Thursday, January 30, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Today is what they call the Black Moon Day. It is where you have more than 1 New Moon in 1 month... t sounds cool. It can only be seen in the daytime though. It is almost nightfall here and it is very cloudy and overcast so we couldn't see anything. Always seems to happen here in Texas when something cool takes place. I hope that you got a chance to see it.
I am so sorry that I didn't get a chance to write to you the last 2 nights. Tuesday during the day I was fine and when it came to early evening and we took the dogs out for a walk I came back in and sat down. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I got a headache, I was cold and couldn't get warm and I started to have the body shakes.. then came the fever. I went to bed and slept all night to awake yesterday with all the same symptoms but the headache was so much worse. The fever was higher and I actually slept until 5:30 pm and woke up to have alittle something to eat and stay awake for a couple hours so I could sleep last night. Today, the headache is slight and tolerable, the fever is not so high but still there, and I have been up since 10:00 am. I actually got out of bed and came o the couch for the day. I am feeling half human which is good. Tomorrow I should be feeling back to myself again. The pups have been with me and by my side the entire time and I am sure you were as well. I know you hate to see Mom sick and would do anything to take it all away. Mark was wonderful again as usual. He was making sure I was resting and taking Tylenol when I could. He made sure that I was hydrated and had food in my stomach. He is so good to me. I am really lucky to have him by my side. Anyways...
Not much else have been going on the last few days. I am awaiting the warmer weather that is coming in tomorrow and the weekend. It is suppose to be 70 -75 degrees and partly cloudy. I will take it. Sunday is the Superbowl. None of our favorite teams are in it but I will still watch it for all the commercials. I did see that the Doritos has one and it has a " doxie " in it. Looks a lot like Ziggy. It is cute and funny! I know you will like that one. There is a new M & M commercial too. Will tell you about that one on Sunday night when I see it. I wish that you were here still so we could watch it together or at least skype and watch it together. I miss you so much. I love you my sweet son. I know I say I miss you but I hope you know I truly do. It comes from my heart when I say it. I don't think I will ever be able to express it to you or anyone on how I really feel... the loneliness, the sadness, the pain, the emptiness that I feel.
Obviously, I have not been able to look up to the sky the last couple nights but I do know that it was overcast and there were no stars shining brightly. I know you still were up there shining and watching over Mom and the rest of our family and friends. I still whispered to you so I hope you heard Mom. No stars tonight either but I will look to the sky and whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for Mom's voice.
I hope you have a wonderful night and it is restful and peaceful for you. Sweet dreams my precious Angel. I miss you so much and I love you beyond words.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Thursday evening? Today is what they call the Black Moon Day. It is where you have more than 1 New Moon in 1 month... t sounds cool. It can only be seen in the daytime though. It is almost nightfall here and it is very cloudy and overcast so we couldn't see anything. Always seems to happen here in Texas when something cool takes place. I hope that you got a chance to see it.
I am so sorry that I didn't get a chance to write to you the last 2 nights. Tuesday during the day I was fine and when it came to early evening and we took the dogs out for a walk I came back in and sat down. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I got a headache, I was cold and couldn't get warm and I started to have the body shakes.. then came the fever. I went to bed and slept all night to awake yesterday with all the same symptoms but the headache was so much worse. The fever was higher and I actually slept until 5:30 pm and woke up to have alittle something to eat and stay awake for a couple hours so I could sleep last night. Today, the headache is slight and tolerable, the fever is not so high but still there, and I have been up since 10:00 am. I actually got out of bed and came o the couch for the day. I am feeling half human which is good. Tomorrow I should be feeling back to myself again. The pups have been with me and by my side the entire time and I am sure you were as well. I know you hate to see Mom sick and would do anything to take it all away. Mark was wonderful again as usual. He was making sure I was resting and taking Tylenol when I could. He made sure that I was hydrated and had food in my stomach. He is so good to me. I am really lucky to have him by my side. Anyways...
Not much else have been going on the last few days. I am awaiting the warmer weather that is coming in tomorrow and the weekend. It is suppose to be 70 -75 degrees and partly cloudy. I will take it. Sunday is the Superbowl. None of our favorite teams are in it but I will still watch it for all the commercials. I did see that the Doritos has one and it has a " doxie " in it. Looks a lot like Ziggy. It is cute and funny! I know you will like that one. There is a new M & M commercial too. Will tell you about that one on Sunday night when I see it. I wish that you were here still so we could watch it together or at least skype and watch it together. I miss you so much. I love you my sweet son. I know I say I miss you but I hope you know I truly do. It comes from my heart when I say it. I don't think I will ever be able to express it to you or anyone on how I really feel... the loneliness, the sadness, the pain, the emptiness that I feel.
Obviously, I have not been able to look up to the sky the last couple nights but I do know that it was overcast and there were no stars shining brightly. I know you still were up there shining and watching over Mom and the rest of our family and friends. I still whispered to you so I hope you heard Mom. No stars tonight either but I will look to the sky and whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for Mom's voice.
I hope you have a wonderful night and it is restful and peaceful for you. Sweet dreams my precious Angel. I miss you so much and I love you beyond words.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, January 27, 2014
Dear Tyler,
How are you doing my sweet son? I hope that you are well on this Monday afternoon. Things here are ok. The weather started out being really nice in the 60's with the sun shining. Now the clouds are rolling in and it is dipping in the temperature hourly. I am watching tv and it says that we are in a Winter Weather Alert. Guess starting 3 am to 6 pm tomorrow we are suppose to get some nasty weather. Some snow, sleet & freezing rain. The tv is already running down the list of things that are cancelled for tomorrow. It makes me laugh because of the weather we are used to in NH but makes sense at what they do down here because they are not equipped with anything to take care of the freezing rain or snow.
Mom is doing ok today. I am pretty tired due to not sleeping but 1 hour last night. Max had a rough night. He was crying and whining every 2 hours or so. Mark & I were taking turns with him last night. He is failing fast. His right eye is completely filmed over and it is a full cataract now. His other eye is starting to do the same. He doesn't hear all that well now and he drinks like there's no tomorrow and sleeps all the time. It is so sad to watch this. I want him to be as well as he can be but the minute I hear the words " he is suffering " I will have to do what I dread but I will not let him suffer. It wouldn't be fair to Max. He is 11 years old and has had a wonderful and spoiled life. If you could watch over him that would be great. Mom would appreciate it. Thanks Tyler!
So... I told you yesterday that I would write all the Lyrics to the song " The Dance " and I will but not today. I found another song that is one of my favorites and I think that you would like it as well. The song is called " Stars ". Here are some of the Lyrics to it:
" I lit a fire with the love you left behind. And it burned wild and crept up the mountainside.I followed your ashes into outer space, I can't look out the window, I can't look at this place. I can't look at the stars.. they make me wonder where you are. Stars...up on Heaven's Boulevard.. And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far, So I, I can't look at the stars. All those times we looked up at the sky, looking out so far, we felt like we could fly. And now I'm all alone in the dark of night. The moon is shining but I can't see the light, and I can't look at the stars..they make me wonder where you are. Stars... up on Heaven's Boulevard...And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far, So I, I can't look at the stars. Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh...Stars...Ohh they make me wonder where you are. Stars... up on Heaven's Boulevard..And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far... So I can't look at the stars. "
What do you think? I love this song. It is so pretty. I am going to probably put that song up here on your blog so I can share it and for others to hear it. I hope you like it Tyler. It has special meaning for Mom to you. I miss you so much and like the song says.. I wonder where you are. I know you are up there but where is there? So many questions for you with no answers. Maybe I will get some when I have another reading. I hope you will come through. I love you pumpkin!
Well, I know I probably won't see the stars in the sky tonight wit the weather coming in but I am hoping that I will be surprised like I was the other night. Either way I will whisper to you so I ope you will be listening for Mom. I hope you have a wonderful and peaceful evening. Sweet dreams my precious son. I miss and love you more than words can say or express to anyone.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
How are you doing my sweet son? I hope that you are well on this Monday afternoon. Things here are ok. The weather started out being really nice in the 60's with the sun shining. Now the clouds are rolling in and it is dipping in the temperature hourly. I am watching tv and it says that we are in a Winter Weather Alert. Guess starting 3 am to 6 pm tomorrow we are suppose to get some nasty weather. Some snow, sleet & freezing rain. The tv is already running down the list of things that are cancelled for tomorrow. It makes me laugh because of the weather we are used to in NH but makes sense at what they do down here because they are not equipped with anything to take care of the freezing rain or snow.
Mom is doing ok today. I am pretty tired due to not sleeping but 1 hour last night. Max had a rough night. He was crying and whining every 2 hours or so. Mark & I were taking turns with him last night. He is failing fast. His right eye is completely filmed over and it is a full cataract now. His other eye is starting to do the same. He doesn't hear all that well now and he drinks like there's no tomorrow and sleeps all the time. It is so sad to watch this. I want him to be as well as he can be but the minute I hear the words " he is suffering " I will have to do what I dread but I will not let him suffer. It wouldn't be fair to Max. He is 11 years old and has had a wonderful and spoiled life. If you could watch over him that would be great. Mom would appreciate it. Thanks Tyler!
So... I told you yesterday that I would write all the Lyrics to the song " The Dance " and I will but not today. I found another song that is one of my favorites and I think that you would like it as well. The song is called " Stars ". Here are some of the Lyrics to it:
" I lit a fire with the love you left behind. And it burned wild and crept up the mountainside.I followed your ashes into outer space, I can't look out the window, I can't look at this place. I can't look at the stars.. they make me wonder where you are. Stars...up on Heaven's Boulevard.. And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far, So I, I can't look at the stars. All those times we looked up at the sky, looking out so far, we felt like we could fly. And now I'm all alone in the dark of night. The moon is shining but I can't see the light, and I can't look at the stars..they make me wonder where you are. Stars... up on Heaven's Boulevard...And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far, So I, I can't look at the stars. Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh...Stars...Ohh they make me wonder where you are. Stars... up on Heaven's Boulevard..And if I know you at all, I know you've gone too far... So I can't look at the stars. "
What do you think? I love this song. It is so pretty. I am going to probably put that song up here on your blog so I can share it and for others to hear it. I hope you like it Tyler. It has special meaning for Mom to you. I miss you so much and like the song says.. I wonder where you are. I know you are up there but where is there? So many questions for you with no answers. Maybe I will get some when I have another reading. I hope you will come through. I love you pumpkin!
