Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! Happy Halloween to you in Heaven. Mom is hoping that you are somewhere tonight watching all the kiddos trick or treating. I know you enjoyed it so much as today is your favorite holiday. Mom's day has not been all that great as you have been seeing. I woke up today & felt like poop. Not sure why. I do know that I have not been sleeping very well so that might have a lot to do with it. I had my aroma therapy pillow on my face & neck for most of the day today. I was laying on the couch & I actually fell asleep for a little bit. Mom is now doing somewhat better. I had dinner & I have been drinking water to stay hydrated. Please be with me, I need you. Thank you. 
 Tonight was a bummer for Mark & Mom... we got costumes & everything plus lots of candy for the kids & we found out that no kids do trick or treating here. We were told a few weeks ago that they did so we thought we would have fun with it. It was disappointing to us but oh well. You will be really proud of Mom... I am watching the Halloween movies. He still scares me but hey it is Halloween, right? I can hear you say " My mom is growing up. "..lol! 
 Spoke to Meme this afternoon. She is doing well. Said it was a quiet day there too. I will have more updates for you tomorrow as I will chat with everyone else. Need to do some errands but it won't take me too long. Should be another quiet day for all. Football day too so we never stay out late. Mom will also write out the daily prayers to you then. I have a few pictures that I want to post tonight so this letter will not be long.
 The evening sky is completely upon us. It is suppose to be a full moon tonight but I am not seeing it right now or any stars for that matter. Maybe later. Mom will be whispering to you as I always do so hope you will be listening out for me. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Hope you have a wonderful night tonight. Mom is sure that you are with our family, Ron, Rickie, Amy, Wendy, Holly & many others having fun & celebrating. If I know you, you are doing some tricking yourself & doing some scares. Have fun doing all that you need & want to. Rest for a bit & have sweet dreams. Hope to see you in my own dreams tonight. Please help Mom to get some much needed sleep. Thanks Ty. Please remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Friday night? I am sure that you are having fun as it is all Hallow's Eve. Mom, as you have been seeing all day has been very emotional. Lots of talking to you, singing you a very special song & many tears shed today. I am just having a hard time knowing that tomorrow is Halloween & it was your favorite time of the year. I miss this time with you along with every thing else. Mom knows it is wrong, but I can't help but think & feel that we both were robbed of this & so much more. Please help Mom to deal with this so that I don't feel the way that I do. I dislike the feeling so much. Thank you. 
 Mom is sorry that I missed writing to you but honestly, the day just got the best of me. I made homemade banana bread, did some laundry & housework & then I started to go online to do some studying & again the phone got the best of Mom & I ended up talking on the phone with Auntie Kristina for the most part. Needed to make dinner & then I didn't even do that... we ordered pizza. Mark & Mom were suppose to go to a Halloween party were we live but we found out it was for parents that had little kids. Mom was bummed but I understood. I ended up chatting with Grandpa for a bit & then watch tv. After all that Mom was just so tired so I went to bed. 
 Grandpa & Debbie are doing well. I also got to speak with Meme today. She seemed like she was doing well. Bob too. She was saying that she was disappointed because her VW bug has crapped out. She loves this car so hopefully things will work out & she will be able to get it fixed. I know that you are watching over us all & making sure we are all healthy & well. Thank you so much my sweet precious son. It makes us feel so happy, protected & proud.
 Have a couple daily prayers for you so here they are. October 29~ Then the disciples, every man according to his ability, determined to send relief unto the brethren which dwelt in Judaea. Father, It's easy to say, " Let me know if there's anything I can do. " But how much better to peer closer, assess the situation to find what needs doing, & the simply do it. Help me look into a friend's needs instead of waiting to be asked. Help me replace the words I utter so glibly with actions that might matter even more. Amen.
 October 30~ Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good works & glorify your Father which is in heaven. Some prayers are best left unfinished, God of abundance, & this will be an ongoing conversation between us. Each day I discover new gifts you offer me, & the list of reasons to be thankful grows. As I accept your gifts & live with them thankfully, guide me to become a person who shares with others so that they, too, can live abundantly. May someone, somewhere, someday say of me, " I am thankful to have this person in my life. " Amen.
