Dear Tyler,

Merry Christmas Eve to you in Heaven! How are you doing my sweet precious son? I hope that you are listening to the Choir of the Angels singing, looking at all the lights down below and being with all our family and friends in Heaven. Mom is doing just ok. I am having a hard day. I am sitting back and thinking about all the Christmas' past and it makes me sad that I will never get the chance to make new family traditions and memories with you ever again. I am trying to believe that you would not want me to feel this way. I know you want Mom to be happy and smile. Please forgive Mom as it is not that easy and I have my days that I slip. This is just one of those days and I know that tomorrow, Christmas Day will be another one. I am so sorry, Tyler. I really am trying. I miss you so much. Sometimes this pain is so unbearable for me to handle on a daily basis. I know you are with me and walking beside me but even though I am grateful for that and I really am it sometimes just not enough. 
 So many of my friends have been talking about all that they have been doing with their children during this Holiday Season and I think that is wonderful but it is so hard for me to read at times. I wish that I could do all those things with you again and it hurts Mom and literally breaks my heart to know I can't have what they do and I will never have it again.
 I do hope that you have a beautiful and wonderful Christmas with all our loved ones that crossed over before and after you. I hope that you all have such a celebration up in Heaven. Please give yourself,  Nana, Pepe, Amy, Ron, Larry M, Larry B, Keith, Mattie, Uncle Al, Aunt Jo, Aunt Ida, Albert, Henry and so many others hugs from Mom. I miss them all sweetie, but I miss you the most!
 Everything else is ok here so don't worry. Mark is taking care of Mom just like he told you he would. He is amazing to Mom. Such a dream come true...finally. I know that meant alot to you and he is all that you thought he would be for your Momma. You had such great first impressions when meeting people for the first time. You got it so right when it came to Mark. Wish I would have listened to you more often. Maybe then I wouldn't have gotten hurt so much! Spoke to Bean the other night, Things are good with her. She is looking for another job. Some place closer to her apartment. I hope she finds something that she will love. Grandpa and Debbie are good too. I do need you to watch over Meme more. I know you already know what is going on with her and I would rather not disclose anything on your letter, but I ( Aunt Becky too ) are really worried about her. Please be with her through this tough time. She needs support and I know you can guide her to what needs to take place and you will help her get through this. Thank you, Tyler. Please tell Nana & Pepe to be with her too. I wish I lived closer to Meme to help but I don't and I can't. I can only talk to her on the phone and help from a distance. I love Meme and I hope and pray that things get better soon. Again, Thank you to Nana & Pepe for the help.
 The sky is cloudless and blue. Just so beautiful outside. Tonight when we walk the dogs I will be looking up to the sky to see my bright star shining. Be listening for Mom to whisper to you. I miss you so much. I love you to the moon and back and all the way around the world. Merry Early Christmas to you my sweet precious son.  
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!