Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing today on this Tuesday afternoon? Mom is doing ok but at this time not really feeling so hot. My head was hurting me really bad earlier & now I am just so tired & drained. Mom will be getting off the computer after writing your letter & just relaxing for the night. Think it will be an early night tonight as again for the 3rd night in a row I didn't really sleep. 
 Today has been a pretty quiet day for me. I haven't done anything really. Just enjoying the down time right now that is for sure. I haven't had that in several months so that is such a nice change for now. I know in a couple days that will change again & my " down " days will become fewer & fewer. That's ok though as I am excited to start this new journey & become a full time college student yet again for the next 16 months. I know that I will do well because you will be right by my side. I thank you for that really because if it wasn't for you pumpkin, Mom would not have the knowledge that I do. I hope I am making you proud by what I am doing. I hope you are smiling & saying " My Mom is growing up " just like you always said to me. You made me smile & laugh when I heard those words. Damn.... I miss you so much. More & more every day that goes by. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are still my everything & always will be. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my ultimate hero & Mom's wind beneath my wings. Never forget this....ever!
 Today, Meme called Mom to tell her that one of my friend's Mom passed away this morning. She had been ill for a few months now & I guess things had taken a turn for the worst. It is very sad. Her name was Shirley. May she rest in eternal peace now & fly high with the Angels above. Meme & Grandpa were friends with her & worked with her at Rugers. It is another constant reminder that life is so short. One never knows. After loosing you, it is a daily reminder for me. Mom also got to chat with Auntie Kristina. It has been forever since we chatted. Things are well with her & Mark. I will be chatting with her again on Thursday or Friday. I am sure that I will be talking to Grandpa tonight but if not definitely tomorrow night for sure. I will have more updates for you then. Here is your daily prayer for the day.
 July 12~ Restore us O Lord God of hosts; let your face shine, that we may be saved. My Lord, t seems as if the ways of honor & respect, faith & love that we once practiced as a culture have been steadily declining. I pray that even if they are one day completely abandoned, all those who put their trust in you will faithfully walk in your ways & be as lights & sources of goodness to minister your blessing to our neighbors. Forgive us for ways we have compromised & abandoned what we know is right. Save us from our apathy & our affections for things that are opposed to you. Please restore our conscience & our desire to follow you wholeheartedly. In your holy name, I pray. Amen. Restoration may be a process, but the way of restoration is just one step away----a single decision to leave our own path & get in step with God's Spirit. Amen.
 Last night the sunset was pretty but not like ones that I have seen in the past. I am really hoping for an amazing one tonight so that I can take pictures of it. Like I have said to you before I believe that you are painting these for Mom so that you can see me smile. I hope later on to also see the stars & moon shining bright. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice & smile when you hear it. I will do the same. Mom hopes that your night will be filled with many things that you need & want to do. I am sure you will have many adventures along the way as well. Have fun while I am sleeping. Come visit me if you can. The last few nights Mom has had many disturbing & scary nightmares. Please help to take them away from me & not to continue to have these. Help me to have happy & fun dreams again. Thanks Tyler. Good night my sweet precious son. Sweet dreams & know I love you to infinity & beyond.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!