Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! Happy New Years Eve to you in heaven. Today is the last day of 2017. It is hard to believe that time is just going right by. Mom has been up since the crack of dawn trying to get things ready for our guests tonight. I still have a lot to do but I wanted to take a quick break & write to you. I have about 2 hours before Marion & Charlie show up & I am not even ready yet. I will be doing that after I write to you. 
 The sun is shining & it is a cold day out there but we did not get the 2 1/2 feet of snow that they were projecting last week. Mom is pretty thankful for that! New Years is my favorite holiday as you know & it is already starting off with a bang & not in a good way. Things were going smoothly this morning. I was busy getting stuff together while Mark was getting ready. I mention something to him & I guess he did not like what I had to say & he just walked out of the apartment & took off. Never said anything... he just left. When I realized what happened, I said to myself " well this is not starting off to be a good last day of the year. " I hope it gets better or this is going to be miserable for everyone later on. I would rather spare everyone the bullsh*t but it is too late to cancel on everyone. Guess we share see how it goes. No promises though. Anyways......
 Last night Mom did not stop doing things until after 8 pm. When I was finally finished I decided to crawl in bed & watch my very last Christmas movie that I taped. It was cute. That finished at 10 pm & I decided to just go to bed knowing that today was going to be a very long day indeed. Mom woke up a few times during the night but I think I slept good. woke up with a sore throat though. Mark said I snored all night long. I can believe it as I have been so worn out these last several days. My throat is better now. I have been drinking a lot of water to help. Mom also got the chance to chat with Meme & Aunt Shirley. Meme & Bob are good. Bob had a good doctors appointment the other day. All his levels are really good. That is a plus. Meme will be going back to work on Tuesday after having 14 days off. I wish she would just retire. She needs to! Aunt Shirley is doing okay. Richard had a good doctors appointment as well. Aunt Shirley, not so much. She has to go see a specialist about her eye. She has bleeding in the back of the right eye which is causing her to go blind. That was sad to hear. I hope her upcoming appointment is good. Great Grammy is doing well. She is still as feisty as ever! Mom did not get the chance to chat with Grandpa but I know that he is working today & him & Debbie are going out tonight to celebrate the New Year. I will chat with them tomorrow through. I will get in touch with everyone this week as the holidays are all behind us & we can get back to a somewhat normal routine. Mark will be working & I will be hitting the books big time! Mom is going to be strict with herself. More study time & less time on social media that is for sure. I want to graduate by May at least! That is a goal I am setting! That is all that I have for you today I am afraid but here is a saying for the day:
 Choose to Live in Joy: Life goes by in the blink of an eye. It's too short to live upset, angry, resentful or ungrateful. If you look for the good, you'll find it. Choose to be happy, to be at peace. Decide that each day is going to be a great day & grab each moment & make the best of it. Refuse to let negative thoughts take root in your mind & refuse to let negative people & situations drag you down. Trust your journey & know that you if you make a mistake, it's okay. See it as a lesson learned & keep moving forward. spend less time worrying & more time being grateful for those who love you & all of life's goodness. Choose to live in joy! 
 Here is the prayer for the day as well:
 The Other Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the serenity to stop beating myself for not doing things perfectly, the courage to forgive myself because I'm working on doing better & the wisdom to know that you already love me just the way I am. Amen. 
 Mom needs to get going as time is ticking & I still have so much left to do. Mom is hoping that tonight you will be here celebrating with us. Send me a sign if you can my sweet precious son. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You will forever be my hero & the wind beneath my winds. You live on in my heart, mind, body & soul. Hope tonight you will be with me as I go to bed. Have fun & hope all you angels celebrate like we do here. Mom will be back tomorrow with another letter to you. It will be a new year & a brand new beginning. Mom will be having new pictures for you as it will be January 1st. Hope you will like them! Until tomorrow.... later tonight.... good night & sweet dreams. I will whisper to you at midnight & wish you a Happy New Year in heaven! Smile when you hear my voice & I will smile back to you. You are my shining star! You have my heart & I love you unconditionally.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!