 All caught up once again. The evening sky is fully upon us. The moon is suppose to be almost full tonight as Halloween night it will be full. I am hoping to see it shining bright & also some stars in the sky. No matter what I will be whispering to you as I do each & every night. Be listening out for my voice tonight. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. 
 Mom hopes that tonight is all you want & need it to be & to do. Rest if you can, close those beautiful eyes of yours & have sweet dreams. Hope to see you in my dreams tonight as well when I lay my head to go to sleep. Please be with Mom tonight as I need you, just like I do all the time. Remember that you are in my heart, mind & soul...forever!
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Hope that it is warm & sunny where you are because it is not here where Mom is. It is quite the opposite. It is dark, cold & heavy rain. Just a yucky day all around for weather. My day has been a little better. Had to contact my instructor again for more help. I am getting there but still am unsure of some things. Hopefully I will be able to get this done by tomorrow & I can start on my last lesson. It would be nice. Other than that it has been quite quiet. Mark is working really late tonight. He has been pulling some long hours the last couple of days. Hopefully tomorrow won't be as bad as Friday will be for him. 
 Mom didn't talk to anyone last night either so I have no new updates for you. maybe tonight I will chat with Grandpa & Meme to see how they are doing. Tomorrow I will be writing to you in the morning because I will be studying all day & then we have a little Halloween party to go to here in our complex at night. It should be fun... I hope it will be. It will be nice to meet new neighbors & mingle a little bit. Mom & Mark are going as Mickey & Minnie Mouse. We thought it would be cute. I will take some pictures & post them on here for you so you can laugh your sweet laugh that I miss so much.
 The evening sky will be here upon us earlier than normal due to the rainy weather. I know I won't see any stars or moon shining bright but that does not matter to Mom. I will still whisper to you as I always do. Hope you will be listening out for my voice. Hope it makes you smile...that big Cheshire grin that I love & also miss so much. Please watch over Mark, our family & friends & Mom. Thank you. I know you must be busy doing all the new things you have to & learning all kinds of stuff, but it is just a relief knowing that you are everywhere watching over & protecting us all. Thank you my sweet precious son. It means the world to Mom.
 I also have another request for you to help if you can. One of Mom's friends is sick. He is battling MRSA in his foot & has been on & off for the last 8 years. I guess it is getting worse & he is now facing losing his job because of it. Where he lives he can't just get a " doctors note " and be done with it. I guess that state is a " right to work " & is pretty strict. he can't take the family leave act either due to him not being there for a year yet. he is going to try SSI but he knows that those types of things take a while to get if at all. He is the sole provider for his wife & family. Anything that you might be able to do would be great. Him & I talk about you all the time. He is a sweetheart. You would have gotten along with him, well except for the fact that he is a Cowboy fan like Mom...lol. Thanks Ty!
 here is your daily prayer for today. October 28~ I have blotted out, as a thick cloud, thy transgressions & as a cloud, thy sins: return unto me; for I have redeemed thee. Tossing leaves onto a fire, we name them as regrets & failures from which we choose to be free. We trust you to redeem even these, our dearest moments. They, like autumn leaves, can make the brightest blaze. Stir new possibilities into life from the embers; fan the sparks of dreams so that we may become one with your purpose for us. It is the root from which we, leaf & human life, begin. Amen.
 Mom hopes your night is peaceful & restful for you. May you have sweet dreams tonight & may Mom see you in my own when I go to sleep. I miss you so much. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Remember that!
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

PS Make sure to go wish Elizabeth Ann ( Denise's daughter ) & your sweet friend Megan McPherson a Happy Birthday...as today is both their special days  = ]

Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Tuesday night? Mom has had a little better day than yesterday but not by much. I know that you hear, see & know all now so I know you know what I am talking about. No need to go into details for you. The whole thing just sucks & hurts. I am so tired of hearing so many different things & then people say " oh I never said that. " It is all BS & I am so done with it all. I know what people say to me & I remember it very well. I am sick of hearing that I don't know what I am talking about. It is not my fault & some are going to find out really hard that they will loose at this with me. I know that you will be with me during these times & that is all that matters to Mom. 
