Sunday, July 31, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Sunday afternoon? Mom is doing well....at least better than I was a couple days ago. Friday was a tough day for Mom as it was your Birthday & during the day I was feeling quite sick that is why I didn't send balloons up to you & Saturday was a pretty good day. Grandpa & Debbie came down to visit Mark & Mom. They surprised us. Guess they were around the Manchester area & decided to make the extra hour drive to visit us for a few hours. Boy it sure was nice to see them. I miss our family & friends so much. Mom is getting excited as our vacation is coming up & I get to spend 10 days with everyone. I don't care what we do...I am just looking forward to the time away. The only thing that will be missing is you my sweet precious son. I know that you will be with us all during our trip but it is just not the same. I wish I could see you, I wish that you could be with Mom & our family...laughing & joking. I miss you so much. Nothing will ever be the same. I am sorry that I did not write to you last night but Grandpa & Debbie left around 4 pm & then Mark went to the store & I was just plain tired as I did not sleep the night before. I know that is no excuse but it is the truth. Mark & Mom relaxed last night for a bit & then Mark did not feel good later in the evening. We went to bed early & got up at 8 am this morning. Today has been a pretty good day. Sat out on the balcony this morning while it rained & watched the birds. I saw a couple cardinals. After that I did vacuuming, laundry, dusting, & got ready. Went out & did grocery shopping & Mom got her nails done. Got home at 3:30ish & now I am writing to you. We have a skype call coming up soon so I need to get going & make dinner so we are done by then.
Mom has no updates as I have not spoken to anyone at all today. I might later tonight but if not I sure will chat with many during the week as I have time because my college books won't be here until Thursday afternoon. I basically get a week break from studying. My next class is Psychology. I am excited for this one. I hope I will do well in it! I know you will be right by my side so I know everything will be ok with Mom. Thank you so much.
I know Mom will not be seeing anything shining in the sky tonight as it is still very much overcast & cloudy & there is no blue skies which means there will be no clear skies tonight. I know you are shining bright somewhere for others that need it more than Mom. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for me. I will smile when I chat with you so smile back & I will picture it in my mind. I hope that you night is all that you need & want it to be. I am sure you will be learning a lot & having a few adventures along the way as well as I sleep tonight. Come visit Mom if you can. I love it when you do. It means so much to me. Go see Meme as well. She really wants to see you. She misses her Peanut so much. It would mean the world to her...even if it is just for a few moments. Please remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. To infinity & beyond. Before I close I will write to you the daily prayers that I need catching up on.....here they are. July 30~ As a father has compassion for his children, so the Lord has compassion for those who fear him. For he knows how we are made; he remembers that we are dust. Sometimes I want to believe that I'm made of physical & moral titanium. Lord, but I am not. My best efforts are more like wood, hay, & stubble. It's only because of your mercy & grace at work in my life that I see good spiritual fruit being produced there. Thank you that you remind me I am made of mere earthly elements & my body will someday return to the dust. Thank you that knowing my frailties, you are compassionate toward me. I receive your kindness with deep gratitude today. Humility acknowledges God & opens the door for his compassion to flow into my life. Amen.
July 31~ The steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him & his righteousness to children's children. Almighty Father, in a world where everything seems to be changing by the minute, the word " steadfast " is like a neon sign, indicating a place of refuge. And that is what your love is, Lord: a refuge, the one thing we can count on in life & the thing that doesn't change. I never know what the price of fuel will be in the morning, but I know I will wake up with the assurance of your love. May each successive generation----my children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren & beyond----come to know the assurance of your steadfast love. It is said, in life, only death & taxes are certain but what is truly certain in this life? For starters, God's love & his faithfulness. How much better are these certainties than the other supposed ones! How much better life seems in the light of them! Amen.
Good night, Tyler. Sweet dreams. I love you beyond any words can express. Until tomorrow.....
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. Go visit Uncle Ray & Auntie Ann.... today is their 34th Wedding Anniversary! They would love a visit from you.
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Sunday afternoon? Mom is doing well....at least better than I was a couple days ago. Friday was a tough day for Mom as it was your Birthday & during the day I was feeling quite sick that is why I didn't send balloons up to you & Saturday was a pretty good day. Grandpa & Debbie came down to visit Mark & Mom. They surprised us. Guess they were around the Manchester area & decided to make the extra hour drive to visit us for a few hours. Boy it sure was nice to see them. I miss our family & friends so much. Mom is getting excited as our vacation is coming up & I get to spend 10 days with everyone. I don't care what we do...I am just looking forward to the time away. The only thing that will be missing is you my sweet precious son. I know that you will be with us all during our trip but it is just not the same. I wish I could see you, I wish that you could be with Mom & our family...laughing & joking. I miss you so much. Nothing will ever be the same. I am sorry that I did not write to you last night but Grandpa & Debbie left around 4 pm & then Mark went to the store & I was just plain tired as I did not sleep the night before. I know that is no excuse but it is the truth. Mark & Mom relaxed last night for a bit & then Mark did not feel good later in the evening. We went to bed early & got up at 8 am this morning. Today has been a pretty good day. Sat out on the balcony this morning while it rained & watched the birds. I saw a couple cardinals. After that I did vacuuming, laundry, dusting, & got ready. Went out & did grocery shopping & Mom got her nails done. Got home at 3:30ish & now I am writing to you. We have a skype call coming up soon so I need to get going & make dinner so we are done by then.
Mom has no updates as I have not spoken to anyone at all today. I might later tonight but if not I sure will chat with many during the week as I have time because my college books won't be here until Thursday afternoon. I basically get a week break from studying. My next class is Psychology. I am excited for this one. I hope I will do well in it! I know you will be right by my side so I know everything will be ok with Mom. Thank you so much.
I know Mom will not be seeing anything shining in the sky tonight as it is still very much overcast & cloudy & there is no blue skies which means there will be no clear skies tonight. I know you are shining bright somewhere for others that need it more than Mom. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for me. I will smile when I chat with you so smile back & I will picture it in my mind. I hope that you night is all that you need & want it to be. I am sure you will be learning a lot & having a few adventures along the way as well as I sleep tonight. Come visit Mom if you can. I love it when you do. It means so much to me. Go see Meme as well. She really wants to see you. She misses her Peanut so much. It would mean the world to her...even if it is just for a few moments. Please remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. To infinity & beyond. Before I close I will write to you the daily prayers that I need catching up on.....here they are. July 30~ As a father has compassion for his children, so the Lord has compassion for those who fear him. For he knows how we are made; he remembers that we are dust. Sometimes I want to believe that I'm made of physical & moral titanium. Lord, but I am not. My best efforts are more like wood, hay, & stubble. It's only because of your mercy & grace at work in my life that I see good spiritual fruit being produced there. Thank you that you remind me I am made of mere earthly elements & my body will someday return to the dust. Thank you that knowing my frailties, you are compassionate toward me. I receive your kindness with deep gratitude today. Humility acknowledges God & opens the door for his compassion to flow into my life. Amen.
July 31~ The steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him & his righteousness to children's children. Almighty Father, in a world where everything seems to be changing by the minute, the word " steadfast " is like a neon sign, indicating a place of refuge. And that is what your love is, Lord: a refuge, the one thing we can count on in life & the thing that doesn't change. I never know what the price of fuel will be in the morning, but I know I will wake up with the assurance of your love. May each successive generation----my children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren & beyond----come to know the assurance of your steadfast love. It is said, in life, only death & taxes are certain but what is truly certain in this life? For starters, God's love & his faithfulness. How much better are these certainties than the other supposed ones! How much better life seems in the light of them! Amen.
Good night, Tyler. Sweet dreams. I love you beyond any words can express. Until tomorrow.....
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. Go visit Uncle Ray & Auntie Ann.... today is their 34th Wedding Anniversary! They would love a visit from you.
Friday, July 29, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Friday evening? Happy Heavenly Birthday to you. Today you would have been 26 years old. Mom has been in pretty depressed mood all day long. I am trying to snap out of it but it really is not working at all. I seem to have a headache that I can not shake & it is just not a good day. I miss you so much. I have shed many of tears today with things that our family & friends have posted on your facebook wall & my own. You were loved so much. So much more than I think you ever knew but I know you do now. I know you don't celebrate your special day anymore whenever you may be but I will never stop. This is the 2nd most hardest day of the year for Mom. I honestly can't wait for it to be done tonight & Saturday to arrive. I am sorry if that sounds harsh because I don't mean it to be at all. So many memories come rushing back to me & there is nothing I can do. I can't see you, I can't hear you, I can't talk to you any longer. These last 3 years have been so hard on me. I know you know that as you see Mom's struggles. I am sorry that you have to witness it but I am not sure what else to do. I will always grieve the loss of you. Every day....just some days are better than others....not many but some. Mom has had several family & friends call today to see how I was doing which was really nice. I spoke to Meme, Grandpa, Aunt Beck & Auntie Kristina. More friends like I said reached out to me by social media, text messages, etc.. Mom really has a wonderful support system. I love them all very much for it. They are my rocks & they don't even know it.