Well, I know I probably won't see the stars in the sky tonight wit the weather coming in but I am hoping that I will be surprised like I was the other night. Either way I will whisper to you so I ope you will be listening for Mom. I hope you have a wonderful and peaceful evening. Sweet dreams my precious son. I miss and love you more than words can say or express to anyone.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Sunday, January 26, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hello my sweet son. How are you doing on this Sunday afternoon? Here in Texas it is 70 degrees and sunny outside. Not one cloud just blue skies and a beautiful breeze blowing. The perfect weather for sure. I am so sorry that I didn't get a chance to write to you last night. I was so tired that I actually slept in until 11:30 am. I got up and made brunch and then I was pretty busy during the day doing housework and laundry. Later in the evening Mark and I actually got to speak to his Dad and Step Mom. It was really nice. It was the first time ever hearing their voices. They seems like very sweet people. We finally got to tell them that we were moving again and that we were getting married at the end of this year. It was nice to give them the news! After that we skyped with Marion & Charlie for 1 1/2 hours and didn't finish up with them until almost 9:30 pm. By that time believe it or not I was getting tired. Guess I slept to much during the day. Mark & I played 2 games of Chess..( He won one game and I won the other! ) and then I went to bed. I slept ok during the night but again slept in this morning and woke up at 10:30 am. I actually got right up and started to do laundry again and do a little workout routine, took my shower and then we went to a couple stores. Came back home and took the dogs for a long walk. They are now relaxing and Max is sleeping while Snickers is chewing a bone. I am waiting to hear from Grandpa because we are going to skype him and Debbie in a few minutes.
During my outing today... heading to the store we were listening to the radio and The Dance by Garth Brooks came on. I started to cry. I always think of you when I hear that song. Always have. The lyrics to it are just so true.. I will give you a snippet of the song and I will write the complete song to you tomorrow night.
" Looking back on the memories of, the dance we shared beneath the stars above. For a moment all the world was right, how could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye. And now I'm glad I didn't know. The way it all would end, the way it all would go. Our lives are better left to chance, I would've missed the pain but I'd have to miss The Dance. "
I told you a million times while you were here with Mom and I will say it again. I would do it all over. You were never a burden to me. You were a blessing. You were the light of my life. You were my everything. If God gave me another chance to have you back with me.. I would do it all over. I would take care of you like I did before. I miss you so much Tyler. I really do. I mourn you daily, yes I do, but I miss you so much. I miss my son. I miss everything.. the laughing, the crying, the joking around. The fun times, the good times, and even the sad & bad times. EVERYTHING!!!!
Tonight I will take the pups for another walk and I know I will see the stars in the sky. The Evening sky will be so clear and star filled. I will look to the sky and smile because I know you are up there shining brightly and watching over Mom, Mark and our family and friends. I hope your night is all that you want it to be. Relaxing, peaceful, and whatever else you desire. I love you Tyler with all my heart and soul. To the moon and back and all the way around the world. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Forever & Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hello my sweet son. How are you doing on this Sunday afternoon? Here in Texas it is 70 degrees and sunny outside. Not one cloud just blue skies and a beautiful breeze blowing. The perfect weather for sure. I am so sorry that I didn't get a chance to write to you last night. I was so tired that I actually slept in until 11:30 am. I got up and made brunch and then I was pretty busy during the day doing housework and laundry. Later in the evening Mark and I actually got to speak to his Dad and Step Mom. It was really nice. It was the first time ever hearing their voices. They seems like very sweet people. We finally got to tell them that we were moving again and that we were getting married at the end of this year. It was nice to give them the news! After that we skyped with Marion & Charlie for 1 1/2 hours and didn't finish up with them until almost 9:30 pm. By that time believe it or not I was getting tired. Guess I slept to much during the day. Mark & I played 2 games of Chess..( He won one game and I won the other! ) and then I went to bed. I slept ok during the night but again slept in this morning and woke up at 10:30 am. I actually got right up and started to do laundry again and do a little workout routine, took my shower and then we went to a couple stores. Came back home and took the dogs for a long walk. They are now relaxing and Max is sleeping while Snickers is chewing a bone. I am waiting to hear from Grandpa because we are going to skype him and Debbie in a few minutes.
During my outing today... heading to the store we were listening to the radio and The Dance by Garth Brooks came on. I started to cry. I always think of you when I hear that song. Always have. The lyrics to it are just so true.. I will give you a snippet of the song and I will write the complete song to you tomorrow night.
" Looking back on the memories of, the dance we shared beneath the stars above. For a moment all the world was right, how could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye. And now I'm glad I didn't know. The way it all would end, the way it all would go. Our lives are better left to chance, I would've missed the pain but I'd have to miss The Dance. "
I told you a million times while you were here with Mom and I will say it again. I would do it all over. You were never a burden to me. You were a blessing. You were the light of my life. You were my everything. If God gave me another chance to have you back with me.. I would do it all over. I would take care of you like I did before. I miss you so much Tyler. I really do. I mourn you daily, yes I do, but I miss you so much. I miss my son. I miss everything.. the laughing, the crying, the joking around. The fun times, the good times, and even the sad & bad times. EVERYTHING!!!!
Tonight I will take the pups for another walk and I know I will see the stars in the sky. The Evening sky will be so clear and star filled. I will look to the sky and smile because I know you are up there shining brightly and watching over Mom, Mark and our family and friends. I hope your night is all that you want it to be. Relaxing, peaceful, and whatever else you desire. I love you Tyler with all my heart and soul. To the moon and back and all the way around the world. Sweet dreams my sweet precious son. Forever & Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Friday, January 24, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Just wanted you to know that I just took the pups outside and I looked to the sky. The clouds moved out and the stars there shining brightly. Such a wonderful surprise for Mom. Thank you so much :) I whispered to you...did you hear me? Hope so! I love you bunches my sweet son. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Just wanted you to know that I just took the pups outside and I looked to the sky. The clouds moved out and the stars there shining brightly. Such a wonderful surprise for Mom. Thank you so much :) I whispered to you...did you hear me? Hope so! I love you bunches my sweet son. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Friday evening? Boy is it cold and chilly here in Texas today. It actually got to the freezing temps. It isn't lasting though.. this weekend is suppose to be mid 60's to 70's. The sky is overcast so I will not be able to see the stars shining brightly tonight for the walk with the pups but I know you are shining up there and watching over Mom and all our loved ones. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for Mom tonight!
My day was actually busy and went by fast today. Got up, did some exercises, made breakfast, spoke to friend on the phone for a couple hours, made lunch, did laundry, swept the floor, vacuumed, etc... spoke to Grandpa for 1 1/2 hours on the phone, sat down for 1/2 hour and the needed to start making dinner, finished dinner and did the dishes and then here I am writing to you now. I was on the phone for the most part of the day. The morning was trying to help a friend that is just so heart broken. She is going through some marriage issues and she just feels so alone right now. I tried to tell her what I did in the same situation but for the most part I just listened to her talk and cry. It broke my heart too. Then later on I spoke with Grandpa. He was calling to see how we were doing down here. It was so good to chat with him. I miss him so much. I can't wait to go back to NH for a visit to see Meme and Grandpa plus all other family and friends too. I just wish that you were there. I wish I would be coming home to visit you. I miss you so much. I hope you know this. It is so important to Mom to have you know that when I lost you I lost a part of me as well. I feel 1/2 Human. You were my everything, my whole life and that was taken from me. I wish I could explain it better but I am sure you know exactly what I am trying to say to you. You will always be my everything. Never forget this...ever!
Oh yeah.. before I forget.. today are your buddies Birthday's.. Adam & Spencer! I wished them a Happy Birthday for us both. I told Spencer to have a beer in your Honor.. and that you would enjoy that and get a kick out of it..lol! You should stop in and see them..wish them a Happy Birthday. Let them know you are there but don't scare them...lol!
I also saw a video that Jeremy posted on Facebook today. It was photographs that him and Ron did at Crotched Mtn. It was a short video but really nice. I got teary eyed while watching it. I just kept thinking of you 3 and the times you all had together, the visits when I would be there, and the laughs. I miss those times. I miss you! I miss Ron and I miss Jeremy. I worry about him. I know you watch over him daily. I know you won't let anything happen to him. You both protected each other. You were brothers!!! I wouldn't be surprised if you sat by his bed at night while he slept just to make sure he was ok. It would be something you would do for him. You were always caring of others. You amazed me like no one else could. You will always be my HERO, Tyler. No one will ever take your place. Please know this too.
The night is here and it is getting late. I must close this letter to you now. In a bit I will be walking the dogs for the last time. It is cold so we won't be out too long. Snickers is shaking when he goes outside..lol! I will look to the sky and whisper to you. I love you so much. I miss you my sweet precious son. Have a wonderful and peaceful night. Sweet dreams and continue to watch over us from above. Tell everyone up there hello for me and I miss them too.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing on this Friday evening? Boy is it cold and chilly here in Texas today. It actually got to the freezing temps. It isn't lasting though.. this weekend is suppose to be mid 60's to 70's. The sky is overcast so I will not be able to see the stars shining brightly tonight for the walk with the pups but I know you are shining up there and watching over Mom and all our loved ones. I will whisper to you as I always do. Be listening for Mom tonight!
