Thursday, March 31, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom is doing the best I can today. I just got done doing 2 sections of my exam. Yesterday I did 1 section for 9 hours straight & I flopped on that one. I thought it was going to be pretty easy but there were several questions that were very tricky. I did some research on the internet as well & still got the questions wrong. Mom was pretty upset last night. By the time I got done I was so tired. I watch 1 tv show & then went to bed. I am so sorry for not writing to you last night but Mom was just in no mood as you could see. I know I was upsetting you by the way I was acting last night & I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Today, I went into the exam with a different attitude & I did much better. The 1st section I did I got 3 wrong & the 2nd section I did I got them all right. I have answered 517 questions & I have 487 correct with a grade of 94 right now. Mom is pretty happy at the moment. I know that you are with me every step of the way & that is great because I need you, Tyler. Thank you for being there for Mom.
The weather today was so freaking crazy. The sun was shining for a change & the sky was blue but the wind was blowing. We have been in a wind advisory warning all day long. The gusts of wind were up to 50mph. It was so nuts. It has calmed down quite a bit now. Hopefully the sky will be clear so that Mom will see the stars & moon out. No matter what I will be whispering to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you.
Mom hasn't really got any updates for you as I am always stuck in my computer doing my exam. I am hardly doing anything else except the every day life stuff but being on the phone is not one of them. I am sure that everyone is still doing well because: a. You are watching over us all & b. I am sure I would get a phone call if things were not. Hopefully by the weekend I can update you on how things are. Oh I did get something over facebook that made me tear up.....it was in my memories & it said that 8 years ago I became friends with you. I was not expecting that & it made me cry. I couldn't help it pumpkin.
I have a couple daily prayers for you so here they are. March 30~ Finally brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are good to report; if there be any virtue & if there be any praise, think on these things. Lord, so often we find ourselves asking you to save us from bad situations only to discover you quietly revealing to us that we are our own worst enemies! Teach us to break destructive habits & to stop polluting our minds with negative thoughts, Lord. Save us from our enemies, even when it means you have to step in & save us from ourselves! Amen.
March 31~ For thou hast made him most blessed for ever: thou hast made him exceeding glad with thy countenance. Lord, I open my eyes & all I see are the amazing blessings that surround me. In this moment, I want for nothing & I live with the knowledge that I can always turn to you for help & cast my cares upon you, when my clarity & my vision cloud with worry. Thank you, Lord, for reminding me that the joyful blessings of this moment are all because of your love for me. Amen.
Mom is all caught up now. I hope that you night is everything that you want & need it to be. May you do all that you need to as well. Hope you have sweet dreams & come visit me in my own dreams tonight. Remember that you are always in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world my sweet precious son. Good night.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom is doing the best I can today. I just got done doing 2 sections of my exam. Yesterday I did 1 section for 9 hours straight & I flopped on that one. I thought it was going to be pretty easy but there were several questions that were very tricky. I did some research on the internet as well & still got the questions wrong. Mom was pretty upset last night. By the time I got done I was so tired. I watch 1 tv show & then went to bed. I am so sorry for not writing to you last night but Mom was just in no mood as you could see. I know I was upsetting you by the way I was acting last night & I am so sorry. Please forgive me. Today, I went into the exam with a different attitude & I did much better. The 1st section I did I got 3 wrong & the 2nd section I did I got them all right. I have answered 517 questions & I have 487 correct with a grade of 94 right now. Mom is pretty happy at the moment. I know that you are with me every step of the way & that is great because I need you, Tyler. Thank you for being there for Mom.
The weather today was so freaking crazy. The sun was shining for a change & the sky was blue but the wind was blowing. We have been in a wind advisory warning all day long. The gusts of wind were up to 50mph. It was so nuts. It has calmed down quite a bit now. Hopefully the sky will be clear so that Mom will see the stars & moon out. No matter what I will be whispering to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you.
Mom hasn't really got any updates for you as I am always stuck in my computer doing my exam. I am hardly doing anything else except the every day life stuff but being on the phone is not one of them. I am sure that everyone is still doing well because: a. You are watching over us all & b. I am sure I would get a phone call if things were not. Hopefully by the weekend I can update you on how things are. Oh I did get something over facebook that made me tear up.....it was in my memories & it said that 8 years ago I became friends with you. I was not expecting that & it made me cry. I couldn't help it pumpkin.
I have a couple daily prayers for you so here they are. March 30~ Finally brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are good to report; if there be any virtue & if there be any praise, think on these things. Lord, so often we find ourselves asking you to save us from bad situations only to discover you quietly revealing to us that we are our own worst enemies! Teach us to break destructive habits & to stop polluting our minds with negative thoughts, Lord. Save us from our enemies, even when it means you have to step in & save us from ourselves! Amen.
March 31~ For thou hast made him most blessed for ever: thou hast made him exceeding glad with thy countenance. Lord, I open my eyes & all I see are the amazing blessings that surround me. In this moment, I want for nothing & I live with the knowledge that I can always turn to you for help & cast my cares upon you, when my clarity & my vision cloud with worry. Thank you, Lord, for reminding me that the joyful blessings of this moment are all because of your love for me. Amen.
Mom is all caught up now. I hope that you night is everything that you want & need it to be. May you do all that you need to as well. Hope you have sweet dreams & come visit me in my own dreams tonight. Remember that you are always in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world my sweet precious son. Good night.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Tuesday, March 29, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Tuesday afternoon? The weather today is sunny for the first time in like 3 1/2 weeks. Mom was really surprised at that. It is such a nice change. I was starting to forget what it looked like...lol. Mom is so sorry that my letters to you have been so short or none at all. I am finding that while I am doing this certification exam I have very little time to do much else. In the morning I am doing housework & laundry, walking the dogs & then getting ready for the day. I start my exam & before I know it is is after 4:30 pm & I need to start dinner. By the time dinner is done & dishes are cleaned, Mom is so tired & my eyes are sore from looking at the computers all day that all I do is look at the tv & then go to bed. I am drained. This exam is so much harder than what I has expected it to be. I think I am doing ok though. I have answered over 300 questions & I have only 13 wrong. My average right now is 96%. I know that you are with me every step of the way being my personal cheerleader.....just the way Mom always was with you. Thank you my sweet precious son. It means the world to Mom & I hope that I am making you proud. Mom will try to write to you in the morning so that way by the end of the day when I am tired I can just turn off my computer knowing that your letter is already done. I think that ill be for the best. Please know that even if I do not write to you, it does not mean that you are not in my thoughts. That is not true at all. You are in my thoughts, heart, mind & soul every minute of the day. I look at your picture on my computer desk all day long & silently say hi to you & give you a smile. I hope you hear Mom & you see that. I hope it makes you smile too. I miss you so much my sweet son. There are no words to describe the loss I have when you left this world. I try to understand it all with not wanting the feelings of guilt, anger & hate but some days just get the best of me. I am trying though. I will always be trying for the rest of my life. It is just not easy at all. Please continue to be patience with Mom. Thank you.
For the last few days Mom has not spoken to anyone but I know that our family is doing just fine. We are all just busy with our schedules to be able to connect right now. I know you are watching over us all & making sure we are all happy, healthy & safe. meme did tell me over facebook that she wishes you would send her a sign to let her know you are around her. Maybe a butterfly or a cardinal or something that she will definitely know it is you...her peanut. Mom would love a sign too. Aunt Beck said she hasn't seen you in a while either. She says that you are a very busy guy & I don't doubt it. When you get a chance just give us all signs, please? I will make sure to be looking out for them. Mom has a couple daily prayers to catch up on so here they are.
March 28~ That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life. Lord, I do believe! And because of my hope for life with you in eternity, there is all the more meaning for life today. There's meaning in my choices, my relationships, my work, my plan, my worship. It all matters, it all counts, & I live knowing one day I'll stand in your presence with great joy. Amen.
March 29~Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. We become discouraged when we try to live according to our own time clocks. We want what we want & we want it this very minute. Then, when we don't get it, we sink in the quicksand of hopelessness & defeat. Only when we realize that God is at work in our lives we will begin to relax & let things happen in due season. Fruit will not ripen any faster because we demand it. It will ripen in all its sweet splendor when it is ready in spite of our demands. Amen.