Mom was going to send balloons up to you today but for the most part the weather was not cooperating at all. It was really cloudy, windy & rainy. About 2 hours ago the clouds went away, the sky turned blue & the sun is shining. Mom will have to get your balloons tomorrow & send them up to you a day late. Sorry pumpkin. Aunt Beck told me to light a candle for you tonight so that is what I plan to do later this evening. So if you see it burning please know it is for you. I love you my sweet precious son. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. Mom has the daily prayer for you but also I wanted to write to you something that I found as well. I hope that you like it.
July 29~ For he is our God & we are the people of his pasture & the sheep of his hand. Father in Heaven!..... Grant us to feel that without Thee we can do nothing---a feeling not of cowardly dependence but a feeling of hopeful strength, in the happy assurance that Thou art powerful among the weak. Sheep are completely dependent on their shepherd's protection, provision, guidance, doctoring, knowledge of the land & kindness. They trust only their shepherd & will answer the call of no other. Amen.
Here is the other thing I wanted to write.....
Before I was a Mom
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations. Before I was a Mom- I had never been puked on, pooped on, chewed on, peed on. I had complete control of my mind & my thoughts. I slept all night before I was a Mom. I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes & cried. I never gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep before I was a Mom. I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put him down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom. Before I was a Mom- I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
Boy is that the truth, Tyler. I loved being your Mom. I still am your Mom just in a different way now but boy I miss the old way like crazy. So many memories came back to me today on the day you were born... it is like it was yesterday. Mom saw something yesterday & it said..... Just because my child died does not mean I am not a Mother. It just means my child flies instead of walks now. I will post it on here as well.
The evening sky will be approaching us shortly & faster than normal. I hope to look to the sky tonight & see the stars shining bright & maybe the moon. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening to hear my voice. Hope you smile when you hear it. I will try to smile but no guarantees tonight though. I hope that you have many adventures tonight along with things that you may need to do & want to do as well. Please come & visit me tonight, Tyler. I sure could use it. Thank you. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Ty & sweet dreams. Until tomorrow night...... I love you to infinity & beyond.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Friday evening? Happy Heavenly Birthday to you. Today you would have been 26 years old. Mom has been in pretty depressed mood all day long. I am trying to snap out of it but it really is not working at all. I seem to have a headache that I can not shake & it is just not a good day. I miss you so much. I have shed many of tears today with things that our family & friends have posted on your facebook wall & my own. You were loved so much. So much more than I think you ever knew but I know you do now. I know you don't celebrate your special day anymore whenever you may be but I will never stop. This is the 2nd most hardest day of the year for Mom. I honestly can't wait for it to be done tonight & Saturday to arrive. I am sorry if that sounds harsh because I don't mean it to be at all. So many memories come rushing back to me & there is nothing I can do. I can't see you, I can't hear you, I can't talk to you any longer. These last 3 years have been so hard on me. I know you know that as you see Mom's struggles. I am sorry that you have to witness it but I am not sure what else to do. I will always grieve the loss of you. Every day....just some days are better than others....not many but some. Mom has had several family & friends call today to see how I was doing which was really nice. I spoke to Meme, Grandpa, Aunt Beck & Auntie Kristina. More friends like I said reached out to me by social media, text messages, etc.. Mom really has a wonderful support system. I love them all very much for it. They are my rocks & they don't even know it.
Mom was going to send balloons up to you today but for the most part the weather was not cooperating at all. It was really cloudy, windy & rainy. About 2 hours ago the clouds went away, the sky turned blue & the sun is shining. Mom will have to get your balloons tomorrow & send them up to you a day late. Sorry pumpkin. Aunt Beck told me to light a candle for you tonight so that is what I plan to do later this evening. So if you see it burning please know it is for you. I love you my sweet precious son. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. Mom has the daily prayer for you but also I wanted to write to you something that I found as well. I hope that you like it.
July 29~ For he is our God & we are the people of his pasture & the sheep of his hand. Father in Heaven!..... Grant us to feel that without Thee we can do nothing---a feeling not of cowardly dependence but a feeling of hopeful strength, in the happy assurance that Thou art powerful among the weak. Sheep are completely dependent on their shepherd's protection, provision, guidance, doctoring, knowledge of the land & kindness. They trust only their shepherd & will answer the call of no other. Amen.
Here is the other thing I wanted to write.....
Before I was a Mom
I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations. Before I was a Mom- I had never been puked on, pooped on, chewed on, peed on. I had complete control of my mind & my thoughts. I slept all night before I was a Mom. I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes & cried. I never gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep before I was a Mom. I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put him down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew I would love being a Mom. Before I was a Mom- I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
Boy is that the truth, Tyler. I loved being your Mom. I still am your Mom just in a different way now but boy I miss the old way like crazy. So many memories came back to me today on the day you were born... it is like it was yesterday. Mom saw something yesterday & it said..... Just because my child died does not mean I am not a Mother. It just means my child flies instead of walks now. I will post it on here as well.
The evening sky will be approaching us shortly & faster than normal. I hope to look to the sky tonight & see the stars shining bright & maybe the moon. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening to hear my voice. Hope you smile when you hear it. I will try to smile but no guarantees tonight though. I hope that you have many adventures tonight along with things that you may need to do & want to do as well. Please come & visit me tonight, Tyler. I sure could use it. Thank you. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Ty & sweet dreams. Until tomorrow night...... I love you to infinity & beyond.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, July 28, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom is in the middle of writing to you & also cooking dinner. The multi tasking thing again is not a strong suit for me so I hope that I am able to pull this all off. Today the weather again was so muggy & hot & humid. No complaints though from me. The next few days will be sunny with clouds scattered around but the temps are going to dip back to the lower 80's. Still it will be nice but not muggy & humid. It will be a nice break though. I am looking forward to it.
Today would have been Mom's friend Wendy's 45th Birthday. She always used to give me crap about you not coming a day early so you 2 could share your special days together. I posted something on facebook to her so I know she will see it. I told her to give you a big hug & kiss from me for your Birthday. Can you do Mom a favor as well... Can you give her a big ole hug from me? I sure miss her bunches. She suffered for many years & was just an inspiration like you. She had many bad days but never showed it to anyone. She would always smile & she had such a big heart with lots of love to give...especially to her children & husband. You met her when you were little so I am not sure you would remember he or not but I know you know her now. Mom will be releasing balloons to you tomorrow like I always do on your Birthday. I will send Wendy up some as well. Hope you both like them & smile as you are floating on them. It sure is going to be a rough day for Mom but please be with me & just have patience with me. I will do my best to try & smile to you but if I can't & the tears come...please forgive me my sweet precious son. Every day is still a challenge for me & it is still difficult. I know you understand though. You see everything now. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
I got to talk to Grandpa tonight & hopefully I will chat with Meme tonight. Things are good as far as I know with everyone. I got to see a recent picture of Aunt Beck on facebook as well. She looks amazing. She looks very happy & I am so happy for her. She sure is busy with life. I don't get to talk to her as much as I would like to that's for sure but I am grateful for the times that I do. I miss Bean as well. She seems to be even busier. Today, I got the chance to talk to Megan. It was really nice. I really miss her. We had our ups & downs through the years but she & Chris will always be special to me. Her little boy is so adorable. He will be turning a year old in 2 months. That sure flew right by. She was telling Mom that her family is all doing fine except her Great Gram. I guess she is pretty ill these days. I hope she gets better soon. I always liked her. She was feisty & sassy...kind of like Mom. I know she misses you a great deal. She talked about you today. That was so nice to hear. I know she calls on you a lot as well & I have no doubt in my mind that you watch over all of them as they were quite special to you to.
Today, Mom tried to help a friend out but I think that I made matters worse. I hate seeing my friend in dire straits & that is exactly what is going on right now. I told him the things that I would do, I offered advice to him as well & I think I may have come across harsh even though I didn't mean to. I know that my friend may have not wanted to hear all that I had to say because some of it was tough to hear let alone tough for me to say but it needed to be said. I am so tired of hearing that this person bust their butt just to have so many bad things happen to them when its not their fault & it is all because of someone else. I really hope that a miracle happens & many Angels are watching over my friend tonight, tomorrow & several days after that. I am worried , very worried. Please Tyler, you know who I am talking about....if there is anything that you can do please help. Mom would really appreciate it so much. Thank you pumpkin.
Here is the daily prayer for today. July 28~ Know that the Lord is God. It is he that made us & we are his; we are his people & the sheep of his pasture. My precious Lord, what does it mean to know that you are God? The psalm for today gives me some clues; to remember that I'm not my own, that I belong to you & that you made me. That's a start. I'll gegin there, Lord & thank you for making me. I'm thankful that I am one of your " sheep " & that you are such a kind & good shepherd, who with wisdom & patience tends to all that pertains to my life. You are God, indeed. Help me pause often to remember it so that I won't get off track & wander from your kind & perfect purposes for my life. I am the good shepherd. I know my own & my own know me, just as the Father knows me & I know the Father. And I lay down my life for the sheep. Amen.
