Dear Tyler,

Hi pumpkin! How are you doing today on this Tuesday afternoon? Mom is doing well. The weather is still bitter & cold here. The sky is cloudy & overcast but no rain. I just took Snickers out for a short walk & I was surprised at how cool it was. I was chilly. I had to get a jacket on.. guess my blood has thinned out in the last 2 1/2 years being away from New England...lol! Not sure how that will go in the next couple weeks as we will be headed up there. Guess I will have to dress in many layers so I won't get sick.
 Lots of stuff to do here for Mom in the next few days. Making sure that everything is packed for the wedding... all the decor, the gown, all the things Mom will need that day & plus all the extra things that both Mark & Mom will need for the rest of our trip & not to mention all the other stuff we need to bring for Snicks. We also need all the paperwork & we need to make sure that the truck is in good shape to make the trip to & from. Like I said there is lots to do but not stressing about any of it because I know we got this. I know that you & many others are looking out for us so we are in good hands. I know you won't let anything happen to any of us. I am so thankful for that! I love you so much!
 Before I get more into my letter I want to do the daily prayer. December 2~ Now to him who is able to keep you from falling, & to make you stand without blemish in the presence of his glory with rejoicing, to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, power, & authority before all the times & now & forever. Amen. Today, I sing out in praise for the Lord has made me whole. My life is filled with peace & balance, & harmony is the order of my day. My life was not always like this. I once took on way more than I should have, & it wore me down. But in God's love I now stand restored & at peace with whatever each new day brings. I know in my heart that I can handle anything as long as I am connected to the source that is my God. It is a source from which I can find all the highest & best blessings life has to offer. It is a source of pure & eternal peace. To have true inner peace, we must release everything to God. I am trying to get to the point where my life is filled with peace & balance. I struggle with this daily but I think I am getting closer to it. I sometimes take on so much more than I should & think I can do it all to find out later I couldn't & I stress myself out. This is not good for me as the older I get. I need to remember to do what I can, & that I can't always make things happen. I can't control everything. I think in the last 17 months I have been doing a way better job at this whole thing. I don't get into drama of others, if things don't pertain to me then I leave it alone. I don't stress as much or as easily. I am a better person because of it. I strive every day to be better. Thank you Lord for the strength to keep going in this direction. It continues to make me stronger & healthier. This is what I continue to need in my ife & I know I will get it with you guiding me. Amen.
 Tyler, I can't believe that this month will make 18 months without you. It will be the 2nd Christmas & New Years without you too. My heart hurts so much still but I am trying to get strong to make you proud. I don't know if I will ever get there but I know I will never stop trying. I bought a little ornament with your name on it & I plan on bringing to you when I am there in a couple weeks. I hope that no one steals it. With everything going on I forgot to tell you that Mark & Mom will be able to get you your stone & bench. It will take 6 weeks to order & it can be put in at the beginning of March. I am so excited to be able to finally do this for you. It means so much to Mom. You deserve it all. I hope you will like the design that I am choosing for it. I think you will as it is your favorite character... Jack & Zero! I will keep you posted on everything as it gets closer. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. I think of you all the time. I love you beyond any words I can express. 
 It is late afternoon now & the night sky will be approaching very soon. I will walk Snicks again later & I hope to see the moon & the stars but I have my doubts tonight because of the weather right now. Either way I will whisper & talk to you as I always do. I hope you can hear me & will be listening out. I hope that your night is all that you want & need it to be. I will see you in my dreams tonight! Remember you will forever be in my heart, mind, & soul.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!