Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Tuesday evening? Mom is so sorry that it has been a few days since I wrote to you but so much sadness has been going on & I was not able to pull myself together enough to write. Maybe I should have because I was so vulnerable but Mom did not believe this is where all the " laundry " should be aired. I know that you have been seeing everything & you can feel all the sadness & heartbreak I am feeling so I know you understand it all & for that I am so thankful. I did try to write to you on Sunday night but for some dang reason it was all whited out & you couldn't see what I wrote. I was so tired after that I just gave up. 
 So to let you know in the past couple of days Mom has been told of a sweet person who passed this morning. You know her too. It was so sad to hear of this news. May she R.I.P. & fly high with the Angels now, I have learned of a very sweet friend of mines brother got into a bad motorcycle accident & it fighting daily for his life & he doesn't even know it. So much of hearing updates have reminded Mom of her bad car accident & things you went though. This person is in such bad shape. My heart hurts for him & his family. Please be there for him. He can use you & so many other Angels at this time. Thank you pumpkin! There is so much sadness right now. Fights, loved ones lost, accidents, sickness & that is just the start of it all. Princess is still acting up too. Mom called up the vets today & spoke to the doctors. We are going to try some medicine to see if that helps & then it may be she needs to go into classes for behavior issues. I feel so bad for her. She is fine during the day & just freaks out at night. I hope the medicine helps her as I just want my little Princess back. Anything that you can continue to do for her will be a blessing. Thank you my sweet precious son. The other lists of sadness could go on & on but I would rather not. Again, I know you see & feel all now so I know you know everything that takes place. Mom could sure use a " Tyler " talk. What I wouldn't give to hear your voice, your advice & just to see your face. Oh how I miss you so much. Words can't even express it at all. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. 
 While Mom is writing to you I am listening to some old songs that I listened to when I was in High School, pregnant for you & when you were 1-3 years old. Brings back many memories but its making me smile as I sing them. I am thinking of you. I hope you are right next to Mom during this time & I hope you are smiling too. I know they will be familiar to you. Anyways.... Mom got to speak to Meme, Grandpa, & Aunt Beck last night & today. It was really nice to chat with everyone & catch up on things. Everyone seems to be doing well. Aunt Beck had a great weekend at her Women's Herbal Conference. Grandpa is working a bunch of hours & Meme is really starting to freak out about us flying for our vacation. I think she is going to have to be medicated as well as the dogs...lol. I keep telling her you will be right there flying with us. That helps but not completely. I hope we can ease her doubts a bit before hand or it is going to be a long plane ride...lol. Mom hasn't done any studying in about 10 days now. It has been difficult with all that has been going on. I am hoping to get back into the swing of things by Friday. Things are just messy & crazy & I don't want to do any studies when I am not 100% there. I will get back on track... I promise you that. Mark is doing well. He has been working a lot as usual but things are starting to slow down again so that is nice. He survived all 6 cut overs that he had to do in 4 weeks. That was rough but he did it. Mom's friend says to say hello to you & that he called upon you to help his brother out as well. I thought that was so sweet. Makes Mom feel good that others ask for your help too. I think that is all the updates for now but I sure to have so many daily prayers to catch up on so I better start them now. 
 August 26~ As for me, I shall behold your face in righteousness; when I awake I shall be satisfied, beholding your likeness. Dear Lord, in my mind's eye I see the faces of people I have loved. I think of the joy it has always brought me, just to see a smile, a tilt of the head & a glimmer in the eye. Thank you, Lord, for these loved ones & I pray now for their well-being. But I also wonder today about what it's like to see your face. I know the psalmist speaks a metaphor, but it's still fun & exciting to think about. What sort of glimmer is there in your eye? Beloved, we are Go'd children now; what we will be has not yet been revealed. What we do now is this: when he is revealed, we will be like him, for we will see him as he is. Amen.
 August 27~ I stretch out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land. I call to you from deeper need. O Lord, hear my request. I know I've sinned in word & deed, but now I'm in distress. Please overlook my errant ways & gaze at me with tender grace & help me fix this mess. In you, dear Lord, I place my trust, I've soured on self-reliance. Your Spirit arms each one of us to slay our taunting giants. Your promises prove strong & true & I'd be nothing without you. I pledge my full compliance. Times of need, calamity & doubt are difficult to go through, it's true. But time & time again they drive us toward the Lord. Amen.
 August 28~ Posterity will serve him; future generations will be told about the Lord, proclaim his deliverance to a people yet unborn saying that he has done it. Heavenly Father, let my life count for you, not only today & tomorrow but also in the years to come. Can I leave a legacy that will inspire people long after I've gone? I'm not looking for personal fame here, but I want to serve you fully. So let me cast my vision forward. How will my devotion to you affect the next generation as well as the next? Use me, dear Lord, to bring the dynamic reality of you to the children in my life, not only teaching them but also empowering them to serve you in the future. It is my humble prayer that " people yet unborn " might be brought closer to you. Keep these words that I am commanding you today in your heart. Recite them to your children & talk about them when you are at home & when you are away, when you lie down & when you rise. Amen.
 August 29~ Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war rise up against me, yet I will be confident. Sometimes it seems that I'm fighting a losing battle. Life gets difficult, Lord & it feels as if everyone & everything is against me. I seem to say the wrong thing. People misunderstand me. My daily work is harder than it should be. Even stoplights turn red as I approach. What's going on? Is the entire universe my enemy? Well, no, you are still on my side & you are much bigger & more powerful than the whole rest of the universe----besides, you made it! When the rest of my life becomes a struggle, I can still rely on your support. Thank you, Lord. And this is the victory that conquers the world, our faith. Amen.
 August 30~ Blessed be the Lord, for he has wondrously shown his steadfast love to me when I was beset as a city under siege. Supreme Creator, I know that feeling, being " under siege. " It's as if everything suddenly goes against me. People who were the best of friends suddenly turn snippy. Activities I once enjoyed become arduous. But, Lord, you have continued to love me & I thank you for your reassurance in those difficult periods. Now I ask you to help me keep an eye out for others who are feeling that way. Give me a sensitive heart to recognize the needs of those around me. Give me the courage to reach out & help. He is the source of every mercy & the God who comforts us. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When others are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. Amen.
 Wow... Mom is finally caught up. That was unreal. That will not happen again that's for sure! It is now pretty late & Mom is going to turn off all electronics & call it a night. I am hoping that your night will be all that you want & need it to be. May you have all kinds of adventures along the way while I try & get sleep. Please come & be with Mom if you can or visit me in my dreams. Thanks Tyler! Mom will look to the sky later in hopes of seeing the stars & the moon. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice. Smile & I will try as well. Please remember that you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & the wind beneath my wings. Fly high & free my sweet son! Until tomorrow night..... good night & sweet dreams.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!

P.S. Mom hasn't done this in awhile but I bought something for myself that I will cherish forever. It is a bracelet that says...Son, I love you to the moon & back. I can wait to get it. I will be thinking of you every time I wear it which will be always. I love you, Tyler.