getting stuck in the mire of my daily fears. I am grateful. Amen.
April 18~ Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God. Father, you are the greatest of all peacemakers. You made reconciliation with humanity possible by means of great personal sacrifice yet without compromising the truth. Show me how to follow your example today. Help me not to settle for fake peace---the kind that comes when lies are allowed to prevail for the sake of avoiding conflict. Instead, grant me the courage, grace, & wisdom to work toward real peace, which values all people & fulfills our need for truth & love. Amen.
All caught up once again. The sun is now setting for our evening sky. The sky is clouding up as we are suppose to be getting rain for most of the day tomorrow. Probably not going to see any stars or moon shining bright but I know you are shining so bright for someone or so many people that need it more than Mom tonight. Be listening out as I will be whispering to you as I always do. Please smile & so will Mom. Hope your night is filled with all the things you are needing to do & things that you may want do. Slow down though & close those sweet eyes of yours. Have the best dreams possible & come see Mom tonight in my own dreams when I close my eyes to fall asleep. You are always in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, April 16, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing today on this Saturday early evening? The sun is out here where Mom is & it is 70 degrees & Sunday it is going to be even nicer outside. Oh I am loving the weather & it makes me so happy. Mom is sorry though that you did not get a letter last night. I am afraid that whatever Mark had on Thursday he gave it to me & I was sick almost the whole day yesterday. I did not get out of bed at all. I actually slept for a good part of the day as well. I didn't really think that I would be able to sleep last night but I was wrong. I slept pretty good. Guess my body was just tired. Even though I did not write it doesn't mean that I was not thinking about you because I was & I always do my sweet precious son. Every second of every minute of every day you are n my mind, my heart & my soul. I hope you realize this & never forget it.
So yesterday Mom didn't talk to anyone on the phone. I did however talk to Meme today. She & Bob are well. She gets to go get her new vehicle this week & boy she is happy with that & rightfully so. She has been waiting 3 weeks now so I am so happy for her. I know Mom will chat with Grandpa tomorrow night so I will have more updates for you then. Today was a good day for Mark & I. Think it is what was needed after 2 days of sickness. Haircuts, grocery shopping, & a mall run was what we did. Mark spoiled Mom today at her favorite clothing store. It was a surprise & so much fun. Did you see Mom smile a lot? I hope so. I am looking at your picture right now & smiling at you. What I wouldn't give to see you right in front of me smiling back. I miss you so much. I miss your laugh, your voice, your smile. I miss it all. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Always have & always will. You will forever be my everything.
Tomorrow Mark & Mom have a few things to do around the apartment, then we will be going to breakfast which we never really do unless we are on vacation & then coming back home & relaxing. Mom is planning on doing so painting. So if you have any tips for Mom I will gladly accept them. I found a site where I think I can do a few pictures so I am kind excited to try them out. Mom will make sure to write to you in the evening so I can tell you all about it. I am sure you will be laughing & shaking your head saying " Oh Mom! "
Well I have a couple daily prayers for you so here they are. April 15~ And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God & every living creature of all flesh that is upon the earth. Refocus me, God of love, to embrace & enjoy this child growing so quickly into independence. When growth pains come, send me a rainbow of friends' support, vision & patience to enjoy, although it's sure to rain again. Help me accept storm & sun as balance of nature & of life. Amen.
April 16~ The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ & the love of God & the communion of the Holy Ghost, be with you all. Amen. Like the sun that melts the snow, my soul absorbs the grace that beats in gentle, healing rays from some godly place. Like rain that heals parched earth, my body drinks the love that falls in gently soothing waves from heaven up above. Amen.