The night sky is upon us quite early tonight. The sky is already almost all dark & it is not even 8 pm. Guess we will be getting some rain after all. The sky is pretty cloudy as well so I guess I won't see any stars or the moon shining bright. I will whisper to you as I always do later though. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear me. I will smile too. I hope that you have an evening filled with all the tings you need & want to do. Come visit with Mom in my dreams tonight. I miss you more than words can say. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & the wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler & sweet dreams. I love you to infinity & beyond. Until tomorrow.....
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom is in the middle of writing to you & also cooking dinner. The multi tasking thing again is not a strong suit for me so I hope that I am able to pull this all off. Today the weather again was so muggy & hot & humid. No complaints though from me. The next few days will be sunny with clouds scattered around but the temps are going to dip back to the lower 80's. Still it will be nice but not muggy & humid. It will be a nice break though. I am looking forward to it.
Today would have been Mom's friend Wendy's 45th Birthday. She always used to give me crap about you not coming a day early so you 2 could share your special days together. I posted something on facebook to her so I know she will see it. I told her to give you a big hug & kiss from me for your Birthday. Can you do Mom a favor as well... Can you give her a big ole hug from me? I sure miss her bunches. She suffered for many years & was just an inspiration like you. She had many bad days but never showed it to anyone. She would always smile & she had such a big heart with lots of love to give...especially to her children & husband. You met her when you were little so I am not sure you would remember he or not but I know you know her now. Mom will be releasing balloons to you tomorrow like I always do on your Birthday. I will send Wendy up some as well. Hope you both like them & smile as you are floating on them. It sure is going to be a rough day for Mom but please be with me & just have patience with me. I will do my best to try & smile to you but if I can't & the tears come...please forgive me my sweet precious son. Every day is still a challenge for me & it is still difficult. I know you understand though. You see everything now. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
I got to talk to Grandpa tonight & hopefully I will chat with Meme tonight. Things are good as far as I know with everyone. I got to see a recent picture of Aunt Beck on facebook as well. She looks amazing. She looks very happy & I am so happy for her. She sure is busy with life. I don't get to talk to her as much as I would like to that's for sure but I am grateful for the times that I do. I miss Bean as well. She seems to be even busier. Today, I got the chance to talk to Megan. It was really nice. I really miss her. We had our ups & downs through the years but she & Chris will always be special to me. Her little boy is so adorable. He will be turning a year old in 2 months. That sure flew right by. She was telling Mom that her family is all doing fine except her Great Gram. I guess she is pretty ill these days. I hope she gets better soon. I always liked her. She was feisty & sassy...kind of like Mom. I know she misses you a great deal. She talked about you today. That was so nice to hear. I know she calls on you a lot as well & I have no doubt in my mind that you watch over all of them as they were quite special to you to.
Today, Mom tried to help a friend out but I think that I made matters worse. I hate seeing my friend in dire straits & that is exactly what is going on right now. I told him the things that I would do, I offered advice to him as well & I think I may have come across harsh even though I didn't mean to. I know that my friend may have not wanted to hear all that I had to say because some of it was tough to hear let alone tough for me to say but it needed to be said. I am so tired of hearing that this person bust their butt just to have so many bad things happen to them when its not their fault & it is all because of someone else. I really hope that a miracle happens & many Angels are watching over my friend tonight, tomorrow & several days after that. I am worried , very worried. Please Tyler, you know who I am talking about....if there is anything that you can do please help. Mom would really appreciate it so much. Thank you pumpkin.
Here is the daily prayer for today. July 28~ Know that the Lord is God. It is he that made us & we are his; we are his people & the sheep of his pasture. My precious Lord, what does it mean to know that you are God? The psalm for today gives me some clues; to remember that I'm not my own, that I belong to you & that you made me. That's a start. I'll gegin there, Lord & thank you for making me. I'm thankful that I am one of your " sheep " & that you are such a kind & good shepherd, who with wisdom & patience tends to all that pertains to my life. You are God, indeed. Help me pause often to remember it so that I won't get off track & wander from your kind & perfect purposes for my life. I am the good shepherd. I know my own & my own know me, just as the Father knows me & I know the Father. And I lay down my life for the sheep. Amen.
The night sky is upon us quite early tonight. The sky is already almost all dark & it is not even 8 pm. Guess we will be getting some rain after all. The sky is pretty cloudy as well so I guess I won't see any stars or the moon shining bright. I will whisper to you as I always do later though. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear me. I will smile too. I hope that you have an evening filled with all the tings you need & want to do. Come visit with Mom in my dreams tonight. I miss you more than words can say. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & the wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler & sweet dreams. I love you to infinity & beyond. Until tomorrow.....
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Wednesday, July 27, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is doing ok at the present moment. Before writing to you I had received my grades for the 2 exams that I submitted yesterday & today. To say the least I am quite happy with the results. So far I have taken 7 exams in 2 weeks & my grades are 5~100's a 98 & a 91. Right now I am sitting at a 4.0 GPA & I owe it all to you. I wouldn't be able to do all that I am doing if it wasn't for you, Tyler. You gave Mom the knowledge that I have in this field. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I just hope that you are proud of me.
The day has been quite busy doing all kinds of things from housework, laundry, chatting on the phone a couple of times to doing my schoolwork. The weather was another hot day & it will be again tomorrow as well. The humid & muggy temps do break as of Friday so that will be nice for a few days at least. It will be another busy weekend coming up but I am looking forward to it.
I feel so badly as I do not have any updates for you at all. I have not spoken to our family for the last 5 days or so. It is unusual but I guess that we have all been quite busy with the every day life things. I hope to chat with Meme & Grandpa later tonight but if not then definitely tomorrow. I promise I will have something for you in the next night or 2.
Here is the daily prayer for today though. July 27~ So teach us to count our days that we may gain a wise heart. My Lord, my days on earth have a number. That number is unknown to me or anyone else but you. What I do know, however, is that I have this moment in which I can seek you, seek to know you & seek to walk in your wisdom. Please help me not squander or fritter away the time that you grant me to live. I want to go about my days purposefully, yet with a light & joyful spirit, as I entrust myself to you & obey your Word & your Spirit in all things. Twelve-step recovery programs urge participants to take life one day at a time, one moment at a time. There is great wisdom in this, since none of us can retrieve the past nor can we know the future; we can only live & act in this present moment----the gift of life granted to us right now. Amen.
Wow... that prayer was something else, huh? It is so true in every way. We don't know how much time we have in the physical world. It is a day to day thing for everyone. There is a quote that says..." Live each day as it was your last. " So true. Live life the way you want to with no regrets. One of Mom's favorite sayings of all times is " Life is not measured by the breaths you take but by the moments that take your breath away " You gave me so many of those moments. You made me happy to be a Mom. I loved it even in the rough times we faced. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I don't take anything for granted...not even a single breath. Mom considers herself very lucky even though I lost you. That was the toughest thing ever to face not having you here but it was the most rewarding as well to be the one you chose to live this life we did together. I miss it every day. I miss you so much. I hope you know just how much that is. I hope you can feel it still. You will always be my everything. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. You will forever remain in my heart, mind & soul. I love you beyond words....to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Mom will whisper to you later tonight. I will look to the sky to hopefully see the moon & stars shining bright. I hope your evening is filled with all the things you need to do & want to do. Enjoy your adventures along the way as well. Smile & be happy while I sleep tonight. Come be with Mom. I need you by my side. Thanks pumpkin. I will be looking for a beautiful " sunset painting " as well this evening. I will smile so I hope you see me. Good night my sweet precious son. Sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is doing ok at the present moment. Before writing to you I had received my grades for the 2 exams that I submitted yesterday & today. To say the least I am quite happy with the results. So far I have taken 7 exams in 2 weeks & my grades are 5~100's a 98 & a 91. Right now I am sitting at a 4.0 GPA & I owe it all to you. I wouldn't be able to do all that I am doing if it wasn't for you, Tyler. You gave Mom the knowledge that I have in this field. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I just hope that you are proud of me.
The day has been quite busy doing all kinds of things from housework, laundry, chatting on the phone a couple of times to doing my schoolwork. The weather was another hot day & it will be again tomorrow as well. The humid & muggy temps do break as of Friday so that will be nice for a few days at least. It will be another busy weekend coming up but I am looking forward to it.
I feel so badly as I do not have any updates for you at all. I have not spoken to our family for the last 5 days or so. It is unusual but I guess that we have all been quite busy with the every day life things. I hope to chat with Meme & Grandpa later tonight but if not then definitely tomorrow. I promise I will have something for you in the next night or 2.
Here is the daily prayer for today though. July 27~ So teach us to count our days that we may gain a wise heart. My Lord, my days on earth have a number. That number is unknown to me or anyone else but you. What I do know, however, is that I have this moment in which I can seek you, seek to know you & seek to walk in your wisdom. Please help me not squander or fritter away the time that you grant me to live. I want to go about my days purposefully, yet with a light & joyful spirit, as I entrust myself to you & obey your Word & your Spirit in all things. Twelve-step recovery programs urge participants to take life one day at a time, one moment at a time. There is great wisdom in this, since none of us can retrieve the past nor can we know the future; we can only live & act in this present moment----the gift of life granted to us right now. Amen.