My day was actually busy and went by fast today. Got up, did some exercises, made breakfast, spoke to friend on the phone for a couple hours, made lunch, did laundry, swept the floor, vacuumed, etc... spoke to Grandpa for 1 1/2 hours on the phone, sat down for 1/2 hour and the needed to start making dinner, finished dinner and did the dishes and then here I am writing to you now. I was on the phone for the most part of the day. The morning was trying to help a friend that is just so heart broken. She is going through some marriage issues and she just feels so alone right now. I tried to tell her what I did in the same situation but for the most part I just listened to her talk and cry. It broke my heart too. Then later on I spoke with Grandpa. He was calling to see how we were doing down here. It was so good to chat with him. I miss him so much. I can't wait to go back to NH for a visit to see Meme and Grandpa plus all other family and friends too. I just wish that you were there. I wish I would be coming home to visit you. I miss you so much. I hope you know this. It is so important to Mom to have you know that when I lost you I lost a part of me as well. I feel 1/2 Human. You were my everything, my whole life and that was taken from me. I wish I could explain it better but I am sure you know exactly what I am trying to say to you. You will always be my everything. Never forget this...ever!
Oh yeah.. before I forget.. today are your buddies Birthday's.. Adam & Spencer! I wished them a Happy Birthday for us both. I told Spencer to have a beer in your Honor.. and that you would enjoy that and get a kick out of it..lol! You should stop in and see them..wish them a Happy Birthday. Let them know you are there but don't scare them...lol!
I also saw a video that Jeremy posted on Facebook today. It was photographs that him and Ron did at Crotched Mtn. It was a short video but really nice. I got teary eyed while watching it. I just kept thinking of you 3 and the times you all had together, the visits when I would be there, and the laughs. I miss those times. I miss you! I miss Ron and I miss Jeremy. I worry about him. I know you watch over him daily. I know you won't let anything happen to him. You both protected each other. You were brothers!!! I wouldn't be surprised if you sat by his bed at night while he slept just to make sure he was ok. It would be something you would do for him. You were always caring of others. You amazed me like no one else could. You will always be my HERO, Tyler. No one will ever take your place. Please know this too.
The night is here and it is getting late. I must close this letter to you now. In a bit I will be walking the dogs for the last time. It is cold so we won't be out too long. Snickers is shaking when he goes outside..lol! I will look to the sky and whisper to you. I love you so much. I miss you my sweet precious son. Have a wonderful and peaceful night. Sweet dreams and continue to watch over us from above. Tell everyone up there hello for me and I miss them too.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Dear Tyler,
How are you this evening my sweet Angel in Heaven? I hope that you are doing alright! Things here with Mom are well. I feel better today. I did get sleep last night so if you were here watching over me... Thank you so much. I needed it. I even did my workout today! I am getting back into my routine slowly but surely. It really feels great. Exercising to me is a stress relief and it helps being less depressed! That is what Mom really needs. It is my biggest outlet at this time.
The weather is so cold here. Not as cold as New England but cold for us in Texas. It has come across the tv that we are in a Winter Advisory for tonight and all day tomorrow. The temps are suppose to drop to 30 degrees and we are suppose to get sleet & freezing rain maybe even some snow tomorrow. Mark received an email stating that the City announced that the weather could be dangerous so they advised all Employers to let there employees work from home if they could or have the day off for their safety. Guess if the weather gets too bad the whole City is shutting down until the sun can come out and melt the ice away. No one here is used to this weather and they don't have any experience driving in it. The City doesn't have a budget either. No equipment to clear the roads, etc... Guess it will be a relaxing day tomorrow and through the weekend here. Just what I like!
Other than that Mom was busy on the phones and the Internet looking at apartments in the new area that we will be headed to in the early summer. Yup..another move for us but this one will be better. We will be back in the winter and cold but closer to family & friends and that is going to be huge for me. I miss our family and friends. It really is lonely down here. Since I left NH last February I have been back home 1 time and that was for you...last June. I haven't been home since. I am so homesick but I try not to say anything to Mark. I know he knows and he would do anything to get me back there for visits if he could. I just feel bad because it is going on 2 1/2 years since he saw his family. Soon we will be closer to everyone. I can't wait and will tell you all the details as I get them!
We are alittle over 27 days out for our trip to Vegas. I got a nice surprise that my friend from California will be coming out the same time we are there so we can visit and catch up on things. I haven't seen her in 21 years. I hope that you will be with Mom while I am there. Watching over us and keeping us safe, but also to have some fun as well. I will need your guidance to help me out if I am going to do any gambling :)
Well I won't be seeing the stars shining brightly this evening but I know you are up there. I will still whisper to you so please be listening. I miss you so much Tyler and I love you to the moon & back and all the way around the world. Please remember this...Always!!! Sweet dreams my precious son. Please continue to watch over Mom and our entire family and friends. Thank you :)
Fly high and fly free... I miss you and I love you. Always, Mommy xoxoxo.Muah!
How are you this evening my sweet Angel in Heaven? I hope that you are doing alright! Things here with Mom are well. I feel better today. I did get sleep last night so if you were here watching over me... Thank you so much. I needed it. I even did my workout today! I am getting back into my routine slowly but surely. It really feels great. Exercising to me is a stress relief and it helps being less depressed! That is what Mom really needs. It is my biggest outlet at this time.
The weather is so cold here. Not as cold as New England but cold for us in Texas. It has come across the tv that we are in a Winter Advisory for tonight and all day tomorrow. The temps are suppose to drop to 30 degrees and we are suppose to get sleet & freezing rain maybe even some snow tomorrow. Mark received an email stating that the City announced that the weather could be dangerous so they advised all Employers to let there employees work from home if they could or have the day off for their safety. Guess if the weather gets too bad the whole City is shutting down until the sun can come out and melt the ice away. No one here is used to this weather and they don't have any experience driving in it. The City doesn't have a budget either. No equipment to clear the roads, etc... Guess it will be a relaxing day tomorrow and through the weekend here. Just what I like!
Other than that Mom was busy on the phones and the Internet looking at apartments in the new area that we will be headed to in the early summer. Yup..another move for us but this one will be better. We will be back in the winter and cold but closer to family & friends and that is going to be huge for me. I miss our family and friends. It really is lonely down here. Since I left NH last February I have been back home 1 time and that was for you...last June. I haven't been home since. I am so homesick but I try not to say anything to Mark. I know he knows and he would do anything to get me back there for visits if he could. I just feel bad because it is going on 2 1/2 years since he saw his family. Soon we will be closer to everyone. I can't wait and will tell you all the details as I get them!
We are alittle over 27 days out for our trip to Vegas. I got a nice surprise that my friend from California will be coming out the same time we are there so we can visit and catch up on things. I haven't seen her in 21 years. I hope that you will be with Mom while I am there. Watching over us and keeping us safe, but also to have some fun as well. I will need your guidance to help me out if I am going to do any gambling :)
Well I won't be seeing the stars shining brightly this evening but I know you are up there. I will still whisper to you so please be listening. I miss you so much Tyler and I love you to the moon & back and all the way around the world. Please remember this...Always!!! Sweet dreams my precious son. Please continue to watch over Mom and our entire family and friends. Thank you :)
Fly high and fly free... I miss you and I love you. Always, Mommy xoxoxo.Muah!
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi sweetheart! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? I hope all is well and you are happy in Heaven. Mom had an off day today. I haven't been sleeping all that well the last 3 nights. I did a little housework today but not much. Had a big headache and just kind of laid low for the most part. I hope I get some sleep tonight. I really need it! I wanted to write a little letter to you before I go lay down for the evening.
I wanted to tell you that I read somewhere that if you come across or see a Cardinal bird near you then that means your loved ones are visiting you. I want you to know for 3 days we had 2 Cardinals around our apartment. They were on the back side near our bedroom. It was during New Years. I thought they were really pretty.. a male and a female. Now that I read that I smiled and said that it must have been you & Amy coming to wish Mark & I a Happy New Year. I hope I am right. If that was you please come visit Mom again. It would mean so much to me. I miss you so much.
I found some more pictures today. It was from your Birthday party 2012. There were some of you, Amy, Ron, Jeremy, Charlie, Marion, Kristi and our family. It made me so sad because in the last 6 months you, Amy & Ron have passed away. Too much loss in such a short time. I wish you all were still here. I miss talking to you 3. I miss hearing you call me Mom and telling me you love me. I miss hearing Ron call me Momma T and I miss joking & talking to Amy.
Last night when I walked the pups the sky was so beautiful. It was full of stars and I saw my one bright one. I talked to you for a few minutes last night. Did you hear Mom? I sure hope so. I will have to let the pups out again before the night is over so I will look to the sky and whisper to you when I see you shining up in Heaven.
I will write a longer letter tomorrow night. Please watch over me and our whole family. Thank you Tyler. I hope that you have a peaceful and quiet evening. Sweet dreams my precious son. I miss you like crazy and I love you more than words could ever say.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
PS. Thanks for watching over Aunt Becky & Uncle John. Received an email stating they arrived in South America late last night :)
Hi sweetheart! How are you doing on this Wednesday evening? I hope all is well and you are happy in Heaven. Mom had an off day today. I haven't been sleeping all that well the last 3 nights. I did a little housework today but not much. Had a big headache and just kind of laid low for the most part. I hope I get some sleep tonight. I really need it! I wanted to write a little letter to you before I go lay down for the evening.
I wanted to tell you that I read somewhere that if you come across or see a Cardinal bird near you then that means your loved ones are visiting you. I want you to know for 3 days we had 2 Cardinals around our apartment. They were on the back side near our bedroom. It was during New Years. I thought they were really pretty.. a male and a female. Now that I read that I smiled and said that it must have been you & Amy coming to wish Mark & I a Happy New Year. I hope I am right. If that was you please come visit Mom again. It would mean so much to me. I miss you so much.