All caught up once again. The evening sky will be upon us in about 1 1/2 hours. I think it is going to be a really pretty sunset. The sky is so clear & blue..absolutely no clouds. Mark & Mom will be playing a game of chess maybe & then watching a movie later. I will make sure to look up to the sky. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for my voice. Smile & I will too. Hope your evening is all that you need & want it to be. I know you are busy doing so many wonderful things. I am so proud of you even though I can't see what those " things " are. I know you are giving it your all. Have the sweetest of dreams tonight & come visit Mom if you can. I would love that. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Ty. I love you unconditionally.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing today on this Saturday early evening? The sun is out here where Mom is & it is 70 degrees & Sunday it is going to be even nicer outside. Oh I am loving the weather & it makes me so happy. Mom is sorry though that you did not get a letter last night. I am afraid that whatever Mark had on Thursday he gave it to me & I was sick almost the whole day yesterday. I did not get out of bed at all. I actually slept for a good part of the day as well. I didn't really think that I would be able to sleep last night but I was wrong. I slept pretty good. Guess my body was just tired. Even though I did not write it doesn't mean that I was not thinking about you because I was & I always do my sweet precious son. Every second of every minute of every day you are n my mind, my heart & my soul. I hope you realize this & never forget it.
So yesterday Mom didn't talk to anyone on the phone. I did however talk to Meme today. She & Bob are well. She gets to go get her new vehicle this week & boy she is happy with that & rightfully so. She has been waiting 3 weeks now so I am so happy for her. I know Mom will chat with Grandpa tomorrow night so I will have more updates for you then. Today was a good day for Mark & I. Think it is what was needed after 2 days of sickness. Haircuts, grocery shopping, & a mall run was what we did. Mark spoiled Mom today at her favorite clothing store. It was a surprise & so much fun. Did you see Mom smile a lot? I hope so. I am looking at your picture right now & smiling at you. What I wouldn't give to see you right in front of me smiling back. I miss you so much. I miss your laugh, your voice, your smile. I miss it all. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Always have & always will. You will forever be my everything.
Tomorrow Mark & Mom have a few things to do around the apartment, then we will be going to breakfast which we never really do unless we are on vacation & then coming back home & relaxing. Mom is planning on doing so painting. So if you have any tips for Mom I will gladly accept them. I found a site where I think I can do a few pictures so I am kind excited to try them out. Mom will make sure to write to you in the evening so I can tell you all about it. I am sure you will be laughing & shaking your head saying " Oh Mom! "
Well I have a couple daily prayers for you so here they are. April 15~ And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God & every living creature of all flesh that is upon the earth. Refocus me, God of love, to embrace & enjoy this child growing so quickly into independence. When growth pains come, send me a rainbow of friends' support, vision & patience to enjoy, although it's sure to rain again. Help me accept storm & sun as balance of nature & of life. Amen.
April 16~ The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ & the love of God & the communion of the Holy Ghost, be with you all. Amen. Like the sun that melts the snow, my soul absorbs the grace that beats in gentle, healing rays from some godly place. Like rain that heals parched earth, my body drinks the love that falls in gently soothing waves from heaven up above. Amen.
All caught up once again. The evening sky will be upon us in about 1 1/2 hours. I think it is going to be a really pretty sunset. The sky is so clear & blue..absolutely no clouds. Mark & Mom will be playing a game of chess maybe & then watching a movie later. I will make sure to look up to the sky. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for my voice. Smile & I will too. Hope your evening is all that you need & want it to be. I know you are busy doing so many wonderful things. I am so proud of you even though I can't see what those " things " are. I know you are giving it your all. Have the sweetest of dreams tonight & come visit Mom if you can. I would love that. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Ty. I love you unconditionally.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, April 14, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom has had quite the day so far. I wanted to write to you before I needed to go make dinner. Mom has been taking care of Mark all day as he has been sick. I know that he really is feeling like poop because he never calls out of work. He has been sleeping quite a bit. Made him breakfast & lunch to make sure he is getting food & fluids in his system. Not sure what is going on but I know it is kicking his butt pretty good. Anything you can do for him Mom would appreciate it a great deal. I know Mark would appreciate it as well. Thanks pumpkin. Tonight will be an early night for us both as Mom is pretty tired. The weather today has been cool for temps but the sun has been shining bright & it is wonderful. It makes Mom smile despite everything else that is going on. Hope you are somewhere warm & sunny too. If I know you & I do, I know you are!