The sun will be setting in a couple hours. Love that it stays lighter out longer now. I hope that since the sky has been clear all day that Mom will get the chance to see the stars & moon shining bright. Doesn't matter though as I will be whispering to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Don't forget to smile! I won't! Mom hopes that your night is filled with all the things you need & want to do & what is being asked of you too. Relax if you can though & slow down. If I know you, you are Mr. Speedy as you were down for so long. Mom gets that & I understand that completely. Sweet dreams to you too. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight. Remember that you are Mom's true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Good night, Ty.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Tuesday afternoon? The weather today is sunny for the first time in like 3 1/2 weeks. Mom was really surprised at that. It is such a nice change. I was starting to forget what it looked like...lol. Mom is so sorry that my letters to you have been so short or none at all. I am finding that while I am doing this certification exam I have very little time to do much else. In the morning I am doing housework & laundry, walking the dogs & then getting ready for the day. I start my exam & before I know it is is after 4:30 pm & I need to start dinner. By the time dinner is done & dishes are cleaned, Mom is so tired & my eyes are sore from looking at the computers all day that all I do is look at the tv & then go to bed. I am drained. This exam is so much harder than what I has expected it to be. I think I am doing ok though. I have answered over 300 questions & I have only 13 wrong. My average right now is 96%. I know that you are with me every step of the way being my personal cheerleader.....just the way Mom always was with you. Thank you my sweet precious son. It means the world to Mom & I hope that I am making you proud. Mom will try to write to you in the morning so that way by the end of the day when I am tired I can just turn off my computer knowing that your letter is already done. I think that ill be for the best. Please know that even if I do not write to you, it does not mean that you are not in my thoughts. That is not true at all. You are in my thoughts, heart, mind & soul every minute of the day. I look at your picture on my computer desk all day long & silently say hi to you & give you a smile. I hope you hear Mom & you see that. I hope it makes you smile too. I miss you so much my sweet son. There are no words to describe the loss I have when you left this world. I try to understand it all with not wanting the feelings of guilt, anger & hate but some days just get the best of me. I am trying though. I will always be trying for the rest of my life. It is just not easy at all. Please continue to be patience with Mom. Thank you.
For the last few days Mom has not spoken to anyone but I know that our family is doing just fine. We are all just busy with our schedules to be able to connect right now. I know you are watching over us all & making sure we are all happy, healthy & safe. meme did tell me over facebook that she wishes you would send her a sign to let her know you are around her. Maybe a butterfly or a cardinal or something that she will definitely know it is you...her peanut. Mom would love a sign too. Aunt Beck said she hasn't seen you in a while either. She says that you are a very busy guy & I don't doubt it. When you get a chance just give us all signs, please? I will make sure to be looking out for them. Mom has a couple daily prayers to catch up on so here they are.
March 28~ That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life. Lord, I do believe! And because of my hope for life with you in eternity, there is all the more meaning for life today. There's meaning in my choices, my relationships, my work, my plan, my worship. It all matters, it all counts, & I live knowing one day I'll stand in your presence with great joy. Amen.
March 29~Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. We become discouraged when we try to live according to our own time clocks. We want what we want & we want it this very minute. Then, when we don't get it, we sink in the quicksand of hopelessness & defeat. Only when we realize that God is at work in our lives we will begin to relax & let things happen in due season. Fruit will not ripen any faster because we demand it. It will ripen in all its sweet splendor when it is ready in spite of our demands. Amen.
The sun will be setting in a couple hours. Love that it stays lighter out longer now. I hope that since the sky has been clear all day that Mom will get the chance to see the stars & moon shining bright. Doesn't matter though as I will be whispering to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Don't forget to smile! I won't! Mom hopes that your night is filled with all the things you need & want to do & what is being asked of you too. Relax if you can though & slow down. If I know you, you are Mr. Speedy as you were down for so long. Mom gets that & I understand that completely. Sweet dreams to you too. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight. Remember that you are Mom's true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Good night, Ty.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Sunday, March 27, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. Happy Easter to you in Heaven. I hope that where you were it was full of sunshine. Here where Mom is it was pretty chilly but the sun did come out for a little bit today which was so nice to see but tomorrow will be right back to cloudy, gray & rainy. Go figure right? Guess we need a lot of rain to wash out all the negative things in this world. Today was a really good day for Mom but super busy. Meme, Bob, Grandpa & Debbie... Skittles too, came down to visit. Mom made a nice dinner for us all & we had a lot of great conversation & laughs. They all stayed for about 6 hours. Mom was really sad when they left. I miss them all so much. I hope that they have a safe ride home with no traffic but I know they will as you are guiding them. Thank you pumpkin. Mom is pretty wiped out with doing all the cooking & cleaning up but it is a good tired. The pups are wiped out as well from playing with Skittles. They were really cute together. Did you see them? If so I know you were smiling. In about 30 minutes we have a scheduled Skype call with Mark's Dad & Step Mom. They were traveling from West Virginia back home to Ohio. It will be nice to talk to them as it has been awhile since I have. They are really sweet people. You would have liked them & they would have liked you. I know that in your own way you already know them.
Mom really have no updates for you again as I did not talk on the phone today much at all because everyone was here. I did talk to a friend on the phone & him & his family seem to be doing well. He is the one that always tells Mom to tell you hello. Other than that I spoke to Auntie Kristina as well. Things are well with her too.
Everyone just called to let Mom know that they arrived safe & well & that they had a wonderful time today. That made Mom's day. We spoke about you a lot. Did you hear us talking? I hope so. It makes me smile when family & friends say your name & speak of you. It warms my heart. I love talking about you. At times it does make me sad but for the most part it makes me happy. I sure do miss you my sweet precious son. Holidays are not easy at all for me but I do try my best. We loved the holidays & always had fun. Mom will have to have some peeps for the both of us. Remember that time we had so many of them that we got a sugar rush just to crash an hour later? Those were great times! Memories now that I will cherish forever.
Here is the daily prayer for today. March 27~ Greater love hath no man than this; that a man lay down his life for his friends. When I think about your example of love, dear God, I realize that love is far more than a warm emotion. It is a deep commitment to look out for another's best interest, even at one's own expense. Please teach me to put my pride & my heart on the line. Please protect me, Lord, as I love others in your name. Amen.
The night sky is here & I will be looking at it in a couple hours. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice & smile that smile I love & miss so very much. Hope that your evening is all that you want & need it to be. May you do all that is needed of you as well. Sweet dreams tonight & come see Mom in my dreams as well. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You will always be my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Never forget this. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. Happy Easter to you in Heaven. I hope that where you were it was full of sunshine. Here where Mom is it was pretty chilly but the sun did come out for a little bit today which was so nice to see but tomorrow will be right back to cloudy, gray & rainy. Go figure right? Guess we need a lot of rain to wash out all the negative things in this world. Today was a really good day for Mom but super busy. Meme, Bob, Grandpa & Debbie... Skittles too, came down to visit. Mom made a nice dinner for us all & we had a lot of great conversation & laughs. They all stayed for about 6 hours. Mom was really sad when they left. I miss them all so much. I hope that they have a safe ride home with no traffic but I know they will as you are guiding them. Thank you pumpkin. Mom is pretty wiped out with doing all the cooking & cleaning up but it is a good tired. The pups are wiped out as well from playing with Skittles. They were really cute together. Did you see them? If so I know you were smiling. In about 30 minutes we have a scheduled Skype call with Mark's Dad & Step Mom. They were traveling from West Virginia back home to Ohio. It will be nice to talk to them as it has been awhile since I have. They are really sweet people. You would have liked them & they would have liked you. I know that in your own way you already know them.
Mom really have no updates for you again as I did not talk on the phone today much at all because everyone was here. I did talk to a friend on the phone & him & his family seem to be doing well. He is the one that always tells Mom to tell you hello. Other than that I spoke to Auntie Kristina as well. Things are well with her too.