Wow... that prayer was something else, huh? It is so true in every way. We don't know how much time we have in the physical world. It is a day to day thing for everyone. There is a quote that says..." Live each day as it was your last. " So true. Live life the way you want to with no regrets. One of Mom's favorite sayings of all times is " Life is not measured by the breaths you take but by the moments that take your breath away " You gave me so many of those moments. You made me happy to be a Mom. I loved it even in the rough times we faced. I wouldn't trade it for the world. I don't take anything for granted...not even a single breath. Mom considers herself very lucky even though I lost you. That was the toughest thing ever to face not having you here but it was the most rewarding as well to be the one you chose to live this life we did together. I miss it every day. I miss you so much. I hope you know just how much that is. I hope you can feel it still. You will always be my everything. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. You will forever remain in my heart, mind & soul. I love you beyond words....to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Mom will whisper to you later tonight. I will look to the sky to hopefully see the moon & stars shining bright. I hope your evening is filled with all the things you need to do & want to do. Enjoy your adventures along the way as well. Smile & be happy while I sleep tonight. Come be with Mom. I need you by my side. Thanks pumpkin. I will be looking for a beautiful " sunset painting " as well this evening. I will smile so I hope you see me. Good night my sweet precious son. Sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Tuesday, July 26, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Tuesday evening? Mom just got done reading another chapter in her books for school. I submitted an exam today as well but do not have the grade back as of yet. Guess it takes a day or 2 to have them back when I have to submit them. Its been a pretty long day today as I did not really get a lot of sleep last night. We got some disturbing news here where we live & it really shook Mom up. I am hoping that I will sleep better later tonight. I could really use the sleep. If there is anything you can do to help Mom with that & to ease her nerves that would be great. I would appreciate it a great deal. You know me...always a nervous Nelly....lol. Thank you pumpkin.
The weather today has been another hot one. This is week 3 that we are in for the temps being in the mid 90's. I am not going to complain but boy as you know it is really usual weather for us in this part of the US. I guess the humid & muggy weather will subside by Thursday & it will drop the temps by 17 degrees or so. It will still be nice & sunny just not so muggy. I think it will be a nice change. Someone sent me a thing on facebook saying 17 more weeks & it will be winter again with snow. Ugh... I don't even want to think about that at all. I can deal with the cold but I am really hoping for a winter with very little snow again. That would be nice. Guess only time will tell. Mom is counting the days now until vacation. I believe we have 50 something now. It is approaching fast. Wish you were here to be going with us but I know you will be even though I can't see you. Hope you will give me some signs like you always do when I need them the most. Haven't spoken to anyone in the last 4 days but I am assuming that everyone is well & they are just busy in this thing we call life. Mark is working a lot still...never a change there. He really needs to slow down as I worry about him. He is still young but with what he is doing is is older & his body just can't take it like it could before. He needs to take care of himself better too. Eating right & staying hydrated would be a good start but he is a grown man & I can only do so much. I am hoping to have some updates for you in the next few days. Mom will have to wait for her next set of college books so I will have a couple free days next week to catch up with everyone. I do have the daily prayer for today for you though. July 26~ Light dawns for the righteous & joy for the upright in heart. When the last sea is sailed & the last shallow charted, when the last field is reaped & the last harvest stored, when the last fire is out & the last guest departed, grant the last prayer that I shall pray, Be good to me O Lord. The day that dawns in heaven for me will never know a sunset. In its eternal light, I will always live & rejoice without fear or pain or dread or sorrow or worry, with no shadow of death lurking & looming anymore. I shall soar in unmitigated joy & then light in pure peace & sing clearly & dance freely as I was created to do. I will be united at last with the love of my life & never again be separated from him nor from any of those who have loved him on earth. And so shall we ever be with the Lord, for the day that dawns in heaven for us will never know a sunset. Amen.
Well, it is that time of night where Mom needs to turn off the computer & get the pups fed & start prepping dinner for Mark & I. Think it is going to be a late one tonight but that is ok. I don't have to rush at all & that will be nice. Mom will be looking to the sky later to see if I see the moon & stars shining bright. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for my voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you. I hope that your night is filled with everything you need to do & want to do. I know you will have adventures & lessons to learn as well. Come visit Mom tonight if you can. I miss you like crazy. No words can describe just how much I do but I know you feel it in your soul & that is all that matters to Mom. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the would. To infinity & beyond. Mom will also be looking at the sunset that you will " paint " me tonight. Hope it is a pretty one. Good night my sweet precious son & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Tuesday evening? Mom just got done reading another chapter in her books for school. I submitted an exam today as well but do not have the grade back as of yet. Guess it takes a day or 2 to have them back when I have to submit them. Its been a pretty long day today as I did not really get a lot of sleep last night. We got some disturbing news here where we live & it really shook Mom up. I am hoping that I will sleep better later tonight. I could really use the sleep. If there is anything you can do to help Mom with that & to ease her nerves that would be great. I would appreciate it a great deal. You know me...always a nervous Nelly....lol. Thank you pumpkin.
The weather today has been another hot one. This is week 3 that we are in for the temps being in the mid 90's. I am not going to complain but boy as you know it is really usual weather for us in this part of the US. I guess the humid & muggy weather will subside by Thursday & it will drop the temps by 17 degrees or so. It will still be nice & sunny just not so muggy. I think it will be a nice change. Someone sent me a thing on facebook saying 17 more weeks & it will be winter again with snow. Ugh... I don't even want to think about that at all. I can deal with the cold but I am really hoping for a winter with very little snow again. That would be nice. Guess only time will tell. Mom is counting the days now until vacation. I believe we have 50 something now. It is approaching fast. Wish you were here to be going with us but I know you will be even though I can't see you. Hope you will give me some signs like you always do when I need them the most. Haven't spoken to anyone in the last 4 days but I am assuming that everyone is well & they are just busy in this thing we call life. Mark is working a lot still...never a change there. He really needs to slow down as I worry about him. He is still young but with what he is doing is is older & his body just can't take it like it could before. He needs to take care of himself better too. Eating right & staying hydrated would be a good start but he is a grown man & I can only do so much. I am hoping to have some updates for you in the next few days. Mom will have to wait for her next set of college books so I will have a couple free days next week to catch up with everyone. I do have the daily prayer for today for you though. July 26~ Light dawns for the righteous & joy for the upright in heart. When the last sea is sailed & the last shallow charted, when the last field is reaped & the last harvest stored, when the last fire is out & the last guest departed, grant the last prayer that I shall pray, Be good to me O Lord. The day that dawns in heaven for me will never know a sunset. In its eternal light, I will always live & rejoice without fear or pain or dread or sorrow or worry, with no shadow of death lurking & looming anymore. I shall soar in unmitigated joy & then light in pure peace & sing clearly & dance freely as I was created to do. I will be united at last with the love of my life & never again be separated from him nor from any of those who have loved him on earth. And so shall we ever be with the Lord, for the day that dawns in heaven for us will never know a sunset. Amen.
Well, it is that time of night where Mom needs to turn off the computer & get the pups fed & start prepping dinner for Mark & I. Think it is going to be a late one tonight but that is ok. I don't have to rush at all & that will be nice. Mom will be looking to the sky later to see if I see the moon & stars shining bright. I will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for my voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you. I hope that your night is filled with everything you need to do & want to do. I know you will have adventures & lessons to learn as well. Come visit Mom tonight if you can. I miss you like crazy. No words can describe just how much I do but I know you feel it in your soul & that is all that matters to Mom. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the would. To infinity & beyond. Mom will also be looking at the sunset that you will " paint " me tonight. Hope it is a pretty one. Good night my sweet precious son & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, July 25, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? Mom is going to probably make this letter quick as I just got done studying for the day with reading 2 chapters & taking 1 exam, plus doing another exam that I just need to go over before submitting tomorrow morning. My reason for a short letter is that it is almost 6 pm & I haven't fed the pups yet, haven't started dinner for Mark & I & we are about to get the severe thunderstorms that they were alerting us with all afternoon. It is getting darker by the minute. Anyways..... I am sorry that I didn't write to you this weekend but boy was it busy. I knew I wouldn't be able to on Saturday but I thought I could Sunday but nope...Mom was so exhausted from the 2 days that I fell asleep on the couch at around 6 pm & woke up for an hour or so, then I headed to bed where I slept for most of the night. I was surprised but I know I needed it so badly. I am getting too old for this stuff...lol!