Not much is new & I have no real updates for you as you have seen the day that I have had. Maybe tomorrow or through the weekend I will have some for you. Mom does feel pretty bad though. This morning I said some things that I maybe shouldn't have or at least said them in a different way. I know I hurt someone bad. It hurts Mom to think about it right now. I am such an honest person that at times I don't think before I speak. I need to practice that more. I need to really know what I am going to say & how I am going to say it before it just flies out of my mouth. I hope in time that that person can forgive Mom. If not then it is my fault & I will have to live with it. Mom also did another thing today as I was talking to a friend & he was telling me about someone he has been talking to. He mention something & Mom said to be careful...there was a long story behind that all & I didn't think that something was true. Later on, I found out that it was indeed true & I screwed something else up. I did however get in touch with that person & I apologized about it & said that I was very sorry for the whole thing. Mom felt like dirt. I should have never assumed. I have learned a very valuable lesson with that. Maybe Mom needs to just be quiet for a while & not talk to anyone. What do you think? I know you are shaking your head & saying " Oh, Mom " I can hear you now. One day I will learn, right? Honestly, I think I already have.
I have a couple daily prayers to write to you so here they are. April 13~ Then was our mouth filled with laughter & our tongue with singing: then said they among the heathen, the Lord hath done great things for them. Inspired by you, O God, I wisely invest in the future by deciding to chase kites on spring days, to chase balls on playgrounds & to chase laughter rising from a baby's lips like bubbles on the wind rather than to chase dust bunnies beneath beds! Amen.
April 14~ So then faith cometh by hearing & hearing by the word of God. Lord, I want my thoughts to be like your thoughts. I want to discern what you discern & have the insight you have into all that happens in the world. I know that can never really be, Lord, but if I if I am open to your Spirit at all times, perhaps I can construe your hopes now & then. May my mind never be so cluttered that I fail to receive a message you are trying to share with me, Lord. Amen.
All caught up yet again. It sure feels great! Mom hates when I don't write to you as I don't feel as close to you. I know that may sound silly to some & that is ok but to Mom this is a way to continue to heal from my grieving of losing you. Maybe someday I won't feel the guilt as much as I still do. I am not sure though. The sun will be setting in the next couple of hours. I am sure it will be pretty as the day was just so beautiful. Sunsets always remind me of paintings that you did. It makes me smile. Mom hopes to see some stars & the moon tonight. I will be looking later & whispering to you. Be listening out for my voice. Smile & I will too. Mom hopes your night will be all that you need to do & perhaps like to do. May it be filled with peace & love as well. Rest if you can, close your eyes & have the sweetest of dreams. Come visit m tonight if you can when Mom falls asleep. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my ultimate hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom has had quite the day so far. I wanted to write to you before I needed to go make dinner. Mom has been taking care of Mark all day as he has been sick. I know that he really is feeling like poop because he never calls out of work. He has been sleeping quite a bit. Made him breakfast & lunch to make sure he is getting food & fluids in his system. Not sure what is going on but I know it is kicking his butt pretty good. Anything you can do for him Mom would appreciate it a great deal. I know Mark would appreciate it as well. Thanks pumpkin. Tonight will be an early night for us both as Mom is pretty tired. The weather today has been cool for temps but the sun has been shining bright & it is wonderful. It makes Mom smile despite everything else that is going on. Hope you are somewhere warm & sunny too. If I know you & I do, I know you are!
Not much is new & I have no real updates for you as you have seen the day that I have had. Maybe tomorrow or through the weekend I will have some for you. Mom does feel pretty bad though. This morning I said some things that I maybe shouldn't have or at least said them in a different way. I know I hurt someone bad. It hurts Mom to think about it right now. I am such an honest person that at times I don't think before I speak. I need to practice that more. I need to really know what I am going to say & how I am going to say it before it just flies out of my mouth. I hope in time that that person can forgive Mom. If not then it is my fault & I will have to live with it. Mom also did another thing today as I was talking to a friend & he was telling me about someone he has been talking to. He mention something & Mom said to be careful...there was a long story behind that all & I didn't think that something was true. Later on, I found out that it was indeed true & I screwed something else up. I did however get in touch with that person & I apologized about it & said that I was very sorry for the whole thing. Mom felt like dirt. I should have never assumed. I have learned a very valuable lesson with that. Maybe Mom needs to just be quiet for a while & not talk to anyone. What do you think? I know you are shaking your head & saying " Oh, Mom " I can hear you now. One day I will learn, right? Honestly, I think I already have.
