Dear Tyler,

I hope you are doing well tonight. Mom has a very heavy heart. Been a rough day for me today. It first started out with knowing the date.. the 19th. The remembering the dreaded phone call that I received about what happened to you. The worrying and unknowns throughout the day and into the night knowing what the doctors told me. My head was a whirlwind. How could it be.. the night before we were laughing and joking around on skype for 1 1/2 hours. It was so unreal to me. I never could imagine that I would never hear your voice again. I cherish that night on skype so much. No one knows just how much I do. Second... went out shopping today and saw a bunch of Jack stuff from Nightmare Before Christmas and I had a major meltdown right in the store. It hit me so hard. I just couldn't stop crying. I came back to the apartment and I placed a couple of your Jack things on my computer desk. I am looking at it as I type you this. I found so many things that I knew that you would love. It is just so hard for Mom. I can here you singing " This is Halloween " right now. Oh how you loved that dang movie..lol! BTW.. The movie is playing tomorrow on TV. Think I just may have to sit down and watch it..just for you. If that wasn't enough for me to deal with the third thing was that I just turned on the computer and saw that my friends son committed suicide this morning. He was your age. He graduated the same year you did..2008 from Stevens ( the school Mom graduated from ). His name is Nick Howard. Can you do me a favor and show him the ropes for his Mom and his entire family. My heart hurts for them all. Thanks buddy.
 Wanted to let you know that Marion's Mom is doing well. She had her first surgery today and from what I know she made it through ok. Just either 1 or 2 more to go next week. Thank you for watching over them. Please give my huge hugs and thanks to everyone else that was helping too. 
 Just walked the dogs for the last time tonight and I saw my same bright star sitting there where it always does in the sky. I would like to think that is you every night watching over us. I whispered to you as I always do. Did you hear me? I hope so. 
 Mom is fairly tired tonight due to all the emotions going through me. I am going to close this letter but please know that I miss you so much and I love you even more. To the moon and back and all the way around the world. Remember that forever. Sweet dreams my precious son. Always, Mommy xoxoxo. Muah!