I did speak to Grandpa on Saturday afternoon & I got to speak to Grammy as well. She sounded good. Just makes me sad on the things that she said. She doesn't want to be there anymore. She would rather be on the outside looking in & things of that nature. I wish there was something we could do but we can't. Please just watch over her for Mom. Thank you. I didn't chat with Meme at all but if the weather holds out tonight I may give her a call. Aunt Beck will be back from camping tomorrow I believe so I am sure I will be chatting with her later this week. Mark has a busy work week & Mom will too...studying & taking exams like crazy! The weekend was fun & we all had a good time. Marion & Charlie arrived around 3 pm, we let them rest for a bit & then we headed out to catch the boat ride into Boston. The boat was crowded on the ride there & the weather was so humid & muggy. It was 97 degrees. We arrived in the city around 5:30 pm & walked around, went into some shops & then watched a really cool street performer. You would have really liked him. He was funny & talented. Later we walked around some more & then when to dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe. Got out of there late & by that time it was dark. The city was so pretty with all the lights & boats. We hopped on the boat to bring us back around 10 pm. The weather finally cooled off 7 the ride back was amazing. The breeze, the smell of the ocean, all the lights...it was so pretty. There were a bunch of stars out but no moon. I thought of you the whole time. How much you would have loved it. We all arrived back here at 11 pm....rested for a an hour or so & then headed to bed. Not much sleep as we all woke up around 6:30 am Sunday morning. Lounged around for a few hours & then went to the ocean. We walked the beach for a bit. Mom went out on the rocks while everyone else stayed behind. When I returned there was a feather on my flip flop. I whispered to you, did you hear Mom? I automatically said your name & took a picture of it. Made me tear up. Made me smile, did you see that? I sure hope so. After walking the beach we decided to go for fresh seafood. OMG....Tyler it was so delicious. It was mouth watering. Again, you would have loved it. After that we came back to the apartment & hung out for a bit before they had to leave. Marion & Charlie took off around 4 pm. Mom did the laundry with the towels & sheets & cleaned up a little....after that ...I sat on the couch & I was done....didn't talk to anyone or did anything.... I was tired! That was the whole weekend. Good times with great friends. Just wished you were here with Mom so we could have shared it together. I know you were with me but you know what I am trying to say.
Mom has a few daily prayers to write so I need to start them now as I am hearing thunder already...yikes.... July 23~ Who rises up for me against the wicked? Who stands up for me against evildoers? Dear Lord, grant me courage to stand up for what is right, true, good, even if no one else will join me. Help me not waver or become afraid of opposition. Uphold & establish me in your Word & your ways. I am not strong, but in strength I can do all things. For your honor & glory, not my own, I pray. Amen. To do what is right to side with the truth of God. And never doubt it, the truth of God will always prevail. Evil may cause setbacks & it may hamper the steady march of God's plan but it is ultimately powerless to stop it. To do what is right is to join the winning side of the fight though the battle will not be without pain or struggle. Amen.
July 24~ The Lord loves those who hate evil; he guards the lives of his faithful; he rescues them from the hand of the wicked. The presence of evil in the world, Lord, is often used as an argument against your existence, but your Word tells me that while evil plagues humanity as a result of our wrong choices, you remain thoroughly good. I know you promise to establish good once & for all at the end of time, but for now, as evil & good coexist on earth, help me embrace that which is good, while turning away from what is evil. Today, as you call me to walk in your righteousness, may I respond with a willing heart. By your grace, I pray. Amen. Those who belong to God share his delight in what is good, his disdain for what is wicked & his love for all people. Amen.
July 25~ Mighty King, lover of justice, you have established equity; you have executed justice & righteousness. Sovereign Lord, vindicate me when I have borne injustices but even more importantly, remind me to speak & act in ways that are just & equitable towards others. Help me give people the same respect & right dealings I desire in my interactions with them. In that way, I can reflect your own character that loves what is just, right, & fair. The deeds we do, the words we say, into still air they seem to fleet. We count them ever past; but they shall last, in the dread judgment they & we shall meet. Amen.
Mom is all caught up once again. The sky is sunny on one side & dark on the other so I know the storms are coming & fast. Mom is hoping that you have a wonderful evening. May it be filled with all the things you need to do & want to do. May there be many adventures as well while I sleep tonight. Hope you will come visit me if you can. I miss you so much...more then words can say & I love you to infinity & beyond. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are my hero, my wind beneath my wings. Forever will be be & stay in my heart, mind & soul. Remember that forever. I need to go for now but I will whisper to you as I always do tonight. Be listening out for Mom. Smile & I will too. Good night, Tyler & sweet dreams to you, my sweet precious son. Big hugs & kisses to you, Max & Snickers.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? Mom is going to probably make this letter quick as I just got done studying for the day with reading 2 chapters & taking 1 exam, plus doing another exam that I just need to go over before submitting tomorrow morning. My reason for a short letter is that it is almost 6 pm & I haven't fed the pups yet, haven't started dinner for Mark & I & we are about to get the severe thunderstorms that they were alerting us with all afternoon. It is getting darker by the minute. Anyways..... I am sorry that I didn't write to you this weekend but boy was it busy. I knew I wouldn't be able to on Saturday but I thought I could Sunday but nope...Mom was so exhausted from the 2 days that I fell asleep on the couch at around 6 pm & woke up for an hour or so, then I headed to bed where I slept for most of the night. I was surprised but I know I needed it so badly. I am getting too old for this stuff...lol!
I did speak to Grandpa on Saturday afternoon & I got to speak to Grammy as well. She sounded good. Just makes me sad on the things that she said. She doesn't want to be there anymore. She would rather be on the outside looking in & things of that nature. I wish there was something we could do but we can't. Please just watch over her for Mom. Thank you. I didn't chat with Meme at all but if the weather holds out tonight I may give her a call. Aunt Beck will be back from camping tomorrow I believe so I am sure I will be chatting with her later this week. Mark has a busy work week & Mom will too...studying & taking exams like crazy! The weekend was fun & we all had a good time. Marion & Charlie arrived around 3 pm, we let them rest for a bit & then we headed out to catch the boat ride into Boston. The boat was crowded on the ride there & the weather was so humid & muggy. It was 97 degrees. We arrived in the city around 5:30 pm & walked around, went into some shops & then watched a really cool street performer. You would have really liked him. He was funny & talented. Later we walked around some more & then when to dinner at the Hard Rock Cafe. Got out of there late & by that time it was dark. The city was so pretty with all the lights & boats. We hopped on the boat to bring us back around 10 pm. The weather finally cooled off 7 the ride back was amazing. The breeze, the smell of the ocean, all the lights...it was so pretty. There were a bunch of stars out but no moon. I thought of you the whole time. How much you would have loved it. We all arrived back here at 11 pm....rested for a an hour or so & then headed to bed. Not much sleep as we all woke up around 6:30 am Sunday morning. Lounged around for a few hours & then went to the ocean. We walked the beach for a bit. Mom went out on the rocks while everyone else stayed behind. When I returned there was a feather on my flip flop. I whispered to you, did you hear Mom? I automatically said your name & took a picture of it. Made me tear up. Made me smile, did you see that? I sure hope so. After walking the beach we decided to go for fresh seafood. OMG....Tyler it was so delicious. It was mouth watering. Again, you would have loved it. After that we came back to the apartment & hung out for a bit before they had to leave. Marion & Charlie took off around 4 pm. Mom did the laundry with the towels & sheets & cleaned up a little....after that ...I sat on the couch & I was done....didn't talk to anyone or did anything.... I was tired! That was the whole weekend. Good times with great friends. Just wished you were here with Mom so we could have shared it together. I know you were with me but you know what I am trying to say.
Mom has a few daily prayers to write so I need to start them now as I am hearing thunder already...yikes.... July 23~ Who rises up for me against the wicked? Who stands up for me against evildoers? Dear Lord, grant me courage to stand up for what is right, true, good, even if no one else will join me. Help me not waver or become afraid of opposition. Uphold & establish me in your Word & your ways. I am not strong, but in strength I can do all things. For your honor & glory, not my own, I pray. Amen. To do what is right to side with the truth of God. And never doubt it, the truth of God will always prevail. Evil may cause setbacks & it may hamper the steady march of God's plan but it is ultimately powerless to stop it. To do what is right is to join the winning side of the fight though the battle will not be without pain or struggle. Amen.
July 24~ The Lord loves those who hate evil; he guards the lives of his faithful; he rescues them from the hand of the wicked. The presence of evil in the world, Lord, is often used as an argument against your existence, but your Word tells me that while evil plagues humanity as a result of our wrong choices, you remain thoroughly good. I know you promise to establish good once & for all at the end of time, but for now, as evil & good coexist on earth, help me embrace that which is good, while turning away from what is evil. Today, as you call me to walk in your righteousness, may I respond with a willing heart. By your grace, I pray. Amen. Those who belong to God share his delight in what is good, his disdain for what is wicked & his love for all people. Amen.
July 25~ Mighty King, lover of justice, you have established equity; you have executed justice & righteousness. Sovereign Lord, vindicate me when I have borne injustices but even more importantly, remind me to speak & act in ways that are just & equitable towards others. Help me give people the same respect & right dealings I desire in my interactions with them. In that way, I can reflect your own character that loves what is just, right, & fair. The deeds we do, the words we say, into still air they seem to fleet. We count them ever past; but they shall last, in the dread judgment they & we shall meet. Amen.
