Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Saturday evening? Mom has been feeling a little tough today. Had plans to go out & do some errands & shopping during the day but that got botched as I was feeling sick. So instead of pushing myself to go do those things Mom decided to just stay put & relax & let my body rest. I have been laying on the couch catching up on my tv shows that I have taped. I know that sounds so lazy & it really is but I believe it is necessary for Mom at this time. 
 Well, tomorrow is Valentines Day. This year makes 3 years without you. Mom always asked you to be my Valentine & every year you would say yes. It warmed Mom's heart when you said that. It was so special to me even when you were a young man. You made Mom smile then & every day before & every day after. I miss our times together, Tyler. I miss you so much. I hope that you miss Mom just as much too. 
 Mark surprised Mom today with tickets to go see Disney on Ice. I had said months ago how I would like to go see it again & it had been years since I had gone to one. He remembered & bought tickets for us. The show is tomorrow morning. The last time I went was in Boston back in 1990. Mom never knew this but at the time I was pregnant for you. o in a way you went as well. Your Dad, Meme, Nana & I went. It was a fun day & I wished through out the years Mom was able to take you to one that you could see. I would like to think you will be with Mom tomorrow when I go again....this time in a very different way than before. Mom will be sure to take lots of pictures & I will post a few on here for you. At least some of your favorite characters....like Goofy, Lion King, Aladdin & a few others!
 The day has been quite quiet. It has been really cold here & tomorrow I have heard will be even worse. They are saying with the wind chill factor it can get to -28 degrees. That is insane. What is even more insane is that Tuesday it is suppose to rain but be 51 degrees. This winter is definitely crazy. No one has called today so Mom has no updates for you. Maybe in the next couple of days I will have some for you. Aunt Beck is getting ready to go into the jungle. Mom sent an email for her. Hope she got a chance to read it. I am sure she is having a great time & you are with her. Thanks pumpkin!
 Well, here is the daily prayer for you today. February 13~ And be not conformed to this world; but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good & acceptable & perfect will of God. What a day. When all else fails, rearranging the furniture. Lend a shoulder, God of change, as I scoot the couch to a new spot. Like a wanderer looking for your promised land, I need a fresh perspective. My life has turned topsy-turvy & I need a new place to sit, first with you, then with the rest of my world. I need to be prepared for whatever happens next & nothing says it like a redone room. I smile as I take my new seat; this is a better view. Amen.
 Tonight, Mom is going to have some fun & play cribbage with my friend on line. He lives about 900 miles away & loves the game as much as Mom does. I think it will be fun. I hope I do well. Haven't played in several years now. My go to game now is Chess. I really like playing it. I do have one regret though & that is that I never got the chance to understand the game & play with you. This will forever make Mom sad. I hope that when I do play I make you proud. Be with Mom tonight while I play with my friend. I want to kick his butt in the game....lol! Thanks Ty!
 The evening sky is almost upon us. The sun is just setting now. The sky appears clear. Mom is hoping to get the chance to see the stars & moon tonight shining in the sky. It has been a few nights so it would be nice. Nevertheless if that does not happen than now that Mom will whisper to you no matter what. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear it & blow Mom a kiss, ok? I love you so much Tyler. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are Mom's forever. You are & always will be my world. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul my sweet precious son. 
 Hope your night is all that you need & want it to be. May you have the sweetest of dreams & also have the chance to come visit with me in my dreams tonight. You are my Hero & my Wind Beneath My Wings. 
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!