I found some more pictures today. It was from your Birthday party 2012. There were some of you, Amy, Ron, Jeremy, Charlie, Marion, Kristi and our family. It made me so sad because in the last 6 months you, Amy & Ron have passed away. Too much loss in such a short time. I wish you all were still here. I miss talking to you 3. I miss hearing you call me Mom and telling me you love me. I miss hearing Ron call me Momma T and I miss joking & talking to Amy.
Last night when I walked the pups the sky was so beautiful. It was full of stars and I saw my one bright one. I talked to you for a few minutes last night. Did you hear Mom? I sure hope so. I will have to let the pups out again before the night is over so I will look to the sky and whisper to you when I see you shining up in Heaven.
I will write a longer letter tomorrow night. Please watch over me and our whole family. Thank you Tyler. I hope that you have a peaceful and quiet evening. Sweet dreams my precious son. I miss you like crazy and I love you more than words could ever say.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
PS. Thanks for watching over Aunt Becky & Uncle John. Received an email stating they arrived in South America late last night :)
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing today? I hope that you are happy happy happy! I am so sorry that my letter to you last night was short and emotional. It was just a rough day for Mom. I am doing somewhat better today. I got out of bed, finally was able to do my workout after 4 weeks of healing, and did several things I needed to do around the apartment today as well. Now I am cooking dinner as I am writing you this letter. I guess you could say that overall it was a pretty good day.
I am starting to do several things now. You know me with my " list of things " or the " things to do list " that I make. I am starting to get excited to go to Las Vegas and see Celine Dion in concert. It is the most amazing gift that Mark could have given me! He is a real doll. I am making a list of all the things I want to do and see and places to go while we are there. Need to do a lot as we are only there for 4 days! I will be thinking of you the whole time and knowing that you have loved to have been there too. Your love for Poker and all..plus you were sooo good at it! You amazed me at your knowledge of the game and how many times you would win! I am getting a chance to see a Replica of the Eiffel Tower and that is what I can't wait to see as well. You know my love for Paris. I don't care if it is the real one or not. I just think it will be so cool to see it :) My 2nd list is getting things in order and " to do lists " for Mark & Mom's Wedding. As of yesterday we have 10 months before the big day. I know you are in Heaven smiling down on the thought of this. I know you will be there on our special day.. just wish I would be able to witness it and see you in person. I will be missing you so much that day. I will be happy to marry Mark but so sad that you my precious son will not be there to celebrate with Mom and the rest of us. It just isn't fair, Tyler. I miss you so much every day. The pain is so intense. I hate it! I know you can see me when I am sad and in pain and I know it hurts you that you can't comfort me and take it all away. I know that if you could you would. You were such a caring person to everyone. With you being that way I know I did something right while raising you. Enough of this right now or I will start to cry and I really don't want to right now...
Last night I took the pups out and looked up to the sky. There were so many stars above it was really pretty. The sky was jet black and clear. I saw a couple bright stars above and knew 1 was you. I whispered to you so I hope you heard Mom. I will do the same tonight just as I always do. The weather here was another beautiful day and it will be until Friday. I will be able to see you shining brightly every night! That makes me smile and happy :) I guess the weather here calls for low temps and freezing rain. We shall see. It will be interesting if it happens. No one down here is used to that and I bet the whole city will be shut down. It is funny like that in the South! I will let you know what happens. New England is getting hit with another Snow Storm right now. I hope that all our loved ones are safe. Please watch over them for Mom. Thanks Tyler!
I hope that you have a wonderful evening in Heaven. I hope that is is quiet and peaceful for you. Fly high and fly free. Sweet dreams my precious Angel. I love you with all my heart and soul. I miss you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
PS. Make sure to go visit Aunt Becky in South America these next few weeks. She should be landing in Ecuador in a couple hours! Make them safe too. Thanks love!
Hi my sweet son. How are you doing today? I hope that you are happy happy happy! I am so sorry that my letter to you last night was short and emotional. It was just a rough day for Mom. I am doing somewhat better today. I got out of bed, finally was able to do my workout after 4 weeks of healing, and did several things I needed to do around the apartment today as well. Now I am cooking dinner as I am writing you this letter. I guess you could say that overall it was a pretty good day.
I am starting to do several things now. You know me with my " list of things " or the " things to do list " that I make. I am starting to get excited to go to Las Vegas and see Celine Dion in concert. It is the most amazing gift that Mark could have given me! He is a real doll. I am making a list of all the things I want to do and see and places to go while we are there. Need to do a lot as we are only there for 4 days! I will be thinking of you the whole time and knowing that you have loved to have been there too. Your love for Poker and all..plus you were sooo good at it! You amazed me at your knowledge of the game and how many times you would win! I am getting a chance to see a Replica of the Eiffel Tower and that is what I can't wait to see as well. You know my love for Paris. I don't care if it is the real one or not. I just think it will be so cool to see it :) My 2nd list is getting things in order and " to do lists " for Mark & Mom's Wedding. As of yesterday we have 10 months before the big day. I know you are in Heaven smiling down on the thought of this. I know you will be there on our special day.. just wish I would be able to witness it and see you in person. I will be missing you so much that day. I will be happy to marry Mark but so sad that you my precious son will not be there to celebrate with Mom and the rest of us. It just isn't fair, Tyler. I miss you so much every day. The pain is so intense. I hate it! I know you can see me when I am sad and in pain and I know it hurts you that you can't comfort me and take it all away. I know that if you could you would. You were such a caring person to everyone. With you being that way I know I did something right while raising you. Enough of this right now or I will start to cry and I really don't want to right now...
Last night I took the pups out and looked up to the sky. There were so many stars above it was really pretty. The sky was jet black and clear. I saw a couple bright stars above and knew 1 was you. I whispered to you so I hope you heard Mom. I will do the same tonight just as I always do. The weather here was another beautiful day and it will be until Friday. I will be able to see you shining brightly every night! That makes me smile and happy :) I guess the weather here calls for low temps and freezing rain. We shall see. It will be interesting if it happens. No one down here is used to that and I bet the whole city will be shut down. It is funny like that in the South! I will let you know what happens. New England is getting hit with another Snow Storm right now. I hope that all our loved ones are safe. Please watch over them for Mom. Thanks Tyler!
I hope that you have a wonderful evening in Heaven. I hope that is is quiet and peaceful for you. Fly high and fly free. Sweet dreams my precious Angel. I love you with all my heart and soul. I miss you.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
PS. Make sure to go visit Aunt Becky in South America these next few weeks. She should be landing in Ecuador in a couple hours! Make them safe too. Thanks love!
Monday, January 20, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. What can I say??? Today is definitely a Monday for sure...With everything else that is going on... it sucks that I can't start my letter to you the way I normally do. It is just too hard today. As I am writing this I looked at the clock and got goosebumps.. I started this the exact time you passed away 7 months ago. Wow.. so hard to believe that 7 months have gone by so quickly. I remember the day so vividly. The things going on in the hospital room, the family that was with you surrounded by your bedside, the noise outside your room but the silence within it. The horror of what was going to take place in a matter of minutes. Mom holding your hand telling you I loved you as you slipped away. Knowing I would never see or hear your voice again. The last 7 months is a constant nightmare for me...ugh!!! Some days I wish I was dreaming and this would all go away. I would wake up and know that you are still here and alive & well. Wishful thinking on my part.
I am trying so hard to move forward. Nothing will ever be the same for Mom again. Time does not get easier it is just different. I do the normal things still like say "oh I have to call Tyler before it gets to late " or " I need to skype Tyler " and then remember that I can't because you won't be on the other end. It sucks and it hurts deeply. Everyone misses you. I have many people tell me that they miss you, they miss your jokes, your smile, your laughter, etc... It makes me smile to know that you are thought of constantly and not just by Mom. No one misses you more than me that for sure.
You are forever in my heart and that is where you will always stay. I hope that you are in Heaven flying high and flying free my precious Angel above. Tonight I will look to the sky and see you shining brightly. I will whisper to you so be listening for Mom.
I love you with all my heart and soul. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. Sweet Dreams Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. What can I say??? Today is definitely a Monday for sure...With everything else that is going on... it sucks that I can't start my letter to you the way I normally do. It is just too hard today. As I am writing this I looked at the clock and got goosebumps.. I started this the exact time you passed away 7 months ago. Wow.. so hard to believe that 7 months have gone by so quickly. I remember the day so vividly. The things going on in the hospital room, the family that was with you surrounded by your bedside, the noise outside your room but the silence within it. The horror of what was going to take place in a matter of minutes. Mom holding your hand telling you I loved you as you slipped away. Knowing I would never see or hear your voice again. The last 7 months is a constant nightmare for me...ugh!!! Some days I wish I was dreaming and this would all go away. I would wake up and know that you are still here and alive & well. Wishful thinking on my part.
I am trying so hard to move forward. Nothing will ever be the same for Mom again. Time does not get easier it is just different. I do the normal things still like say "oh I have to call Tyler before it gets to late " or " I need to skype Tyler " and then remember that I can't because you won't be on the other end. It sucks and it hurts deeply. Everyone misses you. I have many people tell me that they miss you, they miss your jokes, your smile, your laughter, etc... It makes me smile to know that you are thought of constantly and not just by Mom. No one misses you more than me that for sure.
You are forever in my heart and that is where you will always stay. I hope that you are in Heaven flying high and flying free my precious Angel above. Tonight I will look to the sky and see you shining brightly. I will whisper to you so be listening for Mom.
I love you with all my heart and soul. To the moon & back & all the way around the world. Sweet Dreams Tyler.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Sunday, January 19, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi sweetheart. I hope you day was all that it could be. Our Sunday was pretty laid back. Had to go to the store and pick stuff up for cleaning the apartment and then we took the pups for a walk. Wanted to get out and enjoy the weather. The skies were so blue and no clouds at all. The sun was shining and it was warm today. Just so nice. Came home and made cookies and watched Football. I thought of you when making the cookies. I whispered to you..did you hear Mom? The Patriots were in the play off game today and sucked really bad! The Superbowl will be played by Denver Broncos and the Seattle Seahawks. I actually don't think it will be a game though. I believe it will be a slaughter. My bet is on the Broncos winning. They have had a great season. Didn't do much of anything else. Just a quiet day which was nice.