Mom is all caught up once again. The sky is sunny on one side & dark on the other so I know the storms are coming & fast. Mom is hoping that you have a wonderful evening. May it be filled with all the things you need to do & want to do. May there be many adventures as well while I sleep tonight. Hope you will come visit me if you can. I miss you so much...more then words can say & I love you to infinity & beyond. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are my hero, my wind beneath my wings. Forever will be be & stay in my heart, mind & soul. Remember that forever. I need to go for now but I will whisper to you as I always do tonight. Be listening out for Mom. Smile & I will too. Good night, Tyler & sweet dreams to you, my sweet precious son. Big hugs & kisses to you, Max & Snickers.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Friday, July 22, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Friday night? Mom is really sorry that I did not write to you last night but all day yesterday I was in bed. I was tired & did not feel good. I didn't do anything not even school work or make dinner. Mark ordered out for us & all I did was chat on the phone really quick to Meme & Grandpa. It just was not a good day for Mom at all. For some reason I am having a hard time lately. I am just not myself. Maybe it is because it will be your Birthday in 7 days...actually a week from today you would have been turning 26 years old. Guess this is just a tough time for your Momma right now. Anything you can do to help me through this will be greatly appreciated. Thank you, pumpkin.
Today has been a better day for me but still not up to where I normally am. I am just really quiet lately. Many friends have noticed & have mentioned it to me. I know they are right but I just don't know what to say as it is true. Maybe in the next few days it can be better. I wanted to let you know that I will not be writing to you tomorrow night but will try to write in the morning or afternoon as Marion & Charlie are coming down for visit. We are going to head out for some fun time with shopping, dinner & drinks. I think we will be getting in pretty late. If I don't write to you Saturday then I will be writing to you on Sunday with telling you how it went & the adventures we had. Mom does not have any updates for you but maybe I will on Sunday as well. I do however have a couple daily prayers to catch up on again for you so here they are.
July 21~ But I, O Lord,cry out to you; in the morning my prayer comes before you. When I wake up with my needs standing before me, Lord, standing right where I left them when I fell asleep, let let prayer be my first response. As I lift my soul to you right now, let me continue to lift it all day long. From the time my alarm clock sounds to get up to the time I set it again at bedtime, may my prayers rise up to you as though in a continual conversation with a beloved friend, for that is what you have called me---your beloved & your friend. My love returns to you today as I seek you & consult you in all things. Our spiritual need to pray is comparable to our physical need to breathe. Amen.
July 22~ Turn, O Lord! How long? Have compassion on your servants! It is oftentimes a small thing which casts me down & troubles me.... Strengthen me with heavenly fortitude, lest the old man, the miserable flesh, not fully subject to the spirit, prevail & get the upper hand, against which we must fight as long as we breathe in this most wretched life. When life seems unbearable, sometimes the best thing we can do is stop trying to bear it ourselves & cast ourselves, headlong with our circumstances, on God. This is not " escapism " or denial; it is simply faith in action. Amen.
Well the night sky is upon us early tonight & there is nothing to be seen in the sky. The sky is dark but nothing is shining. Actually Mom is going to be closing this letter to you very quickly as we are getting some lightning & thunder at this time. Looks like we could be in for some severe thunderstorms tonight & tomorrow night. Mom is hoping that you will have a wonderful night filled with adventures of your own & things that you need to do & want to do. Come visit with me if you can tonight when I sleep. I need you, Tyler. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for me. I will smile & i hope you do as well. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. To infinity & beyond. You are my hero, my wind beneath my wings & forever will you be in my heart, mind & soul. Good night, Ty & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Friday night? Mom is really sorry that I did not write to you last night but all day yesterday I was in bed. I was tired & did not feel good. I didn't do anything not even school work or make dinner. Mark ordered out for us & all I did was chat on the phone really quick to Meme & Grandpa. It just was not a good day for Mom at all. For some reason I am having a hard time lately. I am just not myself. Maybe it is because it will be your Birthday in 7 days...actually a week from today you would have been turning 26 years old. Guess this is just a tough time for your Momma right now. Anything you can do to help me through this will be greatly appreciated. Thank you, pumpkin.
Today has been a better day for me but still not up to where I normally am. I am just really quiet lately. Many friends have noticed & have mentioned it to me. I know they are right but I just don't know what to say as it is true. Maybe in the next few days it can be better. I wanted to let you know that I will not be writing to you tomorrow night but will try to write in the morning or afternoon as Marion & Charlie are coming down for visit. We are going to head out for some fun time with shopping, dinner & drinks. I think we will be getting in pretty late. If I don't write to you Saturday then I will be writing to you on Sunday with telling you how it went & the adventures we had. Mom does not have any updates for you but maybe I will on Sunday as well. I do however have a couple daily prayers to catch up on again for you so here they are.
July 21~ But I, O Lord,cry out to you; in the morning my prayer comes before you. When I wake up with my needs standing before me, Lord, standing right where I left them when I fell asleep, let let prayer be my first response. As I lift my soul to you right now, let me continue to lift it all day long. From the time my alarm clock sounds to get up to the time I set it again at bedtime, may my prayers rise up to you as though in a continual conversation with a beloved friend, for that is what you have called me---your beloved & your friend. My love returns to you today as I seek you & consult you in all things. Our spiritual need to pray is comparable to our physical need to breathe. Amen.
July 22~ Turn, O Lord! How long? Have compassion on your servants! It is oftentimes a small thing which casts me down & troubles me.... Strengthen me with heavenly fortitude, lest the old man, the miserable flesh, not fully subject to the spirit, prevail & get the upper hand, against which we must fight as long as we breathe in this most wretched life. When life seems unbearable, sometimes the best thing we can do is stop trying to bear it ourselves & cast ourselves, headlong with our circumstances, on God. This is not " escapism " or denial; it is simply faith in action. Amen.
Well the night sky is upon us early tonight & there is nothing to be seen in the sky. The sky is dark but nothing is shining. Actually Mom is going to be closing this letter to you very quickly as we are getting some lightning & thunder at this time. Looks like we could be in for some severe thunderstorms tonight & tomorrow night. Mom is hoping that you will have a wonderful night filled with adventures of your own & things that you need to do & want to do. Come visit with me if you can tonight when I sleep. I need you, Tyler. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so be listening for me. I will smile & i hope you do as well. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. To infinity & beyond. You are my hero, my wind beneath my wings & forever will you be in my heart, mind & soul. Good night, Ty & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Wednesday, July 20, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is doing ok. I am going to be leaving in an hour & I am going to a paint night like Mom did back in March. We will be painting a sunset so I know you will be with Mom giving me all kinds of pointers & directions as this is right up your alley. Hope I can make you proud. I am so sorry that I didn't write to you last night but I was pretty upset. I had every intention on writing but something was said to Mom that made me very upset & angry. It wasn't the person who told me that upset & hurt me, it was someone else. I can understand that people can dislike others but being disrespectful is a whole other story. Anyone can say stuff about me or others but when it is turned to you I have an issue with it & my claws will come out. No one will disrespect you at any time. Never happened when you were with me here & it certainly won't happen now. I am your protector. I know you know what was said & I know you will frown upon it but you would laugh it off & tell me to let it go. I would any other time but this person just needs to learn a lesson & needs to be put in her place. I think that time is now. Enough of that subject.....
Today was a good day for me. I submitted 5 exams for my classes & I received all 100's on them. I was super excited. I will be doing another one tomorrow. I hope you are so proud of Mom. Thanks to you pumpkin I am doing all this. Mom got to speak to Meme last night & Grandpa today. All is well there with them. That was so good to hear. Aunt Beck is still camping until the 25th & I will chat with her when they return. Thanks for watching over us all like you do. It means so much to Mom. Mom's friend had his court date & things went better than expected for him so that was awesome news to hear too. Think that is all I have for the time being so here are the daily prayers that I need to catch up on.
July 19~ Teach me your way, O Lord, that I may walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart to revere your name. My Lord, the things that tempt my heart away from undivided devotion to you are the things of this world that offer temporary comfort, pleasure, or a boost to my ego. It's when I turn to these things for what I need instead of to you that I put them in place they do not belong. Please make me aware of the ways in which I am fashioning idols out of other things, whether out of your kind provisions or things expressly forbidden. Turn my heart fully toward you so that my way may not be darkened by deceptiveness of false ways. If a house divided against itself cannot stand, neither can a divided heart keep to a single purpose. Amen.
July 20 ~ I will walk with integrity of heart within my house; I will not set before my eyes anything that is base. I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessings on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest & Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! May we, as individuals, adopt this prayer for our own homes. For there is no house of government that can ever be as influential as our family homes are, nor can what transpires in government mansions be as important as what is modeled, taught & " caught " within the sacred walls of our own households. Amen.
Mom is all caught up right now. The sky is looking like it will be a lovely sunset. I am hoping so. I will whisper to you tonight as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear Mom & I will smile as well. May your night be everything you need & want it to be. Many adventures to you as I sleep tonight. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. I miss you beyond any words could ever express. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings.