 The weather today was so nice. It was partly sunny & in the 50's. Not the best but it could be a lot worse during this time of the year. Can't believe that it will be Halloween in 4 days. Guess it will be interesting as it is also a full moon that night...lol! This will be the 1st year in 4 that we will get the chance to hand out candy directly to the kids. Hope we get some! Mom misses taking you out. It was always so cold & I remember one time it was snowing. Ugh! I smile at the thought of the costumes that you had. Do you remember them all? You were a pumpkin, a fire dog, a dragon, TMNT, power ranger 2 years in a row, a pirate, a vampire, red M&M, Jack Skellington & also Jig Saw from the Saw movies. I think I got most of them. That was at least 11 years worth. Pretty good memory huh? 
 No updates for you tonight. I only spoke to my instructor for my college today for awhile. This lesson that I am doing is brutal & Mom is having a hard time with it. I need to contact them again tomorrow as well as I am still having a hard time. One lesson after this one & I take my final exam. Wish me luck! 
 Please watch over us all. Mom really needs you & so does the rest of the family. Mom did chat with Megan today online. She is having a difficult time with some family members & her little boy is having a hard time. I know you watch over them all but if you can help her out in any way that would be great. I am sure she would appreciate it a great deal. Soothe her son so that he gets sleep & so does she. It is mostly her taking care of him because her BF works a lot of hours. She is tired. Mom knows how that feels. It is hard. I always said that parenting needs to come with a book of instructions. You learn as you go as a 1st time parent. You make mistakes along the way but you correct them so they don't happen again. Lord knows, & so don't you now that I made my share of them through the years. I hope that no matter what I did you proud. I tried to be the best that I could be & know how to be a good Mom to you. You were my world & you always will be. I love you so much my sweet precious son. Unconditional...forever! 
 Here is your daily prayer for tonight. October 27~ Many O Lord my God, are thy wonderful works which thou hast done, & thy thoughts which are to us--- word: they cannot be reckoned up in order unto thee: if I would declare & speak of them, they are more than can be numbered. Lord, speak to me through these pages. let me hear your gentle words. Come whispering through the ages & thundering through the world. Teach me how to please you, Show me how to live. Inspire me to praise you. For all the love you give. Amen.
 The evening sky is upon us now. Hope the stars will be out night along with the moon. If not, it doesn't really matter because I will be whispering to you as i always do. Be listening out for Mom. I hope that your night is all you want & need it to be. Get some rest & have the sweetest of dreams. Hope to see you in my own tonight too. I miss you, Tyler. I love you.
 You are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Monday evening? Hope that you are happy as can be & that it is sunny & warm. The weather here today was pretty nice. The sun was shining & it was 50 degrees outside. Pretty much a nice fall day. Mom wishes that her attitude was matching the day, but it is the complete opposite I am afraid. Mom is just so angry right now I could scream but it just wouldn't do any good. Had mark contact the place where his vehicle is to see what the status is on it & they said they would call him back...they never did. At 5 pm, I had Mark call them again & they said they finally located an engine. Mark asked if the truck would be done by Friday & the gentlemen said that would not happen.The engine is not in the state we are in & it will take a couple days to get it in & then a couple days for them to do all the work. It is upsetting to me because Denise's Mom's wake is Friday night & the funeral is on Saturday. The shitty part about this whole thing is that Mark is working Friday night instead of the day time like usual. He doesn't go into work until 2 pm & won't get home until later that night. I am angry, upset & really just plain pissed off at this point. I wanted to be there to support her & her family like she was there for me when you passed. This is not going to happen now. I will have to get in touch with her to let her know now. Just my luck that I have.....