Oh... you will get a kick out of this though....I went to wash our comforter from our bed. Put it in the washing machine and it made noises because it was a heavy load..no biggie. Put it in the dryer.. that was another story. Did things around the house and decided to check on the progress.. the comforter seemed to be mostly dry so I started to take it out and then noticed a weird smell..like something was burnt. Pulled the comforter all the way out and saw that it got ripped and that it had holes throughout. It was indeed burnt on both sides and smelled soooo bad! To say the least it was rolled up and thrown away. Ugh.. leave it to Mom to do something like that huh??? Yup... I know I can see you rolling your eyes and saying " Oh Mom " and then laughing about it. Makes me smile to know I can still hear your voice in my head. I can hear you say " Hi Mom and I love you ". I never want to lose that sound..EVER!!! I miss you so much and I love you beyond anything else. Please please please always know this and remember this!!!
Spoke to Aunt Becky tonight. They are headed out tomorrow morning for their trip to South America. They will be gone for 6 weeks. They fly out Tuesday morning. Please watch over them and make sure they get there safely. I have been chatting with Aunt Becky a couple times weekly for the last 7 months and it is so nice. It will be weird not speaking to her for 6 weeks. Makes me kind of sad. I am happy for her as she is looking forward to the trip and getting out of the cold and into some warmer weather :). She was telling me the other day that she went walking and when she went around the corner she saw a Golden Eagle. Aunt Beck said it was the day that I posted the Eagle picture on here that said " Fly High & Fly Free ". When she told me that I thought that was so cool. It made me smile knowing that you were looking after her.
Tonight I will look to the sky and see you shining brightly. Be listening for me to whisper to you. Have a peaceful night my sweet son. My precious Angel above. Sweet dreams. I miss you and I love you to the moon & back. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi sweetheart. I hope you day was all that it could be. Our Sunday was pretty laid back. Had to go to the store and pick stuff up for cleaning the apartment and then we took the pups for a walk. Wanted to get out and enjoy the weather. The skies were so blue and no clouds at all. The sun was shining and it was warm today. Just so nice. Came home and made cookies and watched Football. I thought of you when making the cookies. I whispered to you..did you hear Mom? The Patriots were in the play off game today and sucked really bad! The Superbowl will be played by Denver Broncos and the Seattle Seahawks. I actually don't think it will be a game though. I believe it will be a slaughter. My bet is on the Broncos winning. They have had a great season. Didn't do much of anything else. Just a quiet day which was nice.
Oh... you will get a kick out of this though....I went to wash our comforter from our bed. Put it in the washing machine and it made noises because it was a heavy load..no biggie. Put it in the dryer.. that was another story. Did things around the house and decided to check on the progress.. the comforter seemed to be mostly dry so I started to take it out and then noticed a weird smell..like something was burnt. Pulled the comforter all the way out and saw that it got ripped and that it had holes throughout. It was indeed burnt on both sides and smelled soooo bad! To say the least it was rolled up and thrown away. Ugh.. leave it to Mom to do something like that huh??? Yup... I know I can see you rolling your eyes and saying " Oh Mom " and then laughing about it. Makes me smile to know I can still hear your voice in my head. I can hear you say " Hi Mom and I love you ". I never want to lose that sound..EVER!!! I miss you so much and I love you beyond anything else. Please please please always know this and remember this!!!
Spoke to Aunt Becky tonight. They are headed out tomorrow morning for their trip to South America. They will be gone for 6 weeks. They fly out Tuesday morning. Please watch over them and make sure they get there safely. I have been chatting with Aunt Becky a couple times weekly for the last 7 months and it is so nice. It will be weird not speaking to her for 6 weeks. Makes me kind of sad. I am happy for her as she is looking forward to the trip and getting out of the cold and into some warmer weather :). She was telling me the other day that she went walking and when she went around the corner she saw a Golden Eagle. Aunt Beck said it was the day that I posted the Eagle picture on here that said " Fly High & Fly Free ". When she told me that I thought that was so cool. It made me smile knowing that you were looking after her.
Tonight I will look to the sky and see you shining brightly. Be listening for me to whisper to you. Have a peaceful night my sweet son. My precious Angel above. Sweet dreams. I miss you and I love you to the moon & back. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son. How are you this Saturday evening? I hope that you are well. Mom is doing ok. I had a pretty exciting day. Our dog sitter came over like she usually does on Saturday afternoons. Mom had an appointment at a Bridal Shop for looking at dresses for Marion & Charlie's wedding. I didn't really see much as they didn't have a great selection in what I needed. I did try on a dress and it was ok. I ended up ordering 1 on line so I hope it will look good on Mom and flattering. What I did get and I was not expecting it was to find MY Wedding Dress. It is really pretty, Tyler. It is a full satin white princess style ball gown with rouching on the bodice and the bottom looks like layers of snow falling. I picked out a sash to go with it and that has sparkle and bling on it. It is just enough. It is pretty. I wish I could have skyped you so that you could have seen Mom. It makes me sad that I couldn't but somehow I know you saw me today and you were smiling telling me that I looked beautiful like you always did. Mark & I's wedding day is going to be the wedding I always dreamed of but there will be 2 people absent from the guest list... You & Amy. It breaks my heart to know that I can't have you both there with us to celebrate our day. I plan on doing something very special for you 2 though. I have found these white beautiful set of Angel Wings that we will put on the back side of 2 empty chairs to represent You & Amy that day. I hope that you to will fly in and have a seat and be with us that day. It would mean the world to Mom if you both could do that for Mark & I. I know that if you did...Amy would be right by your side saying" I did this Tyler.. I am responsible for this." I can totally see this in my mind. You both will be smiling and laughing. Just wish I would be able to see this with my own eyes. Maybe on our special day you can show me a sign and let me know you are there. You have a few months so I am sure you can and will think of something.
The rest of my day was the usual.. grocery shopping and a walk for the pups. The weather was just beautiful here. Sunny & in the mid 70's. Going to be this way for the whole week. I really have to say I am loving this weather right now :) Guess according to Meme it was snowing pretty bad out this afternoon and evening. I am sure not missing that at all!!!!
Things seem to be going well for our family back home so that is nice to hear for a change. Thank you for all your help and love for them. It did make a difference. You never cease to amaze me!!!! I love you so much for that and everything else. You are my everything!!!! Just always know this and remember this :)
I will be taking a walk with the pups later on so be listening for Mom to whisper to you. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. Have a wonderful night up in Heaven and shine brightly as I know you always do. Sweet Dreams, Tyler. Too the moon & back and all the way around the world....
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son. How are you this Saturday evening? I hope that you are well. Mom is doing ok. I had a pretty exciting day. Our dog sitter came over like she usually does on Saturday afternoons. Mom had an appointment at a Bridal Shop for looking at dresses for Marion & Charlie's wedding. I didn't really see much as they didn't have a great selection in what I needed. I did try on a dress and it was ok. I ended up ordering 1 on line so I hope it will look good on Mom and flattering. What I did get and I was not expecting it was to find MY Wedding Dress. It is really pretty, Tyler. It is a full satin white princess style ball gown with rouching on the bodice and the bottom looks like layers of snow falling. I picked out a sash to go with it and that has sparkle and bling on it. It is just enough. It is pretty. I wish I could have skyped you so that you could have seen Mom. It makes me sad that I couldn't but somehow I know you saw me today and you were smiling telling me that I looked beautiful like you always did. Mark & I's wedding day is going to be the wedding I always dreamed of but there will be 2 people absent from the guest list... You & Amy. It breaks my heart to know that I can't have you both there with us to celebrate our day. I plan on doing something very special for you 2 though. I have found these white beautiful set of Angel Wings that we will put on the back side of 2 empty chairs to represent You & Amy that day. I hope that you to will fly in and have a seat and be with us that day. It would mean the world to Mom if you both could do that for Mark & I. I know that if you did...Amy would be right by your side saying" I did this Tyler.. I am responsible for this." I can totally see this in my mind. You both will be smiling and laughing. Just wish I would be able to see this with my own eyes. Maybe on our special day you can show me a sign and let me know you are there. You have a few months so I am sure you can and will think of something.
The rest of my day was the usual.. grocery shopping and a walk for the pups. The weather was just beautiful here. Sunny & in the mid 70's. Going to be this way for the whole week. I really have to say I am loving this weather right now :) Guess according to Meme it was snowing pretty bad out this afternoon and evening. I am sure not missing that at all!!!!
Things seem to be going well for our family back home so that is nice to hear for a change. Thank you for all your help and love for them. It did make a difference. You never cease to amaze me!!!! I love you so much for that and everything else. You are my everything!!!! Just always know this and remember this :)
I will be taking a walk with the pups later on so be listening for Mom to whisper to you. I miss you so much my sweet precious son. Have a wonderful night up in Heaven and shine brightly as I know you always do. Sweet Dreams, Tyler. Too the moon & back and all the way around the world....