Its time for me to go paint! Wish me luck...lol! Come visit me in my dreams tonight if you can. Good night my sweet precious son. Sweet dreams, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? Mom is doing ok. I am going to be leaving in an hour & I am going to a paint night like Mom did back in March. We will be painting a sunset so I know you will be with Mom giving me all kinds of pointers & directions as this is right up your alley. Hope I can make you proud. I am so sorry that I didn't write to you last night but I was pretty upset. I had every intention on writing but something was said to Mom that made me very upset & angry. It wasn't the person who told me that upset & hurt me, it was someone else. I can understand that people can dislike others but being disrespectful is a whole other story. Anyone can say stuff about me or others but when it is turned to you I have an issue with it & my claws will come out. No one will disrespect you at any time. Never happened when you were with me here & it certainly won't happen now. I am your protector. I know you know what was said & I know you will frown upon it but you would laugh it off & tell me to let it go. I would any other time but this person just needs to learn a lesson & needs to be put in her place. I think that time is now. Enough of that subject.....
Today was a good day for me. I submitted 5 exams for my classes & I received all 100's on them. I was super excited. I will be doing another one tomorrow. I hope you are so proud of Mom. Thanks to you pumpkin I am doing all this. Mom got to speak to Meme last night & Grandpa today. All is well there with them. That was so good to hear. Aunt Beck is still camping until the 25th & I will chat with her when they return. Thanks for watching over us all like you do. It means so much to Mom. Mom's friend had his court date & things went better than expected for him so that was awesome news to hear too. Think that is all I have for the time being so here are the daily prayers that I need to catch up on.
July 19~ Teach me your way, O Lord, that I may walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart to revere your name. My Lord, the things that tempt my heart away from undivided devotion to you are the things of this world that offer temporary comfort, pleasure, or a boost to my ego. It's when I turn to these things for what I need instead of to you that I put them in place they do not belong. Please make me aware of the ways in which I am fashioning idols out of other things, whether out of your kind provisions or things expressly forbidden. Turn my heart fully toward you so that my way may not be darkened by deceptiveness of false ways. If a house divided against itself cannot stand, neither can a divided heart keep to a single purpose. Amen.
July 20 ~ I will walk with integrity of heart within my house; I will not set before my eyes anything that is base. I Pray Heaven to Bestow The Best of Blessings on THIS HOUSE, and on ALL that shall hereafter Inhabit it. May none but Honest & Wise Men ever rule under This Roof! May we, as individuals, adopt this prayer for our own homes. For there is no house of government that can ever be as influential as our family homes are, nor can what transpires in government mansions be as important as what is modeled, taught & " caught " within the sacred walls of our own households. Amen.
Mom is all caught up right now. The sky is looking like it will be a lovely sunset. I am hoping so. I will whisper to you tonight as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear Mom & I will smile as well. May your night be everything you need & want it to be. Many adventures to you as I sleep tonight. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. I miss you beyond any words could ever express. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings.
Its time for me to go paint! Wish me luck...lol! Come visit me in my dreams tonight if you can. Good night my sweet precious son. Sweet dreams, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, July 18, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you on this Monday afternoon? Mom is writing to you now because as I am typing this to you we are headed for getting a really bad thunder & lightning storm. It is already raining & the thunder is pretty good. It is also getting darker by the minute. The weather channel called for some severe storms & looks like they were correct with that. Hope it is a quick one as Mom is still studying. I took an exam earlier. 56 questions 7 took me 20 minutes to do it. Not bad, huh? I am now working on the introduction to Patient Care. There are lots of things I already knew but some things I didn't while I cared for you. I think I will do well on this 2nd chapter of this course. I know that you are with me still every step of the way & I thank you so much my sweet precious son. It is because of you that I have done so well up to this point.
So Mom just had to take a quick break from writing to you as the storm was so intense that I wanted to see it & went out on the balcony to video it a bit...Mom is now soaked...lol. I also had to hold Ozzy as he was scared of the thunder. Poor little guy. The storm is pretty much over now. It lasted about 20 minutes & it is getting lighter outside now. I remember that you hated them so much & you had every right to. It was scary for Mom as well. I wonder if you are still afraid of it or if you think differently of them now. So many things I wonder about & are curious of. I hope to get a reading done fairly soon so maybe you can help me out with some of my questions. I will let you know as that gets closer.
Last night Mom got to chat with Grandpa & Debbie for a bit. Things are good. Grammy is still having a few bad days. Makes me sad still but I know she will get better. Just takes time...just like every thing else. Aunt Beck texted me last night to let me know that her & John will be headed to Maine for some camping. They will be back on the 25th. I believe that Bean & her husband are with them as well for a few days. I know they will have a good time. You should go visit with them if you can. I know they would love it. I will chat with Meme tomorrow or the next day to see how things are. We skyped with Tubal & Karen last night. They are doing well. Tubal sounds so much better but did have another scare last week. We worry about them. They need to take it easy & they don't. They both are so sweet. I know you would like them. They would love you. My friend told me to tell you hello again. He is doing good. He got wonderful news last week & Mom is so happy for him. It is such a relief for him & that is just what was needed. He is just a great guy that keeps getting sh*t on by so many.....now I hope with this news he can see the light at the end of the tunnel & he can do something for himself. He deserves it. I hope that when he reads this letter he knows just how awesome he is. I know he doesn't hear that nearly enough by his loved ones but I hope he knows he is & that he is so special to Mom. That is all the updates I have for you right now. I know there will be more later in the week as today is only Monday. I do have your daily prayer for the day though. Here it is:
July 18~ Surely his salvation is at hand for those who fear him, that his glory may dwell in our land. Almighty God....bless our land with honourable industry, sound learning & pure manners. Save us from violence, discord, & confusion; from pride & arrogancy & from every evil way. Defend our liberties & fashion into one united people the multitudes brought hither out of many kindreds & tongues. Endure with the spirit of wisdom those to whom in Thy name we entrust the authority of government, that there may be justice & peace at home & that through obedience to Thy law, we may show forth Thy praise among the nations of the earth. In the time of prosperity, fill our hearts with thankfulness & in the day of trouble, suffer not our trust in Thee to fail. Amen. We cannot earn God's favor, but God is pleased to bless those who seek to honor him. Amen.
Well, the storm is finally over for now. There may be more later on but this one has passed us now. The clouds are still heavy & the blue skies & sun are gone. I don't think I will be seeing anything later in the sky. The moon last night was so bight. I smile & whispered to you. Did you hear Mom? I will do it again tonight as well. I hope your night is all that you want it to be with learning, helping others, adventures to go on, etc.... while I sleep tonight. Come visit with Mom. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Continue to fly high & free. Watch over us all. Thanks Tyler. Good night & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you on this Monday afternoon? Mom is writing to you now because as I am typing this to you we are headed for getting a really bad thunder & lightning storm. It is already raining & the thunder is pretty good. It is also getting darker by the minute. The weather channel called for some severe storms & looks like they were correct with that. Hope it is a quick one as Mom is still studying. I took an exam earlier. 56 questions 7 took me 20 minutes to do it. Not bad, huh? I am now working on the introduction to Patient Care. There are lots of things I already knew but some things I didn't while I cared for you. I think I will do well on this 2nd chapter of this course. I know that you are with me still every step of the way & I thank you so much my sweet precious son. It is because of you that I have done so well up to this point.
So Mom just had to take a quick break from writing to you as the storm was so intense that I wanted to see it & went out on the balcony to video it a bit...Mom is now soaked...lol. I also had to hold Ozzy as he was scared of the thunder. Poor little guy. The storm is pretty much over now. It lasted about 20 minutes & it is getting lighter outside now. I remember that you hated them so much & you had every right to. It was scary for Mom as well. I wonder if you are still afraid of it or if you think differently of them now. So many things I wonder about & are curious of. I hope to get a reading done fairly soon so maybe you can help me out with some of my questions. I will let you know as that gets closer.
Last night Mom got to chat with Grandpa & Debbie for a bit. Things are good. Grammy is still having a few bad days. Makes me sad still but I know she will get better. Just takes time...just like every thing else. Aunt Beck texted me last night to let me know that her & John will be headed to Maine for some camping. They will be back on the 25th. I believe that Bean & her husband are with them as well for a few days. I know they will have a good time. You should go visit with them if you can. I know they would love it. I will chat with Meme tomorrow or the next day to see how things are. We skyped with Tubal & Karen last night. They are doing well. Tubal sounds so much better but did have another scare last week. We worry about them. They need to take it easy & they don't. They both are so sweet. I know you would like them. They would love you. My friend told me to tell you hello again. He is doing good. He got wonderful news last week & Mom is so happy for him. It is such a relief for him & that is just what was needed. He is just a great guy that keeps getting sh*t on by so many.....now I hope with this news he can see the light at the end of the tunnel & he can do something for himself. He deserves it. I hope that when he reads this letter he knows just how awesome he is. I know he doesn't hear that nearly enough by his loved ones but I hope he knows he is & that he is so special to Mom. That is all the updates I have for you right now. I know there will be more later in the week as today is only Monday. I do have your daily prayer for the day though. Here it is:
July 18~ Surely his salvation is at hand for those who fear him, that his glory may dwell in our land. Almighty God....bless our land with honourable industry, sound learning & pure manners. Save us from violence, discord, & confusion; from pride & arrogancy & from every evil way. Defend our liberties & fashion into one united people the multitudes brought hither out of many kindreds & tongues. Endure with the spirit of wisdom those to whom in Thy name we entrust the authority of government, that there may be justice & peace at home & that through obedience to Thy law, we may show forth Thy praise among the nations of the earth. In the time of prosperity, fill our hearts with thankfulness & in the day of trouble, suffer not our trust in Thee to fail. Amen. We cannot earn God's favor, but God is pleased to bless those who seek to honor him. Amen.