Everyone just called to let Mom know that they arrived safe & well & that they had a wonderful time today. That made Mom's day. We spoke about you a lot. Did you hear us talking? I hope so. It makes me smile when family & friends say your name & speak of you. It warms my heart. I love talking about you. At times it does make me sad but for the most part it makes me happy. I sure do miss you my sweet precious son. Holidays are not easy at all for me but I do try my best. We loved the holidays & always had fun. Mom will have to have some peeps for the both of us. Remember that time we had so many of them that we got a sugar rush just to crash an hour later? Those were great times! Memories now that I will cherish forever.
Here is the daily prayer for today. March 27~ Greater love hath no man than this; that a man lay down his life for his friends. When I think about your example of love, dear God, I realize that love is far more than a warm emotion. It is a deep commitment to look out for another's best interest, even at one's own expense. Please teach me to put my pride & my heart on the line. Please protect me, Lord, as I love others in your name. Amen.
The night sky is here & I will be looking at it in a couple hours. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice & smile that smile I love & miss so very much. Hope that your evening is all that you want & need it to be. May you do all that is needed of you as well. Sweet dreams tonight & come see Mom in my dreams as well. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You will always be my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Never forget this. Good night, Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, March 26, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Saturday night? Mom has had a pretty rough couple of days but I am hanging in there. I have a massive headache right now & am going to go to bed but I first wanted to write you a quick letter to tell you that I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Tomorrow is Easter & Meme, Bob, Grandpa & Debbie are coming down to see Mom & Mark. I am pretty excited to see them as it has been 4 months. They are leaving early in the morning & will be here around 10 am. Mom sure hopes to get plenty of sleep so that I can get up early in the morning to do all the cooking. Please be with Mom tonight. I need you so much right now, Ty. Lots of things are going on & I wish I could hear your voice. I need a Tyler pep talk so bad. I need your words of wisdom that is for sure.
The weather today was better than it has been. It was pretty chilly & the sun finally came out late this afternoon for a couple hours. Hope that tomorrow is nice so that I can show everyone around. This will be Meme & Bob's first time here & I know they are excited. Mom is excited for them. Please watch over them as they are traveling to & from. Thanks pumpkin.
Mom really doesn't have much for updates as it has been pretty quiet the last couple of days with me being alone. Uncle Dick is home now & resting. Auntie Kristina's Dad is home resting as well. Thank God for that. It was touch & go for awhile. Aunt Beck is crazy busy as always. I will be calling everyone tomorrow to wish them a good day. Wish Heaven had visiting hours & a phone as I would love to see you & talk to you......Hope you get to celebrate with Nana & Pepe & so many others. Give everyone my love. I miss them all so much too.
Here is the daily prayers I need to catch up on. March 25~ The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with loving kindness have I drawn thee. Lord, you have seen the times when I've been abandoned by those in whose love I have trusted. You have known the loneliness in my soul. I must confess to you that it causes me to wonder if your love has failed me, too. I need you to assure me that you are still here & that you will always stay with me. Amen.
March 26~ And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace. Kindness sows a seed within me that begins to sprout where before all was barren. Leaves of trust start to bud & I branch out. I take in gentle caring & loving nudging & realize I might just go ahead & bloom! After all, God arranged spring after winter. Amen.
Mom is all caught up yet again. The night sky has been upon us for several hours now. In a few minutes I will look to the outside & whisper to you as I always do. I hope to see the stars & the moon tonight shining bright. If not maybe tomorrow. be listening for Mom's voice. Smile & I will smile so you can see as well. Hope you night is all that you need & want. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Saturday night? Mom has had a pretty rough couple of days but I am hanging in there. I have a massive headache right now & am going to go to bed but I first wanted to write you a quick letter to tell you that I miss you so much & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Tomorrow is Easter & Meme, Bob, Grandpa & Debbie are coming down to see Mom & Mark. I am pretty excited to see them as it has been 4 months. They are leaving early in the morning & will be here around 10 am. Mom sure hopes to get plenty of sleep so that I can get up early in the morning to do all the cooking. Please be with Mom tonight. I need you so much right now, Ty. Lots of things are going on & I wish I could hear your voice. I need a Tyler pep talk so bad. I need your words of wisdom that is for sure.
The weather today was better than it has been. It was pretty chilly & the sun finally came out late this afternoon for a couple hours. Hope that tomorrow is nice so that I can show everyone around. This will be Meme & Bob's first time here & I know they are excited. Mom is excited for them. Please watch over them as they are traveling to & from. Thanks pumpkin.
Mom really doesn't have much for updates as it has been pretty quiet the last couple of days with me being alone. Uncle Dick is home now & resting. Auntie Kristina's Dad is home resting as well. Thank God for that. It was touch & go for awhile. Aunt Beck is crazy busy as always. I will be calling everyone tomorrow to wish them a good day. Wish Heaven had visiting hours & a phone as I would love to see you & talk to you......Hope you get to celebrate with Nana & Pepe & so many others. Give everyone my love. I miss them all so much too.
Here is the daily prayers I need to catch up on. March 25~ The Lord hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with loving kindness have I drawn thee. Lord, you have seen the times when I've been abandoned by those in whose love I have trusted. You have known the loneliness in my soul. I must confess to you that it causes me to wonder if your love has failed me, too. I need you to assure me that you are still here & that you will always stay with me. Amen.
March 26~ And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace. Kindness sows a seed within me that begins to sprout where before all was barren. Leaves of trust start to bud & I branch out. I take in gentle caring & loving nudging & realize I might just go ahead & bloom! After all, God arranged spring after winter. Amen.
Mom is all caught up yet again. The night sky has been upon us for several hours now. In a few minutes I will look to the outside & whisper to you as I always do. I hope to see the stars & the moon tonight shining bright. If not maybe tomorrow. be listening for Mom's voice. Smile & I will smile so you can see as well. Hope you night is all that you need & want. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, March 24, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom is so sorry that I have not been able to write to you the last couple of days. Mom has just been so tired after doing her exam all day. My eyes have been so heavy & sore from starring at the computer all day that when it comes time to focus on doing your letter I can't even see the screen. Mom has been so tired lately that when I go to bed I am out like a light & I don't remember dreaming at all...you know that is not Mom because I remember all my dreams in detail every night. Anyways.... the weather today has been the same as it has been for the last 3 weeks. Cloudy, rainy & cold. I hope the sun will come out soon. I sure do miss it. These dreary days make it tougher on me & they drag me down where the bright sunny days give me pep in my step & I can do so much more. I hope where you are it is sunny & warm. Mom is so jealous of all the folks in the South. I am so tired of the cold & winter... I just want it to be over with. Guess I have a few more weeks of it even though it is Spring.
Lets see, the updates that i have for you are actually not that many for not writing to you for a couple days. It ha been pretty quiet on my end. Spoke to Aunt Beck, Meme, & Grandpa & everyone is doing well. Meme, Bob, Grandpa & Debbie will be here on Sunday for Easter. I can't wait to see them. I miss them so much. Auntie Kristina's Dad is doing ok. He had his surgery today & the doctors were able to put 2 more stents in his heart. If all goes well he will be able to leave the hospital on Friday. Thank you for being with him, her Mom & Auntie Kristina. She knows you were with her. She could feel your presence. Uncle Dick is back in the hospital again. Auntie Jacqui sent me a message yesterday telling me. Not sure what is going on with him again but hope there is an update tomorrow. Aunt Shirley is still in a lot of pain & Grammy is sleeping a lot lately. I know it comes with her age but it is really tough to hear about it. It makes Mom sad. My friend is doing well with his new job. He is finding it boring this week because it is the training but he will be " hands on " next week & that will be great. I am just so happy that he is working again. I am sure it makes him feel better as well. Mark is working so much this week. I have hardly ever talk to him let alone see him. Pups are good. They drive me crazy still but I love them....lol Mom is doing alright. Some days are good & other days I struggle a lot. I know you are with me. Thank you so much. It means the world to Mom. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Never forget that, please.
Well Mom has 4 daily prayers to catch up on so here they are. March 21~ Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing; thou hast put off my sackcloth & girded me with gladness. Security, loving God, is going to sleep in the assurance that you know our hearts before we speak & are waiting, as soon as you hear from us, to transform our concerns into hope & action, our loneliness into companionship & our despair into dance. Amen.
