Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom had quite the busy day today but for the most part it was really good. The weather was absolutely gorgeous today. It was 72 degrees & the sun was out for the most part. As the day went on the clouds started rolling in. Tomorrow the weather will be the same & I will take it. This is the weather that we both loved. Mom took the pups for a long walk today 7 they enjoyed it. Ozzy was constantly trying to get the leaves that were blowing around. It was cute. Meet a dog walker as well & 2 new pups that now live right next to us. They were cute. The whole time we were chatting my mind was thinking of you & how much you loved all animals, especially dogs. Mom could hear you say just how cute they were & I could see that smile. Oh God, how I miss it all. Your voice, your face, your smile, your laugh... Mom misses it all. Mom misses you so much. Every day does not get easier for me, it really gets harder. It kills me. You were my world, it was always you & I, now everything changed & I don't have you & I, I just have me. I try to be positive but some days I can't...I am negative & hate it. I try not to be angry but there are days that I am so raged at what happened. I wish that Mom just could know what exactly happened & why. I know that one day I will get all the answers to all my questions. I know that you know & have since the day you were called home. Mom knows that you understand it all & you are ok with the answers. You said it all made sense. Wish you could pass it along to Mom....guess for now I will have to play the waiting game. 
 Did some studying today. I have been working on a test now for a week just to make sure I got it all right. I submitted it & I am so angry at myself. I totally bombed the test....not because I didn't have the right answers ( for the most part, ) it was because Mom didn't save her corrected answers on the computer & I submitted it before checking. When I saw the grade I was like " what???" & then noticed what happened. Lesson definitely learned. It dropped my GPA a little but I am still at a 4.0 & Dean's List so I will take that. 
 Spoke to Grandpa & Meme today. They are excited that we are going up there this weekend. Mom is at that point where I really need some family time. Mom will get to see some friends while up there too. Not enough time to see everyone that I would like to but now that Mark's vehicle is back & working Mom can make the trip to NH whenever I want to for however long I want. Such a nice feeling & the freedom is wonderful too. Want to get as much time up there in as Mom will be studying for her certification test in the next few weeks & then it will be time for me to go back out into the working world. I can't wait for that actually. I am excited. I know that you will be with me every step of the way. Thank you pumpkin.
 Not much else to update you on tonight. I know I will have bunches on Sunday when we get back home. Please continue to watch over us all. It means so much to Mom to have you with me even if I can't see you. I look every where for your signs so please keep them coming. Thank you.
 Here is the daily prayer for today. November 5~ And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity. The angel of faith helps us trust God despite our circumstance. The angel of hope helps us press on through our circumstance. But the angel of God's love holds us in our circumstance. Amen. 
 Well, the night sky is fully upon us now. It gets dark so early now & I can't stand it..ugh! Mom is hoping to see the moon & the stars shining tonight but not sure. Either way, I will be whispering to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice. Hope it makes you smile. Mom hopes that your night is all that you need & want it to be. Hope that you get a chance to relax a bit. Close those beautiful eyes & get some sleep. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Mom hopes to see you in my dreams tonight as well. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. Never forget this.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

PS Today is Bonnie's Birthday... stop by & say hello to her...just don't scare her...lol!