Dear Tyler,

Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Tuesday afternoon? The weather today is sunny for the first time in like 3 1/2 weeks. Mom was really surprised at that. It is such a nice change. I was starting to forget what it looked like...lol. Mom is so sorry that my letters to you have been so short or none at all. I am finding that while I am doing this certification exam I have very little time to do much else. In the morning I am doing housework & laundry, walking the dogs & then getting ready for the day. I start my exam & before I know it is is after 4:30 pm & I need to start dinner. By the time dinner is done & dishes are cleaned, Mom is so tired & my eyes are sore from looking at the computers all day that all I do is look at the tv & then go to bed. I am drained. This exam is so much harder than what I has expected it to be. I think I am doing ok though. I have answered over 300 questions & I have only 13 wrong. My average right now is 96%. I know that you are with me every step of the way being my personal cheerleader.....just the way Mom always was with you. Thank you my sweet precious son. It means the world to Mom & I hope that I am making you proud. Mom will try to write to you in the morning so that way by the end of the day when I am tired I can just turn off my computer knowing that your letter is already done. I think that ill be for the best. Please know that even if I do not write to you, it does not mean that you are not in my thoughts. That is not true at all. You are in my thoughts, heart, mind & soul every minute of the day. I look at your picture on my computer desk all day long & silently say hi to you & give you a smile. I hope you hear Mom & you see that. I hope it makes you smile too. I miss you so much my sweet son. There are no words to describe the loss I have when you left this world. I try to understand it all with not wanting the feelings of guilt, anger & hate but some days just get the best of me. I am trying though. I will always be trying for the rest of my life. It is just not easy at all. Please continue to be patience with Mom. Thank you.
 For the last few days Mom has not spoken to anyone but I know that our family is doing just fine. We are all just busy with our schedules to be able to connect right now. I know you are watching over us all & making sure we are all happy, healthy & safe. meme did tell me over facebook that she wishes you would send her a sign to let her know you are around her. Maybe a butterfly or a cardinal or something that she will definitely know it is you...her peanut. Mom would love a sign too. Aunt Beck said she hasn't seen you in a while either. She says that you are a very busy guy & I don't doubt it. When you get a chance just give us all signs, please? I will make sure to be looking out for them. Mom has a couple daily prayers to catch up on so here they are. 
 March 28~ That being justified by his grace, we should be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life. Lord, I do believe! And because of my hope for life with you in eternity, there is all the more meaning for life today. There's meaning in my choices, my relationships, my work, my plan, my worship. It all matters, it all counts, & I live knowing one day I'll stand in your presence with great joy. Amen.
 March 29~Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. We become discouraged when we try to live according to our own time clocks. We want what we want & we want it this very minute. Then, when we don't get it, we sink in the quicksand of hopelessness & defeat. Only when we realize that God is at work in our lives we will begin to relax & let things happen in due season. Fruit will not ripen any faster because we demand it. It will ripen in all its sweet splendor when it is ready in spite of our demands. Amen.
 The sun will be setting in a couple hours. Love that it stays lighter out longer now. I hope that since the sky has been clear all day that Mom will get the chance to see the stars & moon shining bright. Doesn't matter though as I will be whispering to you as I always do so be listening out for my voice. Don't forget to smile! I won't! Mom hopes that your night is filled with all the things you need & want to do & what is being asked of you too. Relax if you can though & slow down. If I know you, you are Mr. Speedy as you were down for so long. Mom gets that & I understand that completely. Sweet dreams to you too. Come visit Mom in my dreams tonight. Remember that you are Mom's true hero & my wind beneath my wings. I love you to the moon & back & all the way around the world. Good night, Ty.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!