Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Wednesday afternoon? Mom is doing alright. The day is just flying by that is for sure. I did a lot of things this morning. I got some dusting done & Mom rearranged the stuff in the living room. I put away the Fall decorations the other day & Mom put some of the Christmas decorations up today. Mark was telling Mom that he would like to put the Christmas tree up earlier this year so Mom needed to get that all situated so we can do that this weekend. I was thinking we were going to be doing it on Thanksgiving Day but I guess not. I have everything all set up except for the Village that I started last year & the actual Christmas Tree. Mom will be sure to take some pictures of everything & post them on here for you to see. Anyways that took most of the morning & then I got ready & just got done taking the pups for a nice walk. The weather is not really super cold today but it again is overcast & cloudy. The sun was shining this morning but that quickly disappeared. Tomorrow is is suppose to rain again all day long. Please watch over Mark as he has to work the night. He will leave in the afternoon but has to work until late in the evening tomorrow & won't get home much before midnight. Watch over & be with Mom & the pups as well. Thank you my sweet precious son. It means so much to us both. 
 Not much went on last night. Mom got off the computer early & went in the living room & relaxed before I had to start dinner & get the pups fed. No TV was on just Mom relaxing. It was so nice. Dinner & dishes were done quite early last night & it was great! We watched TV for the evening & went to bed around 10 pm. Mom did chat with Debbie for a bit to see how they both were doing. Grandpa was able to get some medicine to help him feel better & he did get some sleep which is better than what he has been getting. Debbie said she was doing okay but her stomach was still giving her grief. I told her that I would call tonight again to check in with them to make sure they are doing well. Please watch over them as well. Mom worries about everyone...you know me! Meme called this morning. We spoke briefly but she said she would call me back later tonight. Mom has not spoken to anyone else lately. Still haven't touched base with Aunt Beck & it has been about 2 1/2 months since I spoke to Bean. Guess she is doing alright. maybe Mom will call Aunt Beck tomorrow evening when Mark is at work. It will give me something to do. Honestly, Mom doesn't talk on the phone much anymore. Nothing like I used to that is. I usually talk with family & that is about it. No friends really call anymore & if they do then it is weeks in between. Guess that is the way it goes these days. Mom is anxious though for New Years. You know that is my favorite holiday & this year we are having people over & having a party. Charlie & Marion will be here along with Mark's friend, Rick & Mom's friend, Christina. It will be the 6 of us adults. We will be having some drinks, eating some yummy food & playing some games. It will be nice to visit with everyone. Mom hasn't seen Marion & Charlie in 7 months. They haven't been here in 14 months. I really hope the weather is good so that everyone can come. It would be such a bummer to not have it happen. Mom will be so sad. That is all that Mom really has for today for updates. More to follow in the next few days. here is a saying for the day though: Your life is in your hands. No matter where you are now, no matter what has happened in your life, you can begin to consciously choose your thoughts & you can change your life. There is no such thing as a hopeless situation. Every single circumstance of your life can change! 
 That saying is so true! Mom needs to really follow this & listen & live those words. There are so many things I want to change in my life. Mom is going to start thinking more positively. Mom is going to start to really work out again like I used to. I am definitely eating better & healthier these days.... I have lost enough weight to go down 2 sizes & I feel good. Mom is going to bed earlier at night & getting up earlier in the morning. Mom drinks lots of water every day but I need to drink other stuff too so that needs to change. Mom is hoping that all these changes will help her in every day life. I think it will. I hope Mom is making you proud. I don't like to be upset & depressed all the time. I miss you so much that sometimes I can't help it... I get into that rut & I can't get out or I have so much trouble getting out of it. I will always miss you. That will never change. You were everything to Mom. You were my life but now I need to live my life the way I am suppose to with you still but just in a different way. You will always guide Mom in a direction that I may need to go by giving me signs along the way. I will watch for them. I will pay closer attention. I promise you that. You will always be my hero & the wind beneath my wings. Forever you will live inside my heart, mind, body & soul. I love you, Tyler. To the moon & back & all the way around the would. You are Mom's shining star! 
 I will whisper to you later tonight as I always do. I lit a candle already & whispered to you. Did you hear Mom? I hope so. Smile later & Mom will smile right back to you. I hope your evening will be filled with love, laughter, & fun while Mom sleeps tonight. Hope you do everything you need to & may want to do. Come visit me in my dreams if you can. I will be waiting. I will be back tomorrow night with another letter to you so until then....good night & sweet dreams. 
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

P.S. Here are the prayers for the day:
  May you take a new grip with your tired hands and mark out a straight path for your feet. God has given you promises to hang onto and enough light for the road in front of you. Someone once said, ‘The devil drives but the Shepherd leads.’ Tell your soul that the devil will not drive you off your promise, off your property, or off your sense of purpose. In fact, the Lord Himself fights for you! So take your stand, hold your ground, and refuse to be bullied by your fears. Jesus won the war so you can win this battle. You are mighty in God, my friend!
  May you be honest with God about the hurts in your heart. May you discern the difference between grief and self-pity. May you be okay with not always being okay. God will one day wipe away every tear from your eyes, but until then, He wants to help you walk this journey with peace in your heart and assurance in your soul. He is with you. He will heal you. And He will one day turn your mourning into dancing and your sorrow into songs of joy. In the meantime, enjoy the little graces you find along the way. Celebrate the small victories. Dare to dream. And take one step at a time. You’re going to be okay. Blessings on your night tonight.