I have a couple daily prayers to write to you so here they are. April 13~ Then was our mouth filled with laughter & our tongue with singing: then said they among the heathen, the Lord hath done great things for them. Inspired by you, O God, I wisely invest in the future by deciding to chase kites on spring days, to chase balls on playgrounds & to chase laughter rising from a baby's lips like bubbles on the wind rather than to chase dust bunnies beneath beds! Amen.
April 14~ So then faith cometh by hearing & hearing by the word of God. Lord, I want my thoughts to be like your thoughts. I want to discern what you discern & have the insight you have into all that happens in the world. I know that can never really be, Lord, but if I if I am open to your Spirit at all times, perhaps I can construe your hopes now & then. May my mind never be so cluttered that I fail to receive a message you are trying to share with me, Lord. Amen.
All caught up yet again. It sure feels great! Mom hates when I don't write to you as I don't feel as close to you. I know that may sound silly to some & that is ok but to Mom this is a way to continue to heal from my grieving of losing you. Maybe someday I won't feel the guilt as much as I still do. I am not sure though. The sun will be setting in the next couple of hours. I am sure it will be pretty as the day was just so beautiful. Sunsets always remind me of paintings that you did. It makes me smile. Mom hopes to see some stars & the moon tonight. I will be looking later & whispering to you. Be listening out for my voice. Smile & I will too. Mom hopes your night will be all that you need to do & perhaps like to do. May it be filled with peace & love as well. Rest if you can, close your eyes & have the sweetest of dreams. Come visit m tonight if you can when Mom falls asleep. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my ultimate hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! Hope you are doing well on this Tuesday evening. Mom has had a pretty busy day today & I am so tired but I wanted to write to you even if it is a short letter tonight. Mom wanted to say thank you for watching over me today as I went venturing out on my own. Doesn't sound like a very big deal but it is to me when you live in a city like we do. Mom called on you to be with me during my outing & I know that you were there as I just felt a sense of peace over me. I can't thank you enough. The rest of Mom's day was consisting of being on the phone talking to several folks. I did also talk to Meme & Grandpa too. All is well with them but you already know that. Hopefully Mom will chat with Aunt Beck tomorrow at some point.
I don't really have any updates to give you but I am sure I will as the week draws closer to an end. If you don't mind I will write to you the daily prayer for tonight on tomorrows letter as well. My head is hurting & I am having a hard time staying awake right now. Guess it was all that fresh air & no sleep last night that is doing it to me. Mom hopes that you have a wonderful peaceful night doing all the thing you need & want to do. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit Mom in my own dreams tonight. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Hope to see the stars & moon shining bright tonight. If not no worries as Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice. Smile & I will too. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & Mom's wind beneath my wings. Good night, Ty. I will write more to you tomorrow.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! Hope you are doing well on this Tuesday evening. Mom has had a pretty busy day today & I am so tired but I wanted to write to you even if it is a short letter tonight. Mom wanted to say thank you for watching over me today as I went venturing out on my own. Doesn't sound like a very big deal but it is to me when you live in a city like we do. Mom called on you to be with me during my outing & I know that you were there as I just felt a sense of peace over me. I can't thank you enough. The rest of Mom's day was consisting of being on the phone talking to several folks. I did also talk to Meme & Grandpa too. All is well with them but you already know that. Hopefully Mom will chat with Aunt Beck tomorrow at some point.
I don't really have any updates to give you but I am sure I will as the week draws closer to an end. If you don't mind I will write to you the daily prayer for tonight on tomorrows letter as well. My head is hurting & I am having a hard time staying awake right now. Guess it was all that fresh air & no sleep last night that is doing it to me. Mom hopes that you have a wonderful peaceful night doing all the thing you need & want to do. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit Mom in my own dreams tonight. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Hope to see the stars & moon shining bright tonight. If not no worries as Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice. Smile & I will too. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & Mom's wind beneath my wings. Good night, Ty. I will write more to you tomorrow.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Tuesday, April 12, 2016
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