 Spoke to Grandpa last night. Things are well with them. Spoke to Meme today & they are doing well too. I also got the chance to finally speak to Aunt Beck. It was good to catch up on things. She was saying that Bean was doing good too.Mom is so glad to hear that everyone is doing the best they can be at this point & time. I credit some of this to you, Ty. Mom knows that you watch out for us all. You always make sure that we are safe. Thank you so much for that. Mark & Mom also skyped with Tubal & Karen last night. They seemed much better then they were a few weeks ago. They were more alert, more talkative & generally in much better shape then before. That was a nice surprise. We were getting worried about them both, with them being so sick for so long. Think that is all for the updates that I have for you today.
 Here is your daily prayer. October 26~ Remembering without ceasing your work of faith, & labour of love & patience of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ, in the sight of God & our Father. Hope says, " No matter how many times I fall, I will stand & start again. " For a person of hope is not one who never falls, but one who picks herself up one more time than she falls. Jesus, teach me to place my hope in you. Amen.
 Mom really likes this prayer for today. I hope that you continue to like the daily prayers that I write to you. I really wish that Mom had found these books so much sooner so that we could have read the prayer nightly & the talked about the meaning or our feelings together. The little things that I am always saying that I miss... this is just one of the trillion. It hurts every day not having you here with me, with us all. I try to be brave for the most part. On the outside it looks that way to others, nut in the inside it is a whole different story. I just miss you my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
 Mom hopes that you have a restful & peaceful evening tonight. May you get to do all that you need & want to. Hope you have sweet dreams & I get the chance to see you in my own tonight. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Sunday evening? Mom has had a pretty off day. Last night I really didn't sleep all that much. My head & eye still hurt like crazy. Think I fell asleep around 2 am & then I was up at 7 am. As you can imagine, Mom is pretty tired. After getting ready this morning, I got some sad news. Denise messaged Mom to let me know that her Mom passed away yesterday afternoon around 4:30 pm. I know the last few weeks have been quite tough for her & she was just placed into hospice the last couple weeks. She was a tough cookie & she tried her hardest to beat the cancer that she had. She was a wonderful lady that will definitely be missed by many. If you see her, tell " Tattoo Momma " that she was a hero to so many & that all were proud of the fight that she fought for the time that she did. Give her hugs from us all. Thanks Ty. She deserved to get her wings just like you did. Mom is heartbroken for her family that have to grieve the loss of their loved one but Mom is happy for Betty as she is no longer suffering & she will be at peace now. 
 The rest of Mom's day was ok. The weather was rainy, cold & overcast again. It is playing such havoc on Mom though. It is quite painful. Mark & I went & did grocery shopping & went to a few more stores to start looking for Christmas ideas. Before you know it it will be here. Think someone said 9 weeks until then. Hard to believe it will be another year, another year without you. Mom did pick up another ornament for you, like I did last year. I will bring it up to you when I come in a couple weeks. Last years was green & this years is red. Mom will do this every year for you. Hope that it will make you smile. We want to put the Jack bust down there as well but not sure if we will be able to as the ground may be too cold. If so, we will do it in the spring. I will keep it here for it to be safe for the time being. 
 No new updates as Mom really has not spoken to anyone in the last 3 days. I really need to call Aunt Beck to see how they are doing. Maybe I will in a couple minutes. We have a skye call with Tubal & Karen in 30 minutes. We do this every other week to stay in touch. It is nice. We enjoy it & we think they do too. 
 Mom has a couple daily prayers for you so here they are. October 24~ We toss & turn, God of nightmare peace, making lists of " must do " & " should have done " & wind up feeling unequal to the tasks & sleep deprived to boot. Bless us with deep sleep & dreams that reveal us as you see us: beloved, worthy, capable. At dawn, help us see possibilities on our lists. Each time we yawn today, Lord----for it was a short night----we'll breathe in your restorative presence & exhale worries. Tonight we'll sleep like the sheep of your pasture, for we lie down & rise up in your care, restored, renewed & rested. Amen.
