Hi my sweet son! How are you doing today on this Wednesday afternoon? Mom has had a pretty rough day but I was not expecting anything less at all considering what today is. The date is June 19th. Same day as it was 6 years ago...a Wednesday. Mom got the call at 9 am in the morning stating that you were unresponsive and you were headed to the hospital. The nightmare began that day and it hasn't stopped. Mom's mind remembers it all. Every detail, where I was, what I was doing. Mom and Mark were trying to get to you from Oklahoma. Meme, Bob, Grandpa, Debbie, Aunt Beck and Bean were all with you. Mom was so thankful for that. I didn't want you to be alone and they knew that so they stayed by your side. The doctors called me like every 4 hours telling me that everything was grim and not to expect you to live through the night. Mom and Mark were able to get flights at 6 am the next morning on the 2oth but nothing earlier. Mom prayed so hard that I would get there in time. Your Dad was traveling from California as well. Again...Mom remembers every detail like it was yesterday and I know I will never forget it either. I had a good cry this morning and I am sure I will have another one later this evening along with several tomorrow. Just know it is a continued piece of the grieving and healing process. I think I will be this way for the rest of my life. You were my everything. You still are. It was always you and Mom. Oh how I miss that. Mom misses you so much. No words can ever say just how much. You will always be my hero and the wind beneath my wings. Forever you live inside my heart, mind, body and soul. I love you Tyler. To the moon and back and all the way around the world.
Mom hasn't really done much today. Mark was up early to go to PT and then home to start working. I hope he is ready for it because all next week and the week after he will be back at that customer site right where he was prior to all this happening. Mom is worried but Mark feels that he is ready so who am I to say anything. I just hope that he is true to himself if he feels like it is too much. I hope he speaks up and says something instead of just dealing with it. I new his company would be this way. It was too good to be true. I knew they would all show their face sooner or later and they have. Mom just doesn't want to see Mark get hurt and fall right back to where he was just a month ago. I still think it is too soon but I guess we shall see. Mom got up, got ready, did some housework today...dusting, vacuuming, garbage, laundry, etc... the afternoon was spent on the phone talking to a moving company. The guy is suppose to call me back either today or Friday. We should be hearing something about the application for the loan next week and also how all the inspections went too. By this time next week we will either be proud owners of a house or we will be doing more searching for another one. Mom is praying hard. we still have a couple more big things to contend with in regards to this whole thing but that comes after we hear about the house. Mom and Mark have still said hardly anything to anyone. A few know and many suspect but nothing will be made public until Mark has told his employment. Some will be shocked and some will be like.." I knew. " In due time everyone will know.
Last night was quiet. We watched TV and then went to bed. Tonight will be the same way. Mark has a second cutover at 6 am tomorrow morning. Mom will be up then as well because I won't be able to sleep with him talking. That is okay. It will give me enough time to relax and then get ready. I scheduled a nail appointment on Sunday for tomorrow not knowing what the date was. I guess maybe it was a blessing because for a short time I can keep my mind occupied. I just hope that I can keep it all together. I know that you will be with Mom though out the whole day. Thank you my sweet precious son.
I will light your candle in a little bit and I will whisper to you later this evening. Have fun doing all kinds of things that you need to do and want to do while Mom gets some sleep. Come visit me in my dreams if you can. I will be back tomorrow afternoon with another letter to you. Right now, Mom needs to get things set for dinner tonight and feed the pups while Mark is napping. Until tomorrow comes.... good night and sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Here is the daily prayer:
“Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10, NIV
Lord, O great and almighty God, we thank you that you have given us the Savior, in whom we can become united and have peace on earth. May he, the Savior, work powerfully among us. May your Spirit come into people’s hearts so that they learn to acknowledge you as their leader and their God and to rejoice in their lives, which are intended for eternal life. Bless us through your Word and through all the good you do for us. Constantly renew and strengthen us in faith and in patience through the grace you send us. Remember all the peoples who should become yours in the name of Jesus Christ. May they all confess that Jesus Christ is the Lord, to the honor of God the Father. We praise you for the promise you have given us of a wonderful new day of help for all. We praise you that you have created all people to recognize their true calling and their way to salvation. Amen.
No comments:
Post a Comment