March 22~ For when God made promise to Abraham, because he could swear by no greater, he sware by himself, Saying, Surely blessing I will bless thee & multiplying I will multiply thee. Faith in a wise & trustworthy God, even in broken times like these, teaches us a new math: subtracting old ways & adding new thoughts because sharing with God divides our troubles & multiplies unfathomable possibilities for renewed life. Amen.
March 23~ I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments. Dear Lord, when I am sad, you give me hop. When I am lost, you offer me direction & guidance. When I am alone, you stand beside me. When my heart aches with sorrow, you bring me new blessings. Thank you for your gifts of grace, love, & healing. Amen.
March 24~ But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord God, that I may declare all thy works. Because God is good, he loves to bless us. Yet his deepest longing is for a relationship with us. As you enjoy the good things the heavenly Father has given to you, take time to commune with him, to grow closer to him, & to get to now him a little better. Amen.
Wow, Mom is all caught up now. Makes me feel good. It was really bothering me that I couldn't write to you. I know you didn't mind but Mom did. The night sky has been upon us for some time now. I know I won't see anything shining in the sky but it doesn't matter as I will whisper to you as I always do every night. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you. Mom is hoping that your night is filled with everything you need & want to do. I know you are very busy learning all kinds of things so you will be set when you decide to have your next life. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you more than words could say.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Mom is so sorry that I have not been able to write to you the last couple of days. Mom has just been so tired after doing her exam all day. My eyes have been so heavy & sore from starring at the computer all day that when it comes time to focus on doing your letter I can't even see the screen. Mom has been so tired lately that when I go to bed I am out like a light & I don't remember dreaming at all...you know that is not Mom because I remember all my dreams in detail every night. Anyways.... the weather today has been the same as it has been for the last 3 weeks. Cloudy, rainy & cold. I hope the sun will come out soon. I sure do miss it. These dreary days make it tougher on me & they drag me down where the bright sunny days give me pep in my step & I can do so much more. I hope where you are it is sunny & warm. Mom is so jealous of all the folks in the South. I am so tired of the cold & winter... I just want it to be over with. Guess I have a few more weeks of it even though it is Spring.
Lets see, the updates that i have for you are actually not that many for not writing to you for a couple days. It ha been pretty quiet on my end. Spoke to Aunt Beck, Meme, & Grandpa & everyone is doing well. Meme, Bob, Grandpa & Debbie will be here on Sunday for Easter. I can't wait to see them. I miss them so much. Auntie Kristina's Dad is doing ok. He had his surgery today & the doctors were able to put 2 more stents in his heart. If all goes well he will be able to leave the hospital on Friday. Thank you for being with him, her Mom & Auntie Kristina. She knows you were with her. She could feel your presence. Uncle Dick is back in the hospital again. Auntie Jacqui sent me a message yesterday telling me. Not sure what is going on with him again but hope there is an update tomorrow. Aunt Shirley is still in a lot of pain & Grammy is sleeping a lot lately. I know it comes with her age but it is really tough to hear about it. It makes Mom sad. My friend is doing well with his new job. He is finding it boring this week because it is the training but he will be " hands on " next week & that will be great. I am just so happy that he is working again. I am sure it makes him feel better as well. Mark is working so much this week. I have hardly ever talk to him let alone see him. Pups are good. They drive me crazy still but I love them....lol Mom is doing alright. Some days are good & other days I struggle a lot. I know you are with me. Thank you so much. It means the world to Mom. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Never forget that, please.
Well Mom has 4 daily prayers to catch up on so here they are. March 21~ Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing; thou hast put off my sackcloth & girded me with gladness. Security, loving God, is going to sleep in the assurance that you know our hearts before we speak & are waiting, as soon as you hear from us, to transform our concerns into hope & action, our loneliness into companionship & our despair into dance. Amen.
March 22~ For when God made promise to Abraham, because he could swear by no greater, he sware by himself, Saying, Surely blessing I will bless thee & multiplying I will multiply thee. Faith in a wise & trustworthy God, even in broken times like these, teaches us a new math: subtracting old ways & adding new thoughts because sharing with God divides our troubles & multiplies unfathomable possibilities for renewed life. Amen.
March 23~ I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek thy servant; for I do not forget thy commandments. Dear Lord, when I am sad, you give me hop. When I am lost, you offer me direction & guidance. When I am alone, you stand beside me. When my heart aches with sorrow, you bring me new blessings. Thank you for your gifts of grace, love, & healing. Amen.
March 24~ But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord God, that I may declare all thy works. Because God is good, he loves to bless us. Yet his deepest longing is for a relationship with us. As you enjoy the good things the heavenly Father has given to you, take time to commune with him, to grow closer to him, & to get to now him a little better. Amen.
Wow, Mom is all caught up now. Makes me feel good. It was really bothering me that I couldn't write to you. I know you didn't mind but Mom did. The night sky has been upon us for some time now. I know I won't see anything shining in the sky but it doesn't matter as I will whisper to you as I always do every night. Be listening out for my voice. Smile when you hear it & I will smile when I talk to you. Mom is hoping that your night is filled with everything you need & want to do. I know you are very busy learning all kinds of things so you will be set when you decide to have your next life. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight. You are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you more than words could say.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Wednesday, March 23, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! Mom is so tired tonight but I wanted to stop by & let you know that I will write to you tomorrow. A very long letter with all updates & the 3 daily prayers. I am so sorry but my eyes are so sore & sleepy. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice. I will smile & hope you will too. Hope you have a great night doing all that you need & want to do. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit me in my dreams as well. Remember you are forever in my heart, mins & soul. You are my true hero & the wind beneath my wings. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! Mom is so tired tonight but I wanted to stop by & let you know that I will write to you tomorrow. A very long letter with all updates & the 3 daily prayers. I am so sorry but my eyes are so sore & sleepy. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for my voice. I will smile & hope you will too. Hope you have a great night doing all that you need & want to do. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit me in my dreams as well. Remember you are forever in my heart, mins & soul. You are my true hero & the wind beneath my wings. I miss you like crazy & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Tuesday, March 22, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. I wrote you a letter tonight & something happened & it did not come through for some reason. Mom is tired & I am going to go to bed in a few minutes. I will write a long letter tomorrow to you. Sweet dreams tonight & come visit Mom in my own dreams tonight. I miss you & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are my hero, my wind beneath my wings & you are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. I wrote you a letter tonight & something happened & it did not come through for some reason. Mom is tired & I am going to go to bed in a few minutes. I will write a long letter tomorrow to you. Sweet dreams tonight & come visit Mom in my own dreams tonight. I miss you & I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You are my hero, my wind beneath my wings & you are forever in my heart, mind & soul.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, March 21, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Monday evening? Mom is doing ok. Today has been quite the day. Very busy with doing some things around the house & then having some conversations on the telephone with a few friends. Mom was not able to start her test really today as Mark was not able to get to the bank in time to get the money that was needed for my exam. We indeed got the weather was was predicted for us. The snow started around 10:30 pm last night & went through to today until around noon time. In total we got about 5-6" of snow. It was quite cold today & the day was cloudy & overcast. The sun did come out for about 2 hours at the most & then went back to gray skies. Tomorrow the commute for Mark should be tricky as the puddles & snow will freeze over. Who would have thought the 2nd day of Spring & we see this. Got to love the New England weather.....Not...lol!
Mom got to talk to Aunt Beck for a bit today. It was so nice to hear her voice. I miss it when she goes on trips. I miss our talks. Sounds like she came home earlier than planned from this trip. She sounded good. Still trying to play catch up on things but all in all well. Thank you for being with them as they traveled. It means so much to us, Ty. Spoke to Grandpa last night & all is well with him & Debbie. Meme & Bob are well too. Aunt Shirley is in a lot of pain still & is having a hard time & Grammy is doing the best she can daily. No change with her really. Mark is working a lot & the pups are fine. Mom is trying to hold everything all together with life. I know you are watching over us all as well. Thank you so much my sweet precious son. Mom does have one request though... Auntie Kristina called me earlier this evening in a panic....rightfully so. You remember her Dad, the one who wanted to teach you to paint? Well he was rushed to the hospital today for his heart. He was in one hospital & now is being transported to DHMC to the cardiac unit. I guess he was having sharp pains & shortness of breath. Doctors feel he needs to have another stent put in. I hope that is all. Auntie Kristina is so upset. I was happy that she called Mom so that I could help her out. She was having a panic attack at the time & I talked her through it until she was calmed down. She said she called me because she needed Mom & she needed to hear my voice. That made Mom feel special & I was more than happy to help her out. She is like another sister to me & always will be. I love her Mom & Dad. They have always been good to Mom & you when you were here. They loved you very much as well. Can you please watch over her Dad, James for us all? I know Auntie Kristina will be whispering to you as she needs you too. Thank you pumpkin. Again, it means so much to Mom to have you be with us during the hard times & even in the good times. Mom misses you so much. More than words could say. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Mom wishes you were still here with me but because you can't I am so lucky & feel so special to have you as one of my Guardian Angels.
