Dear Tyler,

Hello my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday afternoon? Mom is doing so much better today. I was so tired yesterday due to all the lack of sleep I was getting from being awake with Snickers because of the terrible storms that we were having. I was like a walking zombie. My head was in a fog and I just couldn't do anything. I went to bed at 9:30 pm and woke at 6 am feeling much better. I did somethings around the house today and even did my workout. I have more things to do but it can wait until tomorrow when Mark is at the office working!
 The last few days I have been feeling so off my game. I have little patience and I loose my temper when it comes to Max. I am trying really hard to not do this but I get so frustrated and don't know what to do anymore. I know it is not his fault it is because he is old, but when I am constantly up all night and I don't get any sleep because of it I tend to be very cranky and short tempered with everyone. I hate this feeling and I want things to change but I just don't know how to. I found myself curled up in a ball this morning looking out the window and having myself a good cry. I prayed for help. I prayed for you to help me. I need it and I want it. 
 I have decided to go to bed early now so that I can get up earlier. Maybe it will help me out. I don't know but it is worth the shot to see if things will change. Please be with Mom as I try to make things better. Thank you Tyler.
 Aunt Shirley took a couple pictures for Mom so that I could see that she put a cross with a yellow ribbon, a yellow rose, and a green pinwheel at your resting place. I thought that was so sweet of her and I know you were there smiling as she was doing this and talking to you. I will be in NH in 13 days and I will be going to visit you every day I am there. I am going to be working very hard to get you a " marker " with your name on it until I can get you flat stone and bench. Every time Mark and I start to save money for this something else comes up and we have to use it. It just isn't fair to you. I want the best for you. Always did and always will. You deserve it. You deserve a wonderful resting place so that family & friends can visit you. I promise this is top priority for me and this will be taken care of soon. Please forgive Mom for the time it is taken Mark & I.
 Thank you for the stars shining brightly the other evening. I was surprised because I didn't think I would see any due to the rain storms we had been having. I whispered to you so I hope you could hear me. I will look again tonight and see if I can see the stars. Regardless, I will whisper to you. 
 Have a peaceful and restful evening my precious son. I miss you so much and love you to the moon & back. Sweet dreams, Tyler. Forever in my heart, mind & soul....
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!