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Friday, January 17, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this cool crystal clear evening? I always wonder when I ask you if you are ever in the night time and it is dark in Heaven as well like we get or is it always bright, blue skies and sunny...hmm.. just curious. Today was another beautiful day here in Texas. It was sunny and in the 70's. The perfect weather. The weather we loved to go walking and just talk. How I miss those times. What I wouldn't do to have just one more with you. I would go on the longest walk and talk to you about everything and anything for hours. I would just want to memorize your voice, your smile, your face, just everything! I miss you so much. I just can't believe in 3 days it will be 7 months that you passed. Doesn't seem possible but yet it feels like it has been years. It is so hard to explain. Days run into weeks and then months. I sometimes forget the days and everything gets scrambled up for me. 7 months with out you has been pure hell. It hurts on the inside so much and on the outside no one would ever know what has happened. I put on that smile and just go about my day. The night time and the times where I have nothing to do is the worst. The silence is murder to me. I have been very fortunate that the last couple weeks Mark has worked from the apartment. It is so nice to not be alone all the time. I know he is working and I have to be quiet and let him do his job but that is ok. It is just nice to see someone here with me and not just the dogs. I can actually talk to someone and hear another voice. It was lonely during the days being by myself. It got pretty depressing for Mom. I watch tv and did a lot of crying. I still cry when I am in the bedroom or living room and alone even when Mark is home. It is going to be this way for awhile. It is the process of grieving. I am trying so hard, Tyler. I want to make you proud of me. I want you to see me smile, laugh and try to enjoy life. I know by doing this it helps you grow in the Spiritual World and I would do nothing to hold you back from learning, growing, and for you to do all that you can and want. I want you to be so happy. I want you to smile that beautiful smile that I love and share it with the Angels above. I want you to learn so that when it is my time to be called home and be with you you can fill me in and we can be ready for our next life time together. Our next journey and adventure. I look forward to this as I hope you are too :)
My day was really uneventful for the most part. Did laundry and went shopping for some under garments for my dress. It was a success! Happy that I don't need to think about that anymore. I have an appointment tomorrow at a Bridal Shop to look at dresses for Marion & Charlie's wedding in June. I have to get a Bridesmaid dress. I am in a color called Lapis.. a shade of purple. It looks pretty so I am excited to see what they have for me to try on. Hope they have several for me to choose from. I want to look my best for them on their special day! I will let you know tomorrow night just how it went. If you like I would love for you to be there and come along. Help me choose and give me a sign which one you would like best. It would mean a lot to Mom. I miss the times you would help me out and make decisions. You made things easier at times for me and for that I am thankful. I love you, Tyler. More than words can say!
Went and walked the pups already. I whispered to you. Hope you heard me. The night sky is so clear and the stars are shining above. 1 star was really brighter than the rest. I know that was you. It made me smile. When I take them out again I will talk to you before I head to bed for the evening. be listening for Mom!
I hope you have a wonderful night my precious son. Please watch over me and all our family and friends. I miss you so much and I love you to the moon & back. Forever. Sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you doing on this cool crystal clear evening? I always wonder when I ask you if you are ever in the night time and it is dark in Heaven as well like we get or is it always bright, blue skies and sunny...hmm.. just curious. Today was another beautiful day here in Texas. It was sunny and in the 70's. The perfect weather. The weather we loved to go walking and just talk. How I miss those times. What I wouldn't do to have just one more with you. I would go on the longest walk and talk to you about everything and anything for hours. I would just want to memorize your voice, your smile, your face, just everything! I miss you so much. I just can't believe in 3 days it will be 7 months that you passed. Doesn't seem possible but yet it feels like it has been years. It is so hard to explain. Days run into weeks and then months. I sometimes forget the days and everything gets scrambled up for me. 7 months with out you has been pure hell. It hurts on the inside so much and on the outside no one would ever know what has happened. I put on that smile and just go about my day. The night time and the times where I have nothing to do is the worst. The silence is murder to me. I have been very fortunate that the last couple weeks Mark has worked from the apartment. It is so nice to not be alone all the time. I know he is working and I have to be quiet and let him do his job but that is ok. It is just nice to see someone here with me and not just the dogs. I can actually talk to someone and hear another voice. It was lonely during the days being by myself. It got pretty depressing for Mom. I watch tv and did a lot of crying. I still cry when I am in the bedroom or living room and alone even when Mark is home. It is going to be this way for awhile. It is the process of grieving. I am trying so hard, Tyler. I want to make you proud of me. I want you to see me smile, laugh and try to enjoy life. I know by doing this it helps you grow in the Spiritual World and I would do nothing to hold you back from learning, growing, and for you to do all that you can and want. I want you to be so happy. I want you to smile that beautiful smile that I love and share it with the Angels above. I want you to learn so that when it is my time to be called home and be with you you can fill me in and we can be ready for our next life time together. Our next journey and adventure. I look forward to this as I hope you are too :)
My day was really uneventful for the most part. Did laundry and went shopping for some under garments for my dress. It was a success! Happy that I don't need to think about that anymore. I have an appointment tomorrow at a Bridal Shop to look at dresses for Marion & Charlie's wedding in June. I have to get a Bridesmaid dress. I am in a color called Lapis.. a shade of purple. It looks pretty so I am excited to see what they have for me to try on. Hope they have several for me to choose from. I want to look my best for them on their special day! I will let you know tomorrow night just how it went. If you like I would love for you to be there and come along. Help me choose and give me a sign which one you would like best. It would mean a lot to Mom. I miss the times you would help me out and make decisions. You made things easier at times for me and for that I am thankful. I love you, Tyler. More than words can say!
Went and walked the pups already. I whispered to you. Hope you heard me. The night sky is so clear and the stars are shining above. 1 star was really brighter than the rest. I know that was you. It made me smile. When I take them out again I will talk to you before I head to bed for the evening. be listening for Mom!
I hope you have a wonderful night my precious son. Please watch over me and all our family and friends. I miss you so much and I love you to the moon & back. Forever. Sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi sweetie! How are you doing today up in Heaven? I hope you are having a wonderful day. I hope that it is just as sunny and warm there as it it here for Mom. Today was 75 degrees, blue skies and cloudless. You know what that means.. yup.. the night sky will be clear so that I can see the stars shining but most importantly I can see you being the brightest one in the sky :)
My day was busy again. I made breakfast and then I did what I said I was going to do. I went through and sorted all the pictures. It was really nice to go through them. They were from when Mom was in labor for you, to you being born, the Make a Wish motorcycle run, to you starting preschool all the way to you graduating High School. There were pictures of you and your friends from Exeter and Crothched Mtn as well. I even had pictures from our 1st trip to Florida to the last one we took. So many pictures and so many memories. Each picture I looked at brought me back in time to that day like it was yesterday. It made me smile and remember all the fun we had as you grew up and got older. I was surprised that I didn't cry but I sure did laugh a few times. I talked to you during this time. I hope that you were with me and heard what I said.
Just had to take a few minutes to go outside and walk the pups. It is so gorgeous outside. We took them for a little walk and the stars are out shining brightly. I whispered to you... did you hear Mom? I sure hope so. I will have to take them out again later so I will be sure to talk to you again before going to bed.
Spoke to Meme just a few minutes ago as well. Bob is home from the hospital. He was resting and I woke Meme up so we didn't talk long. She did not seem like she was in a very good mood. Didn't say much at all. Spoke to Aunt Becky and she said that Meme and Bob got into an argument earlier tonight after he got home. Things there in that house are not the greatest and I wish things could be different. If things don't change soon then I am afraid that the worst things that could happen will. Can you please go be with them both? Watch over them and if you can help them out? Thanks Tyler. I do all that I can from a distance but it just isn't helping.
Well, Mom is going to call it a night. I am going to go watch some tv for a couple hours and then head to bed. I didn't sleep all that much last night. I hope you have a peaceful evening. May it be all that you want it to be. Fly high and fly free my precious son. I miss you so much and I love you beyond words. To the moon & back. Sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
PS. I will be posting a picture I found of an Eagle. I know I won't have to put a title with it as you will know the meaning behind it and the symbolization of the picture. BTW.. I still have my Eagle feather :) I love you so much!!!
Hi sweetie! How are you doing today up in Heaven? I hope you are having a wonderful day. I hope that it is just as sunny and warm there as it it here for Mom. Today was 75 degrees, blue skies and cloudless. You know what that means.. yup.. the night sky will be clear so that I can see the stars shining but most importantly I can see you being the brightest one in the sky :)
My day was busy again. I made breakfast and then I did what I said I was going to do. I went through and sorted all the pictures. It was really nice to go through them. They were from when Mom was in labor for you, to you being born, the Make a Wish motorcycle run, to you starting preschool all the way to you graduating High School. There were pictures of you and your friends from Exeter and Crothched Mtn as well. I even had pictures from our 1st trip to Florida to the last one we took. So many pictures and so many memories. Each picture I looked at brought me back in time to that day like it was yesterday. It made me smile and remember all the fun we had as you grew up and got older. I was surprised that I didn't cry but I sure did laugh a few times. I talked to you during this time. I hope that you were with me and heard what I said.
Just had to take a few minutes to go outside and walk the pups. It is so gorgeous outside. We took them for a little walk and the stars are out shining brightly. I whispered to you... did you hear Mom? I sure hope so. I will have to take them out again later so I will be sure to talk to you again before going to bed.
Spoke to Meme just a few minutes ago as well. Bob is home from the hospital. He was resting and I woke Meme up so we didn't talk long. She did not seem like she was in a very good mood. Didn't say much at all. Spoke to Aunt Becky and she said that Meme and Bob got into an argument earlier tonight after he got home. Things there in that house are not the greatest and I wish things could be different. If things don't change soon then I am afraid that the worst things that could happen will. Can you please go be with them both? Watch over them and if you can help them out? Thanks Tyler. I do all that I can from a distance but it just isn't helping.
Well, Mom is going to call it a night. I am going to go watch some tv for a couple hours and then head to bed. I didn't sleep all that much last night. I hope you have a peaceful evening. May it be all that you want it to be. Fly high and fly free my precious son. I miss you so much and I love you beyond words. To the moon & back. Sweet dreams.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
PS. I will be posting a picture I found of an Eagle. I know I won't have to put a title with it as you will know the meaning behind it and the symbolization of the picture. BTW.. I still have my Eagle feather :) I love you so much!!!