Tonight, once again, Mom will not see any stars or the moon shining brightly in the sky. Hopefully sometime soon they will be out for me to see again. It is going on week 3 since I have seen nothing. I know you are out there doing all the things you need to & want to. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Smile again when you hear it & I will smile when talking to you. I will see you smiling when I close my eyes. I hope that you have a restful night as well. Sweet dreams to you & come visit Mom in my own dreams tonight. Remember that you are my hero, you are forever in my heart, mind & soul & you are the wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you so.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. I almost forgot the daily prayer for today.... Mom's mind is crazy tonight. Anyways... Here it is for March 21~ Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put of my sackcloth & girded me with gladness. Security, loving God, is going to sleep in the assurance that you know our hearts before we speak & are waiting, as soon as you hear from us, to transform our concerns into hope & action, our loneliness into companionship & our despair into dance. Amen.
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Monday evening? Mom is doing ok. Today has been quite the day. Very busy with doing some things around the house & then having some conversations on the telephone with a few friends. Mom was not able to start her test really today as Mark was not able to get to the bank in time to get the money that was needed for my exam. We indeed got the weather was was predicted for us. The snow started around 10:30 pm last night & went through to today until around noon time. In total we got about 5-6" of snow. It was quite cold today & the day was cloudy & overcast. The sun did come out for about 2 hours at the most & then went back to gray skies. Tomorrow the commute for Mark should be tricky as the puddles & snow will freeze over. Who would have thought the 2nd day of Spring & we see this. Got to love the New England weather.....Not...lol!
Mom got to talk to Aunt Beck for a bit today. It was so nice to hear her voice. I miss it when she goes on trips. I miss our talks. Sounds like she came home earlier than planned from this trip. She sounded good. Still trying to play catch up on things but all in all well. Thank you for being with them as they traveled. It means so much to us, Ty. Spoke to Grandpa last night & all is well with him & Debbie. Meme & Bob are well too. Aunt Shirley is in a lot of pain still & is having a hard time & Grammy is doing the best she can daily. No change with her really. Mark is working a lot & the pups are fine. Mom is trying to hold everything all together with life. I know you are watching over us all as well. Thank you so much my sweet precious son. Mom does have one request though... Auntie Kristina called me earlier this evening in a panic....rightfully so. You remember her Dad, the one who wanted to teach you to paint? Well he was rushed to the hospital today for his heart. He was in one hospital & now is being transported to DHMC to the cardiac unit. I guess he was having sharp pains & shortness of breath. Doctors feel he needs to have another stent put in. I hope that is all. Auntie Kristina is so upset. I was happy that she called Mom so that I could help her out. She was having a panic attack at the time & I talked her through it until she was calmed down. She said she called me because she needed Mom & she needed to hear my voice. That made Mom feel special & I was more than happy to help her out. She is like another sister to me & always will be. I love her Mom & Dad. They have always been good to Mom & you when you were here. They loved you very much as well. Can you please watch over her Dad, James for us all? I know Auntie Kristina will be whispering to you as she needs you too. Thank you pumpkin. Again, it means so much to Mom to have you be with us during the hard times & even in the good times. Mom misses you so much. More than words could say. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Mom wishes you were still here with me but because you can't I am so lucky & feel so special to have you as one of my Guardian Angels.
Tonight, once again, Mom will not see any stars or the moon shining brightly in the sky. Hopefully sometime soon they will be out for me to see again. It is going on week 3 since I have seen nothing. I know you are out there doing all the things you need to & want to. Mom will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening out for my voice. Smile again when you hear it & I will smile when talking to you. I will see you smiling when I close my eyes. I hope that you have a restful night as well. Sweet dreams to you & come visit Mom in my own dreams tonight. Remember that you are my hero, you are forever in my heart, mind & soul & you are the wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you so.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. I almost forgot the daily prayer for today.... Mom's mind is crazy tonight. Anyways... Here it is for March 21~ Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put of my sackcloth & girded me with gladness. Security, loving God, is going to sleep in the assurance that you know our hearts before we speak & are waiting, as soon as you hear from us, to transform our concerns into hope & action, our loneliness into companionship & our despair into dance. Amen.
Sunday, March 20, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing today on this Sunday early evening? Hope wherever you may be it is the total opposite weather from what we are about to have. I have no doubt in my mind that you are somewhere warm where the sun is shining on your sweet face. Here where Mom is the weather is again...crappy. The sun was shining earlier this morning but that faded quickly. The clouds rolled in quite quickly & the sky turned the wonderful shade of gray & now it is totally white. The temp is so cold too. It is 31 degrees outside. Starting around 7 pm tonight we are suppose to be getting snow..yep you read correctly...snow. The storm is missing NH & mostly going through the coast of New England. That means right where Mom & Mark live we will be getting anywhere between 5-8" of that nice white stuff...not! Makes me so sad but nothing I can really do so I will be relaxing later tonight & taking a long bubble bath & then cuddling in my nice warm bed. Maybe even a glass of wine is in store for me as well...if it really starts to snow hard then maybe 2 glasses of wine...lol.
Mom really didn't do all that much today outside of the apartment. I did a few things inside today & I actually painted a picture. I am sure that you were with Mom during that time. It came out ok. Really not to crazy about it but I will be trying again tomorrow. I was suppose to be starting my exam but it has to be on Tuesday now. Mark tried to go to the ATM machine 3 different places & it couldn't read his card. It stated that the bank was doing something & wouldn't be done until Monday. Oh well... it is only 1 day so no big deal. It will give me a chance to look over the study guide & do a few things tomorrow seeings how when I do start the test... That is basically all I will be doing from 10 am to 5 pm for the next 6 weeks. It will be crazy but so worth it in the end. I look forward to getting this finished & then going out & looking for employment. We did our taxes today as well. That took a couple hours but it needed to get done & I am not complaining as today was the best day to do it. Other than that I spoke to a couple friends on the phone & left Aunt Beck a message. Spoke t Meme for a few as well. Grandpa will probably call later tonight as he is working right now. Think that is it for now. More updates for you later in the week.
Mom knows she will not be seeing anything once again shining in the sky tonight but I know you are up there or somewhere shining bright for someone who needs it more than I. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so hopefully you will be able to hear my voice. Smile that big sweet smile that I miss so much my sweet precious son. Mom will smile as I am talking to you as I know that is what you want to see from me as well. Hope that your evening is full of everything that you need & want to do. May it be peaceful & restful for you too. Not sure if you really do sleep...my guess is probably not but I still like to tell you too slow down, rest & have sweet dreams. Guess old habits are very hard to break. I guess I will forever tell you sweet dreams, that I miss you beyond words & that I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. I know I will never get tired of saying any of it & I know you will never get tired of hearing Mom tell you.
Before I close my letter to you I just wanted to write to you the daily prayer for today. March 20~ And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts & minds through Christ Jesus. Lord, even though I know worry is useless waste of time & energy, it snares me again & again. Thank you for helping me notice early on that I'm about to wallow in worry once more. As I give this situation to you, Lord, I release my need to worry about it as well. Instead, I look for the blessings in the midst of all that's going on & thank you wholeheartedly for them. I willingly trade my worry for your peace. Amen.