 October 25~ Today, I want to spend time with you, Renewing Spirit. In fact, I'd like to spend the whole day just being in your presence. For this one day I will not worry about the work I have to do or the goals I want to accomplish. I will pull back & simply listen for your guidance. I'm willing to change my life in order to fit your perfect will, & I ask that you begin that work in my heart, even now. I'll let go of personal ambition, for now. I'll loosen my grip on the things I've wanted to accomplish & the recognition I've craved for so long, All of this I give over to you. I'm content to be a servant for now, quiet & unnoticed, if that is what you desire. I'm even willing to be misunderstood, if you will only respond to my sincere prayer for a renewed heart. Thank you. I need you so much. Amen.
 All caught up for you, yet again. The evening sky is upon us in full now. The sky is dark & the moon & stars are not out at this time. Maybe later as the sky was trying to clear up a couple hours ago. No matter what, Mom will whisper to you like I do every night. Hope you listen to me talking to you. Hope you smile when you hear my voice. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. I love you unconditional. Always have & always will. Please continue to watch over Mom, Mark & our family & friends. Thank you. Means the world to Mom. May your night be all you want & need it to be. Sweet dreams & hope to see you in my own tonight too. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Saturday night? Mom really hopes you are spending your time where it is sunny & warm. It is just the opposite here where I am. Today was only 47 degrees, cold, overcast, cloudy & you could see your breath...ugh! Not ready for this kind of weather at all. Makes me so sad to know that winter sure is coming & fast. Mom & Mark had a  fun day doing some shopping for things we needed & we went out for pizza. We had a date day which was much needed. Tomorrow we will be going grocery shopping & relaxing for the rest of the day, watching football & having a nice Sunday dinner. Right now, Mom is kinda feeling like poop. My left side of my face is hurting me & I am in pain. Just took some Tylenol & hope it starts working. My letter to you will not be long at all due to my pain, but I did want to write to you just the same. Mom misses you & loves you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. 
 I promise to write to you tomorrow & write the daily prayers to you as well. Not sure if I will see the stars & moon tonight as the sky was so cloudy but it doesn't matter as Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Please watch over us, Ty. Mom needs you so much. Continue to fly high & fly free. May your night be all that you need & want. Rest a bit if you can & Mom wants you to have sweet dreams. Hope to see you in mine tonight as well. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul my sweet precious son. 
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah! 

PS Give hugs & kisses to Snicks & Max for Mom. Thank you!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Friday evening? Mom has had a pretty good day today. Got a lot accomplished as far as house work, 2 loads of laundry, giving both pups baths & now I just got done making Shepard's Pie for dinner. I remember it was one of your favorites that Mom used to make for you. There is so much I miss about not having you around, but definitely the little things like this hurt the most. It is the simple things that get Mom. You know it as you see me all the time. You see me at my best, you see me at my worst & everything in between. Sorry I did not get a chance to write to you last night. The day kind of snuck up on me from taking a test all day & then it was time to make dinner, poor Mark... he was sick & he didn't even get to eat until 7 pm last night. Thant is pretty late for us. Mom is having some issues with her left eye. It is swollen on the corner & the whole eyelid. It looks like I got socked in the eye but I didn't. It hurts. I had my aroma therapy pillow on it today for a couple hours, I know you saw me. I hope that it gets better soon. It really hurts as this is the eye that was damaged from the car accident. Any thing that you can do to help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you my sweet precious son.
 I can't believe that Halloween is next Saturday. Your favorite holiday. Always hard this time of year for me. Didn't do any decorating & haven't for 3 years now. I did it for you as I know you loved it & I enjoyed doing it. Some neighbors of ours have some cool ones up so it is nice to see. This year we will have trick or treaters unlike the last 2 years when we were in Texas. Mark & Mom decided to dress up this year for the kids. We are going as Micky Mouse & Minnie Mouse. Should be fun. Our complex is having a party next Thursday so we will be going to that as well. Hope you get a kick out of it when you see us. Mom can hear you laughing right now. 