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi peanut, how are you doing tonight? I hope you are well. I just came in from walking the pups and I saw my bright star in the sky. I whispered to you.... did you hear Mom? I hope so. I will have to walk the pups again later so I will make sure to whisper to you later tonight as well. The sky is so clear and cloudless. It is a crisp evening but nice. Today was a sunny day in the 70's so I will take it. It sometimes is hard to believe it is the middle of January with the weather we are having here. Never have experienced anything like it before but I am sure enjoying it.
Just spoke to Meme and she said that the weather up in NH is awful. Lots of cold weather with freezing rain and ice. There have been quite a few accidents around that area as well. Just so sad. I worry about everyone who has to drive in it. Makes me feel better when I know our loved ones are safe at home. I know you are with them as well when they are driving so thank you from the bottom of my heart. It means so much to Mom.
Guess Bob isn't getting out. They keep pushing the discharge date back. Still having trouble dissolving the blood clot. I hope they get in under control soon. I know he wants to get out of there. I know you know what is going on and what will happen way before we all do. Can you please still continue to watch over Bob? Thanks Tyler. Again it means a lot to Mom and everyone else.
My day was pretty busy. I didn't sleep all that well last night because I was so tired yesterday afternoon and the nice nap I took didn't help me at all..ugh! I did however get up around 9 am and I made a nice breakfast for Mark & I, did all the dishes, did some housework, and I went through all my trunks in the apartment. I looked at what each one had in them and figured out what could stay and what could go. I found a lot of pictures and put them all in 1 box so I know where they all are. Later I will go through and make sure that everything is in order. I found your TMNT school bus and I gave it to a little boy who would enjoy it like you did. I know you wouldn't mind. It was hard for me to give it up though. I teared up but then I was ok. I couldn't give up your Splinter figure though. I kept that. I could still see you as a little boy carrying it around with you and I just wanted to have it for short time longer. I know you understand. Thank you for that. Your footlocker that you had got damaged in the move... I kept all the pictures with your autographs from several celebrities and salvaged what I could. The same boy who got your TMNT bus needed a foot locker or toy box so we told the Dad that they could have it. I guess it makes me feel better that it didn't go in the trash. Some other young boy will get pleasure out of it just like you did for so many years :)
I have to tell you that American Idol is starting tonight. I can remember the nights we would watch it together and talk and laugh at the auditions from the contestants. I am going to watch it tonight and remember all this. I hope that you will stop by and sit next to Mom and watch it with me. I miss our times. I miss you so much. I love you to the moon and back and all the way around the world.
Remember to be listening for Mom again to whisper to you later tonight. I will be looking to see my bright star shining up in the Heavens above. I will also be looking at the Full Moon too. I hope you have a wonderful night. May it be peaceful and beautiful for you my precious son. My Angel from above. Sweet dreams Tyler and please continue to watch over us all. I love you. Forever.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi peanut, how are you doing tonight? I hope you are well. I just came in from walking the pups and I saw my bright star in the sky. I whispered to you.... did you hear Mom? I hope so. I will have to walk the pups again later so I will make sure to whisper to you later tonight as well. The sky is so clear and cloudless. It is a crisp evening but nice. Today was a sunny day in the 70's so I will take it. It sometimes is hard to believe it is the middle of January with the weather we are having here. Never have experienced anything like it before but I am sure enjoying it.
Just spoke to Meme and she said that the weather up in NH is awful. Lots of cold weather with freezing rain and ice. There have been quite a few accidents around that area as well. Just so sad. I worry about everyone who has to drive in it. Makes me feel better when I know our loved ones are safe at home. I know you are with them as well when they are driving so thank you from the bottom of my heart. It means so much to Mom.
Guess Bob isn't getting out. They keep pushing the discharge date back. Still having trouble dissolving the blood clot. I hope they get in under control soon. I know he wants to get out of there. I know you know what is going on and what will happen way before we all do. Can you please still continue to watch over Bob? Thanks Tyler. Again it means a lot to Mom and everyone else.
My day was pretty busy. I didn't sleep all that well last night because I was so tired yesterday afternoon and the nice nap I took didn't help me at all..ugh! I did however get up around 9 am and I made a nice breakfast for Mark & I, did all the dishes, did some housework, and I went through all my trunks in the apartment. I looked at what each one had in them and figured out what could stay and what could go. I found a lot of pictures and put them all in 1 box so I know where they all are. Later I will go through and make sure that everything is in order. I found your TMNT school bus and I gave it to a little boy who would enjoy it like you did. I know you wouldn't mind. It was hard for me to give it up though. I teared up but then I was ok. I couldn't give up your Splinter figure though. I kept that. I could still see you as a little boy carrying it around with you and I just wanted to have it for short time longer. I know you understand. Thank you for that. Your footlocker that you had got damaged in the move... I kept all the pictures with your autographs from several celebrities and salvaged what I could. The same boy who got your TMNT bus needed a foot locker or toy box so we told the Dad that they could have it. I guess it makes me feel better that it didn't go in the trash. Some other young boy will get pleasure out of it just like you did for so many years :)
I have to tell you that American Idol is starting tonight. I can remember the nights we would watch it together and talk and laugh at the auditions from the contestants. I am going to watch it tonight and remember all this. I hope that you will stop by and sit next to Mom and watch it with me. I miss our times. I miss you so much. I love you to the moon and back and all the way around the world.
Remember to be listening for Mom again to whisper to you later tonight. I will be looking to see my bright star shining up in the Heavens above. I will also be looking at the Full Moon too. I hope you have a wonderful night. May it be peaceful and beautiful for you my precious son. My Angel from above. Sweet dreams Tyler and please continue to watch over us all. I love you. Forever.
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi sweetheart, how are you doing tonight on this Tuesday evening? I hope that everything is going just the way you want it in the Heavens above! Mom is doing well tonight but tired. I had wrote to you last night that I was going to be watching a 5 year old today to help a neighbor out. I indeed woke up at 5 am and the little boy was here at 6:20 am and full of piss and vinegar! It has been several years since I have watched a 5 year old and boy how I forgot just how much energy children have and how much it sucks the energy out of us adults..lol! He was a very well mannered boy but just all over the place wanting to do this and do that you had to keep a very close eye on him. He was fun but when his Mom came to get him I made lunch for Mark & I and then I had to lay down and take a nap. I was so tired I couldn't even see straight. I would like to think it was because of getting up so early and not being used to it but it probably is a combo of being up early and being old, hahaha! The moral to the story is that it brought back so many memories of you being younger and all the fun I had with you. Plus... I survived the day!
I really didn't do much else today.. clean up the apartment a little and then made dinner. Spoke to Meme & Aunt Becky today as well. Aunt Becky & John are getting ready to leave on Sunday for their 4 week trip to South America. They are excited to go back there and do some travel and work. Please be with them during their flights and wherever they may go. Let them be safe and return to the States safely. Thanks pumpkin! Meme seemed good but sounded tired still. Guess she really is having a hard time with everything so could you please go and be with her as well. Sit beside her so that she can get some good sleep and feel better. I worry about her being so far away. I wish I could be there for her and be closer but I can't. I am doing all that I can from where I am. Thank you again..as Meme would say.. her Peanut!
Didn't get a chance to speak to Bob tonight but I will call him in the morning. He will not be released tomorrow because they are still having some issues to work out. Guess they are trying for Friday now. He seems to be progressing and getting better it is he is just not where they, the doctors would like him to be at this point. Please could you be with Bob as well so that he is not alone? Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I know I seem to ask a lot from you but you are the only one I can count on to be in several places at once as Mom can not. You are amazing to Mom and I know you will do all that you can to help us all out. You are my precious and incredible Angel from above!!! I miss you so much, Tyler. I miss everything. The days go by and it doesn't get easier, it gets different but harder if that makes any sense. I miss your smile, your laugh, your voice, our conversations. I just miss you!!! I love you so much...more than any words I could ever express to you or anyone else. You are still my world. You always will be :)
The sky is clear tonight so when I take the pups out I will be looking to the sky and whispering to you. Please be listening to you and I hope you hear me. I will be looking to see you shining brightly. I hope you night is filled with happiness, love, laughter, and so much more. Let it be all that you want it to be. Fly high my sweet son. Sweet dreams and know that I love you to the moon & back and all the way around the world. Forever!
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi sweetheart, how are you doing tonight on this Tuesday evening? I hope that everything is going just the way you want it in the Heavens above! Mom is doing well tonight but tired. I had wrote to you last night that I was going to be watching a 5 year old today to help a neighbor out. I indeed woke up at 5 am and the little boy was here at 6:20 am and full of piss and vinegar! It has been several years since I have watched a 5 year old and boy how I forgot just how much energy children have and how much it sucks the energy out of us adults..lol! He was a very well mannered boy but just all over the place wanting to do this and do that you had to keep a very close eye on him. He was fun but when his Mom came to get him I made lunch for Mark & I and then I had to lay down and take a nap. I was so tired I couldn't even see straight. I would like to think it was because of getting up so early and not being used to it but it probably is a combo of being up early and being old, hahaha! The moral to the story is that it brought back so many memories of you being younger and all the fun I had with you. Plus... I survived the day!
I really didn't do much else today.. clean up the apartment a little and then made dinner. Spoke to Meme & Aunt Becky today as well. Aunt Becky & John are getting ready to leave on Sunday for their 4 week trip to South America. They are excited to go back there and do some travel and work. Please be with them during their flights and wherever they may go. Let them be safe and return to the States safely. Thanks pumpkin! Meme seemed good but sounded tired still. Guess she really is having a hard time with everything so could you please go and be with her as well. Sit beside her so that she can get some good sleep and feel better. I worry about her being so far away. I wish I could be there for her and be closer but I can't. I am doing all that I can from where I am. Thank you again..as Meme would say.. her Peanut!