Well, the storm is finally over for now. There may be more later on but this one has passed us now. The clouds are still heavy & the blue skies & sun are gone. I don't think I will be seeing anything later in the sky. The moon last night was so bight. I smile & whispered to you. Did you hear Mom? I will do it again tonight as well. I hope your night is all that you want it to be with learning, helping others, adventures to go on, etc.... while I sleep tonight. Come visit with Mom. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Continue to fly high & free. Watch over us all. Thanks Tyler. Good night & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Sunday, July 17, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this beautiful & sunny Sunday evening? Mom is doing the best she can. I am sorry that I did not write to you last night but after the busy day we had yesterday & it was the anniversary date of losing Max I didn't think it would be good for Mom to write. It just would have been all sad & emotional & I don't think you would have wanted Mom to write in that condition. I hope Max is doing well with you. I know you are taking care of him, Snickers, Daisy, Baxter, Snapples & Ziggy for me & Meme. I know that you are spoiling them as much as you can because you really couldn't do that here in the physical world. They all loved you so much. Please give them all big hugs & kisses from Mom & tell them I love & miss them bunches. Thanks Tyler.
I know I was telling you about the terrorist attack that happened the other day in Nice, France. The fatality count is 84 & 10 of those were children. Today, it was announced that there was another shooting here in the United States. This time it was Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Mom & Mark were there 2 summers ago. We traveled there from Texas for a work assignment for Mark. Snickers & I got to go as well. Such nice folks there. My heart goes out to them as well. All this is just so terrible. I know that the ISIS Military came forward & said it was them for the attack in Nice, France but not sure about this new one. I don't have many details about it. I just know my heart is sad & broken for more families that have to go through what I do every day. Life is just so cruel at times, but you know this.
Today was a low key day for us here. Mom did laundry, gave the pups baths, & did other housework....little things. I got a chance to do some things on the computer as well. Mark played his online game with his 2 brothers & enjoyed the down time as well. This week went by slow but it kinda sucked & was pretty busy. Later we have a skype call with Tubal & Karen & then it will be time to relax & go to bed so that we can start the work/college week all over again. I did get to speak with Meme & Grandpa last night. Things are good with them but Grandpa told me that Grammy was having a bad day. She was crying & saying she didn't want to be at the nursing home anymore. That made me so sad to hear. She lived on her own for so long & always had friends & family over & now it is tough to go see her daily & she is lonely. She is pretty much blind & can't really hear that well anymore, plus dementia has set in. She has her good days & her bad days. Please continue to watch over her & all of us as I know you do. It means a lot to Mom that you can do that where I can't. Thank you my sweet precious son.
I have 2 daily prayers to write to you so here they are. July 16~ For the Lord God is a sun & shield; he bestows favor & honor: No good thing does the Lord withhold from those who walk uprightly. Lord God, help me walk uprightly today---not to impress anyone else or to make myself feel morally superior to those around me. Help me walk uprightly that I might enjoy fellowship with you as you intend it so that nothing may hinder our joy of communing together throughout the day. If others see your light shining in me, may they be drawn to you. If your blessing comes through an act of love or obedience, give me a thankful heart that you have upheld me in your righteousness. Grant me true humility as you teach me to walk in your ways. It is because you are good that I can walk with you. Thank you for all of your blessings! Attribute to God all that is good & walk in his goodness as in the light of a beacon to which you can quickly point if someone notices how bright your way is. Amen.
July 17~ Let me hear what God the Lord will speak, for he will speak peace to his people, to his faithful, to those who turn to him in their hearts. My Lord, teach me to listen. The times are noisy & my ears are weary with the thousand raucous sounds which continuously assault them....Let me hear Thee speaking in my heart. Let me get used to the sounds of Thy voice, that its tones may be familiar away & the only sound will be the music of Thy speaking voice. Amen. If I should stop to listen to God for one minute in each waking hour of the day, I would be devoting 16 minutes a day to hearing the voice of God. Is there a quarter-hour block of time in my day I could devote to listening to God, even if on the some days he chooses to sit with me in silence? Amen.
Ok, Tyler....Mom is all caught up. It is that time of day for us to sit down to dinner. I have to get going for now but don't think for a minute that you are not on my mind. I know you saw Mom tear up today when I heard a song. I blew you a kiss while looking at your picture. It was just one of those moments. Please forgive me. I know you don't like seeing me that way. I hope that your evening is filled with all that you need it to be, want it to be & many adventures along the way as well while I sleep tonight. Come see me if you can. Later I will look to the sky to see the stars & moon shining bright. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for Mom. I will smile if you will! I miss you so much & I love you like crazy. I love you with all I have. From my heart, mind & soul is where you will forever stay. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this beautiful & sunny Sunday evening? Mom is doing the best she can. I am sorry that I did not write to you last night but after the busy day we had yesterday & it was the anniversary date of losing Max I didn't think it would be good for Mom to write. It just would have been all sad & emotional & I don't think you would have wanted Mom to write in that condition. I hope Max is doing well with you. I know you are taking care of him, Snickers, Daisy, Baxter, Snapples & Ziggy for me & Meme. I know that you are spoiling them as much as you can because you really couldn't do that here in the physical world. They all loved you so much. Please give them all big hugs & kisses from Mom & tell them I love & miss them bunches. Thanks Tyler.
I know I was telling you about the terrorist attack that happened the other day in Nice, France. The fatality count is 84 & 10 of those were children. Today, it was announced that there was another shooting here in the United States. This time it was Baton Rouge, Louisiana. Mom & Mark were there 2 summers ago. We traveled there from Texas for a work assignment for Mark. Snickers & I got to go as well. Such nice folks there. My heart goes out to them as well. All this is just so terrible. I know that the ISIS Military came forward & said it was them for the attack in Nice, France but not sure about this new one. I don't have many details about it. I just know my heart is sad & broken for more families that have to go through what I do every day. Life is just so cruel at times, but you know this.
Today was a low key day for us here. Mom did laundry, gave the pups baths, & did other housework....little things. I got a chance to do some things on the computer as well. Mark played his online game with his 2 brothers & enjoyed the down time as well. This week went by slow but it kinda sucked & was pretty busy. Later we have a skype call with Tubal & Karen & then it will be time to relax & go to bed so that we can start the work/college week all over again. I did get to speak with Meme & Grandpa last night. Things are good with them but Grandpa told me that Grammy was having a bad day. She was crying & saying she didn't want to be at the nursing home anymore. That made me so sad to hear. She lived on her own for so long & always had friends & family over & now it is tough to go see her daily & she is lonely. She is pretty much blind & can't really hear that well anymore, plus dementia has set in. She has her good days & her bad days. Please continue to watch over her & all of us as I know you do. It means a lot to Mom that you can do that where I can't. Thank you my sweet precious son.
I have 2 daily prayers to write to you so here they are. July 16~ For the Lord God is a sun & shield; he bestows favor & honor: No good thing does the Lord withhold from those who walk uprightly. Lord God, help me walk uprightly today---not to impress anyone else or to make myself feel morally superior to those around me. Help me walk uprightly that I might enjoy fellowship with you as you intend it so that nothing may hinder our joy of communing together throughout the day. If others see your light shining in me, may they be drawn to you. If your blessing comes through an act of love or obedience, give me a thankful heart that you have upheld me in your righteousness. Grant me true humility as you teach me to walk in your ways. It is because you are good that I can walk with you. Thank you for all of your blessings! Attribute to God all that is good & walk in his goodness as in the light of a beacon to which you can quickly point if someone notices how bright your way is. Amen.
July 17~ Let me hear what God the Lord will speak, for he will speak peace to his people, to his faithful, to those who turn to him in their hearts. My Lord, teach me to listen. The times are noisy & my ears are weary with the thousand raucous sounds which continuously assault them....Let me hear Thee speaking in my heart. Let me get used to the sounds of Thy voice, that its tones may be familiar away & the only sound will be the music of Thy speaking voice. Amen. If I should stop to listen to God for one minute in each waking hour of the day, I would be devoting 16 minutes a day to hearing the voice of God. Is there a quarter-hour block of time in my day I could devote to listening to God, even if on the some days he chooses to sit with me in silence? Amen.
Ok, Tyler....Mom is all caught up. It is that time of day for us to sit down to dinner. I have to get going for now but don't think for a minute that you are not on my mind. I know you saw Mom tear up today when I heard a song. I blew you a kiss while looking at your picture. It was just one of those moments. Please forgive me. I know you don't like seeing me that way. I hope that your evening is filled with all that you need it to be, want it to be & many adventures along the way as well while I sleep tonight. Come see me if you can. Later I will look to the sky to see the stars & moon shining bright. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for Mom. I will smile if you will! I miss you so much & I love you like crazy. I love you with all I have. From my heart, mind & soul is where you will forever stay. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler & sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Friday, July 15, 2016
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