 No updates at all as I have not talked to anyone today or yesterday. We are still awaiting to find out about Mark's truck & what is going on with that. Keeping our fingers crossed that something will take place soon. Meme, Bob, Grandpa, Debbie, & the rest of our family are doing well. Things are good. Everyone is just disliking the cold weather now. Spring & Summer went by way too fast for us. Hope winter goes by that way too.
 Anyways, Mom has a couple of daily prayers for you so here they are. October 22~ And they that be wise shall shine as the brightness of the firmament; and they that turn many to righteousness as the stars for ever & ever. Let me do what lies clearly at hand, this very minute. Grant me the insight to see that too much planning for the future removes me from the present moment. And this is the only existence, the only calling I have been given----right now to do what is necessary. Nothing more, nothing less. Thus may I use this next moment wisely. Amen.
 October 23~ And when they had prayed, the place was shaken where they were assembled together; and they were all filled with the Holy Ghost, & they spoke the word of God with boldness. Time is tight, Lord, & I wonder why I bother to pray. The question is answer enough: I need a relationship where I don't have to bluff & hurry. And when I pray boldly? I offer myself as a possible answer to prayer. No time to waste. Amen.
 Again, Mom is all caught up. The evening sky is approaching us quickly. The weather was cold, but clear so Mom is hoping that I see the stars & moon shining brightly tonight. I will whisper to you as I always do each night. Hope you can hear Mom. I hope that your evening is filled with all the things you need wherever you may be. May there be peace, love, light, laughter, happiness & everything else you may want. Continue to do all the wonderful things you do for Mom, our family & friends. Please continue to watch over us all. Be with me, as I always need you by my side. Thank you. Mom misses you so much. No words can express just how much so I don't even try to. You can feel it, you know. Love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. May you rest tonight as well. Sweet dreams & hope I see you in my own dreams tonight. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is alright. Didn't have the best day & I am kind of cranky. Mark worked from home today because his client was sick. He was not feeling well either. Hope Mom does not catch it as I don't need it. No news on Mark's Explorer today so I guess the guys are still trying to locate an engine for him. Everything is just a mess. Not sure what to do to get out of this ordeal that we are in. Mom & Mark are just praying & hoping for the best at this point. I know you are watching over us & we sure do thank you for that. Mom needs you, Mark needs you. Mom misses you so damn much. It hurts everyday. I can't believe that yesterday was 28 months since you have been gone. Mom thought about it when I was trying to sleep last night. I am sure that you heard me talk. I love you so much. My love is & always will be unconditional for you. You were & still are my everything. Mom talks about you all the time. Not sure if folks get tired of it but frankly I could care less. They talk about their kids so why can't I? That is just the way I view it. Mom never really cared if others liked things, just the way I am. My life changed & I changed after I lost you. I am & never will be the same person I once was. Things that mattered then don't matter to me any longer. Funny how that happens. I live with so much less than what I had & I am happier this way now. Living simple as I can with Mark, family, friends & our pups. All that is missing is you my sweet precious son. 
 Got no updates for you as today as you could see was pretty quiet. Spoke to Auntie Kristina for a bit but that was it. Meme texted me & said we would chat later tonight. Hope everything is well with them. I know you watch over our family & friends & Mom is forever grateful that you do. I live closer now than in Oklahoma or Texas but it is still a short distance to get to where they are. 
 Before I forget, here is the daily prayer for you today. October 21~ For all have sinned, & come short of the glory of God; Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus. We shouldn't seek perfection in our friends, for we are not perfect. We should look for kindness,compassion, patience,& humor----in our friends & in our hearts. Amen.
