Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Sunday afternoon? I hope you are doing well wherever you are & whatever you are doing. Mom has been so busy the last several days since we left NH. We are finally settled in at the new place. We went shopping yesterday & today to get all the things we needed..which was basically everything. Mark is getting nervous as he will be starting some new things tomorrow. Big changes for the both of us but I think they were the right choices at this time. Snickers is adjusting to everything really well too. I know you have been right there with us the entire time. Thank you so much for that. I have so much to say to you but I will in time. I really need to watch what I say on here for a short time. I know you understand what I am saying. Anyways....

 Few things happened today that you will be excited about. Patriots won the football game last night against the Ravens so that was awesome! Dallas Cowboys played today & lost in the last 4 minutes against Green Bay Packers... Yeah I know you are laughing...whatever! I know you are happy about that! 

 I saw your friend Gregg, the one that you graduated with. I met his Fiance too. He was telling me that they will be having a boy in April. They will be naming him Issac Tyler.... they asked if they could after you. I was so honored & I know you are as well. Your friend Willow had her 2nd baby today. Another boy which they named Theo Tyler. Love that name again... he is adorable. So many babies being born lately. Lots of boys which is sweet but never a good sign. Theory is baby boom of boys means a war is coming. Hope not!

 Oh yeah.. I had to laugh as Mark got the Uhaul the other day. I stayed behind at the hotel & later on I started to laugh because I said to myself.. " No way will we get the one with all the snakes on it..." Meme called me about 1 hour later & told me when Mark arrived with it not to look at the truck.. I asked " why " & she told me only Mom's luck..out of all the dang Uhauls that are out there with all kinds of pictures on them... yes indeed we were the ones that got the snakes. I just laughed & every one said you were playing a joke on me. Not only did we get that one but I ended up driving it for 3 hours. I was so impressed with myself. I know you were proud of me too. I could hear you say " My Mommy is growing up ".. LOL! 

 I have a couple daily prayers that I want to write to you so I shall start that right now. January 9~ The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, & self-control. Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is despair, hope; where there is darkness, light; & where there is sadness, joy; O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is giving that we receive, it is in pardoning that we are pardoned, & it is in dying that we are born to eternal life. Amen. 

January 10~ Blessed be the Lord, for he has heard the sound of my pleadings. The Lord is my strength & my shield. God, make me whole again. I have been broken & splintered by the stresses of life & feel as though a huge hole has been opened up inside me. It is like a void that only your grace & love can fill. I have tried to fill it with so many things, & I come to you battered by my foolish attempts to find what only you can give me. Renew my body, my mind, & my spirit, so that I may see things through fresh eyes & face things with new-found energy & willingness. Thanks be to you, God, for making me whole again. Oh boy, I have felt this way since I lost you Tyler. I have been beaten & broken like never before. I have looked to family & friends for strength & turned back to my faith as well. Every day is difficult for me but I am strong & I am getting by. I know you are with me even though I can't see you. I thank you for that. I know you hold me even though I can't feel it. I know you will never leave my side. I miss you so much & I love you beyond this entire world that we live in. Thank you God for helping me through this. Thank you Angels for the help too. Most of all, again, thank you Tyler. I need you. 

 January 11~ Thus says the Lord of hosts; Render true judgments, show kindness & mercy to one another. Where there is suffering, God, let me be an instrument of your loving compassion. Through me, work your miracles to help heal the broken hearts & spirits of those I come in contact with. Let me act as a vessel from which flows caring & hope for those who thirst for it. I want to show others the same compassion you have often shown me & to bring them the good news that they are never alone & never unloved. Thank you, God. True faith is demonstrated when we look for ways to be kind to those in need. 

 The night sky is upon is now. The sky is dark & the weather is cold. I am still not sure if I am really liking it yet or not. I know that being back I am enjoying things I have missed. It is nice to be back to having things I grew up with my entire life but I sure do miss so much more in Texas too. I miss the weather, the sun shining all the time, & I miss some of the people we used to see on a regular basis. Snickers does not like the cold at all. He is not used to it & his little feet hurt. That breaks my heart. I know he will get used to it again but we all sure miss our nightly walks that we took. 

 I hope that I get to see the stars shining & the moon tonight. Either way I will whisper to you as I always do. Hope you will be listening out for Mom & that you can hear me. I hope that you night is all that you want & need it to be. I wish you sweet dreams tonight my sweet precious son. I miss you & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are forever in my heart, mind, & soul. 

 Hope to see you in my dreams. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!