Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Monday afternoon? Again, I hope where you are it is warm, sunny, & blue skies. The weather again here is just awful & so depressing. We are in the middle of another snow storm here & we have already got 18' of snow & we are expected to get another 8' or so. The snow can stop anytime now. I am just so sick of it & the winter already. In the last 3 weeks we have gotten 3 major snow storms that have dumped over 7 feet of snow on us. It is just ridiculous! I really miss seeing the sun shine almost all the time like it does in Texas. I don't want to say I hate it here where we are but it is pretty dang close. After 3 years I am not used to it at all & not sure I ever will get used to it again. Trying to keep positive....
 This weekend we had Marion & Charlie over for a visit. It was Charlie's birthday & we took them to the Paint Bar where we had so much fun. It was really neat. We all painted a picture of " Starry Night... Eiffel Tower. " It was a class of 60 people & it was neat to see that all the paintings were just so different. First time going but definitely will not be the last. I hope you were there with Mom. I hope that you got to see what we did & what the class was like. I know if you were here with us you would have loved it. Your painting would have come out so amazing. I want to try to take the techniques that we learned & paint another picture & see how it comes out. Just wanting to do a different color pallet. I think that would be interesting & fun. Saturday night we came back to the apartment & I made homemade lasagna & strawberry truffle. We played cards until the wee hours of the morning. We had a lot of laughs & it was the 1st time Mom has had fun in a very long time. Sunday we took them to the Cheesecake Factory for lunch. They had to leave around 2 pm or so because it was already starting to snow. It was wonderful to have company & sad to see them leave. I know they will be coming down here quite often to visit so that makes me happy. I hope that other family & friends come as well. During the week is so lonely as Mark works very long hours so I look forward to the weekends. Mom & Mark hope to visit NH at least 1 time during each month. That way we can see our family & friends. 
 Spoke to Meme & I guess Bob is still going to be scheduled for his heart surgery on February 16th. I hope that things go really well & there is a miracle for him. I hope this one does the trick so that Bob can start feeling better & feeling good about himself again. I know it will help out with Meme too. I know that you will be with them during this difficult time. I thank you so much for that, Tyler. It means the world to Mom.
 I have about 5 daily prayers to write to you so I want to start them know. February 5~ Grace to you & peace from God our Father & the Lord Jesus Christ. Lord in heaven, your grace is given to me as my birthright in Jesus Christ. Nevertheless, I find myself hardening my heart against others, thinking that they do not " deserve " my kindness or my time. What a hypocrite I am! Nothing I have ever done has made me worthy of your sacrifice to me--the one who is ever willing to judge others. Please forgive me for my pride, & help me to open myself to all my Christian brothers & sisters. I ask in the holy name of Jesus Christ. Amen.
 February 6~The Lord gives wisdom;from his mouth come knowledge & understanding. God, I admit that there are many times in my day that I forget to focus on what I have. I am so consumed with what I want & need that I often lose track of the amazing & abundant blessings you have already given me. Please help me shift my focus back to the good things that surround me, no matter how simple they might be. Too often I find myself worrying about my life, wanting to do more, & achieve more & have more, & then I am without peace. Guide me back to that place within where I am aware of all the treasures you have placed before me. May you know that a wisdom & a love transcend the things you will see & touch today. 
 February 7~ God did not give us a spirit of cowardice, but rather a spirit of power, & of love & of self-discipline. Supreme Lord of the universe, today I stand strong & proclaim your glory. My faith in you makes me strong, & I can't help but share my trust & love for you with others. You are the sovereign Lord, & all that you declare shall come to pass. Nothing can withstand your will, & I'm thankful to align myself with you. I'm in awe of your power & glory & my heart is full of your Holy Spirit. When I read your Word, I'm reassured of your promises to me. I want nothing more than to live as a follower of Christ until the end of my days. God gives us faith as a means of getting in touch with his love.
 February 8~ Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself & God our Father; who loved us & through grace gave us eternal comfort & good hope, comfort your hearts. My Lord, I come across so many people with misguided hopes. Their hopes are in their ability to make a lot of money, their athletic skills, or their academic acumen. Maybe their hopes are in their husbands, their wives, or even in their children through which they vicariously pursue their lost dreams. As they move from one disappointment to the next, Lord, reach out to show them that they are the only sure place for them to put their hopes is in you. Thank you, Lord. God will either give you what you ask, or something far better.
 February 9~ The human mind plans the way, but the Lord directs the steps. Dear Lord, all my plans have been tossed in the air like so many grains of rice, never to be gathered or ordered again. I thought I had it all figured out, but now I find that I am powerless. You remind me once again that I'm not in control & that the only sure thing is you. I'm scared, but I know that I can regain my footing. Please help me find the right path---not the path of my choosing but the path you have planned for me. Turn over your problems to God, & he will orchestrate the best outcome. 
 Ok, Tyler, I have caught up on the daily prayers again. I am so sorry that I sometimes don't write as often as I like. The last couple months, as you know, have been difficult for Mom. I am hoping that things will start to get better & I will get back into a routine that works for Mom. I know I don't have to apologize to you as you see everything, but I want to. It means a lot to me to have you understand. Each day is a new day & from here on out I am going to make the most of it & I am going to make myself proud, & be happy as I can be. I need that in my life. I need the positive things & not the negative things anymore. I am drained from everything that I have gone through in the past 8 weeks. I just want things to be simple again & I want things to be simple again & not stressful. I can't take it anymore. I am getting too old for that. Walk with me Tyler & help me out. I need you with me & by my side. Thank you pumpkin. I love you so much. Too the moon & back & all the way around the world. 
 I know I will not be seeing the sun & moon the next couple nights because of this nasty weather but I know that you are shining brightly wherever you may be. I will whisper to you as I always do. I hope you hear me nightly. I hope this evening will be all that you need & want it to be for yourself & all the other Angels. I wish you sweet dreams tonight. I hope to see you in mine as well. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. I miss you pumpkin & I love you like crazy....
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!