Dear Tyler,

Hi sweetheart. How are you today? I hope that you are doing well and are so happy doing all that you need to and want to up there in the sky! Mom is doing well today. The weather was sunny and in the 50's so that was nice. Guess we are going to be getting a few days of rain, but the weekend looks promising with 75 degree temps and partly sunny skies so I will take that!!! 
 I wanted to let you know that Meme called me tonight. Guess Bob is doing ok. He did some things outside today so I am guessing that it was a good sign that the medicine is working. We shall find out though in a couple of days. Thank you for watching over him.
 Spoke to Aunt Becky tonight as well. They just got back from a little trip to PA to see John's daughter and grandchildren. They are leaving for South America in 13 days. Please watch over them while they are there and both their flights to and from. We want them to have a great time but be safe as well. I did have an interesting conversation with Aunt Becky though. I heard from her that you were with me a couple weeks ago. It must have been around Christmas time. She said you were standing next to me with one hand one my heart and one on my back. That made me feel so good. To know that you are always so near. Thank you! Aunt Becky also mentioned that on New Year's Eve her and John were in a medicine circle and she called you in. She told you that she wanted you to help Mom out. She knows that I am not always open on how I am feeling about losing you, but she isn't naive either. She knows that I hurt. What she told me next surprised me a great deal. She said you told her that I needed to miss you not mourn you and there was a difference. I had to be honest and say that hurt me. I do miss you. I tell you that all the time. I miss everything. All the times we would be together, our talks, our fun, good, bad, and the ugly times. I miss your smile, I miss your voice, I miss your laugh. I simply just miss everything.. I miss you! I don't know what else to say or do for you to know this or to believe Mom. Please help me out so that you know. Tyler... what can I do??? Will you please help me. I can't even put into words how much I hurt. No words can express what and how I feel. I just really keep it to myself because I don't think anyone can relate to me at this time. I am so sorry. I feel like somehow I have let you down. Will you please help Mom??? Thank you.
 I think you will be impressed with me though. For the first time I am playing a game of Chess with Mark. I do not really know what I am doing and I believe I am getting my a** kicked but I am trying and I think I am somewhat getting the hang of it. Mark has 9 of my pieces and I have 6 of his. I remember you trying to teach me and I would get so confused. Nothing has changed..trust me!!! You used to impress Mom with your skills at playing Chess and Poker!!! I still to this day talk about it to everyone! I will let you know how the game turns out!!!
 I just let the pups out and the sky is cloudy. I did whisper to you to let you know I couldn't see any stars but I would check back later. I hope to see the stars shining brightly. I hope to see you! If I don't I will make sure to whisper to you again. I hope you will be there to listen for Mom. I miss you with all my heart and soul. I love you beyond words. Too the moon & back and all the way around the world. 
 Have a great night pumpkin. Sweet dreams my precious son and Angel above. Watch over us all and keep us healthy and safe. Thank you for all that you do. Love you, Tyler.
 Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!