Mom wants you to know & never forget that you are forever in my heart, mind, & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night my sweet son. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi pumpkin! How are you doing today on this Sunday early evening? Hope wherever you may be it is the total opposite weather from what we are about to have. I have no doubt in my mind that you are somewhere warm where the sun is shining on your sweet face. Here where Mom is the weather is again...crappy. The sun was shining earlier this morning but that faded quickly. The clouds rolled in quite quickly & the sky turned the wonderful shade of gray & now it is totally white. The temp is so cold too. It is 31 degrees outside. Starting around 7 pm tonight we are suppose to be getting snow..yep you read correctly...snow. The storm is missing NH & mostly going through the coast of New England. That means right where Mom & Mark live we will be getting anywhere between 5-8" of that nice white stuff...not! Makes me so sad but nothing I can really do so I will be relaxing later tonight & taking a long bubble bath & then cuddling in my nice warm bed. Maybe even a glass of wine is in store for me as well...if it really starts to snow hard then maybe 2 glasses of wine...lol.
Mom really didn't do all that much today outside of the apartment. I did a few things inside today & I actually painted a picture. I am sure that you were with Mom during that time. It came out ok. Really not to crazy about it but I will be trying again tomorrow. I was suppose to be starting my exam but it has to be on Tuesday now. Mark tried to go to the ATM machine 3 different places & it couldn't read his card. It stated that the bank was doing something & wouldn't be done until Monday. Oh well... it is only 1 day so no big deal. It will give me a chance to look over the study guide & do a few things tomorrow seeings how when I do start the test... That is basically all I will be doing from 10 am to 5 pm for the next 6 weeks. It will be crazy but so worth it in the end. I look forward to getting this finished & then going out & looking for employment. We did our taxes today as well. That took a couple hours but it needed to get done & I am not complaining as today was the best day to do it. Other than that I spoke to a couple friends on the phone & left Aunt Beck a message. Spoke t Meme for a few as well. Grandpa will probably call later tonight as he is working right now. Think that is it for now. More updates for you later in the week.
Mom knows she will not be seeing anything once again shining in the sky tonight but I know you are up there or somewhere shining bright for someone who needs it more than I. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so hopefully you will be able to hear my voice. Smile that big sweet smile that I miss so much my sweet precious son. Mom will smile as I am talking to you as I know that is what you want to see from me as well. Hope that your evening is full of everything that you need & want to do. May it be peaceful & restful for you too. Not sure if you really do sleep...my guess is probably not but I still like to tell you too slow down, rest & have sweet dreams. Guess old habits are very hard to break. I guess I will forever tell you sweet dreams, that I miss you beyond words & that I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. I know I will never get tired of saying any of it & I know you will never get tired of hearing Mom tell you.
Before I close my letter to you I just wanted to write to you the daily prayer for today. March 20~ And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts & minds through Christ Jesus. Lord, even though I know worry is useless waste of time & energy, it snares me again & again. Thank you for helping me notice early on that I'm about to wallow in worry once more. As I give this situation to you, Lord, I release my need to worry about it as well. Instead, I look for the blessings in the midst of all that's going on & thank you wholeheartedly for them. I willingly trade my worry for your peace. Amen.
Mom wants you to know & never forget that you are forever in my heart, mind, & soul. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night my sweet son. I love you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, March 19, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Saturday evening? Mom is doing alright. I am so sorry for not writing to you again but honestly these last couple of days have been really busy for me. I know I don't need to explain as you see everything now & I shouldn't feel guilty but I do. I know you are not mad at Mom but Mom is mad at herself. I feel so close to you when I write to you & missing a day is hard for me.
So yesterday Mom went running around for my vehicle. I went to the RMV & registered it & got the stickers & plates. Then Mark took it to go get it inspected. Everything is now all legal & Mom has freedom once again after 4 years of not having a vehicle. It feels so good. I actually drove around all day today running errands. I actually did not need any help & I got to ll the places I needed to go to. I was so proud of myself. I can hear you now saying..." aww...my Mom is growing up "....lol Gosh, Tyler how I miss your voice. I can still hear it in my head. I hope that I never loose that. I want to hear it for the rest of my life in my head. Please help Mom not to ever have your voice leave me. Thank you my sweet precious son.
Mom heard today that Aunt Beck & John are back at home. They seem to be very tired & they are catching their breath. Guess I will chat with her in the next day or 2. Meme called & said she went out with friends today. It was so nice to hear. She seemed to have a really fun time. That made Mom happy. Bob is doing well too. Grandpa called last night. Things are good with both him & Debbie. They all will be coming down to see Mark & Mom next Sunday for Easter. I can't believe how the time is flying by. This will be the 4th year that I haven't spent Easter with you. It makes Mom so sad. I try not to think about it but it is hard. Mom is looking to get you something so that Meme can put it on your stone when they travel back. I haven't found it just yet as I want it to be something special. I think you will be proud of Mom as today I went to the UPS store & I sent Spencer your Jack watch. I had talked to him about it awhile ago but just got around to sending it to him. He still thinks about you daily, Tyler. He calls me Mom still & still says that you are his brother. It warms my heart, makes me smile & cry all at the same time. I know you are smiling down on him & his little family just like you do to us all.
Yesterday, Mom did get terrible news though. Auntie Kristi got in touch with me to let me know that one of our sweet friends lost her Dad in a car accident yesterday. I guess by what she said that he had a heart attack while behind the wheel. They tried to preform CPR on him but he passed while in route to DHMC. She is a mess as I can imagine. My heart hurts for her, her Mom, her brother, her fiance, & their 3 children. We both know that life is not fair at times. I will be praying for them all. I hope that her Dad arrived in Heaven safely & received his wings I know he will be watching over his family now. He will be missed that is for sure.
I think that is all the updates for now but I do have a couple prayers to write out so I can be caught up once again. Here they are. March 18~ How can I rejoice when I'm having " one of those days," Father? How can I pray continually when I feel overwhelmed? When I look to Jesus' example, I find the answers I seek. He didn't stay on his knees all the time, but he did maintain an ongoing dialogue with you. He acknowledged that he would prefer to avoid his cross, but he willingly took it up because it was necessary. He focused on the joy to come later, in due time. I too can give thanks for the good things in my life, even when bad things are bearing down on me. I can keep up a dialogue with you as I go about my day & I can be joyful in a deep abiding sense, knowing that all is in your hands. Amen.
March 19~ Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. Bless me with silent conversations, O God, so I may be with you while doing chores, while singing in the shower, while brushing the cat. Sometimes words don't have to be spoken to be understood & I get your message, too. In the silence that fills & comforts. Amen.
All caught up yet again. The evening sky is almost upon us. The sunset tonight is leaving the sky in all pastel shades of blue, orange, pink & purple. It is really beautiful. Mom is hoping your night is filled with love, peace & rest. May it be all that you need & want it to be. If you sleep tonight Mom is hoping you have the sweetest of dreams. Come visit me in mine tonight to. Be listening out for my voice when Mom whispers to you later. Maybe just maybe we will get to see the stars & moon shining bright tonight. If so you know you will see Mom smiling. Hope you smile too. I miss you so much, Tyler. I miss you like crazy. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You will forever be in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night my sweet precious son.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. Today is Auntie Ann's Birthday. Make sure you go & say hello. Just don't scare her...lol! Love you pumpkin xoxoxo.
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Saturday evening? Mom is doing alright. I am so sorry for not writing to you again but honestly these last couple of days have been really busy for me. I know I don't need to explain as you see everything now & I shouldn't feel guilty but I do. I know you are not mad at Mom but Mom is mad at herself. I feel so close to you when I write to you & missing a day is hard for me.
So yesterday Mom went running around for my vehicle. I went to the RMV & registered it & got the stickers & plates. Then Mark took it to go get it inspected. Everything is now all legal & Mom has freedom once again after 4 years of not having a vehicle. It feels so good. I actually drove around all day today running errands. I actually did not need any help & I got to ll the places I needed to go to. I was so proud of myself. I can hear you now saying..." aww...my Mom is growing up "....lol Gosh, Tyler how I miss your voice. I can still hear it in my head. I hope that I never loose that. I want to hear it for the rest of my life in my head. Please help Mom not to ever have your voice leave me. Thank you my sweet precious son.