Didn't get a chance to speak to Bob tonight but I will call him in the morning. He will not be released tomorrow because they are still having some issues to work out. Guess they are trying for Friday now. He seems to be progressing and getting better it is he is just not where they, the doctors would like him to be at this point. Please could you be with Bob as well so that he is not alone? Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I know I seem to ask a lot from you but you are the only one I can count on to be in several places at once as Mom can not. You are amazing to Mom and I know you will do all that you can to help us all out. You are my precious and incredible Angel from above!!! I miss you so much, Tyler. I miss everything. The days go by and it doesn't get easier, it gets different but harder if that makes any sense. I miss your smile, your laugh, your voice, our conversations. I just miss you!!! I love you so much...more than any words I could ever express to you or anyone else. You are still my world. You always will be :)
The sky is clear tonight so when I take the pups out I will be looking to the sky and whispering to you. Please be listening to you and I hope you hear me. I will be looking to see you shining brightly. I hope you night is filled with happiness, love, laughter, and so much more. Let it be all that you want it to be. Fly high my sweet son. Sweet dreams and know that I love you to the moon & back and all the way around the world. Forever!
Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Monday, January 13, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi Pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? I hope that everything is going smoothly for you up in Heaven. I wish that things were going smoothly for us here. Things are just so dang crazy Tyler. I am trying to stay out of most of it so that I don't get stressed out. It is working at times but other times not so much.
I was so happy tonight when I went out to walk the pups that the sky was clear and the stars were shining brightly. I did whisper to you so I hope that you heard Mom. The sky is so clear that I can see either the Little Dipper or the Big Dipper.. not sure which one it is. I will have to do some research on this and let you know. The stars are just so pretty. I know I will be able to see you shining brightly the next few nights because the weather here is suppose to be in the 70's and sunny. That means clear night skies too.
Today was a kind of busy day for Mom. I did a lot of housework... mopping, sweeping, vacuuming, dusting and laundry. I also went through my shoes.. yup I here you saying that is an all day event..lol and got rid of all the ones that I don't wear or didn't want any longer. You will be proud of me as I gave away over 40 pairs today and with all the ones I gave away back in September I know have only 38 pairs of shoes...that includes all fashion boots, winter boots, high heels, flats, and flip flops! I think I have done so well with this and I am proud of myself! Starting with well over 250 pairs of shoes, etc...and now just 38!!! Holy cow.. Mark was impressed with me too. He really couldn't believe it!
I actually have to go to bed early tonight. I received a text message from our Dog Sitters Mom asking if there was any way that I could watch her 5 year old son tomorrow. She had to be at work in the morning and her regular babysitter & boyfriend could not do it. I said yes that I would. She will be here with him at 6 am. This will be interesting as I have not taken care of a 5 year old since you & Bean and I have not been up at 5 am in over a year unless I was flying somewhere. I will write about it in my letter to you tomorrow night. Wish me luck :) I know I can hear you laughing & shaking your head saying " Oh Mom "
Please continue to watch over our family. Bob is still in the hospital and Meme is still having trouble too. We all appreciate what you do for us from above. We are all so lucky to have you as our Angel. I love you so much my precious son and I miss you like crazy. Please know I do. My life is just not the same without. It never will be again.
I hope that you have a quiet, peaceful night. I hope you have many sweet dreams. Fly high and fly free Tyler. Tell everyone I said hello and I miss them. If you get a chance give them hugs from Mom, but make sure someone hugs you so big and tight... that one will be from me. I love you. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi Pumpkin! How are you doing on this Monday evening? I hope that everything is going smoothly for you up in Heaven. I wish that things were going smoothly for us here. Things are just so dang crazy Tyler. I am trying to stay out of most of it so that I don't get stressed out. It is working at times but other times not so much.
I was so happy tonight when I went out to walk the pups that the sky was clear and the stars were shining brightly. I did whisper to you so I hope that you heard Mom. The sky is so clear that I can see either the Little Dipper or the Big Dipper.. not sure which one it is. I will have to do some research on this and let you know. The stars are just so pretty. I know I will be able to see you shining brightly the next few nights because the weather here is suppose to be in the 70's and sunny. That means clear night skies too.
Today was a kind of busy day for Mom. I did a lot of housework... mopping, sweeping, vacuuming, dusting and laundry. I also went through my shoes.. yup I here you saying that is an all day event..lol and got rid of all the ones that I don't wear or didn't want any longer. You will be proud of me as I gave away over 40 pairs today and with all the ones I gave away back in September I know have only 38 pairs of shoes...that includes all fashion boots, winter boots, high heels, flats, and flip flops! I think I have done so well with this and I am proud of myself! Starting with well over 250 pairs of shoes, etc...and now just 38!!! Holy cow.. Mark was impressed with me too. He really couldn't believe it!
I actually have to go to bed early tonight. I received a text message from our Dog Sitters Mom asking if there was any way that I could watch her 5 year old son tomorrow. She had to be at work in the morning and her regular babysitter & boyfriend could not do it. I said yes that I would. She will be here with him at 6 am. This will be interesting as I have not taken care of a 5 year old since you & Bean and I have not been up at 5 am in over a year unless I was flying somewhere. I will write about it in my letter to you tomorrow night. Wish me luck :) I know I can hear you laughing & shaking your head saying " Oh Mom "
Please continue to watch over our family. Bob is still in the hospital and Meme is still having trouble too. We all appreciate what you do for us from above. We are all so lucky to have you as our Angel. I love you so much my precious son and I miss you like crazy. Please know I do. My life is just not the same without. It never will be again.
I hope that you have a quiet, peaceful night. I hope you have many sweet dreams. Fly high and fly free Tyler. Tell everyone I said hello and I miss them. If you get a chance give them hugs from Mom, but make sure someone hugs you so big and tight... that one will be from me. I love you. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Sunday, January 12, 2014
Dear Tyler,
Hi my sweet son! How are you on this Sunday evening? I hope you are well. Today was a better day for all. The weather was wonderful and sunny..warm too! Mark & I went out to grab things we needed and then came back and took the pups on a very long walk. Half way through walking home poor Max was so tired. Snickers actually got pretty tired as well. Got back and they both drank water and laid themselves on the floor and have been pretty much sleeping ever since. Quiet evening that is for sure. Watch football, made dinner and now I am writing to you.
Spoke to Meme today a few times. She sounds better. She just needs to get some sleep. She hasn't been lately and she is really tired. Spoke to Bob tonight. He really sounds good. No trouble breathing and he is talking really good. Doctors were in today to see him and they are figuring out his medicines and probably going to let him go tomorrow or Tuesday. Thank you so much for being with them both during this hard time. Please continue to be with Meme during the night so that she can get some rest and also watch over Bob so that he is not alone too.
Nothing else really is going on. Like Mom said today was a very mellow day for us here. It was an overall relaxing weekend just doing things but nothing rushed. It felt nice for a change. I can't believe that it is already the middle of January. Holy crap how time is passing by and so fast too. Sometimes it just really blows my mind.
Oh yeah.. I still need to download that picture. I forgot to today as this is the first time I have been on my computer all day. I will promise to do it tomorrow and get it on here. I am so sorry.
I was so happy last night because I did indeed get to see the stars in the sky. There was 1 really bright one. I believe that was you. I whispered to you so I hope that you heard Mom. The clouds were rolling in earlier tonight. Guess we are suppose to get some rain tomorrow. Not sure if I will be able to see the stars but I will be sure to whisper to you as I do nightly. I miss you so much, Tyler. I hope you know this. I hope that you never forget this. I love you with all my heart and soul. I love you more than all the stars in the sky and to the moon and back. You are missed so much by so many people. I always talk about you and so do so many others. It is so nice and refreshing to hear. It makes me sad but it also makes me smile.
I hope that you have a wonderful evening my precious son. Sweet dreams. Fly high and fly freely up in the clouds and sky. Please continue to watch over us. I love you bunches. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Hi my sweet son! How are you on this Sunday evening? I hope you are well. Today was a better day for all. The weather was wonderful and sunny..warm too! Mark & I went out to grab things we needed and then came back and took the pups on a very long walk. Half way through walking home poor Max was so tired. Snickers actually got pretty tired as well. Got back and they both drank water and laid themselves on the floor and have been pretty much sleeping ever since. Quiet evening that is for sure. Watch football, made dinner and now I am writing to you.
Spoke to Meme today a few times. She sounds better. She just needs to get some sleep. She hasn't been lately and she is really tired. Spoke to Bob tonight. He really sounds good. No trouble breathing and he is talking really good. Doctors were in today to see him and they are figuring out his medicines and probably going to let him go tomorrow or Tuesday. Thank you so much for being with them both during this hard time. Please continue to be with Meme during the night so that she can get some rest and also watch over Bob so that he is not alone too.
Nothing else really is going on. Like Mom said today was a very mellow day for us here. It was an overall relaxing weekend just doing things but nothing rushed. It felt nice for a change. I can't believe that it is already the middle of January. Holy crap how time is passing by and so fast too. Sometimes it just really blows my mind.
Oh yeah.. I still need to download that picture. I forgot to today as this is the first time I have been on my computer all day. I will promise to do it tomorrow and get it on here. I am so sorry.
I was so happy last night because I did indeed get to see the stars in the sky. There was 1 really bright one. I believe that was you. I whispered to you so I hope that you heard Mom. The clouds were rolling in earlier tonight. Guess we are suppose to get some rain tomorrow. Not sure if I will be able to see the stars but I will be sure to whisper to you as I do nightly. I miss you so much, Tyler. I hope you know this. I hope that you never forget this. I love you with all my heart and soul. I love you more than all the stars in the sky and to the moon and back. You are missed so much by so many people. I always talk about you and so do so many others. It is so nice and refreshing to hear. It makes me sad but it also makes me smile.
I hope that you have a wonderful evening my precious son. Sweet dreams. Fly high and fly freely up in the clouds and sky. Please continue to watch over us. I love you bunches. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!
Saturday, January 11, 2014
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