 Well, once again the night sky is almost upon us. Today was raining, dark dreary & cold. Not sure Mom will see the moon & stars shining tonight but that is ok. I will whisper to you as I always do so please be listening out for my voice. Mom hopes that your evening is filled with love, light, smiles & all the things you need & want it to be. May you slow day, rest your eyes for a bit & have the sweetest of dreams. Mom hopes to see you in my own dreams tonight. Keep sending me signs too. I look for them & I love them so much! You are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing tonight on this Tuesday? Mom is doing a little better than last night. Didn't get much sleep but hopefully tonight I will get the chance to get lots of sleep that I need to feel well rested. Today was not a good day for Mark at all. He was headed to a client this morning & he called Mom as he was sitting on the side of the road waiting for a tow truck to come get him. I was so worried, but he said he was alright & was not hurt. He was so lucky because he could have got really banged up. The 2 timing chains went in his explorer & because he was going at a high speed the engine ceased up & shut down. Lots of work to be done on his vehicle & a high price tag to go with it. Not sure what we are going to do. Money is tight as we put in a few thousand dollars into the Explorer before we went to Florida, then it broke down when we were coming home & that was a few hundred dollars & now this which will be several thousands of dollars. Thank you for watching over Mark. I am so blessed & thankful that he is ok. 
 No updates for you today other than what I just said. Will call Aunt Beck tomorrow to see how they are. Mom did a little studying. In the middle of a very tough test & this one is going to take me a bit to do. I want to do well on it but my confidence is not up where it should be. This will determine if I am doing the right thing by going down this path for a career. If you could be with Mom & help me through this & everything else that would be great. Thank you so much. 
 Got a couple of daily prayers for you tonight so here they are. October 19~ And the Lord, he it is that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee; fear not, neither be dismayed. Lord, give me the faith to take the next step, even when I don't know what lies ahead. Give me the assurance that, even if I stumble & fall, you'll pick me up & put me back on the path. And give me the confidence that, even if I lose faith, you will never lose me. Amen.
 October 20~ A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another: as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. Father in heaven, let me be an angel to someone today. Just have you have blessed my life with people who love & cherish me, let me be a light of love that shines upon someone who needs me. I have received the gift of angels, now allow me to give & be one in return. Amen.
 All caught up yet again my sweet precious son. Mom misses you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Hope that your night is all that you need & want it to be. May you continue to do all the wonderful things you keep doing all over the world. I know you are so busy & it makes Mom smile to know that you are happy & busy. May you take some time & relax tonight. Get some rest. Sweet dreams. Hope I get to see you in my dreams tonight as well. 
 I will look to see if the stars & moon are out tonight. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Love you.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? Hope you are warm where you may be. It is so cold here. We have our heat on 70 degrees & it is still cold. This is way too early to have to have our heat on but we have no choice. The temp tonight is going to fall down to 30 degrees. So not right...lol. 
 The day was pretty busy for Mom. Did the usual & took the pups for a walk this morning, then went right to studying. I did 2 lessons & 2 quizzes. I got a 97 on one & a 93 on the other quiz. I started another lesson & then started on the quiz but didn't finish it but I will tomorrow. I now only have 3 more left & I am done. Maybe this week I will be doing my final exam. Not sure. Taking my time. Mark had a busy day as well. He went to the office 1st thing this morning & then he went to a client this afternoon. Mom is quite tired tonight & my eyes hurt from looking at a computer all day. My bones hurt as I am not used to the cold weather yet. Think it is going to be an early night for me tonight. Guess I am still recovering from vacation. Things will be better tomorrow.
 Mom will write out the daily prayer for today in your letter that I write to you tomorrow. Sorry Ty, but I know that you understand where I am coming from. Thank you so much. You know how it gets when Mom does not feel good. You know that I need to chill out & relax. Thank you for understanding. It means so much. Please be with Mom as I need you right now. I need you all the time. I know I asked Aunt Beck to do some healing work on me from my neck up, guess I need some more healing work done because whatever she was doing it really worked ( so if you read this Beck, I really could use some more, please & thank you!)
 The evening sky is upon us. It is so dark out. Mom will look up to the sky later to see if I can see the moon & the stars. I will whisper to you as I always do so please be listening out for my voice. Hope you have a wonderful night tonight doing all the things you want, need & love to do. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Hope Mom sees you in my dreams tonight as well. I miss you so much. I think of you all the time. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. I promise to write to you more tomorrow night. I just need to get some rest & get warm.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!