Dear Tyler,

Hi my pumpkin! How are you doing on this late Saturday afternoon? I wonder where you are & what you are doing. I hope it is sunny & warm at least & you are enjoying what you are doing & the weather. Mom is having a hard day today. I know you know why so I don't need to go through all the details in this letter. I am just really sad & heart broken. I had such high hopes just to get them shattered. Mark is feeling the same way. I just wonder why??? I guess in time we will get all the answers. I am trying to be positive but it just isn't happening right now. It will take a few days to sink in. It just sucks. 
 The weather today really is matching my mood now. It is dark, cold, & rainy. No sun at all today or for the next couple of days. I was so surprised last night when I walked Snickers because I saw the full moon & just a few stars shining through the clouds. I was so happy. It made me smile really big. Thanks Tyler. I know I won't see any for the next couple nights but I know you are with me & you are there. That is all that matters to Mom. I will whisper to you as I always do so I hope you will be able to hear me & are listening for my voice. I miss you so much. What I wouldn't give to hear your voice right now. For you to tell me you love Mom & that everything will be ok in the end. I love you so much. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. 
 Here is the daily prayer for today. December 6~ Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God. Almighty God, how awesome you are to conceive of forgiveness in a world so fraught with sin & evil. Today, I ask you to be with all those who are struggling to forgive someone for an unspeakable grievance. Even when they know that it is only when they forgive that they will be free of the pain, some acts are really hard to forgive. I think of the parents whose children have been kidnapped or murdered, the wife who has been abused, & the innocent victims of a drunk driver. Lord, give all these people your power to forgive so that their pain & anger won't become a sickness in their souls, for they won't be able to do it without you. Give everyone the strength we ( they ) all need to ask for forgiveness during these stressful & trying times. Thank you for the strength I have received those times in my life. Please help Mark & I with what we are going through right now. Thank you. Amen.
 So many sorrows & pain in this world that we live in. So many innocent lives are taken from their families & friends. It is just so sad. I refuse to watch the news on tv for this very reason. I don't like to see what is going on with the hate, crime, abuse, etc... I know it is out there & I know that it is happening. I am not blind to any of it I just don't want to read about it or see it. 
 The evening sky is falling upon us. I need to end this letter & get dinner going for Mom & Mark. I hope that you have peaceful night. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Please watch over our family & friends. Please help Mom with what is going on. I hope there is a solution to this issue. Time is not on our side though. I guess whatever is suppose to happen will. 
 Remember you are forever in my heart, mind, & soul. I love you.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!