Mom heard today that Aunt Beck & John are back at home. They seem to be very tired & they are catching their breath. Guess I will chat with her in the next day or 2. Meme called & said she went out with friends today. It was so nice to hear. She seemed to have a really fun time. That made Mom happy. Bob is doing well too. Grandpa called last night. Things are good with both him & Debbie. They all will be coming down to see Mark & Mom next Sunday for Easter. I can't believe how the time is flying by. This will be the 4th year that I haven't spent Easter with you. It makes Mom so sad. I try not to think about it but it is hard. Mom is looking to get you something so that Meme can put it on your stone when they travel back. I haven't found it just yet as I want it to be something special. I think you will be proud of Mom as today I went to the UPS store & I sent Spencer your Jack watch. I had talked to him about it awhile ago but just got around to sending it to him. He still thinks about you daily, Tyler. He calls me Mom still & still says that you are his brother. It warms my heart, makes me smile & cry all at the same time. I know you are smiling down on him & his little family just like you do to us all.
Yesterday, Mom did get terrible news though. Auntie Kristi got in touch with me to let me know that one of our sweet friends lost her Dad in a car accident yesterday. I guess by what she said that he had a heart attack while behind the wheel. They tried to preform CPR on him but he passed while in route to DHMC. She is a mess as I can imagine. My heart hurts for her, her Mom, her brother, her fiance, & their 3 children. We both know that life is not fair at times. I will be praying for them all. I hope that her Dad arrived in Heaven safely & received his wings I know he will be watching over his family now. He will be missed that is for sure.
I think that is all the updates for now but I do have a couple prayers to write out so I can be caught up once again. Here they are. March 18~ How can I rejoice when I'm having " one of those days," Father? How can I pray continually when I feel overwhelmed? When I look to Jesus' example, I find the answers I seek. He didn't stay on his knees all the time, but he did maintain an ongoing dialogue with you. He acknowledged that he would prefer to avoid his cross, but he willingly took it up because it was necessary. He focused on the joy to come later, in due time. I too can give thanks for the good things in my life, even when bad things are bearing down on me. I can keep up a dialogue with you as I go about my day & I can be joyful in a deep abiding sense, knowing that all is in your hands. Amen.
March 19~ Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you. Bless me with silent conversations, O God, so I may be with you while doing chores, while singing in the shower, while brushing the cat. Sometimes words don't have to be spoken to be understood & I get your message, too. In the silence that fills & comforts. Amen.
All caught up yet again. The evening sky is almost upon us. The sunset tonight is leaving the sky in all pastel shades of blue, orange, pink & purple. It is really beautiful. Mom is hoping your night is filled with love, peace & rest. May it be all that you need & want it to be. If you sleep tonight Mom is hoping you have the sweetest of dreams. Come visit me in mine tonight to. Be listening out for my voice when Mom whispers to you later. Maybe just maybe we will get to see the stars & moon shining bright tonight. If so you know you will see Mom smiling. Hope you smile too. I miss you so much, Tyler. I miss you like crazy. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. You will forever be in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night my sweet precious son.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
P.S. Today is Auntie Ann's Birthday. Make sure you go & say hello. Just don't scare her...lol! Love you pumpkin xoxoxo.
Thursday, March 17, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday night? Happy St. Patrick's Day to you my sweet precious son. I hope you are somewhere celebrating that you were ( are ) Irish & having a green beer. Maybe you are in Ireland seeing all the festivities that are taking place today. I don't know but hopefully wherever you may be you are smiling & laughing. Hopefully you are sharing this day with Pepe as today is his 27 Angelversary. Yep... that is right...27 years ago he chose this to be his day that he would leave us all & go to the heavens above. he got & rightfully earned his Angel wings. He is missed so very much. I think about him every single day just as I do you & Nana too. Please tell him that I love him so much. Give him big hugs & kisses from Mom as well. Thanks Tyler. It sure does mean a lot to Mom.
Sorry that I didn't get the chance to write to you yesterday. Mom had every intention of doing so but my laptop decided that was not going to happen. I went to sign into it & had seen that the computer just crashed. Wouldn't do anything...nothing. Black screen, no mouse, nothing. I waited for Mark to get home & we went to the recovery site & it stated that the hard drive crashed. Mom was pretty upset as I will be starting my certification exam on Monday & I need to have one computer to take the test on & another one to use as reference. Mom had to go out & order a new laptop today. It will take 10 days to get to me. Not much else I could do. So I am sorry for not writing but that is why. Also, for the 1st time in like 1 1/2 years Mom went out & did some painting. It was called a Sip & Paint Bar. You have adult beverages while you paint a step by step painting done with an instructor. It was really so much fun. It was offered here where we live & we took advantage of it. I got to meet some of my neighbors & share some laughs. It felt good. Mom & Mark did not do the painting the way everyone else did though. Mom had to be different & try something new. I think it came out pretty good. Lots of people commented on it. When I got back home I was looking at the picture & said that you must have been with me as it was very Tim Burton (ish). Black, Gray, White with Red & Burgundy in it. I will get a picture of it & post it on here for you in tomorrows letter. I think that you will be pretty happy at what Mom got to do.
The weather today was the same as it has been for the last week...cloudy, dark, gray, & rainy. Weather stated that we were going to get heavy rains tonight & we will be in for a snow storm Sunday into Monday. By the looks of it we could get anywhere between 6-12" of snow. This is just nuts. The weather this winter has been so crazy & off the charts with it being so mild. I really hope that this storm passes us as it is looking like a very heavy & wet snow.Not happy about this but we will have to wait & see. Mom knows once again that I will not be seeing anything shining in the sky tonight but I know you are shining bright for someone in this world that needs it. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Mom is hoping that you have a restful evening doing all that you want & need to. I hope later if you can you get some rest though. Slow down & close those beautiful eyes of yours. Sweet dreams my sweet son. Come see me in my dreams tonight as well. Thanks pumpkin.
Mom doesn't have any updates for you as I did not talk to anyone last night. Chatted with Auntie Kristina today & another friend on the phone. Mom's friend wanted me to tell you hello & to thank you for watching over him & his family when he needed it the most. He got a job & will be starting it on Monday. He had to do a few tests & background check. All cam back good & clear. I am so happy for him. Power of pray really works. I truly believe that. Thank you for all you do for Mom , our family & friends. It truly means so much to each & every one of us.
Before I end this letter I have the 2 daily prayers that I need to catch up on. Here they are. March 16~ And we have known & believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God & God in him. Love. It seems so simple. Love is a gift given. Yet, if we don't overlook it, Lord, we treat it like a gift certificate saved so long it expires. We are down-on-our-knees grateful your gifts of love & grace never expire. Nudge us to use them, for we lose their value each day they go unclaimed. We stay disconnected from you, the one source of all creation. To connect only requires a " Yes! " from us. Hear us shout! Amen.
March 17~ I am Alpha & Omega, the beginning & the ending, saith the Lord, which is, & which was & which is to come, the Almighty. Lord, you know all things, from beginning to end, for you are the eternal, all knowing God. I don't need to fear what is yet to come because I belong to you & you have given me the gift of eternal life. I come to you today to be refreshed by your presence & your Word. Amen.
Mom is caught up once again. I miss you so much, Tyler. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Thursday night? Happy St. Patrick's Day to you my sweet precious son. I hope you are somewhere celebrating that you were ( are ) Irish & having a green beer. Maybe you are in Ireland seeing all the festivities that are taking place today. I don't know but hopefully wherever you may be you are smiling & laughing. Hopefully you are sharing this day with Pepe as today is his 27 Angelversary. Yep... that is right...27 years ago he chose this to be his day that he would leave us all & go to the heavens above. he got & rightfully earned his Angel wings. He is missed so very much. I think about him every single day just as I do you & Nana too. Please tell him that I love him so much. Give him big hugs & kisses from Mom as well. Thanks Tyler. It sure does mean a lot to Mom.
Sorry that I didn't get the chance to write to you yesterday. Mom had every intention of doing so but my laptop decided that was not going to happen. I went to sign into it & had seen that the computer just crashed. Wouldn't do anything...nothing. Black screen, no mouse, nothing. I waited for Mark to get home & we went to the recovery site & it stated that the hard drive crashed. Mom was pretty upset as I will be starting my certification exam on Monday & I need to have one computer to take the test on & another one to use as reference. Mom had to go out & order a new laptop today. It will take 10 days to get to me. Not much else I could do. So I am sorry for not writing but that is why. Also, for the 1st time in like 1 1/2 years Mom went out & did some painting. It was called a Sip & Paint Bar. You have adult beverages while you paint a step by step painting done with an instructor. It was really so much fun. It was offered here where we live & we took advantage of it. I got to meet some of my neighbors & share some laughs. It felt good. Mom & Mark did not do the painting the way everyone else did though. Mom had to be different & try something new. I think it came out pretty good. Lots of people commented on it. When I got back home I was looking at the picture & said that you must have been with me as it was very Tim Burton (ish). Black, Gray, White with Red & Burgundy in it. I will get a picture of it & post it on here for you in tomorrows letter. I think that you will be pretty happy at what Mom got to do.
The weather today was the same as it has been for the last week...cloudy, dark, gray, & rainy. Weather stated that we were going to get heavy rains tonight & we will be in for a snow storm Sunday into Monday. By the looks of it we could get anywhere between 6-12" of snow. This is just nuts. The weather this winter has been so crazy & off the charts with it being so mild. I really hope that this storm passes us as it is looking like a very heavy & wet snow.Not happy about this but we will have to wait & see. Mom knows once again that I will not be seeing anything shining in the sky tonight but I know you are shining bright for someone in this world that needs it. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Mom is hoping that you have a restful evening doing all that you want & need to. I hope later if you can you get some rest though. Slow down & close those beautiful eyes of yours. Sweet dreams my sweet son. Come see me in my dreams tonight as well. Thanks pumpkin.
Mom doesn't have any updates for you as I did not talk to anyone last night. Chatted with Auntie Kristina today & another friend on the phone. Mom's friend wanted me to tell you hello & to thank you for watching over him & his family when he needed it the most. He got a job & will be starting it on Monday. He had to do a few tests & background check. All cam back good & clear. I am so happy for him. Power of pray really works. I truly believe that. Thank you for all you do for Mom , our family & friends. It truly means so much to each & every one of us.
Before I end this letter I have the 2 daily prayers that I need to catch up on. Here they are. March 16~ And we have known & believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God & God in him. Love. It seems so simple. Love is a gift given. Yet, if we don't overlook it, Lord, we treat it like a gift certificate saved so long it expires. We are down-on-our-knees grateful your gifts of love & grace never expire. Nudge us to use them, for we lose their value each day they go unclaimed. We stay disconnected from you, the one source of all creation. To connect only requires a " Yes! " from us. Hear us shout! Amen.
March 17~ I am Alpha & Omega, the beginning & the ending, saith the Lord, which is, & which was & which is to come, the Almighty. Lord, you know all things, from beginning to end, for you are the eternal, all knowing God. I don't need to fear what is yet to come because I belong to you & you have given me the gift of eternal life. I come to you today to be refreshed by your presence & your Word. Amen.
Mom is caught up once again. I miss you so much, Tyler. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Remember you are forever in my heart, mind & soul. You are my hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Tuesday, March 15, 2016
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Tuesday afternoon? Mom is doing ok..could be better but no complaints. The weather again is so cold, heavy rain, gray, bleak....kinda matches my mood today. I am still not feeling all that well still. I did get some sleep last night & that felt great. I needed it so much. Mom has no doubt in my mind that you were with me the whole night & watching over me to make sure that I did get sleep. Thank you so much my sweet precious son. You mean the world to me...always have & always will.
Today, Mom has not really done all that much. The pups have been pretty quiet as well. I am pretty thankful for that as sometimes they can be a handful. Last night was pretty uneventful for me. Had dinner, wrote my letter to you, & watched tv for a bit. Mom went to bed early. I did not even talk on the phone...surprising huh? I am sure you are laughing at that... I can hear you now...lol. Mom is thinking that tonight is going to bed the same way....very quiet & going to bed early again. I know that this daylight savings time is kicking my a** this time for some reason. I know it will get better in the next few days. I am sure of it. I remember that you always had a tough time with the changes. You did do better this time of the year though. It was lighter longer, days were longer & the better weather was coming. This is the time that we loved. We could do so much. Wasn't too cold & wasn't too hot. It was just right. I miss our times together. I miss our talks & our laughs. I miss us playing games & Mom beating you at Monopoly...lol. I miss you beating me at mini golf & us yelling at it while we were playing the dang game. We sure did have a lot of laughs. We had our share of hard times too but no matter what we always said sorry & forgave each other & that meant so much to Mom as I am sure it did for you too. I love you with all my heart, mind & soul. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Please never forget this. I believe that you can hear me, see me typing to you & I know that you feel Mom's love in your soul. That makes me smile. Hope you see that.
Mom does not have any new updates for you but I do have the daily prayer for you today. Here it is. March 15~ But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect & entire, wanting nothing. Oh Lord, what a comfort it is to know that you are working to perfect us even on days when we feel anything but perfect. One day all creation will be perfected. How we look forward to that day when our faith is fully realized & we are complete in you! Amen.
I know that I will not be seeing any stars or moon shining bright again tonight as the sky is so gray & white. It is still raining & the wind is really whipping. It is crazy. I know you will be shining bright for someone who needs it & that makes me proud. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so please be listening out for it later tonight. Smile when you hear my voice, ok? Smile that smile that I loved so much. The smile that I miss. Mom hopes that your night is all that you want & need it to be. May you do all that you need to do & be every where you have to be. Hope that you get to slow down & get some rest. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight as well. Please continue to watch over us all as I know that you do & continue to fly high & fly free. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you unconditionally.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this Tuesday afternoon? Mom is doing ok..could be better but no complaints. The weather again is so cold, heavy rain, gray, bleak....kinda matches my mood today. I am still not feeling all that well still. I did get some sleep last night & that felt great. I needed it so much. Mom has no doubt in my mind that you were with me the whole night & watching over me to make sure that I did get sleep. Thank you so much my sweet precious son. You mean the world to me...always have & always will.
Today, Mom has not really done all that much. The pups have been pretty quiet as well. I am pretty thankful for that as sometimes they can be a handful. Last night was pretty uneventful for me. Had dinner, wrote my letter to you, & watched tv for a bit. Mom went to bed early. I did not even talk on the phone...surprising huh? I am sure you are laughing at that... I can hear you now...lol. Mom is thinking that tonight is going to bed the same way....very quiet & going to bed early again. I know that this daylight savings time is kicking my a** this time for some reason. I know it will get better in the next few days. I am sure of it. I remember that you always had a tough time with the changes. You did do better this time of the year though. It was lighter longer, days were longer & the better weather was coming. This is the time that we loved. We could do so much. Wasn't too cold & wasn't too hot. It was just right. I miss our times together. I miss our talks & our laughs. I miss us playing games & Mom beating you at Monopoly...lol. I miss you beating me at mini golf & us yelling at it while we were playing the dang game. We sure did have a lot of laughs. We had our share of hard times too but no matter what we always said sorry & forgave each other & that meant so much to Mom as I am sure it did for you too. I love you with all my heart, mind & soul. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Please never forget this. I believe that you can hear me, see me typing to you & I know that you feel Mom's love in your soul. That makes me smile. Hope you see that.
Mom does not have any new updates for you but I do have the daily prayer for you today. Here it is. March 15~ But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect & entire, wanting nothing. Oh Lord, what a comfort it is to know that you are working to perfect us even on days when we feel anything but perfect. One day all creation will be perfected. How we look forward to that day when our faith is fully realized & we are complete in you! Amen.
I know that I will not be seeing any stars or moon shining bright again tonight as the sky is so gray & white. It is still raining & the wind is really whipping. It is crazy. I know you will be shining bright for someone who needs it & that makes me proud. Mom will whisper to you as I always do so please be listening out for it later tonight. Smile when you hear my voice, ok? Smile that smile that I loved so much. The smile that I miss. Mom hopes that your night is all that you want & need it to be. May you do all that you need to do & be every where you have to be. Hope that you get to slow down & get some rest. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight as well. Please continue to watch over us all as I know that you do & continue to fly high & fly free. You are my true hero & my wind beneath my wings. Good night, Tyler. I love you unconditionally.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, March 14, 2016
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